The restaurant of Donovan's friend wasn't just any restaurant, but nothing is just as it seems when Donovan Steele was involved.

I should've known. 

I had heard about this restaurant, I could never afford to even look at places like this before, nevermind eat inside, but knowing certain people and having money really does open doors for you, especially considering right now I'm sat inside Il Fiore, the Italian Michelin star restaurant.

The restaurant alone was out of this world, we sat in a private booth away from the eyes of the other rich, well-known people in NY, with our own room, table, and server, it was beyond any date I'd ever been on.

I see someone I recognize walk to our table before Donovan does, and when she gets close, she sticks her head inside the room and grins at me making me smile back politely, catching the attention of Donovan, and making him turn around to see what I was smiling at.

"I was told we were having special guests, but I never thought it'd be you, Steele." She says amused, as Donovan gets up to hug her, with a relaxed grin on his face. "I never thought I'd see you in here anytime soon."

I'm completely speechless, I've never seen Donovan hug anyone, or seen him around friends, or mention any friend before, and now I'm seeing him hug THE Carmen Skitz, the most beautiful chef I've ever seen, and the owner of this place.

"What?" He huffed out. "A man has to eat." He jokes, his eyes focusing back on me, making me nervous.

"I'm actually here on a date." He tells her, hinting at me, making her eyes go wide once she looks at me.

"This is Evan Beckett, my date."

There's a moment of silence, making a big pile of dread sit in my stomach, but it goes away just as fast once Carmen smiles widely as she catches on to who exactly Donovan is on a date with.

"Well shit." She said before gaping as her eyes flash. "I know who you are."

"You're on TV." She says surprised. "The famous actor, right? The one with the high school drama."

Smiling politely, I get up from my seat and shake her hand.

"Yep, that's me, in the flesh." I say nervously, seeing Donovan smile from the corner of my eye.

"What are you doing on a date with this loser?" She says, pulling me into a hug, surprising me. "You should date me, I'm much more fun than Donovan."

Donovan snorts and sits down, glaring at Carmen. "Good luck with that, I had to bribe him just to come here tonight with me."

I blush once the words leave his mouth, knowing that twenty minutes ago he had to practically order clothes for me, and put my socks and shoes on after I had second thoughts, nervous about being seen together on a date.

This is what I was nervous about...

"Really?" She laughs. "I don't blame you, Evan, this one is really needy once you tear away those onion layers of him."

"Deep down Donovan is nothing more than a big softie."

Donovan glares at his friend while I laugh at both of them. 

"I suppose you know what you both want?" She asks both of us, and Donovan nods his head.

As Donovan orders for the both of us, I see the curious faces of couples with linked arms walking past our private booth, wearing the finest of dresses and suits, matched with accessories that cost more than anything I'd ever make in my lifetime.

I bet they're wondering who the hell I am, and why I'm here with Donovan Steele, the billionaire.

How do I explain this situation without knowing fully what I am to him? Are we dating now? Is he my boyfriend or is he still seeing women?

I have no idea, but what I do know is that we weren't gay until we started our 'relationship', so what the hell does that make us now?

Are we... dating?

"Evan?"

I snap out of my thoughts and look up to Donovan, seeing that Carmen had left and it was just the two of us now.

"Yes?" I clear my throat. "Sorry, what did you say?"

Donovan, who looked so handsome, with his messy styled short dark hair and his expensive suit with his shirt opened... he looked like he belonged here, like an expensive piece of art, and then there was me...

Fuck, I feel so uncomfortable.

"I asked what you wanted to drink." He said, his eyes piercing into mine. "What's wrong?"

Swallowing hard, I force out a smile. "Nothing, really, I just zoned out."

I shouldn't have come here... maybe this is a mistake, it's too soon, I don't know how I feel about people knowing just yet... with everything going on I-

"Don't lie to me, Evan." Donovan's deep voice makes the hairs on my arms stand. "I can see it on your face."

I look past him as my hands start to sweat under the table, nervous about other people hearing us.

"Tell me what's on your mind." He demands, his voice hard.

