I know a double update what is this???
I just love you guys
And I couldn't resist

Charlie POV

The smell of burnt cookies and smoke filled the kitchen.

What did I just do?

My phones buzzes momentarily. I had a glimmer of hope. Thinking that Mackenzie is ringing me back.

It's Jess

That's right. My girlfriend. Jess.

I take a deep breath

"Hey, babe, what's up," I say in the most normal voice possible hoping she can't tell something is definitely wrong. Through I could feel my voice breaking.

"Not much. I just wanted to check up on you. You've been very out of it this week and I just got a bit worried" guilt washed over me as I realise that I've been ignoring her this week.

I sigh "I've just got a slight cold so I haven't been feeling the best. I think we might need to call off date night tonight if that's okay. I just don't want you to get sick from me"

"Are you sure? I can come around with some food and we can stay in and watch a movie if you want to take it easy" I can hear the disappointment in her voice

"I think I want to rest but I'll make it up to you tomorrow kay?"

"Yeah okay. Love you" she says quietly into the phone.

"Love you too" I reply quickly

When she hangs up. I bury my head in my arms and take a deep breath.

I 100% I'm digging myself into a deeper hole.

I should have told her when she was right there in front of me.

I should have told her how I felt

When I thought she was panicking I kissed her without thinking. I had heard my sister and her friend talk about how a kiss could help a panic attack.
I probably shouldn't listen to her anymore

Maybe I kissed her because I was panicking as well.

Maybe I kissed her because I've wanted to for the last 5 years.

I seriously need to get myself in check

If I don't

I am so screwed