Five and a half hours until sunset

"Sojir- Sir, Futaba said you were going to adop-"

The retired government official cut Ren off with a look. Not a harsh one, not like the ones he used to give Ren. Soj- Sir looked weary, as if he'd asked the same question over and over. Because they had.

This is where it'd ended.

"Son," he said quietly, and the word stabbed him through the chest. "We've talked about this. Futaba and I have done everything we can to get your parents to sign, but they won't even meet with us." Sir lowered his eyes. "There's... there's just nothing we can do."

Betrayal.

Ren had felt it before. He wasn't a stranger to it. In fact, the sting was almost comforting, a reminder of who he was and who- what- he came from.

The barista sighed and turned away as if he couldn't bear to see Ren's face.

This was why he should never have opened his heart. He should've kept it closed away, like Akira always told him to do. Or else, she always said, someone will steal it.

Ren had money. He would go home, as to not arise suspicion, and then leave by legal means. Ren wouldn't be one of those people who'd let their desires conquer them.

Fuck this place. Fuck the Phantom Thieves, who'd sweet-talked him as much as he them, and thrown him to the wolves afterwards. Fuck his Confidants and school and every elitist law that governed this damned country. They'd doomed Goro. They'd doomed Ren.

And the floor warped, the coffee scent soured, the spices became overwhelming. He stood in a mockery of the same place he'd just left, staring down a god with soulless black eyes.

And this is where it began.

Thanos-or Kronos, rather, as they were both playing to fool the wandering ghosts- guided him as he slowly created his world. In his mind's eye, Ren saw a city rise from ash and dust, made of wishes and wants.

And filled with the people he cared for. Ohya and Mishima and Iwai and Sojiro, all his Confidants and connections.

Ren created the Thieves to protect him, to serve.

He made Leblanc an invulnerable tower, but left the roof where Goro had let Ren hug him.

And Ren found that, although he could see it so well, that he couldn't build it at all. Something trapped his visions inside him. When he reached for it, the strands were thin and flexible, but when he tried to break them, the dimly glowing web held fast.

Ren looked at Kronos.

The god only tilted his head. His hollow black eyes bored into his own, as if he knew exactly the problem. "Are you prepared to give everything up for your Goro?"

Arsene for Goro.

You sold your heart and soul to your desires.

Everything had a price. And if Ren played his cards right, the Trickster might just fool a god and take both. The prize and the payment, both dancing in the palm of his hand.

"I am."

Ren drew Iwai's knives and slashed through the gold strands. They dissolved in a shower of sparks, searing his heart wide open.

You justified cruel actions with paltry worlds, and you have paid dearly.

The memories rewound themselves, pausing on two separate moments.

The betrayal at Leblanc. "Fuck his Confidants..."

And the world inside his head. "And filled with the people he cared for. Ohya and Mishima and Iwai and Sojiro, all his Confidants and connections..."

Contradictory, aren't they?

The web spiraled back into his vision, the frayed and split edges leaking gold.

You have hurt and been hurt, lost the world and gained the truth.

Images flashed too fast to comprehend, hazy, barely remembered fragments of dreams.

Where will you stand, Ren Amamiya?

Ren felt like he was swimming upward through molasses, and when he finally reached the surface, it was reluctant to release him.

First came his hearing. When he woke, there was the soft pad of paws against plastic, a whisper of wind.

Then he was assaulted with the uncomfortable feeling of being too warm and too cold at the same time. His back was pressed into thin, itchy fabric, and it occurred to his mush-brain that he could only feel this because his shirt was missing. The wind, soft and welcome as it was against his fevered skin, was cold.

Smoke, thin and acrid, wound its way in and coiled in his nose and forced a cough. His mouth tasted like metal.

Finally, Ren's sticky eyelids snapped apart, and he was awake.

He only had a moment to process that the world was so much duller than he remembered (Where had all the color gone?), the world was a truck, and that Ren's chest looked blotchy and his skin was sunken enough that his bones showed, before the door slammed open. He winced and jerked his hands back up to his ears. Too loud.

A woman stormed in. Ren didn't think he knew her, and ow, he was starting to wish his senses hadn't come back. She was tall and thin, with long hair and smooth skin and ringed eyes. She wore something between traditional samurai armor and the Western idea of a ninja. Also, the woman glowed. Actually glowed, as if the sun was trapped inside her.

And she was glaring at him with battle-wild eyes.

In a blink, she shrank and suddenly Ren knew her name. Trae, the little Treasure, the light in Jamestown's darkness, the caged bird.

"Trae," he rasped.

She regarded him in a very un-Trae-like way, then tossed a stack of papers on the seat next to him, barely held together by fraying string. "I believe these belong to you." Her voice was deeper than before. "Lying little brother."

A blur of black and white in the corner of his vision. Morgana was watching, quieter than usual, but always there. He was really relying on those cat instincts, wasn't he?

"Read. Try to remember." Trae jerked her head towards the door. "And the Thieves are facing our god. Do join us, if you can." She turned her back on him. "Coward," Trae muttered as she glided out.

