We made our way back to where we'd left Brother Genitivi.

Enroute, Alistair took my arm and pulled me to the back of the group. "So all this time we've spent together... you know, the tragedy, the brushes with death, the constant battles with the whole Blight looming over us... will you miss it once it's over?"

I looked at him, a small smile starting to play on my lips. "Miss the constant battles? Or miss you?" I wouldn't miss the battles. When it was all over and we survived, I would miss Alistair something fierce. And for more reasons than because of our companionship and the fact we were the last Grey Wardens.

"I know it... might sound strange, considering we haven't known each other for very long, but I've come to... care for you. A great deal."

I stopped. Luckily, Alistair and I were at the back of the group. I really couldn't believe what he had just said. He was echoing my thoughts of the past few days. Was it possible?

"I think maybe it's because we've gone through so much together," He rubbed the back of his neck. "I don't know. Or maybe I'm imagining it. Maybe I'm fooling myself," He looked at me in a way he had never looked at me before, making my heart race. "Am I? Fooling myself? Or do you think you might ever... feel the same way about me?" The wondering I had been doing since shortly before beginning this quest for the Ashes had just been confirmed. A human could care deeply for an Elf. And I knew an Elf could love a human. Yes, I loved Alistair. I stopped trying to convince myself otherwise, it was only causing more confusion on my part.

"I think I already do," I said, softly.

He smiled. "So I fooled you, did I? Good to know." He bent down and kissed me. It didn't matter that we were surrounded by ice and snow in a ruined temple. I felt that the only thing keeping me on the ground was Alistair's lips pressed to mine, his arms pulling me close to him and my hands on those arms. I could have stayed there forever, forgetting the Blight, the Ashes, and everything but his warmth and scent.  He pulled away. "That... that wasn't too soon, was it?"

I smiled. "I don't know. I need more testing to be sure."

He grinned, breathless. "Well, I'll have to arrange that then, won't I? Maker's breath, but you're beautiful. I am a lucky man. Now, let's get back to... what we were up to before. Lest I forget why we're here."

We joined the others, who had met back up with Genitivi while Alistair and I were distracted.

"Where were you two?" Morrigan asked.

Wynne had a knowing look on her face. I hoped she wasn't going to call us out on it.

"Thought we saw movement and we went to check it out," Alistair said, saving me from having to make up something. "Just a fox."

"You were gone for quite some time," Genitivi said. "Well? Did you find it?"

I held up the pouch of Ashes.

"Is that... Oh, there is some dust on—no, that's not dust... Oh, Maker!... I am not worthy to look upon... What... what was it like? Coming to the Urn, I mean?"

"Nothing has touched me more deeply." My old emotional wounds had been opened. Although I'd been surprised at the faith I'd shown to a god I didn't even believe in. Maybe it was truly the Creators that had guided me, but something told me they didn't have a hand in it.

