ALL CHARACTERS AND EVENTS IN THIS FANFICTION -- EVEN THOSE BASED ON REAL CHARACTERS IN THE SHOW -- ARE ENTIRELY FROM THE MIND OF A YAOI FANGIRL. ALL CHARATCERS ARE PORTRAYED.....POORLY. THE FOLLOWING ONESHOT CONTAINS COARSE LANGUAGE AND DUE TO ITS CONTENT IT SHOULD NOT BE READ BY ANYONE.

Xxx

Tweek... I can't get that stupid spaz out of my mind lately! His blonde little head. It's just suck in my head. It won't go away. The Asian girls refer to us as 'Creek', Craig x Tweek, and the name is pretty fitting. My heart used to have this strong barrier around it. That I wouldn't let people into. But lately, it's getting old, it's breaking, rusting, creaking. Coffee's slowly seeping into it. I want to, I want to tell him how I really feel. That I don't want this relationship to be fake anymore. I'm pretty sure he doesn't either and that the whole thing is probably really stressing him out. That's what makes the situation so much worse.

I'm just really shit at communication. I don't like talking about my feelings. Just thinking of the word makes me shiver. My two moods are bored or enraged. And sure, there are difference shades of those two, but there are certain emotions that I'd just never show. Like if Tweek is being adorable, which he often is, I'd never say, 'oh my god Tweek! You are so cute!' and then proceed to roll around on the floor squealing. I'm not that kind of guy. Worryingly, I might sometimes think it in my head though. In reality the most that might happen is I'll tell him in a very monotone voice that he's being cute. That would make him a stuttering bright red mess. A very cute mess too. Ugh, I don't like having these, having these feelings. They won't go away. And worse, I can't express them.

Communication. That's what Super Craig's kryptonite is. I almost wrote Tweek. Thank God I didn't. Like I don't seem gay enough already. I'm being as lame as Clyde, I can actually feel the cringe. I audibly sigh.

Ever time I try to confess to him it goes a little something like this:

"Tweek, I need to tell you something." He'll turn around with a cute, little confused expression on his face.

"Yes Craig?"

"I, I," brief pause, "your shirt looks stupid let me fix it." Internally face palms. I think because I never show emotion I just genuinely don't know how to.

"C-CRAIG?! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! AH!" That scene ending with me rebuttoning Tweek's shirt, him almost having a heart attack and at least five people fainting from 'the feels'. I hate this town.

Or then there was this time,

"Hey Tweek?" Cue warm smile from adorable blonde.

"Yeah Craig?"

"I- er- um- you're a spaz." For some reason Tweek laughed instead of trying to murder me.

"Ge thanks. You're a dick yourself." He just squeezed my hand and we carried on walking." It's not that I'm scared to tell him how I feel. I think I genuinely am just physically incapable of doing it. Some kind of mental block.

I shake my head thinking about it. This has happened multiple other times as well. I groan internally. He's just so special to me. A lot of people think it's always me looking after him. And while I am the world's number one boyfriend, the truth is our relationship is very give and take. I think back to a couple months ago.

It was about 1:30 in the morning when I heard a knock on my door. Thinking it was my parents I didn't respond. I just sat on my bed hugging my knees wondering why my dick head of a boyfriend hadn't responded to my text. I always respond to him. In my head I hear Mr Mackey telling me that expectations lead to resentments but right now I don't care. He's as much of a butthole as my parents.

That's why I was so surprised when Tweek walked into my room and sat at the opposite end of the bed. Giving me some space.

"Hey Craig." He said quietly. He must have used the key to the house that my parents gave him. Our parents got into a bit of a war about who were the most supportive of their gay child. It was as stupid as it sounds. As a by product we now both have keys to the other's house.

"Tweek? What are you doing here." I said staring at my knees, refusing to look at him.

"You sent me a me a text saying 'hello' at 1 am. For one thing you always, always, say 'hi' because that requires the least effort. But what got me worried was you sent it at 1 am. Craig, you always go to bed at exactly 11. Unless you have a game or something. But you don't right now. What's wrong."

"Nothings wrong Tweek. You're being stupid. Go home." I said still refusing to look at him.

"Craig, how are you feeling?" Asked Tweek, completely ignoring me. I finally looked up to glare at him. Using my own words against me, who does he think he is? However, as soon as I looked at him I cracked. In a heartbeat I was hugging Tweek tightly. Burring my head into his shoulder. Tweek just let me hug him. Let m cling onto him like some desperate koala until I was ready to talk.

