I woke up startled. I felt a heavy feeling settle throughout my chest. What was that? I glanced down at my sleeping mate and looked over at the small bassinet for Ryder. There were monitors attached to the bassinet as a precaution in case his little lungs or heart struggle at night. Mae told us an alarm would sound if there was an emergency. He was sleeping soundly for now at least. I could even hear faint, soft snores coming from him. I smiled as I watched him for a little while.

"What's wrong?" Ryland spoke, his voice groggy and hoarse from just waking up. He sat up slowly, rubbing his eyes before snaking an arm around my waist. He nuzzled into my neck breathing in my scent, as he peppered gentle kisses along my neck and shoulder.

"Nothing, go back to sleep." I whispered pressing a gentle kiss to his lips. I felt so sore down there, but decided I needed to get up for a little bit.

I slowly put pressure on my feet before standing up, keeping my arms out slightly for balance. I waddled into the closet and pulled on a pair of large sweatpants before leaving the room. I needed to talk to Lydia.

I made my way down the hallway and paused when I reached their door. Maybe I should turn around. It is the middle of the night. I needed to talk to her about what happened. I needed to make sure she was alright after... all of that.

I slowly raised my hand to the door but before I could knock the door cracked open. I could see Lydia standing there, she looked exhausted but relieved to see me. She swung the door open and flung herself at me. I nearly jumped but I relaxed when I felt sobs wrack through her body as she hugged me like her life depended on it.

"I'm s-so so s-sorry." She cried. "I-I never meant to hurt you, to hurt anyone."

I heard the floorboards creak and saw Kolton walk over rubbing his eyes.

"What happened?" He asked walking over to us, standing in the doorframe.

"Can you just give us a minute?" I asked him  quietly, as I ran a hand up and down her back.

"Of course, it's not like it's the middle of the night or anything." He groaned walking down the hallway and towards the stairs.

"It wasn't your fault." I whispered. "None of this was your fault so stop blaming yourself." I told her holding onto her shoulders.

"I'm sorry I hurt you when I killed it, I wasn't in control." I frowned.

"N-No you have nothing to apologize for, Octavia. You saved me." She breathed, holding onto me tighter.

We just hugged each other and cried for a while. I just needed my sister back again and I think deep down some part of her needed me too. We were both losing ourselves in the chaos of this war and all the magic that came with it.

"I'm going to go check on the Ry's." I chuckled to myself.

"The Ry's?" She asked with a confused look.

"Your nephews name is Ryder Darkstone Woods." I couldn't help the smile that took over my face thinking about our precious baby.

A smile took over her face as tears filled her eyes. She immediately pulled me into another bone crushing  hug.

"Congratulations." She smiled.

"I'll introduce him to everyone in the morning, but for now I really should go back, Ryland won't be too thrilled if he wakes up and I'm gone." I chuckled softly thinking about my sometimes overly protective mate. She just nodded and walked me back before leaving to go tell Kolton he could go back to his bed.

I slowly walked in and saw Ryder's pitch black eyes open staring up at me. I smiled as I walked over and carefully picked him up. He was grabbing at my shirt with his little fists and starting to fuss, so I quickly fed him, before gently patting his back.

"Look at you." Ryland sounded proud. I smiled at the sound of his voice.

I leaned back against his chest as he watched Ryder in my arms.

"I love you." I whispered up to him.

"I love you more than anything." He whispered pressing a kiss to my jaw.

——————————————————————

We were sitting in the living room, everyone wanted a turn holding Ryder. James was hogging him and everyone was mad. Except dad he was just as grumpy as ever. He was looking out the window watching as the snow began to fall again.

I stood up and walked over to him, looking up at him with a raised brow.

"What's wrong?" I asked him when he remained silent.

"Nothing." He sighed still staring out the window.

"Clearly something is wrong." I whispered.

"Where is your mother?" He asked softly this time tearing his eyes away to look at me, trying to change the subject.

"I don't know, isn't that something you should know?" I asked him raising a brow.

"Have you met your mom, since when do I ever have any clue where she is or what she's up to." He chuckled, thinking about all the adventures mom has unexpectedly gone on.

"I haven't actually seen her today." I muttered more to myself, starting to worry a little.

Dad looked at me now with a concerned look.

"What's wrong?" I leaned into Rylands touch when he walked up behind me.

"Have you seen my mom?" I asked him looking up into his dark green eyes.

"No, I haven't seen her since she brought back Ryder last night." Ryland spoke as he looked back at the others.

"Wait what do you mean, brought him back? She said she was staying with you guys to help with Ryder." He spoke as anger flashed through his eyes. Mom lied. What was she doing?

"I just mind-linked the warriors on the border watch, they saw nothing." Ryland spoke looking concerned as well.

"What happened?" Lydia asked quietly walking over.