Ren had wanted to say so much: what had happened; where were the Thieves; why was he lying here and why did he feel like death?; he wasn't a coward, Trae's momma was a-

Morgana padded down from another seat. "Hey, Ren," he murmured.

He coughed. "Hey."

He nudged the papers towards his limp hands, then ducked under his seat and pulled out some sort of energy bar. "Are you hungry?"

Ren was, but he also felt sick and didn't want to be cleaning vomit off Makoto's truck. She would kill him. "No."

Morgana seemed hesitant. "Are you okay?"

He shook his head as best he could while lying down.

"I guess... I'll leave you alone?"

Ren wanted to say thank you, but his mouth wouldn't open, and Morgana padded out after the awkward moment passed. He picked up the papers and read the ratty title, "The Days that Pass Us By."

He remembered this. Ren had written the first letter when he felt human again, right after Goro died. His feelings were spilled across three pages, the words as clumsy as Ren's shaking hands. Ink splotches marred the kanji.

Ren flipped to the next entry. And the next. And the next.

He started skipping through them, but the pages flipped by too fast in his graceless hands and stopped at a dog-eared one. Ren squinted at the text, no longer in Japanese, but a flowing, delicate script that seemed unnecessarily elegant. To his surprise, the knowledge was ingrained in his mind. He could easily read French.

My dear Goro Akechi,

It has been 119 days. My Palace is unconquerable. The foolish Thieves are running around it, trying to find a way to me. I've made it easy so I can have the pleasure of crushing them myself. They stand in the way of my goal.

Three more days, and Kronos will bring you back from the dead, and you will be mine.

Awaiting your arrival,

Ren.

This letter was far more brief than the others, and the words felt... sharper, was the best way he could describe it. Short and angry. It didn't sound like him at all.

There was another dog-eared page, and now Ren had no doubt that Trae left these for him to find. His face flushed at the thought of her going through such personal information. He flipped to the letter anyways.

To my beautiful love.

It's been 120 days, and you'll be mine in three more. The idiot, Ren failed to complete his part of the deal, but he did something right before he passed out. His desires manifested into this Palace.

I am Joker. When I succeed, I will give you everything. You don't deserve to fight for nothing. I will bring you to my Palace, and you will never have to fight agan. You don't deserve pain, so I will take everything painful away. You don't have to make difficult choices. I will make them for you. You don't deserve to be looked down upon. I will make you my king.

You deserve the world, and I will create it for you.

I would let you slit my throat if it pleased you. I would cut myself open, conquer countries, fight gods if it would bring a smile to your face.

Say the word, and it is yours, my dear.

Love,

Joker.

He slammed the book closed, breathing heavily. This was his handwriting... no, not his... Joker's. A Shadow's.

But a Shadow was part of him, and this disgusting letter had been written by Ren. Ren had wanted to bring Goro back, but beyond that, he wanted...

To own Goro. And if there was anything Goro cared about, it was his freedom. How could he have been so twisted as to steal freedom? It was the very thing he'd fought so hard for back in Shibuya?

The innocent stack of letters blurred before him.

It was the truth, though. He'd thought that. These letters reflected the honest truth, everything Ren was and wasn't. And if he'd learned anything from Shibuya, it was that the truth was an unavoidable thing.

The letters tumbled out of his grip, and he dimly heard the pages slap against the floor. His eyelids felt oh-so-heavy...

"Oh, good evening, Amamiya-kun." Goro settled his briefcase on the ground and leaned forward. He offered the Prince's charming smile, but Ren was unfazed. He was a thief, and he didn't settle for false treasures. He stole Goro's occasional wicked grins and knew they could never be taken back.

"Good evening, Goro," Ren purred back. He knew Sojiro was rolling his eyes at the appalling lack of honorifics, but his mark only laughed. "How was your day in the viper's nest?"

Sojiro let out a choked sound. His love's lips twitched. "I'd like my usual. No sugar, please."

Bad, then. He only ordered bitter coffee when he'd had a bad day.

Ren had already prepared both kinds. He slid it over the table and tilted his head at Goro, who didn't meet his eyes. "Do you want to talk about it?"

He laughed softly, as princely as always. "My fans would love to know, wouldn't they?"

"I'm not a fan," Ren said. "I'm a friend... if you consider me that." He shrugged. "I didn't mean to pry," he added, taking a leaf out of Goro's book.

"You're good with words." The Detective Prince took a sip. "Have you considered a career in the 'viper's nest', as you put it?"

Something hard and sharp caught him in the chest. Ren missed a beat. No, he wanted to say. No, I wouldn't want to be stuck there. No, I don't have a choice. No, I'll have to go home and be trapped again.

Some Thief he was, to be stuck behind bars.

"Are you alright?"

Ren shook himself out of his daze. "Of course."

Goro didn't push it, but a new light entered his eyes, clever and glittering. Ren saved this moment and tucked it away in his heart. It joined the other snippets of the real Goro, the cruel, beautiful thing that captured his heart.

