Do you ever feel trapped in a situation

As if everywhere you go and you turn you're heading the wrong direction

I am willing to suffer, just for your happiness

I would rather live a horrible life because with you I am truly blessed

I don't understand who or what I am needed for

It seems whenever I read up on you I am in an eternal war

I close my eyes, I refuse to let my self cry

But it is hard to bite my tongue when you are the only one who makes me feel alive

I would do anything to just stand by your side- I even step back with a new stab wound made by lies

I listen to the words people have to say and for some reason I always get so angry

I am confused, I am scared, and I feel so helpless

Because I am so broken that no one should be able to love this

My pride gets in the way of what I allow myself to believe- now if only I could feel that way with my own self esteem

I have a lot of guts to curse out beliefs when I am no better at taking what critics have to speak

Sometimes I feel that I am in denial, but I cant help but swallow the words that taste so vial

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I cannot give up my self respect because no one seems to understand that is all I have left

I am been beaten, cursed, and I have begged on my knees but no one has ever given me a damn thing of mercy

I remember all the lonely nights I had the nerve to try and it never got better and I am still waiting to come out a see the day light

I understand that I can be happy in the church but for now I would rather just keep my feet planted on the earth

I am not ready, and I am not sure if I am willing to give up everything I've known but it seems that I look into eyes begging

I have to chose what I love more self respect or you but it doesn't seem to matter because either one I am going to lose

I cry, I bleed, and once or twice I've screamed, but I have even stopped praying because it was useless to me

I TRIED so hard but it doesn't seem to matter because I know for a fact that I am never going to get better

It doesn't matter if I ever get freaking well, because my dear sooner or later we are all going to Hell

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I should be able to just throw it all aside

The world you described to me seems to be the perfect life

I can't! I just can't imagine me in that position

I want to be with you but not any one other's disposition

I am dying, suffocating, gasping for air

I wish I could see myself in your eyes but I don't dare- look up because I know I've disappointed

I should have known that my opinions couldn't have been avoided

I can't give up the pain because I grew up this way

I know what they say that somehow God can save me at the end of the day

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It sounds nice, the simple, classic, boring, basic life

 I just wish that I could see past the fog and see what you see through the light

I want to be normal, but normal sounds so wrong

I guess I have always been able to sing the Devil's song