"You are a very fortunate person. And so am I. Perhaps my research will not seem so much like blasphemy to the Chantry now. I must return home. I have much to do. If you ever find yourself in Denerim, please visit me. I am not a rich man but I have a small collection of... interesting artifacts and I do owe you a reward for coming to my rescue. I hope to see you soon, my friend."

~~~

After seeing Genitivi off on his horse, along with a spare and provisions, we began our journey back to Redcliffe.

When we set up camp, Sten approached me. "The Blight. How will you end it?"

"We have to fight the Archdemon." I thought it had been obvious.

"Is that all? It is surrounded by an ocean of Darkspawn. How will you reach it? If you reach it, how will you slay it? You say you are a Grey Warden. I have stories of this Order."

"Wait, you doubt I'm really a Warden?" First it was my womanhood, now this?

"Great strategists and peerless warriors. That is what we hear of the Grey Wardens. So far, I am not impressed."

I glared at him and rose to my full height. I only stood at the bottom edge of his chest. Looking back, it probably looked pretty comical. "I'm not here to impress you."

"Evidently not. It remains only to see what you are here for." He walked off before I could respond to that.

I shook my head. First, he doubted I was a woman, now he doubted I was a Warden. I would never understand Sten.

"Sten trying to rile you up again?" Alistair asked.

"He's an odd one," I replied.

"Indeed."

"Alistair, I need to tell you something. About my recruitment." I felt like I owed him an explanation for The Guardian's question and the spirit I'd spoken to.

"I'm listening."

"But first, what did Duncan tell you when he sent word that I was coming?"

"He said he'd found a promising recruit among the Dalish named Realin and he would arrive in a few weeks to complete the Joining with the others. I was actually surprised that you were a woman. He'd never mentioned your gender."

"And no details?"

"No. What's on your mind?"

I sat next to the fire and he followed. "Tamlen was my best friend. We'd grown up together and did everything together. We were hunting and found some Sh... some humans who had ventured too close to camp." I didn't want to have to explain to him what a Shemlen was right now. "They told us about a cave they'd found and, after we ran them off, Tamlen and I went to check it out. It was human ruins but with Elven artifacts. We found nothing save spiders, strange creatures and walking corpses." I bit my lip. It was painful still to speak of Tamlen. "The feeling in that place was heavy. Like we shouldn't have been there. We found a mirror and despite my warnings, Tamlen touched it. I woke up two days later back at camp."

"What happened?"

"Tamlen released something with his touch. Duncan found me outside of the cave, but didn't know Tamlen had been with me. Merrill, the Keeper's First... her apprentice... and I went back to look for Tamlen, but we never found him. Only Darkspawn and Duncan. Duncan was impressed that I was even walking around, let alone fighting Darkspawn."

"Why?" His curiosity showed on his face. It was obvious he didn't know the story, although I was sure he suspected what I was going to say next.

"Because the mirror was tainted and Tamlen's touch released it and tainted us both."

Alistair blinked. With what I knew now about the Wardens' abilities, I was sure he'd sensed the taint within me. "What?"

"Yes, I was a tainted creature when we met. Joining the Grey Wardens was what would keep me from dying a slow, agonizing death. That episode I had in the Wilds was a product of the taint, not the emissary's magic, like I let you believe."

"What happened to Tamlen?"

"We never found him. I had been aided by the Keeper's healing magic and my own sheer will to survive. It's how I was able to survive long enough to do the Joining. Tamlen was unaided. I only hope his death was quick."

"Is that why the Guardian asked if you thought you failed him?"

"Yes. In a way, I do but I also don't. I could have pulled him away from the mirror, insisted that we continue the search. But Tamlen had touched the mirror after my warnings." I still felt guilty, but it was both our ideas to go into the cave. Curiosity killed the Dalish. Literally.

"I'm sorry." His voice told me he truly was.

"But if he hadn't touched the mirror and I hadn't become tainted, I would never have met you and discovered how wrong my people are about some humans." I placed my hand on his cheek and leaned close to him. Before the mirror incident I would never have considered being this close to a human.

Alistair understood my intention. "Who am I to refuse you?" He said with a smile and closed the gap between us, laying a soft kiss upon my lips. "Are we going to be making a habit of this?"

"We'll see," I said with a wink.

The former Templar's cheeks flushed.

Leliana approached the fire where I was sitting after Alistair went to wash the bowls from the evening meal. I still thought her strange but she was turning into a treasured friend. After she regaled me with another quite hilarious story about a noble and the mess live songbirds did to her hair, we ended up having a conversation about shoes and hair. "It's just that I... I feel so comfortable talking to you, like I could say anything and you wouldn't judge me," she said after we finished talking about why I kept my hair the way I did.

"Well, we are friends, aren't we?" I said with a smile.

She returned the smile. "Yes, very much so. I haven't felt this close to anyone in a long time. I really enjoy your company."

"You are a treasured friend, Lethallan." And she was. She knew I didn't worship the Maker and even though she was a Sister, she respected my views and I respected hers.

"What does that mean?"

"It is what we call those close to us. Close friends and clansmen."

Leliana smiled. "Thank you. I am honored you feel that way." She reached into her pack and pulled out a pair of boots. "The assassin we picked up may like these. I believe they're Antivan leather. It would be a motion of trust and friendship if you were the one to give them to him." She had a point. "I found them in the shop where we found the Redcliffe knight."

"That is a wonderful idea, Leliana." I walked over to Zevran. "I have something for you," I said and handed him the boots.

He inhaled. "Hmmm. That smell... this is Antivan leather, isn't it? I would know that anywhere! I don't know how you knew I was missing my homeland, but this does the trick nicely. Thank you."

"You're quite welcome."

"Now if only you could find me a prostitute or two, a bowl of fish chowder, and a corrupt politician, I'd really feel like I was home!" He laughed as he put the boots on. "And they fit, as well! Marvelous!" He went over to his tent and I returned to the fire and sat next to Alistair.

"Could I ask you something?" I asked.

"Sure." It was something curious actually and I had been wondering since our kiss in the temple. "If you were raised in the Chantry, have you never...?" I was sure he'd get my meaning.

"Never...? Never what? Had a good pair of shoes?"

"You know what I mean." I knew he wasn't as thick as he pretended to be.

"I'm not sure I do. Have I never seen a basilisk? Ate jellied ham? Have I never licked a lamppost in winter?"

I feigned a pout and hurt feelings. "Now you're making fun of me."

"Make fun of you, dear lady? Perish the thought. Well, tell me have you ever licked a lamppost in winter?"

I had literally attempted to. Tamlen had dared me to. I ended up getting my tongue stuck to it and I didn't talk to Tamlen for weeks. I did get him back by succeeding in licking the lamppost, although I cheated to do so. He only got his tongue stuck and I laughed so hard. But I had my payback. Of course, with Alistair, there was no telling what he meant. "Why yes, I've licked a lamppost in winter."

"Just the once? And you didn't lose half your tongue in the process? I'm impressed." He laughed. "I, myself, have never had the pleasure. Not that I haven't thought about it, of course, but... you know."

"You've never had the opportunity?"

"Well, living in the Chantry is..." He added another stick to the fire. "Not exactly the life for rambunctious boys. They taught me to be a gentleman, especially in the presence of beautiful women such as yourself. That's not so bad, is it?" This was the second time he'd called me beautiful. Did he really think that?

"You think I'm beautiful?" I asked.

"Of course, you are and you know it. You're ravishing, resourceful and all those other things you'd probably hurt me for not saying."

I smiled. "You flatter me."

"That's what I'm here for. It's a tough job, but somebody has to do it."

I laughed.

"But we should retire for the night, lest your risqué talk make my ears blush."

