Thank you for reading.
**********************

It was infuriating. The rumors were everywhere. Everybody spoke about it. I heard it everywhere I went.

Some of the rumors said I stole Linda’s man, some others said Ben was just playing me because he still loved Linda and they were still having an affair.

The second rumor was based on the fact that Ben and Linda were seen everywhere together during the day. I was only seen with him at night.

The first rumor I choose to ignore because I believed I didn’t steal anybody from Linda. Ben made me believe that things were over between them and that was why I entered into the relationship with him.

The second rumor tempted me to believe it. How do you turn from lovers to best friends? Was that even possible? Ben spent way too much time with Linda and it was becoming bothersome.

People always came up to me and they would say things like I saw Ben with Linda…Ben and Linda are in one classroom now…are you sure those two don’t still kiss?…are you sure they are not making a fool out of you? Some other people were like tell that girl to stay away from your man.

I got pretty hurt the day a boy walked up to me and said they are making a big fool out of you and you are just blind. He said it like he knew something or he saw something.

I knew there was no smoke without fire but Ben had already told me that he and Linda were just friends and I choose to believe him.

I choose to trust him but all the rumors that flew into my ears each day shook my trust. Maybe it was my fault.

I remember the day Ben asked me what I wanted. He told me if I wanted him to stay away from Linda, he would. I recall I told him that if being her friend made him happy then he shouldn’t stop being her friend.

I suddenly felt regret. I wished I had told him from the beginning to stay away from her but that would make me a selfish person and love as I believed was about giving and sacrificing rather than taking.

That evening I was with him and I told him to stop being too close to Linda. I told him it was fine with me that they were friends but I wasn’t comfortable with him spending too much time with her or being seen with her all the time in the campus.

I told him it was hurting me and I began crying. I felt bad that I had to go through stings of jealousy every day and more so that I had to be cool with it. He pleaded with me to stop crying and promised he was going to do something about my complaints.

I walked outside that night with the intention of breaking up with Ben. I was tired of the relationship. I was tired of the rumors and I hated that he did nothing about it.

I wanted him to be a man and stand his ground but it seemed like he couldn’t break free from the shackles of Linda. He claimed he felt no love for her when I asked which left me wondering what the binding factor was. Was she blackmailing him? Or was he just lying to me?

‘I need to talk to you.’ I said to him that night.

‘Wow. This sounds like the preamble to a break up.’ His face immediately changed.

How did he know I came out to break up with him? I lost courage. I couldn’t do it. I needed him because somehow he completed me in a way I know no other man will ever complete me.

I decided I was going to trust him even if it meant I trusted him blindly. I was going to learn how to deal with my jealousy of Linda and accept that she is a part of his life and I was aware that getting very busy was going to help.

I began investing more time into my studies. When I wasn’t studying, I was seeing movies on my laptop and when it was time to see Ben, I saw him.

I began to spend time with myself and know myself. It was a wonderful feeling. The feeling of confidence in who I was as in individual; not who I was as a girlfriend or a friend.

I was on my way back home when I got a text from Linda. She said she wanted us to be cool with each other because that was what Ben wanted. She told me I had nothing to worry about because she had nothing romantic to do with Ben. She also said she valued her friendship with Ben and didn’t want to lose it. I remember telling her it was okay and that we were cool.

Linda wore Ben’s T shirt to class that day. I knew it was Ben’s. I knew all his clothes and I could identify them wherever. I was angry because she wore his T shirt. I was angry because he gave her his T shirt and not me. After class, I texted him;
Your best friend looks good in your t shirt. Make sure you have lunch.

Ben explained to me later that night that he had given Linda the T Shirt before he started dating me. He said he was surprised I noticed.

Not too long after, Ben gave me a T Shirt of his that he didn’t wear anymore. The T shirt was yellow and Ben hated it because of the color.

I was surprised when he gave me the t shirt. It made it look like a competition. I wore that t shirt once or twice in school and I knew Linda noticed.

                 *********************
I appreciate your time. Kindly consider leaving a vote or dropping a comment.