This is your truth.

"What is it, Amamiya-kun?"

Ren led him up the stairs, and Goro flushed as he saw his attic room. The nervous look on his face was genuine.

"I-If you-"

Ren laughed. "No, nothing like that." His married mother had company almost every night. He'd heard the sounds enough that he'd become disgusted at the idea of letting someone in.

He opened the window outside his bed and gestured to Goro, whose curiosity and bloodlust were battling inside him. His curiosity won, and the Detective Prince climbed through the window.

Goro gasped. His eyes widened and his beautiful face tilted up at the star, bathed in the full moon's glow.

The attic was high enough that they had a good view of the stars. Sitting on the roof, admiring his love's astonished face, Ren looked up too. He dared to move closer to him, close enough their legs touched.

"Are you trying to seduce me?" Goro hissed venomously. Ren knew better than to flinch. He knew his love's temper.

"I just thought you'd like the peace," he said softly. "No one telling you what to do... it's like being free."

"It's an illusion of freedom." His wine-red eyes softened. "But if the world itself is an illusion... I suppose one could indulge in another fantasy."

On impulse, Ren wrapped his arms around Goro. He stiffened, and for a moment, he was sure he would be gutted. Then the detective relaxed.

Far above them, the thief knew the stars were smiling.

This is what your love was, before his death tainted it.

This was what you were.

Who will you stand as?

Images of a thousand different beings, monsters and humans, angels and demons, and they all felt like him. Choose, they whispered. Choose.

He knew their names. Alice, Titania, Attis, Vishnu, they flashed too fast for him to see now. Choose. Choose. Choose.

A human face flashed by, all elegance and charisma. He tilted his masked head and held out his hand, in which a card slowly rotated.

The World Arcana.

"Wildcard."

His eyes snapped open and he launched himself to his feet, frantically scrabbling for a weapon that wasn't there. His knives were gone-

He was alone.

Ren was in Makoto Niijima's truck, that much was obvious. She was fond of the rare Buchimaru keychains, which she kept on the steering wheel. It was unlikely anyone else would have them.

He was shirtless. His skin felt tight against his bones- some sort of injury was healed, and it'd been bad. His hair felt like it was clumping together, and when Ren ran a hand through, it came away dark red.

It was then he realized, while he'd been healed before, he felt no pain. None of the grogginess, no lingering aches, no sensitivity. He'd been completely healed, but Morgana wasn't here.

Which left-

It took him long enough.

Did our master figure it out? Can he hear us? a younger voice asked.

Well, Wildcard? a third prompted.

A wicked smile split Ren's lips. "Hello Titania, Alice, Attis."

Cheers in his head.

His mouth curved down in confusion. "Where have you been?"

We were trapped in the Mansion. The Wolf freed us, Attis explained.

"May I summon one of you?" He hesitated. "Titania?"

Blue flames exploded in front of him, and one Persona stepped out, gliding on elegant wings. She shook her mane of light hair and gave him a breathtaking smile. "To think you have finally decided who you are, after all this time." He realized it was her voice in his dreams.

"I have."

"Then let us proceed." She placed her hand on his chest, and cold spread through him. When it faded, he didn't feel anything different. The world was still grey and black and white. He was still alive- thank goodness, he thought dryly.

Then Ren realized that he felt... clean. His skin felt like it'd been scrubbed raw. He imagined his heart stinging, like it was an old book that had just been dusted. His chest felt lighter, too, like he'd been weighed down by it. "What did you do?"

She smiled again. "The Palace, dear. You remember what happened to those who had their heart stolen?"

Right. The 'overwhelming guilt' thing. "I see. Trae stole my heart?"

"And gave it back." Titania picked up the Days and pressed them into his hands. "Now you can choose whom you give it to."

Ren felt the familiar weight settle on his face, the whisper of fine fabric, the click of his boots, the leather on his forearms and the blades they carried, and grinned. Titania vanished with a graceful wave. "Mona!" he sang.

Sure enough, the feline poked his head into the truck. His eyes widened as Joker smirked at him. "You're back..."

"I'm already up to speed." He patted him behind the ears and gave him the book. "Hold onto this for me, will you?"

Morgana took it and studied him for a moment. "Showtime?" he said finally, his feline face breaking into a grin.

Joker slipped the knives out from his sleeves. "Showtime."

---

It's been two weeks. 1v1ing a god is sorta a difficult fight scene to write, you know!!!

thank you for sticking with me. This chapter's only 2800 words long, but... i mean, it's better than a 10,000 word essay being dumped in one chapter???

As for the title, you may have noticed Ren behaves differently throughout the story. You probably chalked it up to inconsistant writing- PERHAPS- but I actually made a use for it. He lost every other Persona except Arsene. They were trapped. His moods were erratic and stuff, and he finally's trying to settle on being one way instead of a thousand differnt things.

Okay, thanks! Any questions, feel free to ask!

Love yall!

Robin out!