11) How to Survive Paintball aka Hide!

Some motivational quotes that you may hear often might include:

Practice makes perfect

Dream. Believe. Succeed

Persevere and Conquer

Success follows effort

These encouraging phrases are meant to push you to strive for your dreams. To help you endure through hard times that life may throw at you.

But they most importantly make sure you don't procrastinate.

Procrastinating can have many meanings: to avoid or postpone what needs to be done, to distract yourself with something meaningless or in my case run away from things you should be doing. I think it's called something like responsibility.

Let me start by just saying that I have, in fact, been practising shooting with a nerf gun around the house.

And before you even ask, yes. I did break stuff. But not on purpose.

So it was decided for the benefit of both mine and our antique plate collection, that the safest thing I could do (which didn't involve hitting an actual target but still technically practising) was to play video games.

I wasn't going to argue with that.

I also picked up some multitasking skills in my pursuit of learning how to aim a gun.

I can now successfully play the x-box and do homework while watching a YouTube video on how not to die while playing paintball.

Sadly my habit of losing things has not diminished in the past 17 years.

"Stupid sock goblins," I grunt while going through my sock drawer "how about taking socks that I don't wear anymore. I'll even donate them to your sock cult or whatever you use them for."

Giving up I put on a mismatched pair of striped and polka-dot socks.

My phone surprises me by going off twice. I'm definitely feeling popular today.

Zoeeeeee: Hey chicka. Good luck today. Don't get killed Okay, I need someone to make me cupcakes xo

I think that's as much encouragement as I'm going to get from anyone today, so I'll take it.

My heart skips a beat when I see Aaron has messaged me.

Aaron: I know its l8 notice but I won't be able 2 pick u up 2day. Cars full so u wont be able 2 fit in. C u there.

Sighing, I contemplate if I should write him an essay on how to type a full word or why 'late notice' is not a proper excuse.

Me: All good. I'll just get Charlie to give me a lift

I grab a spare change of clothes and chuck them in my bag while dialling Charlie.

After putting my phone on speaker I throw it on my bed as I try to find a suitable pair of shoes.

He picks up after the second dial tone.

"Hey, Charlie. My best friend. My pal. BFFL. Most amazing-"

He cuts me off "As nice as it is to hear you greet me like that. What do you want? Did you kill someone? Wait, don't answer that question."

Lacing my shoe up I pick up my phone "Are you serious? I would clearly ask Zoe to help me hide a body. You can't handle the sight of blood. Remember when I had a nose bleed and you fainted?" Charlie went silent "Anyway, that's not the point," I shake my head trying to clear my mind "I was seeing-"

"No, I can't give you a lift to paintball. But don't worry; I've already called one of the guys to pick you up. He should be at your house any minute."

Honk honk.

I hear the sound of a car horn.
"You're a lifesaver Ch-"

"Don't thank me just yet."

Did he just give my address to a random guy? This guy could be a serial killer for all I know. Or even worse; a guy that doesn't know what deodorant is.

I run towards an unfamiliar car and look through the window to see a beaming Lee waving at me and a very annoyed looking Sam sitting in the driver's seat. He could easily give grumpy cat a run for its money.

On second thought a serial killer would have been better.

"No," is the first thing that leaves my mouth as I stand out the front of the car "Charlie, I seriously don't know what in the world made you think this was a good idea," I scold.

Sam's doesn't even look at me when he grumbles "Get in."

Flicking my head back to the two idiots in the car I shake my head in protest, "Would you like to hear it in another language? NO!"

"I hate you Charlie when I-"

beep beep beep

You're kidding me.

"He hung up on me. He is so dead, " I say in a low voice.
I open the back door reluctantly.

"Just so you know I'm only getting in the car so I can beat Charlie to a pulp when we get to the paintball place."

Lee turns around towards me and flashes a million-dollar smile "And here I thought you just wanted to see me."

"On second thought I'll just walk there," I reach for the handle and try to open the door.
Keyword try.
He locked the doors.
He's probably going to murder me then dump me into a river.

"You're not going anywhere. I owe Charlie a favour so I said I could pick you up. You don't get a say in this," he states as the car starts speeding down the street.

