I drag my feet as I head down the stairs with Pumpkin in tow. After the sex dream fiasco, part of me just wanted to stay huddled under the covers all day, but the last thing I need is more time in bed. I'm not interested in falling back asleep and risking another embarrassing dream.

I turn the corner and see Zahra refilling her coffee in the kitchen.

"How's it going?" she asks. "You take a nap?"

I can't help but cringe as the dream flashes in my mind.

"Doing that good, huh?" She laughs and gives me a questioning look.

"Uh... sort of."

She raises an eyebrow and gives me a confused look.

"Why are you turning five shades of red, girl? What happened? Something going on with your dream guy?"

Great. My face has clearly given me away.

"I embarrassed the crap out of myself." I cover my face with my hand and huff.

"Just now? Does he show up during your naps too? How does that work?"

"Ugghhh..." I groan. "I had a dream—one of those types of dreams."

"Like... just a regular dream-dream? Not with your man?"

"He's not my man, Zahr. And... sort of. It was a regular dream I guess, but it's hard to tell sometimes."

"So he wasn't there? Was the dream about him?" Her brows furrow and she takes a sip of her coffee.

"It's complicated. The dream was about him, but I may or may not have yelled his name and then... he uh—Kieran, the real one—showed up."

Zahra coughs and sputters as she chokes on her coffee. Her eyes go wide as she realizes what I said.

"He... crashed your sex dream??"

"Yes."

"Oh jeez. Oh my god that is really embarrassing. I would die. Did he mean to?"

"No, he heard me call him."

"He can do that? Wow. I mean, I don't know how this dream-walking stuff works but that's really impressive. So wait he heard you call... oh no. Call him? Like... oh no no no."

"Yep yep yep." I pinch my eyes shut and lean back against the kitchen wall. "I'm pretty sure I'll never be able to look him in the eye again."

"But you two are sleeping together, right? It's not like it's something he hasn't seen before."

"We're not."

"Still? What's up with that?"

I give her a glare.

"I don't sleep with every guy I meet."

"No, but you do sleep with hot guys that you like. It's already been a few months with this one and you already had a sleepover—what are you waiting for?"

"I... I'm not waiting for anything. We're just... I dunno."

"You have feelings for him!" she squeals, her voice brimming with glee.

"What? No I don't. We're just friends."

"Come on. If you were just friends, you would have had sex already. From the brief look I got, the man is gorgeous—and you're comfortable with casual sex. But you're holding back. I think you're afraid of what you're feeling."

"You're- I-... You're wrong. I'm not holding back. We just haven't had a chance to-"

"Come on, girl. Are you lying to me or yourself?"

My chest tenses and I pinch my lips shut. She's making me uncomfortable, but I can't tell if it's because she's wrong or because she's right.

Am I avoiding having sex with Kieran because I'm worried I'm catching feelings?

I guess there's one way I could find out.

*****

I'm not sure who I'm trying to prove a point to—to Zahra? To myself?

But I need to know that I'm not too far gone. That I can sleep with Kieran and walk away. That whatever I'm feeling for him is just lust, nothing more.

That's why I'm standing outside of Pike's in pink velvet mini-dress, black faux fur jacket, and studded black pumps. It's extra—but I'm extra. At least no one can accuse me of being boring.

I push through the front door and am met with a gust of warm air and the lively chatter of the crowd. I spot Kieran standing behind the bar chatting to some customers and a fellow bartender. He's wearing a deep red, short-sleeved dress shirt unbuttoned over a tight white undershirt that pulls tight against the lines of his muscular chest and abs.

When I'm just a few feet from the bar, he spots me in his periphery and turns. His jaw goes slack and his eyes wander up and down my body.

"Holy fuck, Red! This dress is fucking... damn." He rubs his face with his palm then gives me another once over. "Are you here to make me come in my pants? 'Cause it just might work."

Why do I find that hot?

"Maybe," I say with a smirk, hopping into a seat at the bar.

He pretends to fall backward and dramatically clutches his chest.

"Shit, girl, you gotta watch what you say around me. You're gonna give me a goddamn heart attack one of these days."

He beats his chest a couple of times and the large pendant hanging from his neck bounces. It looks old and worn, with a gold medallion layered over a deep black opaque stone. The medallion features an intricate image of moons and a figure holding up their arms. It doesn't look like just an everyday accessory.

"New necklace?" I ask.

"Oh this?" He takes the pendant in his hand and flicks it back and forth between his fingers. "A friend found it for me."

He leans forward over the bar before continuing. "It helps me control my powers in case a gorgeous redhead comes along and gets my blood pumping a little too hard."

My eyes widen and he chuckles.