Taking a deep breath, I look straight at Donovan. "What are we exactly?" I ask him.

My chest starts pounding, and Donovan looks emotionless as he sits back and stares at me, not a single giveaway to tell me what he's thinking right now as the words left my mouth.

"We haven't been together for months, and even then our relationship wasn't exactly normal." I say, keeping eye contact. "I just want to kn-"

"You want to know if this date is real or not." He says, and I nod my head slowly.

He sighs and then chuckles, closing his eyes. "Evan..."

He opens his eyes, amusement swirling in them. "I declared my love for you in front of my parents, and you're asking me what we are?"

My heart skips a beat.

"I like to think we're together as a couple." He says, nonchalantly.

"Are we together, Evan?"

Just like that, the world stops and all I see is Donovan, this beautiful man who I once couldn't stand, now I physically can't stand, the way he makes my legs weak from a single confirmation...

I'm so fucked.

Clearing my throat, I feel my face grow warmer, not used to being in this situation with a guy, and definitely not in public with a guy, publically telling me he loved me.

"W-When did you-" I stutter out, then clear my throat again.

"When did you declare your love?" I ask, not remembering him ever saying anything about us when we were at his parent's house.

The waiter comes into the room, with a tray with two wine glasses and a bottle of wine, the room falls silent as the waiter prepared the drinks for us, Donovan's eyes never left mine, his intimidating eyes holding me completely captive, making me squirm under his gaze.

The waiter leaves and I feel like I can finally breathe again.

"I've never brought a girl, or even friends home before." Donovan suddenly says, making me look at him confused.

"When I was younger, I always said the first person I bring to them, is the person I want to be with for the rest of my life." He said, taking a sip of his wine. "I meant it then and I mean it now."

"I'm too impatient to dance around the motion of our relationship like children, We're both adults and I know what I want and so do you." He said, putting his drink down, his grey eyes shining brighter under the light.

"If I had my way, you'd be living with me with a ring on your finger already." He says, making me go completely red.

"Stop joking." I laugh nervously, taking my glass in my hand, and dismissing the serious look in his eye. "Are you saying you want to marry me someday?" I joke, taking a big sip of my drink. 

"We haven't even been together for that long." I say, my voice more steady now. "There's also the fact we don't know anything about each other, and we're both men, straight men." I point out.

"I've not looked at a woman in four months." He snaps out angrily. "Is it that strange for me, another man to fall in love with you?" He says, his eyes turning darker under the light.

"I'm not ready for that!" I whisper yell out. "I'm not you Donovan! I don't have the confidence to just say whatever I want, I don't have that luxury, my friends, my family, fuck-even my fans"

"What we do is no one else's business." He states, sighing. "I'm not saying you have to come out to be with me, but I want to be with you, I don't want to hide our relationship from anyone, and I'm not ashamed to love you, a man."

"Are you ashamed, Evan?"

I swallow hard, feeling as if the room is spinning as I start to feel sick.

"I need to go, this was too soon." I get up from my seat."

Donovan gets up and stops me, bringing my body close to his as he wraps his arm around me, only then do I realize that I was crying as the tears from my eyes wet his shirt.

"I'm sorry okay?" His gentle voice whispers into my hair as he holds me. "I'm not trying to push you into anything."

"I will wait as long as it takes for you Evan, I'm not saying you need to declare your love for me publicly."

I clench his jacket as I try to control myself. "I'll be strong enough for the both of us if that's what you need, just lean on me and let me do everything, okay?"

The fear falls away like clothes on my body, effortlessly, just like that, Donovan makes me feel like it's okay to cry into him, to be scared and express how I feel, and even though I'm scared, not just of peoples reactions, but to be also seen in this world with him.

I'm terrified... but I'm also excited because I've never felt this before with anyone else, I know I can lean on Donovan, after everything he's still not given up on me, and even now, he's refusing to let me sink.

Do I deserve this happiness? With this beautiful man whose way out of my league.

I want to stand next to him, and be proud he's mine, in public... who knows, living together sounded nice, but baby steps... but in the meantime.... fuck..

I'm totally gay for Donovan Steele.