A/N: This wasn't a Tumblr prompt, more like an assignment for a fic exchange on Ao3 with my pocket friends! I didn't know where else to put it so yeah haha in here it goes.
For renegadeontherunn (shwifey my beloved)

Ahsoka rolled her shoulders back as she strode through the halls of the Jedi temple, blinking the dust out of her eyes. Padawans and knights stared at her, whispers flooding the air, but she didn't pay any attention to them as she headed for her destination, just wanting to feel safe. She didn't want attention, she just wanted the peacefulness of her privacy, where no one could bother her or ask questions, or anything like that.

Just hours ago, she was on the planet of Wasskah, living to survive and running like prey under the cover of leaves and trees. She had lead Jedi padawans her age through the forest, and although two of them made it back safely, one still died.

She still remembered the bolt ripping through Kalifa's chest and her promise to keep O-Mer and Jinx safe, just seconds until she was back on the move, leaving the Jedi's body to rot.

Jedi weren't supposed to die like that. There was always a funeral to honor what they have done.

But this war didn't provide that anymore.

Jedi wouldn't die peacefully, or when the Force came to collect them from their age, no. Their life could just be extinguished with a bolt, a flick of a lightsaber. Kalifa's bright future had been slaughtered just for the Trandoshans' entertainment.

Her fists clenched at the unfairness of it as she punched in her door code a little harder than necessary. Anakin had quickly led her to the Halls of Healing with the other two padawans, and they were all malnourished and dehydrated with infections forming on some of their injuries.

She was now finished with her checkup, but she still felt dirty, the blood under her nails adding to her feeling of filthiness. She had scrubbed alright, she had washed her hands so many times, trying to get rid of the grime but every time the faucet turned off, it was as if she didn't wash her hands at all. It was as if someone was still watching her from the shadows, it was as if she was still back on Wakksah, it was as if-

It was as if she wasn't even here at all like this was just a dream of hers, like she was still in the tree with O-Mer and Jinx with no one coming to their rescue. She shook herself out of her stupor as she slapped her cheek lightly, bringing herself back to reality.

She was here. Everything was alright. She was safe.

And yet, she couldn't help her paranoia that was growing. Her door opened and she immediately stepped inside, whipping around to close it in record time.

"Snips? You alright?"

Oh. Anakin was here. She thought he would be at a meeting, or maybe stay in the Senatorial apartments.

She turned around to face her master, who was sitting on the couch with a datapad in his hand, his eyes scanning her in concern.

"Ahsoka?"

She nodded quickly, flashing him a smile.

"Yep. The healers just said I needed some rest and told me what food I needed to eat to get back in shape. Luckily my wounds just needed some bacta, but I think the others need to stay there a bit longer."

"That's good then," Anakin replied, nodding his head in approval, but not before he looked back up at her again. This time, it felt like he was staring into her soul, like he could see every dark secret and fear she was hiding.

"How 'bout mentally?"

His tone was light-hearted, but she could hear his undercurrent of worry in his question.

How was she really? It was definitely going to take a few days, maybe even weeks to get back into her normal life. But she could handle herself, she usually did! She was an independent girl, she didn't need people worrying about her.

"I...I think I'm fine with that as well."

She nodded quickly, as if convincing herself, and she thought she did a good job at persuading Anakin until he stood up, walking over to her with that paternal worry. She wasn't a child anymore, she could take care of herself.

She was resentful, and she couldn't find the reason why. Was it because they didn't search for her longer? Was it because she had to face that alone? No. It wasn't.

She knew she could've done better. And yet she didn't. That was the reason why.

"Snips, you can tell me anything, you know that, right?"

The bitterness aimed at herself faded away into the background as she sensed his genuine curiosity.

"Yeah Anakin, I know that."

"Good." He flashed her a small smile as he gestured towards her room. "Go shower and get some rest then."

"But the report-"

"I'll take care of that."

Ahsoka raised a brow marking, crossing her hands over her chest. Yeah sure, Rex usually was the one to write the reports, but she helped! Sometimes. At least she helped him more than Anakin did.

"I swear, I'll take care of this one! Now, go. You deserve a break."

She stared at him for a while longer and complied without protest, immediately turning left to her private quarters. The door shut behind her, and she turned on the washroom light, finally exhaling a breath she didn't know she was holding.

It was just her and her jumbled thoughts now.

~~

Anakin walked back to the couch, taking the datapad laying on the pillows. A frown dipped at the corners of his mouth as he tried to make sense of the words in front of him, sighing after a few minutes of silence.