"I feel, I feel like shit Tweek." I eventually responded.

"Why?" He replied gently.

"Because my parents are fighting. You probably heard as you came up." They hadn't in a while. I guess that's why it hit me so hard.

"Why would that make you feel like shit Craig?"

"Because... because it's my fault." Tears started to well up in my eyes. Tweek took off my hat and started patting my hair gently.

"Why is it your fault?"

"Because I bother them. I'm a nuisance. If I wasn't there they'd have more time to focus on their problems." I said finally crying. When's the last time I even cried? Probably the first time I heard them fighting. That was years and years ago. Tweek moved my head and gently wiped away my tears with his sleeve. "I, I show too many emotions. If I was some kind of robot, they could love each other." I said feeling stupid. It's the truth though. This is largely why I'm so closed off and don't show much emotion.

"Craig, Craig please don't tell me you think that." Said Tweek, breaking out of therapist mode. I didn't respond. "Craig, you're not the one causing their problems. It's their  problems. You don't need to close yourself off. Go talk to them about this. Tell them how you feel." I still didn't respond. Tweek just looked angry and left the room. I guess he's had enough of my shit, like everyone else.

I only realised I was wrong when I heard him yelling at my parents. Shit. I quickly ran out my room, into the corridor and stood quietly next to the door of my parents room.

"No don't tell me to mind my own business! This is my business. I don't care what you're fighting about! You're stupid fights are upsetting my boyfriend! I don't know how long you guys have been fighting but Craig has been blaming himself the whole time and you need to go talk to him and tell him that's not true RIGHT NOW! Craig is amazing person, boyfriend, SON and he deserves to be appreciated!" Tweek yelled. He then walked out the room and slammed the door behind him. He then spotted me, half screamed and dragged me back to my room.

"Oh my God! C-Craig! What the hell did I just do! I'm a complete moron! They hate me now! It's just, I got your text, I was worried, so I asked Token and Clyde what they thought and Clyde said it meant the beginning of the apocalypse! And Token was all like you should go visit him so then I was really worried. And then I came to visit you and I just got so pissed off when were blaming yourself because it's totally not your fault! That's what you always tell me! And then I yelled at your parents! Now they hate me! They're going to get me Craig! They're gonna get me!" Ranted Tweek half hyperventilating. I just ended up laughing. Tweek stared at me incredulously.

"I'm still not entirely sure if it's my fault or not. But hearing you yell at my parents was hilarious. You're amazing babe. Head back to your house and go get some sleep okay? Thanks Tweek." I said patting his head gently.Tweek still looked like he was going to explode, but he smiled and walked out my room. This time out of the house. A couple minutes later my parents came in and said basically what Tweek had said. That it wasn't my fault. It was theirs. They said they were sorry, and that they loved me. There were lots of smiles and tears. Ruby even came in too. It was a very touching family moment. Naturally, we then all flipped each other off and headed to bed.

I shake myself back to the present. I feel like he can really understand me. And, and I want to tell him that. And so much more. I just don't really know how. Then something in my wardrobe caught my eye. I think I've finally got an idea.

Xxx

I walked out my house, ready to face the day. It was Craig's turn to pick me up, so I'd had a slightly longer morning. I looked around for the familiar blue and yellow chullo hat. But all I could see was a guy in really tight coral jeans, wearing an obnoxiously bright pink jacket with a white T shirt, adorded with a pink triangle, underneath. They had completely gelled down raven black hair, a blue feather boa and the most ridiculous looking pink glasses. At first, I thought it was a psychopath who had come to murder me.

They I realised the reality. It was much, much worse. "C-Craig?! What the hell are you doing?! The metrosexual fade died ages ago!" I yelled at him.

"I know," he said taking my hand, "I'm gay, this is just how I want to express myself now."

"What!? Craig, are you wearing eyeliner!" I said with genuine fear.

"Yeah, you got a problem with that? I'll tell PC Principal." He replied in his completely unfazed monotone voice, and just sassily flipped his feather boa over one shoulder.

At school the first person we bumped into was Kyle. "Oh God, am I going to have to murder some crab people again?" Asked Kyle, looking at me confused. 

"Gah! N-No, C-Craig's just trying on a new style..." I said trailing off.

