"Pilot, set coordinates for Naboo." I order, briefly watching stars pass the window over the pilot trooper's shoulder.

"Yes, ma'am." Is his grunted response. I click my tongue and turn on my heel, entering the belly of the ship where my two companions rest in isolation of each other. I glance at Lieutenant Avalon first, only to be met with a cold, hard glare. I clear my throat and avert my eyes, choosing to take the seat beside Sybil.

The ship shudders as we slip into hyperspace, and not one of us speak a single word in the 30 minutes it takes to reach my former home planet. When I feel the ship beginning to slow, I make a beeline for the cockpit to escape the tense, uncomfortable silence, only for tears to spring to my eyes as I once again gaze upon the planet of Naboo. The swaying, verdant treetops and hissing waterfalls over the lush mountainside where the palace, my former home, rest invoke an overwhelming sense of longing in me that I had not previously realized had been there. With the relief that entering Theed's atmosphere brings me comes the sickening realization that in my past few months with Ren, I had not expected to see it ever again.

"Prepare for landing." The pilot warns over the intercom, and I place my hand at the head of his seat, unable to bring myself to sit down in the name of safety if it means tearing my eyes away from our lowering into the city center. As we near the ground, I immediately recognize a decorated Queen Nikana Lei awaiting our arrival from the top of the grand steps, surrounded by her handmaidens, bowed and covered from notice in sapphire blue frocks. A smile begins to grow on my face, but I am jolted forward by a rude thump on the back of the shoulder.

"That doesn't look like remaining in character to me." Sybil grumbles, and our plan finds its place at the forefront of my mind once again. The ship lands in the brief moment that I had glanced away and I immediately lose my footing, only to be caught by my partner in crime with a roll of her eyes. I finally turn over my shoulder to face those in the belly of the ship. A handful of troopers and a severe Lieutenant Avalon watch the pair of us, waiting for instruction. Sybil swiftly places her mask over her head once again, then turns to me and nods. "We're ready, Commander Escara. We will follow your lead." She encourages through the voice modifier, with barely telligible feeling. She places what is meant to be a comforting hand on my forearm, but I understand the hidden warning lurking in the contact. The threat on my life made on the circumstance of Marco's death only a couple of hours before is echoing in my mind like a chilling mantra, and once she realizes her point has been communicated, she gives my arm one final squeeze before letting go.

The ship's inhabitants quickly clear out of the way as I march to the door, practicing the intimidation expected in the actions of a commander of the First Order by fixing each and every one of them with a cold stare. I stop just before the exit, swallowing my nerves down one last time, then step into the light where I am visible to all onlookers.

"It's showtime." Sybil whispers, and with that, we are marching down the stairs, towards the women who had been my sanctuary for six years.

I take the familiar steps with my shoulders straight and my head held high, fixing my face with my own version of the heightened sneer often adorning Hux's rat face. I glance only twice over the populace, acting as if I believe them beneath me, before clasping my hands at my stomach and stopping directly five feet in front of Nikana, one of my dearest friends, whose face is painted white, silvery-blonde tresses fixed in elaborate braids which hold her secretly-protective head piece in place. I pretend not to take notice of a grinning Sheva at her side. I smirk.

"Queen Lei. We meet again." I state simply, hoping she can't hear the way my heart pounds so loudly in my chest as I face her.

"It is a relief to see you here in front of me alive and well, Hale." She grins unexpectedly, and I force myself not to mirror her expression.

"I am to be addressed only as Commander Escara now, your majesty." I correct her, and her face falls for the briefest of moments before she is able to dissolve any feeling with her cool, queenly mask.

"Very well, Commander." She replies. We are both rooted to our spots, staring into each other's eyes, before Sybil breaks the tension from beside me.

"We have come to speak with you on the terms of our current agreement, your majesty." She implies, and I take notice of the way the new handmaidens, who had replaced each of my friends who were slaughtered at the ball which Sybil had originally spirited me away, flinch at her harsh, modified voice. Nikana nods once.

"Very well, Commander. Knight. If you would follow me." She turns too quickly on her heel, cape and large skirts billowing behind her. Sybil and I flank her on either side, and the handmaidens and troopers simultaneously fall into line behind us.

The huge, intricate palace doors yawn open before us, and as soon as they close behind the last of our small party, Nikana tenses as I take her elbow and steer our path away from the diplomatic relations chamber and towards the dormitories. As expected, the handmaidens draw their weapons from within their cloaks to defend their queen, but I remain unaffected.

"Don't follow us any further," I order the troopers over my shoulder, who stop immediately at my command, watching as our procession continues on without them.

As soon as we reach her sitting room and the last bristling handmaiden has slipped inside, I let the hiss shut and slowly face them all.

"What happened to you, Lyra? This isn't who you are." Nikana bursts, stalking forward with anger roiling from her now that she's escaped the public's eye.

"Li-"

"She's right. The Lyra I knew would've died before she gave herself to the dark side." Sheva hisses, appearing at her side, abruptly removing the hood that shields the upper half of her lovely face.

"If you would only listen to me," I growl, clenching and unclenching my fists in annoyance. Sheva's gaze fixes on the slight movement, while Nikana searches my face exasperatedly, but they remain silent.

"We don't have time to explain, but we need your help. Desperately." I start, letting my previously cold facade fade from my features. I glance between the pair of them. At my side, Sybil shifts on her feet.

Then, I tell them everything. I tell them of my months away, of Marco, of the First Order. I tell them of my correspondence with Leia and the Resistance.

I tell them of Ben. Every second of it I feel as if I'm being swallowed whole in a sarlacc pit, but it would be unfair to leave the biggest piece of my heart out of it. I blink three times to be sure my eyes won't turn watery, and I persist.

Finally, I tell them of the mission and how I had been forced into it.

When I'm finished, Nikana is squeezing my hand, and the relief at having my best friend at my side once again momentarily fills me with warmth.

"Tell us how we can help."

-

Later that night, as I lie cold in the bunk of the command ship, I stare blankly at the silvery wall. Unable to shut my eyes, let alone allow slumber to overtake me, I resolve to do one of the only things in the galaxy I know will always bring me comfort.

But as I reach out with the Force, searching tentatively at first, then more desperately, I am hit with a sobering realization, the feeling of emptiness gaping wide in my stomach.

The reassuring thump of Ren's heart at the back of my mind is glaringly missing, replaced by silence. We are so far apart now that no matter how urgently I reach for him in the dark, vast expanse of space, he could never feel me.

And I am completely and utterly alone.

-

i am BACK YALL

i realize it's been a long time since i've updated but it feels really good to be back :)

classes started again at the beginning of august and i started this semester with a brand new major so i've been working really hard to keep up with it all, but from now on i am also going to try really hard to keep up with updating this story, which is actually coming very soon! i already have the ending mapped out and am working on some minor details on the next story, even though i can only do so much considering i will be waiting for TROS before continuing!

anyway. i hope everything has been going good with all of you for the past couple months!

thank you so so so much, once again, for supporting this story! it means a lot! and make sure the vote, comment, and share so i can hear from you :)

-kait