"Wait, so it's magic?" I ask.

"Yep. Looks dope, though, right?"

Okay, here's my in.

I drag a finger across the neckline of my dress toward my cleavage.

"Want to take it for a test drive?"

He freezes in place and his eyes drag slowly upward to meet mine. His Adam's apple bobs as he swallows hard. His pupils widen in a flash and his eyes become a deep, dark black.

"Are you teasing me, Red?" His voice is lower and rougher than before, like the revving of an engine.

He takes me in with the eyes of a predator, but tonight, he's my prey. He just doesn't know it yet.

"Nope. I mean it."

"Fuck." In a frantic motion, he pushes past his fellow bartender and reaches for the opening of the bar just a few feet from where I'm sitting. He lifts it and grabs my forearm, tugging me along to follow him into the back. The first room we reach is a small kitchen with a stainless steel sink and a large industrial refrigerator.

He stops and whips around to look at me.

"Red, are you sure? Becau-" He stops when I push him back against the wall and kiss him.

I don't want him to finish that sentence. Right now, I want something else.

He groans into my mouth and grabs two fistfuls of my ass. I swipe my tongue between his lips and reach down to palm his length.

"We should... we... to the other room," he huffs between hard breaths.

I nod and he tugs me further along into a large storage room with boxes stacked along its edges and a large cooler roughly the size of a dresser.

He closes the door and looks at me with a serious expression.

"You're sure this is what you want?"

I slip my coat off my shoulders and let it fall to the ground at my feet, revealing my body-hugging velvet dress. His head falls back and he lets out a shaky breath followed by a string of curses.

"You said if I wanted to be fucked I should come to you, right?" I say with a teasing smile. I step closer toward him until my body has him pinned to the door. This dress must be doing its job because his stare is fixed to my chest as his hands run up and down my curves.

"Yeah. Happy to oblige," he says breathily.

"Good."

I kiss a trail from his neck to his collarbone as my hands undo his fly. A low moan rumbles in his chest as I tug his jeans down just enough for his dick to spring free. I stroke him up and down with one hand.

"Do we need a condom? If you said demons can't-"

"Uh... No, w- we don't need a condom but-"

I start to lower to my knees, but he grabs my elbows and pulls me back up.

"Red, wait," he says, panting. He takes my head in his hands, directing me to look at him.

"Yeah?"

"Can we just take a second, here?" His expression is conflicted.

"For what?"

"This feels... I don't think..." He cringes and pinches the bridge of his nose. "I can't believe I'm saying this, but I don't think we should have sex right now."

He takes a step back with his hand curled into a fist and bites his knuckles with a pained expression.

"What? Are you joking?" I raise my eyebrows and try to look him in the eyes, but he turns toward the wall like he's almost hiding from me. "You have been propositioning me since the day we met. Now that I'm in, you're out?"

What is this? Is this just what all demons do? Play games with your emotions?

"No, it's just... fuck!" He rests his head against the wall with a loud thunk.

"Why won't you look at me?"

"Because it's impossible to look at you and have this conversation, Sam."

"What do you mean? What conversation?"

"I just don't think we should be fucking in the back room of the bar like this."

"You don't have sex at work?"

He chuckles and shakes his head. Right now, his laugh feels like a slap to the face.

"No, I definitely do, I ju-"

"Just not with me," I interject. "Gotcha."

I grab my jacket from the floor and push past him.

"Sam, stop! Shit!" he calls as I open the door and head back out to the bar. I hear him scramble and knock over some boxes behind me, but I don't wait.

"That was fast!" another bartender jokes as he sees me walk by. I hear Kieran following behind me. When his hand meets my shoulder, I immediately flinch away.

"Can you just give me a minute to explain?"

"Okay." I spin around and cross my arms over my chest. "Explain."

He opens his mouth, and his eyes widen. It's clear he never expected me to let him speak, because he just gapes at me like a fish.

"Shit," he says, sweeping back a few loose hairs. "It's just... with you and I... I don't know what it is. It's just different. I can't explain."

I didn't have high hopes that his reasoning would be good, but I expected a better attempt.

"No, Kieran, I get it—it's a game with you. You want what you can't have, and now that you can actually have me you don't want me anymore."

"Sam, that's not wh-"

"Then what is it?"

"I just-... taking you to the back room like that... it felt wrong."

"Oh, so suddenly you're picky?"

His eyes widen and his head jerks back at my words.

I don't even mean what I just said; I'm just hurt that for whatever reason I'm not good enough for the literal King of Lust.

Now I'm being rejected and I'm an asshole. This is a new low.

"Wow." He bites his lips together and stares at the ground for a moment. "Okay."

