We joined the First Enchanter and his Mages, who had managed to get to Redcliffe before us. Jowan was standing next to Irving, looking a bit on the uneasy side.

"Ah, there you are," Irving said. "We have brought lyrium and begun preparations for the ritual. We can start anytime."

"So only one person can go through?" I asked.

"Yes. We haven't sufficient lyrium at present to send more than one Mage into the Fade."

"Then let's do this now."

"I'm glad we decided to take this route," Alistair said. "This really is the best option."

"Very well," Irving said. "Who shall go into the Fade?"

Morrigan and Wynne had been trapped in the Fade for Creators know how long. And Jowan kept saying he wanted to redeem himself...

"Jowan will go."

A look of complete shock came over the Blood Mage's face. "What? Me? Are you sure?"

"What?" Alistair said behind me at the same time.

"Loose a Blood Mage into the Fade to meet a demon?" Irving asked in disbelief. "What if he takes control of it?"

"Jowen has yet to deceive us. It was he who suggested that someone enter the Fade to kill the demon to begin with. And this is his chance to redeem himself."

Irving narrowed his eyes at me. I held my ground, knowing he was leveling that look at me in an effort to get me to choose someone else. At least he didn't have Marethari's Disapproving Frown of Doom. "You trust too much and too quickly but I shall do as you ask."

That wasn't true. Jowan seemed like he was desperate to atone for his sins. Who was I to deny him a second chance?

"I'll... do my best. I promise," Jowan said, giving me a grateful look. But I saw fear in his eyes at knowing he would be the one to face the demon.

~~~

Jowan seemed nervous as he prepared to enter the Fade. He looked at me then at Isolde as if to remind him why he was doing this. "I will not let you down," he said.

"I'll hold you to that." I think he knew if he tried to deceive us now that I wouldn't hesitate to kill him. He took a deep breath before stepping forward. He took a handful of lyrium and then collapsed.

"Is that normal?" I asked. I'd never seen any of the rituals Mages did, even in my clan.

"Yes," Irving said. "Now we wait."

We all kept an eye on Jowan's form. Isolde rocked back and forth praying. Leliana prayed with her, their hands clasped together. I stole a glance at Alistair. He was absently biting his lip and I knew he would grasp the power of the lyrium he carried at a moment's notice if Jowan betrayed us. Morrigan looked bored. I never could read Sten. Tristan slept as only a dog could. Wynne watched Jowan intently. It felt as if strings were holding us all up, the tension was so thick. Finally, after what seemed like centuries, Jowan awoke. He seemed exhausted.

"It is done," he said, weakly. "She was a Desire Demon. She was powerful but she is dead. The boy is free." And then he passed out from the exhaustion I was sure that came with fighting a demon.

~~~

The nightmare the people of Redcliffe had endured was over. They set about burning their dead, sending them off into small boats and alighting them when they were a certain distance. I had never seen a funeral such as this. It was odd to see the Shem burn their dead instead of burying them. But Shemlen customs were not Dalish customs. I would have to ask Alistair about it later. We had saved all that we could but the village was less populated now. Afterward, Teagan and Isolde invited Alistair and I to see the Arl. Eamon lay on the bed, unmoving.

"So it is over," Teagan said. He looked over at Conner, who was looking at a bookcase, and then broke into a run out of the room. "Conner is his old self. He does not seem to remember anything, which is a blessing. I suppose we'll need to send him to the Circle of Magi's Tower for... training. Once the war is over. It's so odd to think of the boy as a Mage, of all things. Eamon has much to mourn and rebuild, should he recover. But at least he can be thankful that both his son and wife are safe."

"I owe you my deepest thanks," Isolde said. "I had nearly..." She couldn't finish her sentence, thus she changed the subject. "I can scarcely believe Conner is the boy he once was."

"There is still the matter of Jowan. You trusted him and he saved Conner's life. I am unsure of what to make of that. We will hold him for Eamon to decide his fate. If he doesn't recover then his fate is sealed. What do you think?" Why was everyone always asking me my opinion on their matters?

"Why do you want my opinion?" I wasn't a great lady. Or a Keeper. I was just a Hunter and a Grey Warden.

"You spoke with him, have you not?" Teagan said. "You know what he has done better than I, even." Aside from fleeing the Circle for being a Blood Mage and poisoning Eamon, I knew nothing about what he'd done previously.

"Could you find him useful?"

"I would not trust him but I would not presume to tell my brother what to do."

"My opinion is he has proven himself worth redeeming. Perhaps releasing him?"

"Release him?" Isolde asked. "Are you mad? Why would you do such a thing?"

"I agree with Isolde. He is a Maleficer. We cannot simply unleash him on the land and ignore his crimes."

"You asked my opinion. And don't forget that he risked his life to save Conner."