He couldn't do this now. He couldn't focus. There was too much on his mind.

Anakin tossed the device to his right, rubbing his eyes and trying to force away the exhaustion waiting to pounce behind his eyes. The night breeze flew through the open windows, the cold keeping him awake as it bit his cheek. He could faintly hear the shower water run in Ahsoka's room.

He moved to lean against the couch as he stared up at the ceiling, his hands fidgeting with a random battery that he just grabbed from the table in front of him. Technology littered the ground, various tools and inventions lined up against the wall. That had been his company for the past days.

Ahsoka had been gone for about a week, and although the time period was short, it felt like an eternity. He had searched for her without rest, running on caffeine and stims, and he would do it for his padawan time and time again.

He had blamed himself for her disappearance, and desperation had overcome him as he became a mess. He didn't even go to Padmé's apartment, only leaving her a message about trying to search for Ahsoka, and he was glad that she understood.

Anakin didn't know how long it took for him to fall asleep, but it only felt like seconds before darkness took him from the past few days.

~~

Ahsoka stepped out of the shower, steam spilling and heat evaporating. She looked down at her arms, and they were a pale red, from her scrubbing with the sponge as hard as she could to get everything off. She felt a bit better, but she could still hear the faint sounds of a bolt blasted through the air. She toweled herself dry, changing into sweatpants and a loose shirt and walking out into the living room. She spotted her master's dormant presence on the couch, tossing his blanket over him and tiptoeing to the kitchen for a glass of water before she retreated back into her bed, snug under the layers of warmth.

Her eyes closed as she breathed out a long sigh. It wasn't long before she too fell asleep.

~~

Roars filled Ahsoka's montrals as she stumbled through roots and trees, cuts and dirt staining her skin. She was running, running from what, she didn't know, only that she needed to get away, needed to survive.

Her vision caught sight of a forest opening far ahead, and she urged herself to dash faster, her heart pumping rapidly under her chest as she quickly panted. She arrived at her destination, looking behind her for her unseen predator, but as she looked forward again, her breath was stolen from her lungs, her surroundings changing into a battlefield.

Dead bodies were scattered on the ground, and she knew every single face. She spotted a girl with brown short hair, her eyes staring blankly at her with a hole through her chest, the wound still smoking. Several clone troopers were surrounding the area, some with blue paint, and some with none at all. Their helmets were nowhere to be found, each of their faces staring at her, but it wasn't empty.

It was filled with accusations.

Whispers coated the area as she stepped back in horror, and her foot met something soft. As she looked down, she shrieked as she found a head, belonging to the Trandoshan she had killed. The voices grew louder, and the faces in front of her changed, from nameless clones to Rex, to Fives, to Echo, to Anakin.

She blinked rapidly, trying to find a way out of whatever hell she was trapped in, but the abominations resting in front of her were still quickly changing as the habitat evolved into different planets. They had begun to stand up, blood tearing down from their eyes and mouth, walking corpses.

She stumbled back, trying to get away. Her hands patted around for her lightsabers, and when they met the cold metal, she gripped it.

"Who are you?!"

As she asked the question, names were murmured, so many said, and yet she couldn't catch them all.

"Ahsoka?"

She whirled around and almost cried out in relief as she spotted a familiar face, alive and confused. He was walking out of the Jedi temple now, with a breeze scattering leaves around the ground.

"Master!"

All of a sudden, the man's face warped, his icy blue eyes flashing in hate as he ignited his lightsaber. The sun was gone and it was a dark night as rain dropped from the sky.

"Master? Pathetic."

Her eyes widened in hurt confusion as her hands pulled out her lightsaber hilt, just in time to block a strike. She didn't know what was going on anymore.

"How could I have a padawan like you? You couldn't save anyone."

Another strike, another parry. He attempted to slice at her defenses, aiming for her arms, and she barely jumped back as the heat flicked across the hairs of it. As she cautiously analyzed his movement, the man spoke again.

"All those men on Ryloth? On Teth? Men that died in space because of you? Gone."

She jumped over his blade as it cut through the space where her legs had been, only to crouch down as she tried to avoid a hit to her montrals.

"Kalifa? Gone. She could've been a better student than you."

Anakin's lightsaber crashed above her head and she blocked it with her own, her knees bent as she tried to support herself. She rolled out from under him as her arms gave out, his blade stabbing through the ground.

