Jordan sat on the porch swing sipping on his morning coffee. He was the first one awake as always. He had woken just in time to sit on his horse in the middle of the pasture watching as the sun rose over the horizon. That had been a morning ritual for him over the years,  to watch the sun rise in the morning.

Normally he would be in the kitchen making breakfast but he had done that earlier today. He knew he needed to talk to Bethany about yesterday, what would he say to her? He had no idea.

Knowing her she would be up any minute trying to sneak out of the house and head to work undetected so she could avoid talking. Which is why he was out here instead of in the kitchen.

Yesterday had been so perfect. He had gotten so close to kissing her, he could feel the hint of her breath whispering against his lips. He remembers how he had shuddered in anticipation. Then Lila happened.

Shit.

He listened as heavy footsteps came down the stairs then faded as they went further into the house.

One of the brothers were up. Which mean she wasn't far behind.

He drank the rest of his coffee and twirled the cup in his hands as he waited. Just as he expected, light footsteps came down the stairs. He watched as the front door was quietly pushed open as Bethany did her best not to make a sound.

Another day he would have been amused but instead it bothered him that she really was intending to avoid him.

She turned and a startled squeak left her mouth. She clamped her hand over her heart and took a breath.

“I didn't expect to see anyone out here” she said not looking at his face.

“I know” he replied

He watched as she nervously nibbled on her lip. He wanted so much to place a finger against her mouth to stop the simple action that shouldn't be affecting him but it was.

“Listen about yesterday…” He began

“I'm going to go get a quick breakfast before I head to work” she interrupted then turned to hurry back inside.

In a quick motion he sprang out of the swing and grabbed hold of her hand to stop her escape.

“Don't run away” he pleaded

“I'm not running away from anything” she defended

“Bethany I'm sorry about yesterday OK? I didn't know she was going to be there” he explained wishing she would look at him.

“You have no reason to apologize Jordan. I'm the one that's sorry. I should know better by now to expect the unexpected with men” she replied

“It's not like that.” He said feeling frustrated that it seems she had every intention of brushing him off. He wasn't sure why it bothered him so much. She was obviously giving him a easy way out but standing here with her, he didn't want that.

“Jordan it's fine” finally she looked at him. He felt his heart drop to his stomach.

All he saw was understanding in her eyes. He wanted to growl in protest. He realized he didn't want her to understand. He wanted her to be angry, yell at him, but she stood before him calm.

“We're just friends. At least I hope we are. Yesterday just brought back some painful memories for me that's all” she explained

He looked at her confused.

“So you weren't upset that we were having a moment that was rudely interrupted?” He asked

Don't say no, don't say no, please don't say no.

“No” she replied looking at his hand that still held hers.

“Fine” he said in a clipped tone.

“I'm happy you have someone. If she makes you happy then you should go for it. Life's too short to spend it holding on to the wrong people. Just be happy. You deserve it” she told him

He let her go when she lightly tugged on her arm. He wasn't sure how to respond so he watched her as she turned and walked back inside.

We're friends now? Friends? What the…

He grumbled as he picked up his cup and made his way to the kitchen.

Joseph had his nose buried in his laptop while Bethany was busy scooping jam onto her toast. Jordan walked over to where she stood but frowned when she hurried to go take a seat.

“Morning” Jason grumbled as he walked into the kitchen

Jordan lifted his cup in greeting before pouring himself more coffee.

“Good morning Jason!” Bethany greeted in a bright tone.

All activities in the kitchen seized. Even Joseph lifted his head from his work to peek at her. Jordan paused with his cup halfway to his mouth then he glanced over to see Jason looking at Bethany as though she had sprouted a second head. He was wondering the same thing.

“Uh...morning” Jason replied hesitantly

“How did you sleep?” She asked him

He watched as Jason turned his head to the side like a puppy fascinated by a new sound. It was almost comical.

“Fine?” His brother replied scratching his head in confusion.

Jordan ignored the questioning look that Joseph sent him.

“That's great!” She replied going back to her breakfast.

What the heck?