"You got a problem with it Broflovski?" Said Craig with a glare, which was somehow still intimidating.

"No, as long as it's just you I'm totally happy." Said Kyle happily, walking with us towards out lockers. When we got their Cartman was standing in front of Craig's.

"Move I'm gay." Was all Craig said and just shoved Cartman to the side.

"Oh my God you guys, I knew this day would come, Craig's gone full homo." Cartman whisper yelled to Stan.

"You got a problem with that?" I said glaring at Cartman, deciding that whatever the fuck Craig was doing I would support him.

"Yeah! What if he infects us!" Said Cartman. Stan pinched his nose and Kyle kicked his shin, which seemed to shut him up after he'd cried a little.

At lunch Craig kissed my cheek after he said he was going to the bathroom. I went bright red. He kissed my cheek! He's never kissed me before! WHAT DOES THIS ALL MEAN!? Clyde was having a moment, while Token looked concerned.

"Is Craig okay?" Asked Token uncertainly. Clyde punched his arm.

"Don't be homophobic!"

"Ow! I'm not! This is just out of the blue is all I meant! I have no problem with Craig doing this. It just seems very... uncraig. Tweek, have you got any idea what's going on?" I just shook my head in response. What is going on.

Throughout the day Craig would kiss me on the cheek, hug me from behind and tell me he loves me! It was really starting to freak me out! Everyone else thought it was adorable. I, on the other hand, was terrified! Why is Craig doing this?! What the fuck is he doing?! Is this meant to please the Asian girls or something?! Have I missed something?!

Then it hit me. Craig is absolutely terrible at communication. So, he usually shows how he feels with actions. Like giving me his laptop with out me even asking when mine was broken. Or that time he gave me his swimming cap and googles so I wouldn't get in trouble and took the blame himself.

And what has he done today? He's explicitly stated he's gay, kissed me on the cheek and told me he loves me repeatedly. Oh my God he's such a dork.

I tapped Craig on the shoulder. "C-Craig, I love you too. Let's go out for real." Craig let out a sigh of relief and dramatically threw off his feather boa and glasses. Everyone around us looked very confused, apart from Kyle who seemed to understand what was going on. I think he was legitimately the only person to realise we were fake dating.

"Took you long enough. Do you know how uncomfortable that thing is?"

"It's not my fault you suck at communication!" I responded defensively.

"You suck Tweek."

"Yeah, well you swallow!" Everyone around us at this point was either very done or squealing. Craig just laughed.

"I love you babe."

"Love you too Craig."

"No Tweek, I don't think you get it. Like, I'm the personification of a middle finger right? And you're the personification of a cup of coffee. And if you give a pair of hands a cup of coffee, well they can't flip people off anymore. They're too preoccupied being warm and comforted. You, you break down my walls Tweek. You give me purpose." Tears started stinging my eyes.

"Damn it Craig, I thought you were meant to be bad at communication!"

"Well you see, there is nothing Craig can't do!" He said smiling. Is it possible to simultaneously love and hate someone?

"Did you seriously just refer to yourself on the third person?" I said unimpressed.

"Yes." And I didn't realise how close his lips were to mine until he kissed me after responding. When he finally pulled away, everyone was on the ground around us. I didn't even realise.

"C-Craig!? Are they all dead!" I said in a panic.

"No, just unconscious."

"Craig, I think this is how we can defeat North Korea!"

"What?" Craig responded, clearly both worried and unimpressed.

"We go over there and make them all faint!" I said happily.

"That, has got to be the stupidest thing I've ever heard." I shoved him playfully.

"You're always telling me to think of solutions to my problems! Well I found one." I said smiling.

"You are such a spaz. But if you asked me to go to North Korea with you, I would." I smiled and grabbed his hand and the two of us started walking home.

"To clarify I was joking, but it's nice to know that's a possiblity."

"Tweek. No." Said Craig definitively. I just smiled back at him. And that's what I've been doing since. Smiling.

Xxx

To clarify, the bit about the swimming hat and googles is from a little comic, not me. I just thought it was so cute that it needed to be in the story. Here's the link, I couldn't find the creator. I did at least sort of try. https://i.pinimg.com/236x/38/0d/e2/380de27b5cc4ef22e5c517fe81aa60c5.jpg

Hope you enjoyed that! Leave a vote if you did! And comments are always appreciated. Have an awesome day! :)