"You're reckless, arrogant, and stupid. You shouldn't even be a Jedi."

The fight continued as Anakin spewed out her insecurities, each one hitting like a dagger to her heart. She knew he wouldn't say those things, she knew he wouldn't, but everything seemed so real. She could hear the trees rustling, could feel the heat of his lightsaber, taste the drops in the air, and the force wasn't telling her anything.

Her concentration slipped but that was all it took for her master to rip through her defenses. She saw a flash of light before her eyes snapped open.

Ahsoka sat up, breathing heavily with tears running down her face, her blanket tossed on the ground just minutes ago. Only seconds later did Anakin barge into her room, looking around for any signs of danger before making his way to her bedside, a disturbed look on his face.

"Ahsoka! What happened? I felt..."

He didn't elaborate as he motioned vaguely. She didn't turn to him and he frowned, moving closer.

"Snips?"

He waved a hand in front of her face, but she didn't even blink. Only when he touched her shoulder did she start, her head whipping around and her body tense as she snarled, teeth glinting in the moonlight.

"Woah! Ahsoka!"

He sent calming waves through their bond, backing away in reflex as her eyes finally cleared. A gasp escaped her as she finally saw him standing against the shadows, quickly drying her tears as she bowed her head in shame.

"I'm sorry."

She didn't say any more as she picked up her blanket, dusting it off and laying it over herself. She acted like a trapped animal, scared and dangerous, but he knew it would wear off.

"Do you...want to tell me what happened?"

Anakin stepped closer sitting on the end of her bed. He had woken up to jolts of icy cold prickles against his mind, and he knew exactly who it belonged to as he sped to her room, trying to unlock it.

"A lot of things."

Her answer was curt, and it looked like she didn't want to talk about it at all. He nodded and stood up and she immediately tracked his movement, blinking owlishly as he gestured for her to follow him. She stood up and they made their way to the kitchen table, where Anakin kept the lights low. Ahsoka sat on the couch, looking aimlessly at the furniture as if it was her first time there, then looking back to her master as he brought two mugs. She remembered doing this when she was younger, when she had nightmares of any kind. Anakin had always been there for her, and now although it was less frequent, he was still there for her in the end.

He sat beside her, offering her a cup, but she didn't take it. He took her hand and cupped it around her mug.

"Drink."

Her hands hesitantly brought the tea to her lips, relaxing as a warm sweet earthy taste touched her tongue. He watched her, sipping from his own cup, and he quickly went into his own room to grab a blanket, covering it over Ahsoka and himself. It was silent as they continued to empty their cups, the cozy quiet atmosphere making Ahsoka's eyes droop.

"I know you probably don't want to talk about it."

Her silence was his answer and he took another drink. He flashed her a quick look and he could already see that her grip on her cup was loosened.

"So we won't. But just know, I'm here for you, and death is a natural part of life, no matter how short it is for some people."

Ahsoka's eyes snapped up to his, her eyes clear of sleep, which he regretted, but he looked back in understanding.

Anakin had caught a glimpse of her nightmare, and the unfamiliar girl seemed to be part of the cause for Ahsoka's insecurities. The togruta sniffed, nodding her head slowly, and she leaned against him, making herself comfortable. He wrapped an arm around her, pulling her closer to his side until she was almost buried under the blanket. She was still so small, but not fragile the slightest, he quickly reminded himself as he remembered her slicing through droids.

"I-Her death was my fault. If I had been faster, If I-"

Her muffled voice sped up as she came on the verge of hyperventilating, and Anakin shushed her, patting her back and making eye contact.

"Her death wasn't your fault. You tried your hardest, and sure, she died, but she's one with the force now. She's at peace."

He wiped a tear that dripped from her eye, and she blinked, resting back onto his side. He continued with his speech.

"It's natural, Ahsoka. You remember that battle above Ryloth?"

Her back muscles tensed up underneath his hands but he kept moving it up and down her spine until she relaxed.

"Do you remember what I told you?"

Her answer was immediate. "Take heart, little one. That's the reality of command."

He chuckled darkly, remembering every single moment he had let his friends, citizens, his own mother down. Unlike him, however, Ahsoka's innocence was still bright.

"Correct. It still applies to this today."

He waited for her answer, but none came. As he turned his head to look at her, he smiled as he noticed that she was asleep, her cup empty and little purrs vibrating through her. He lightly grabbed the mug and set it on the table before he rested back in his position, falling asleep with his padawan at his side.