~~~

As we packed up camp the next morning, I heard Tristan growl. I turned and saw Sten kneeling in front of him. Sten gave an angry snarl. I stopped, watching the spectacle. Tristan gave a vicious growl.

"What are they doing?" Alistair asked. "Having a growling contest?"

"Looks like it."

Sten gave a loud roar.

"I think I officially will never understand the Qunari."

Tristan barked fiercely and lunged at Sten, snapping at him.

"You are a true warrior and worthy of respect," Sten said.

Tristan barked.

"Was he testing your dog?"

I shook my head. "Mythal, help us."

Sten stood as if that was nothing strange.

~~~

We found a group of Darkspawn who immediately set upon us. Zevran proved himself again by killing one who had gotten behind me. His blades spun in a blur as he went and saved Alistair's behind. Sten's sword swung in a wide arc, taking three Darkspawn at once. Morrigan and Wynne let bolts of energy or fire at the Darkspawn as they attempted to come for them. Soon they all lay dead.

"Wardens: One. Darkspawn: Zero," Zevran said.

Leliana chuckled. I had to smile and I saw Alistair shake his head.

"Let's go before we attract any more," I said.

We returned to our journey. We had only gone a few yards when I heard a thump behind me. I turned and saw Wynne on the ground. I ran back to her as she stood. She must have seen the concern.

"Uhh... I... fell...," she said.

"Are you alright?"

"For a moment there I thought I was... I thought it was all over..."

"You need rest, that's all." I was sure her magic drew a lot from her as old as she was and the fact that she played the healer of our group I was sure that, too, drew from her.

"I... I will explain everything when we make camp. Now is not the time."

I nodded. I understood. She wasn't ready to share. But we needed to get back to Redcliffe. We didn't know how long Arl Eamon had.