"I'm starting to think that your face is in a permanent scowl." I murmur under my breath while struggling to find the seat belt "And by the way, last time you 'owed' Charlie a favour you ended up leaving me to fend for myself when the fire alarm was going off. That wasn't very chivalrous of you, was it Sammy?"

Sam looks at me through the rearview mirror "I dare you to call me that again."

"And what exactly will you do to me, Sammy?"  I say in an innocent voice.

"That's for me to know and you not to find out till it's too late. You better watch your back because one shot is all it takes."

He sounds so cliché and melodramatic. Next thing I know he will be wearing a hat with a giant feather while reciting Shakespeare. No wonder the girls fall for his bad-boy act "Pft. An empty threat from an equally empty person. I was thinking about going easy on you but now you will meet your doom."

Wow, Mackenzie. You must really have him shaking in his boots now.

"Actually," Lee turns back around while adjusting his long sleeves "he is the reigning paintball champion with a 1.4 accuracy level and a kill score that, will- " Lee says like something I should be impressed about.

"I have no idea what you're blabbing on about because all of that means nothing to me. You know what, I bet I could easily shoot you without even being noticed."

Both boys erupt in laughter "Hahahaha. Like that would ever happen. You'll be shot within the first minute."

I shuffle forward in my seat, suddenly intrigued by the conversation.

"How about we make this interesting. If I shoot you first you buy me lunch for a week, and not that terrible cheap stuff for 7/11 or convenience stores. I'm talking sushi, hot chicken nuggets or Chinese food."

He raises his eyebrows in surprise "And if I shoot you I get 3 favours from you. You do whatever I say or ask for."

Lee hits his friend on the arm "Dude, she's not a genie. How about one favour for Sam and a snack for Mace, you guys need to learn to keep it simple," I shrug at his suggestion while Sam nods his head "Good to see you two agree on something for once. Now you can either spit shake on it or we can do like a blood oath thing."

"LEE!" Sam and I both exclaim. Maybe Lee is the one that needs to walk there.

***

When we pull up to the paintball place. I can't find Charlie anywhere which leaves me to conclude that he is hiding from me.

Wise choice.

Before I can even scout the area for food, Aaron grabs me by the arm and pulls me towards the starting line.

A bald guy whose hair has obviously migrated from his head to his face stood in front of us.

His voice bounces off the walls to make it seem like he is shouting at us "You've been split into two teams. You both have a safe house and a flag to protect. Now I don't want to see any dirty play out there. We don't need to ring the ambulance like last time?"

I look at Aaron with widened eyes "Ambulance?" I squeak.

He slowly nods "Yeah last time Sam and another guy were full-on battling it out. The guy ended up tripping over something and snapping his ankle. Nobody knows if it was an accident or not."

I involuntary gulp. What have I gotten myself into?

So right now I'm awkwardly standing squished at the back of the tiny shed with a bunch of guys that sadly do not smell of cologne. It's not exactly the way I thought I'd be spending my Saturday.

I waddle up next to Charlie who I'm very tempted to injure severely. He looks at me first with surprise then takes a subtle step away from me "I'm actually surprised you haven't wrapped yourself in bubble wrap yet or at least put on some extra layers."

"I'm perfectly capable of protecting myself thank you very much. Plus I've already got a game plan" he raises an eyebrow in disbelief "I'm either going to hide behind a really tall person, hide in the bushes than pounce on people or climb a tree and stay there until the end."

"That's umm-"

I wink "Smart. I know"

"So our plan is offence and defence." Aaron raises his voice as he points to the two separate groups "Half of us are going to go around the outside perimeter and then come into the centre while the others will go from the centre and spread outwards. Either way, they will be trapped and will have nowhere to run."

Throughout his tactic speech, he somehow fails to mention what exactly I'll be doing.

As I raise my hand all eyes turn to me "What about me?" I ask, trying to adjust my helmet that is too large for my head.

"You go long," he says with confidence which confuses me even more. Does he know what he's doing? Going long is the worst set of instructions I've ever heard.

"Wait, w-" Before I can even intervene to question them more about what I'm supposed to be doing again, Troy shouts a battle cry.