"I'm sorry," I say, using my fingers to wipe away a bit of makeup that migrated to the corner of my eye. "That wasn't fair. I'm just feeling rejected and I lashed out at you."

His expression softens and he rubs a hand down his face with a frustrated sigh.

"I'm not trying to reject you, Red."

"It's fine. I shouldn't have reacted the way I did. You have every right to change your mind. I just need some space right now."

He blinks at me a few times like he wants to say something, but he doesn't. So I turn around and walk out the door.

I make my way to my car, brushing off a tear as it makes its way down my cheek. I jump inside and lock the doors, then let out a shaky breath. I start the engine and begin to back out of my parking space, but my wheels seem to catch on something. I turn to see Kieran in front of my car, bent over with his hand wrapped around my car bumper.

What the hell is he even doing?

I shoot him a glare and roll down my window.

"What are you doing to my car?"

"Stopping you from leaving." His dark eyes bore into mine. "I don't want you to go home thinking I'm not attracted to you or that I'm fucking with your head or something."

I open my mouth to speak, but in a streak of motion he's sitting in the car beside me and my words come out as a surprised shriek.

"Holy shit," I curse. "How the hell are you so fast?"

"Demon King, remember?" he says with a shrug.

"Wait, were you just holding back the weight of my car with your hands?"

He nods, but in an oddly uncharacteristic move, doesn't follow it up with a tongue-in-cheek comment.

"I'm sorry I hurt your feelings just now. I just... acting like sex with you is just like it is with anyone else.... It feels like blasphemy to me."

I'm stunned and confused. What does he mean by that?

"What do you mean? What's different about me?"

"Everything is different about you, Red. You showed up like a molotov cocktail through the window and lit my whole fucking world on fire. That's why it's all new to me. That's why I don't have the words to explain myself. I don't know what I'm feeling around you sometimes."

Butterflies flood my stomach and I take a deep breath in. When he says things like that, it's hard not to want more—to want something real.

"I don't... I don't understand. You like me so you don't want to have sex with me?"

"Shit, no..." He rubs his face with his hand. "I want to have sex with you, but I don't want to be someone you just fuck, Sam. That's what I am to everyone. I get it, I do. I'm the guy people call for a fun time. Nobody wants to take me to a fucking office Christmas party or some shit, and I never really wanted to go to one anyway, so it worked for me just fine. Until you."

"You want me to take you to an office party?" I raise my brows and take in his somber expression. I don't have the heart to tell him there are no holiday parties at the strip club.

"No. I mean, maybe. I mean... I want you to want to take me."

"What does that mean, Kieran? What do you want from me?"

"I don't know. I'm still figuring it out. I know I want to be around you and I think about you all the time. I'm not used to the way my stomach clenches when I'm with you. Or the way it burns in my chest when it feels like you don't want me around. I don't know what it is and I don't understand it. I like how it feels, but it hurts too."

No. He can't do this to me. I haven't worked so hard to protect my heart for him to just break down my defenses with his sweet words and soul-melting eyes.

"I like you, Kieran, but I don't want to blur the lines between us. It's one thing to be friends with benefits, but you can't just say stuff like that to me. I'm sorry, but I don't want to have feelings for another man—or, whatever, demon—who can't be satisfied with just me."

He presses his palms to the dashboard then looks at me.

"What if I can?"

My heart flutters and my throat goes dry.

He doesn't mean what I think he means. He doesn't. He can't.

"You told me yourself you don't do relationships."

"Fuck whatever bullshit I said, okay? That was then; that was when I was an Incubus and I didn't have a choice. That was with people who weren't you."

My heartbeat thrums in my chest.

"So if we were... you would be with just me?"

"I already have been."

"What do you mean?"

"There hasn't been anyone since that first night in your dream."

My lips part and I blink, processing what he just said.

"You... you've been waiting for me?"

"Not exactly waiting. At first, I was just keeping an eye on you, which meant I was busy every night. But then I would get offers and it just felt... annoying. Why would I want to have a one-night stand when I could be hanging out with you? I just... I can't help it. I'm obsessed with you and everything and everybody else just sucks in comparison."

I suck in a sharp breath.

As much as I hate to admit it, I've let myself feel things for Kieran. I've let him burrow under my skin. Zahra is right—I've been kidding myself thinking I could just fool around with Kieran. We could never just be friends. We burn too hot together.

"I... uh... okay," I stammer, at a loss for words.

He smiles and takes my hand in his.

"I don't know what I'm doing here and I can't guarantee you I won't fuck this up, but I want to give this a shot. You and me. Not just sex. For real."

And once again—as is often the case when I'm with Kieran—I can't help but wonder if I'm really dreaming.

◆