(please spam me with comments to read thank)

Honey, me, and  Laurie : *standing in the middle of the road*

Car : *coming straight at us*

Honey and me : *jump out the way*

me : Laurie why aren't you moving?!

-flashback-

Laurie, like 4 years old : *rolls down hill into the middle of the street as a car comes*

-flashback end-

Laurie : I'll be fine

Car : *hits their side*

Laurie : that was my good side too

-

Honey : *taps Bee's shoulder* moms having a mental breakdown again

Bee : oh shit-

me : *poking her back* mommmmmmmmmmmmm 

Laurie : *sobbing with her headphones in*

Bee : *takes my headphones* no. no more.

Laurie : whyyyyy

-

me : mother Bee.

Bee : AH SHIT THE HELL!! yes Latte?

me : mother Laur brought home a guy.

Bee : yes? and? 

me : she keeps calling him Jesse.

Bee : yes? AND? 

me : I wanna kill him.

Bee : you can't kill random people!

-

Laurie : Jesse it'll be fine my kids and platonic wife will love you 

 Jesse : okay? 

me : *walks in* Mother Laur we have run out of nugs and you get the hell out of my house 

 Bee : *walks in* oh hell no *walks out* 

Honey : *pops out celling board* shit I thought it was someone pog

-

therapist : I believe you said that your childhood experience was satisfactory?

Bee or Angel : no, you misheard me. I said it was a "sadness factory"

-

Laurie : okay guys, we're getting a new crackhead

Honey : oooo are we stealing them?

Angel : new or used?

Laurie : wonderful responses, both of you

-

Bee : we just ate, why are you making pancakes?

Laurie : they're for the dogs

Bee : why are you making pancakes for the dogs?

Laurie : they don't know how

-

Laurie : girls are hot

Laurie : but so are guys

Laurie : why is everyone hot?

me : global warming

-

Honey : I'm a responsible person

Bee : *raises eyebrow*

Honey : I'm a person

-

Bee : this type of idiocy will not be tolerated in this house!

Angel :

Angel : Is there another type of idiocy that you would be more comfortable with?

also can someone please buy this for me?