Jason mouthed to him. Jordan looked away from his brothers puzzled expression to stare at Bethany.

“OK then. Guys I'll be gone probably for the rest of the week. I have some matters that needs my attention” Joseph announced breaking the awkward silence.

“What about the gallery opening later this evening?” asked Jason

“I'm leaving right after” Joseph told him.

Jordan listened to his brothers though his eyes never left Bethany's face even though she refused to look at him.

“Knock knock!" He heard Lila say "The front door was wide open so I just let myself in” she explained

Everyone turned as Lila walked into the kitchen. All eyes turned to Bethany then to Jordan.

“Lila, what brings you by?” Asked Jordan

“You did. You invited me over today remember?” She said as she walked over to him and wrapped her arms around him in a hug.

“I remember. I just didn't expect you this early” Jordan replied

“I couldn't wait to see you” she purred

Everyone glanced at Bethany when she mumbled:

Clearly.

“You” Lila said turning to pin Bethany with a cool expression.

“Me” Bethany responded with a all but friendly smile.

Oh boy.

“I guess I'm not the only one that stopped by early” said Lila with narrowed eyes

“Oh you're the only one dear. I woke up here” Bethany responded with a innocent expression.

Jordan stood uncomfortably watching the two woman sizing each other up. So far he was a little surprised but secretly amused at Bethany's tactics.

“She spent the night?” Lila asked turning to him.

“I live here” Bethany answered before he could get a word out.

“Is this what you wanted to talk to me about?” Lila asked him

“Not exactly” Jordan replied

“Are you two dating?” Asked Lila

Jordan felt a little guilty at the hurt look on her face.

“No honey. If I were dating him, I wouldn't have been dumb like some people and walk away. By the time I'm done with him. He wouldn't let me go anyways.” Bethany replied

Hot damn.

Jordan glanced at her as she walked by them to put her plate in the sink. She was still avoiding looking at him.

“I'll drive you in a moment just wait” he told her

“No need” she replied “Jason will take me to work”

“What!?” Jordan and Jason exclaimed while Joseph coughed to hide his laughter.

“Let's go Jason!” Bethany called over her shoulder.

“Yes ma'am” Jason meekly replied as he followed Bethany out the door.

“I'll leave you two to it then” said Joseph as he gathered up his computer and his files and left the kitchen.

Jordan walked away from Lila and back to the front porch. He knew she would be following closely behind so he didn't bother to check.

The air had changed. The morning light struggled through the murky cloud, but even in its weakness it was enough to blind.

Looks like sun today.

“Are you seeing her?” Lila asked from behind him.

Yes, everywhere I go. Eyes closed or opened, she's always there. Her smile, her face, her sad eyes, she stays with me.

Instead he answered “no”

“But she lives here” said Lila

“I offered her a place to stay until she gets back on her feet”  Jordan replied

“For how long?” She asked

“For however long it might take.” He said turning to face her. “Why are you here Lila? After all these years. Why are you back?”

“I told you I missed you” she said walking over to him

He took a step back before she could hug him again.

“The truth this time? I know once you left me you just moved right on to someone new, what happened to him?” He asked

“Shawn wasn't the guy for me. I left him” she told him.

“I could stand here and pretend I want to hear you out but I'd be lying. When you left you shattered a piece of me. You left me to pick up the pieces on my own. I never heard from you again. The same day I had planned to propose to you...you left”

He watched as surprised then dread swept across her face.

“You were going to propose?” She whispered

“Lila, I'm not sure what you want from me right now, I'm not sure I'd be willing to give it either” he told her

“But I still care about you” she pleaded

“I'm not so sure how I feel about you” he told her.

“We can at least try” she told him

“You'd be wasting your time” he said honestly

“That's a chance I'm willing to take” she told him

"It's not a good time for me right now. Things are different, I'm different" he explained

"So am I. I'm more mature. I'd never make the same mistakes again." She told him

"I want..." He started to say then stopped.

"You want what?" Tell me and I'll get it for you. What do you want?" She asked

Bethany, I want Bethany.

“I want you to leave” he told her

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