File: #1 

Name: Asha Aries

Notes: She's sweet and loveable but has anger issues. 

***

"So, Asha, how are we doing today?" Owen asked, and Asha sat across from him, looking grumpy. Her arms were crossed over her chest, and she was swinging her leg that was crossed over her other leg. A pouty look rested on her face.

"Fine." She replied in an annoyed tone.

"Are you sure? You seem a bit upset today; why don't we talk about that? Why are you upset today?" Owen encouraged her to open up.

"Because Aubrey keeps hanging out with Aliens and not me anymore." Asha finally replied after a long pause. 

"So you appear to be jealous-" Owen started to say, but Asha cut him off.

"I'm not fucking jealous!" She yelled at him, and Owen glared.

"Yes, you so clearly are not jealous in the least." He replied sarcastically, and she bit her lip and sighed. 

"Fine! I'm jealous! I have a right to be; we are married!" Asha began shouting in one of her angry fits.

"Actually, that's the exact reason you shouldn't be jealous. Aubrey has a right to make as many friends as she wants. Just remember she's still coming home to you at the end of the day. Not that she leaves home, to begin with, but you know what I mean." He said, and she calmed down a bit and nodded. 

"I guess you're right. I never thought of it that way." Asha replied quietly, and Owen nodded.

"Whenever you start getting angry or upset about something, think about how it can be a good thing." He suggested, and Asha rolled her eyes but agreed and left. 

***

File: #2

Name: Tori Taurus

Notes: Eats a lot and tends to be stubborn. 

***

"How are you today, Tori?" Owen asked and glared at her when she opened a bag of chips and started munching. 

"I'm fabulous; why am I even here?" She asked him, and he continued to glare.

"First off, how many times do I have to tell you that you can't eat in my office?" He asked, and she scuffed.

"That's a ridiculous rule, but you should prescribe me tacos as antidepressants." She told him, and he rubbed his temples.

"How many times do I have to tell you I can not prescribe tacos?" He asked, and she glared.

"Why not? They make me happy!" She responded, and he shook his head.

"Insurance doesn't cover tacos, and all food makes you happy. The real issue here is your stubbornness." He said, and she stood and rolled her eyes. 

"You know what? This is ridiculous! You are a terrible therapist. I'm out of here! I am not stubborn, and everyone loves food!" Tori stalked out, and Owen sighed. 

"I never can win, can I?" He muttered to himself.

***

File: #3

Name: Gretchen Gemini

Notes: Two-faced and thinks she's always right. 

***

"How are you today, Gretchen?" Owen asked politely.

"Terrible; I mean, there is no reason I should be here! I'm literally always right, so that's how I know I shouldn't be here. Everyone thinks they are just so much better than me, but really they are all trash." Gretchen went off on her a little tangent, and Owen sighed.

"Gretchen listens, you aren't always right, and you shouldn't talk down to others. You also should not talk about others behind their back; it's rude and two-faced."

"I don't give a fuck; I'm not two-faced! I can't believe everyone thinks that! I'm going to text Caren right now and tell her to tell you that you are stupid." Gretchen started texting Caren, and Owen stared at her in shock.

"You don't think anything about what you just said isn't two-faced?" Owen asked as he received a text from Caren telling him he was stupid. 

"No, absolutely not! What part of that was two-faced?" She responded with her own question.

"Why couldn't you just tell me I was "stupid" to my face? Why'd you have to tell Caren to do it?" He asked, and Gretchen was taken aback. 

"Because I'm not a bad person!" She said, and Owen sighed.

"You are still the person who originally said it; therefore, you are still a bad person even if you ask someone else to say it. Plus, calling someone stupid is mean, and you wouldn't like it if someone said that about you." He replied, and she huffed.

"I don't care what anyone else thinks! I know they are wrong, and I'm right! You don't know what you are even talking about!" Gretchen got up and stormed out, and Owen sighed.

***

File: #4

Name: Caren Cancer

Notes: Cries about everything, is very emotional, also incredibly mean and rude, and thinks everyone's below her: impulsive liar, a literal serial killer.

***

"Caren listen, next time Gretchen tells you to tell someone something for her, you need to tell her to tell them herself." Owen began without even asking how she was. 

Caren started crying and was absolutely distraught, "I'm sorry! I don't like arguing with her; she's so mean!" Caren was sobbing, but Owen wasn't having it.

"Caren, you are mean! You treat your friends terribly! For god's sake, you killed my dog!" Owen shouted at her.

"That wasn't personal! I did it for the money!" She shouted back through her sobs.

"That doesn't make it right! There is no excuse for being a terrible person!" The two continued to shout at each other for about five minutes, going back and forth.

"Whatever, I fucking hate you! You just made me feel worse; you don't deserve to live!" Caren ran out crying. Owen sighed for probably the tenth time today and shook his head.

"Sometimes I really hate my job," he muttered to himself, then glanced toward the door and shouted, "next!"

***

File: #5

Name: Lori Leo

Notes: Always in some sort of criminal trouble. Thinks the world revolves around them. 

***

"How are you today, Lori?" Owen asked with a sigh; he was well prepared to hear about another arrest story. 

"I'm great! I'm so glad I've gotten a job at The Frisky Scorpion. Scarlett's so proud of me that I haven't been arrested in a whole week! Things are looking up!" Lori replied, and Owen was shocked. 

"I'm happy to hear about that; how is Scarlett's business doing?" He asked, hoping that Lori was actually helping and not dragging it down. 

"Who cares about Scarlett right now? This is about me!" Lori responded, clearly offended. 

"First off, the world doesn't revolve around you, Lori. Secondly, that question was more about you than you think it was. I was trying to find out if you're actually helping and not dragging it down." He replied, and she laughed. 

"It does revolve around me! I'm literally ruled by the Sun! That means the world revolves around me! I'm not dragging it down, either! I just saved Scarlett last night from two drunk weirdos trying to put their hands all over her; stripper rules look but don't touch! I beat them up and threw them up. Then Scarlett had sex with me because I'm the best, and she appreciates my existence!" Lori went off on a little tangent. 

"Lori, that is not how that works, you may be ruled by the Sun, but you aren't the Sun! However, I am glad to hear you are doing your job and enjoying it." He responded with a sigh. 

"Whatever, Owen, you don't understand just how lucky you are to be in the same room as me! What are you even ruled by? A black hole?" She snicked and got up to leave. 

"I'm ruled by Chiron, which is considered the planet of healing." He stated, slightly offended. 

"Ha! That's not even a planet! It's an asteroid, you dumb fuck! Bye, loser!" Lori practically skipped out, as usual, utterly full of herself. 

"I need a new job..." Owen said quietly to himself.

***

File: #6

Name: Victoria Virgo

Notes: Obsessive-compulsive, wants everything perfect.

***

"How are things, Victoria?" Owen asked in annoyance because he hated her. 

"I'm well; my garden is absolutely flourishing ever since that dog of yours quit shitting in it; how is he, by the way? Oh, wait, he's dead!" She cackled like a witch, and Owen almost cried. 

"You know what bitch? I'm not helping you get the fuck out of my office!" He said, and Victoria got offended.

"You have to help me! I pay you! Not that I need your help, that is." She replied with an eye-roll. 

"Oh, Victoria tell me, what do you think of yourself when you look in the mirror? Are you as perfect as the facade you put on? I don't think you are. In fact, you are far from it!" He responded in a matter-of-fact tone and slammed his clipboard on his desk. "You are as worthless as the shit my dog took in your flower bed, and I hope you rot in hell!" He sat back down, and Victoria ran out crying while Owen felt proud of himself.