"Let us go man," He yells, raising his gun "and not let a single human being be left standing. Let's go shoot them and leave them bleeding with tears coming out of their noses."

That definitely wasn't the most motivational speech. Maybe if he added some HSM quotes like 'we're all in this together' or 'getcha head in the game' people would be more excited.

"BLUE FOR VICTORY. BLUE FOR FREEDOM. BLUE FOR Umm LET'S KICK THE RED TEAMS BUTT"

The group of testosterone-filled males run out of the small shack in cries of vengeance, freedom and hunger.

Okay, so the last one was me.

And I didn't precisely run either. It was more like a between a scurry and waddle.

I hear the screams and shouts before I see the paint massacre that was coming towards me.

Following my natural instincts of survival aka I-don't-really-care-if-anyone-dies-I-just-want-to-get-home-because-there-is-Thai-for-dinner. I dive for cover in the nearest large bush that didn't look like it was going to scratch me or leave me itchy. This was a bad idea. I'm pretty sure that the bush is about to come alive and rip me limb from limb.

Looking out into the open space I see over half of my team laying flat on the ground. Maybe they're sunbaking or playing dead to deceive the other team so they can ambush them.

A group of guys with different coloured tags start to stalk in my direction.

This would be a really nice time for my team to stand up and shoot or even some kind of movement would be a nice sign of them being alive.

Yep, I'm definitely going to be shot in the next 30 seconds.

Gathering all the courage I can conger up. I decide to do the most heroic thing I'm probably ever going to do in my life.

I run.

With determination and complete fear pumping through my veins, I sprint towards the guys my age (who are most chance-taking steroids and are going to kill me very soon) and start firing my gun.

This is when I need some awesome backtrack playing while I wave my paint gun in various directions hoping that it might hit something. Or at the very least distract them long enough for me to run away to somewhere safer.

As I pull the trigger down I start to realise that I'm not being shot at. Which means, surprisingly my plan actually worked.

But because I'm so caught up in my mini victory I seem to miss something very big.
This being a giant tree.

So like any normal person who is doing a victory dance in their head and forget where they're going. I run straight into the tree and land on my back with a crack.

Just a stick, not a bone thankfully.

A deep chuckle comes from a metre away.

"Look what we've got here. Seems like the universe is on my side today doesn't it?" Sam stands to overshadow me.
I'm in exceedingly too much pain to move so in stay lying on the lumpy dirt.

"It's like you're not even trying," his smirk alone tells me I won't be hearing the end of this for a while "you could have at least given me a challenge."

He gets his gun and aims it at my head. "Any last words?"

As I look up at the smug male standing before me. An odd thing happens. I start to laugh.

This definitely throws him off "Go ahead, Sam. Shoot me while I'm down . Shoot a girl who has just fallen over and has probably bruised every bone in her body," at least it feels that way. "It's funny. I would have thought you were better than this. That you were maybe a semi-decent human being with a soul. I guess you're still full of surprises aren't you Sammy."

Sam has a blank expression on his face with no emotion. He shakes his head and starts to walk away.
I should do that more often if it makes him leave me alone.

As I lift my gun to shoot him, he swivels around and shoots me straight in the face.
The paint covers my helmet so I can't see where I'm shooting when I pull the trigger.

Sadly I don't hear any groans of pain but what I do hear is Sam's voice drifting further away
"The universe may not always play fair, but at least it's got a great of a sense of humour"

That guy is such a mystery.

The only thing I know is that I want payback.

Because right now, all I see is red

Cupcake Theory #11
When someone that cares about you suggests you don't do something dangerous, listen to them. If not just wrap yourself excessively in bubble wrap.

:):):)

So hi there

This week has felt likes it's stretched on forever.
I've finished my chemistry test (yay)
You know what was even better? My interest stopped working for two days. Which also meant it deleted half the chapter #happydays

But everything is all good in the end.
Except probably my spelling. If you see any mistakes or something doesn't make sense feel free to point it out. It will be appreciated greatly.

If you're feeling in a good mood can even like, vote, comment, share, reblog or whatever the cool kids do these days

I just wanted to remind you of how amazing you are and to remind you that you are immensely loved

I hope you don't run into any trees this week

Lots of bubble wrap
Theforgottonone ¡!