"Mom is missing." I told her.

"How the hell is mom missing?" She asked with a raised eyebrow. I just gave her a look.

"Do you know where she could be?" I figured asking her wouldn't be a bad idea.

"What am I? A fortune teller?" Her voice dragged through my mind. "She can handle herself though." I knew mom could handle herself, but that didn't mean we couldn't worry, everyone has their limits, including her.

"Fuck." Dad growled. "She fucking went after Cade. She kept bringing stuff up yesterday but I didn't think much of it." My eyes widened at the realization. Dad bolted past us and Jake quickly followed.

"I-I can make a portal." Lydia spoke hesitantly. She was starting to look a lot better but I wouldn't want to risk anything, not yet anyway.

"Do it." Dad spoke. "How long can you hold it?" He asked, she looked over at me hesitantly.

"I-I don't know, not as long as mom." She frowned.

"Just get us through." I spoke.

"You're not going." Ryland growled softly in my ear. I gave him a look but he matched it in return.

"I'm almost completely back to normal." I protested. Mom and Mae had helped a lot with my recovery and the pain. "I'm going." I told him. He just gave me another one of his looks.

"I'll stay with Ryder." James spoke calmly. "I'll speak with the other packs as well. This will be good uncle, nephew bonding." He chuckled. I just shook my head at his lack of seriousness. Lydia took a deep breath and wind quickly filled the room, Ryland held tightly onto my hand as the portal began taking shape. Dad and Jake quickly jumped in without thinking then Jeremiah followed by us. The familiar feeling of nausea washed over me before the scenery changed. We were back outside of the temple. The prison. I swallowed hard at the sight of this hell again.

"You do not have to go in." Ryland spoke turning so he was all I could see. My eyes were darting around what I could see as images of those men filled my mind. My chest felt like it was tightening, like there wasn't enough room in my body for my lungs to fill up with air.

"Look at me." He whispered softly, lifting his hand to tilt my chin up so I was looking into his eyes.

He pulled me against his chest, holding onto me tightly.

"Go." Ryland ordered the others. "We will meet you in there." I heard their shoes moving through the snow as the heavy door I once got out of creaked. I wanted to speak, to tell him I was okay, but it was as if my mouth forgot how to get words out.

"Breathe with me." He whispered firmly. I felt his abdomen push out as he took a deep breath, moving my body slightly along with his.

"Come on." He ordered. I took a deep breath when he did.

"Good girl." He whispered pressing a kiss to my head. He ran his hand up and down my back until I got myself settled.

"If it's too much, at any point. You tell me." There was no room for argument in his tone. I just nodded and held onto his hand impossibly tighter.

"I'm proud of you." He whispered kissing me one last time before we made our way into my personal hell. Ryland was mind-linking with Jeremiah to get their exact location. I felt my body tense as the all too familiar stone staircase surrounded us.

"I will not allow us to be held here again. We are stronger than him. Do not forget that, human."

I felt slightly more at ease at her words, but I don't think anything will ever get rid of that vicious grip that is constantly pulling my heart and my mind in a thousand different directions at once. The hallway was dark, and I could hear the familiar drips of water that never let up, echo through my skull. I pressed my hands to the cold walls. I shouldn't have come here. What the fuck was I thinking? I can't do this. I can't do this. I can't do this. I stopped on the steps, the dark and cold cement hallway in view.

"Your mother needs you. Do not let this fear take over. We are stronger than him." She spoke again.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Ryland squeeze my hand, reminding me that this is real. That he would be with me, that the shadow queen would be with me. I wasn't alone this time. I didn't know whether that made me feel better or worse.

My heart was beating so fast in my rib cage that I was afraid it would explode. I stared in horror as we made our way down the hallway to where the others were standing. We were going to have to walk past the cell.

Jeremiah walked over to my side noticing my face. Dad was whispering with Jake and pointing down the hallway. I couldn't hear them though. I felt like my head was underwater, my ears were filled with a ringing sound. I felt Jeremiah take my other hand, squeezing gently as well.

I tore my eyes away from the familiar door and looked back at where Jake and dad were standing. Now their attention was back on me.

They began moving, almost dragging me along with them. Visions of them dragging me down the hallway, by those chains filled my mind. I glanced down at the scars peeking out from my sleeves. They were dead. That is over. I am safe. I am safe. I am safe. I chanted it through my head over and over, hoping eventually my body would register that it was the truth.

I felt bile rise in my throat, when we walked past the door, I could see the shattered chains decorating the floor, the darkness and pain emanating from that room, as if I had just been in there yesterday. I pulled away from Ryland and Jeremiah as I emptied the contents from my stomach on the cement floor. Ryland rubbed my back and whispered sweet nothings in my ear as I took deep breaths. Jeremiah was crouching down next to me as well.