Teagan and Isolde shared a look. "Perhaps you are correct," Teagan said. "But that is Eamon's decision, not mine. I am sorry but Jowan stays in the dungeon for now."

"Fair enough."

"Our task is not yet done. Whatever the demon did to my brother, it seems to have spared his life but he remains comatose. We cannot wake him."

"The Urn!" Isolde cried, turning around to look at her husband. "The Urn of Sacred Ashes will save Eamon!"

"Then I will seek out this Urn," I offered.

She turned back to me, tears rimming her eyes. "Thank you. I am grateful for your eagerness to restore my husband." I needed Eamon. Without him, according to Alistair, he and I, as Grey Wardens, stood no chance against Loghain. And I wasn't doing this for her. I was doing it for Alistair. "Find Brother Genitivi, the scholar, in Denerim. He has been researching the Urn's location for several years now. The knights that returned say they were unable to find Genitivi but perhaps the Maker will lead you to him."

"I must go to the hall and begin rebuilding. I wish you luck and may the Maker go with you." Teagan left the room.

"Rest within the castle before you start your journey," Isolde said. "But begin as soon as you can." She returned to Eamon's side.

"We will take a day's rest then we shall be on our way," I said.

"Thank you," Alistair whispered as we left the room. I looked at him questioningly.

"For what?" I asked.

"For everything."

~~~

We made the most of our rest. Wynne had gone to the library to read. I was sure Morrigan was studying more of her mother's grimoire. I had no idea where Sten was, but my guess would be in the courtyard sparring or showing the militia the proper way to hold their swords. Alistair, Tristan, and Leliana were around the castle somewhere. I was leaning against a desk in what I was pretty sure was the study. Shelves of books lined the walls and books, papers and inkpots littered the desk. Many thoughts were going through my mind. Could we find the Urn? So many of Redcliffe's knights had failed. Granted, we were becoming good at impossible tasks, but this? The Urn was a legend. Even we Dalish had heard of the Urn and its powers. We would start at Denerim, the only clue we had, but afterward? Conner's laugh brought me out of my thoughts. I looked up to see Tristan run past the doorway, followed by Conner. I smiled.

"Hey!" I heard Alistair cry, followed by a thump. Obviously, Tristan had tackled Alistair. Leliana and Conner's laughter drifted down the hall. "You mutt!"

Tristan barked. I pushed off the desk and knocked something off. I turned and looked down and saw a piece of thick cloth with a cord hanging out of it. I crouched down and picked it up, moving aside the cloth. In my hands was an amulet. It was silver and had a flame adorning it. I knew it as Andraste's holy symbol, Leliana had the same symbol on her robes when we first met. And I had learned that from Duncan and Leliana. I realized I was holding Alistair's mother's amulet. The very one that he said he had shattered against the wall. This had to be it. I examined it closely and saw that it looked like it had been repaired. I carefully rewrapped it and put it in my hip pack to wait for the perfect time to give it to Alistair. I walked into the hall to see Alistair and Tristan on the floor wrestling. I laughed as I leaned against the wall and watched them. Alistair had shed his armor and was only wearing a shirt and pants. I watched them roll around. My thoughts strayed to my fellow Grey Warden. We had been through much since we met. The battle of Ostagar, defending Redcliffe, the Tower. Events that had brought us closer together as friends. But I felt some other connection to Alistair. Could I? I had been raised hearing about the Shemlens' evil. How all of them looked down upon us. How they thought they were better than us. Since I had left my clan, those beliefs had been proven wrong several times. Could my people have been wrong about the Shemlen? Alistair never once looked down on me because I was a Dalish. He saw me on even footing. To him, I was a fellow Grey Warden. He had even thrust me into the leadership position. There had been the occasional Dalish joke, of course, but he was the least serious warrior I had ever met. I was pretty sure all Alistair saw was a woman who could hold her own. It had even took him a bit when we first met to even realize I was Dalish. Tamlen's death had left a hole I didn't think would ever be filled. Alistair was filling that hole and I didn't know what to make of it. Could a Shem really feel a deep friendship with a Dalish? I couldn't understand the feelings I was having towards him.

Conner ran over and grabbed my hand, breaking my train of thought. I let him lead me over to the wrestle fest. Tristan jumped on me and licked my face, then pushed me down to where I was on my back with my dog on top of me. Alistair decided to join in and we ended up having our own wrestle fest. Tristan barked and joined the fray. Leilana thought the whole thing funny and had to sit she was laughing so hard. Alistair almost pinned me down but I managed to free an arm and playfully hit his chest. This was the closest we'd been to each other and the pain in my heart had turned to something else I just couldn't place, even with the memories of the wrestling matches I'd had with Tamlen, Fenarel, and Merrill. Conner came to my rescue then, jumping on Alistair's back.

"Hey! No fair!"

As we horse played, I could, if only for a moment, forget I was a Grey Warden and an Elf. I was just another person goofing around with friends.