"Hey, look at me." Jeremiah whispered. I cautiously lifted my head, my tear filled eyes meeting his beautiful blue ones. "It gets easier, but this will never go away." He spoke pointing at my chest. "This feeling will always be there, but don't let them win by reacting, by giving in to that pain. You will feel it, it will feel like hell but don't let them think they won, show them that you overcame it, that you were stronger than they ever would be." He told me, an emotion swimming through his eyes that I had never thought I would see. Ryland tensed next to me, slowly pulling me back up to my feet.

I took another deep breath and this time I walked down the hallway, towards Jake and dad. Ignoring the room, the pain, the vivid memories. Jeremiah is right. They will not win, I refuse to let them win. I refused to let my mind focus on the unsettling feeling overtaking my body.

We all walked down the hallway, towards the large metal doors. Dad was about to say something when the whole room began shaking. Ryland gripped onto my waist and Jeremiah stood defensively next to me.

"Mom." I breathed. I shook out of their grip and sprinted. They were all right behind me. I began channeling the shadow queen as I felt my body move swifter through the dark corridor. I reached the door first and shoved it open. The shadows lining the hallway swarming us, in a thin barrier.

I could see mom standing across the room from Cade. Both their eyes snapped to us. Moms eyes widened in shock and worry but Cades faced turned into something sinister. A vicious smile took over his face. This was the arena-like room he had shown me in my mind. This was the room where the dagger was. I tensed and glanced back at mom. She yelled and raised her arms sending everyone back against the wall. Ryland growled never letting go of my hand. Cade's eyes were trained on mom again. He raised his hands splitting the ground in front of him, the ground cracking and splitting in moms direction. I could hear dad yelling but I couldn't see him. Mom quickly dodged it and went to send the crumpled pieces of destroyed marble flying towards him, but Cade immediately blocked it, turning the pieces into nothing but dust.

He smiled lifting his hand once more, mom screamed out in pain as she was slammed back into the wall, the marble walls cracking behind her. I could see the black veins protruding from her arms from here. I had to do something. I had to help. I felt my mind shift even more, allowing her full control. I dropped to the ground, my feet and my hand connecting with the cold, dark marble as I stared at Cade.

Cade looked over for a split second, but it was enough for him to let go of mom. She crumbled to the ground, breathing heavily.

Cade turned his full attention to me now.

"Octavia." I heard Ryland growl low.

"I love you." I whispered so quiet, I knew he was the only one who could hear me. He was groaning and cursing as he tried to get out of the force holding him to the wall.

"Hello, little niece." He chuckled. "Here to kill me?" He spat.

"Something like that." I smiled equally as vicious back. I quickly summoned all the shadows I could slamming him back. He raised his arms creating an almost phantom shield. I unleashed more feeling the shield crack. His eyes widened and he sent me flying back onto the ground. I quickly rolled as he launched himself at me. He had a dagger in his hand now, but I knew it wasn't the one I needed. He continued his various strikes, but I was faster than him. I kicked for his ankle knocking him off balance. I felt the shadows surge out of me knocking him away. He stumbled, but kept the dagger raised. I shoved the shadows at him, wrapping them around his legs, but he sent me flying back again. Suddenly I felt a hand grip mine. I looked over and saw mom. I suddenly felt an overwhelming amount of power flow through my body. Shadows erupted from me swarming the entire room. Cades eyes widened for only a split second but he quickly masked it.

"Remember the dark, Octavia." He smiled. "Remember all of our fun times here, how about your dear friends that just wanted to help you." They were monsters. All of them.

I felt the shadows waver slightly, but I quickly regained control. He paused again as footsteps echoed through the room.

"Well now this is certainly quite the family reunion." He laughed hysterically. I looked to my other side and saw Lydia. How did she get here. She stared at Cade with so much hatred, before extending her hand to me. Now Cade didn't do such a good job masking his emotions. I could see fear flash through his eyes.

I gripped her hand and screamed out as her power coursed through my body, rushing through my blood, crashing into my bones and flowing through my mind. I felt infinite.

The darkness enveloped everything. I felt the shadows surge forward towards him they knocked him down hard into the ground. The darkness charging into his mouth. His body convulsed as his eyes went blank. He clutched and clawed at his throat, trying desperately to get air through. I felt the darkness push through his chest, tearing at everything it could. Black blood pooled around him, staining the tile around him. His body continued convulsing before going limp. I released their hands nearly falling over. Mom waved her hand weakly as the others dropped to the ground.

They all began making their way over when I felt my legs give out underneath me.
I went to scream, as I felt my body get pulled towards the split floor. I flung my arms out trying to get traction to stop myself.

"OCTAVIA!" Ryland roared. I looked at his mesmerizing eyes one last time as he reached fore me, before I felt the darkness consume my vision.