Song: Someone you loved by Lewis Capaldi

The flight home felt like it took days even though it was only a few hours. After the bullet was taken out of my arm and sewed back up, I downed two shots of whiskey. I ignored everyone talking and looked out the window the whole time not moving. I think about my life, how I started this job in the first place and why I continue to do it knowing that I could die at any moment. I think about my girl back at home laying there lifeless and if she was to wake what if I never came back...shit I live a fucked up life. What I would do to just have her hold me...I need her so much right now. I need her to hold me and get me through all of this.

When the plane lands, the guys all go their own way. I get in the car that is waiting for me and Atticus gets in the back with me. A few times he acts like he wants to tell me something but he keeps quite. Which is a good thing because even though we are on the same side, I'm still not over being pissed off at him.We pull up and the first thing I do when I get out is go to Scarlett.

My mom is sitting beside her and when she smiles up at me; my eyes cast the floor trying to avoid hers. I walk over and kiss Scarlett on the cheek. My mom must sense that something is wrong. I see her stand up and walk over to me placing a hand on my arm. "Is everything ok, you look like you've seen a ghost?"

I turn and grab her hand as we walk back out of the room. I have her follow me to the living room away from Scarlett. She pulls out of my hold and turns to look at me. "What is going on Mekhi you are starting to scare me? And what happened to your arm?"She reaches out to touch it and I try not to flinch.

"I was shot...it's nothing really...I'm fine. You should sit down."

"You are not fine if you were shot...now what is going on? Tell me. I am a grown ass woman and I can handle it. What is wrong and where is your father? He would tell me."

I run a hand through my hair and take a deep breath. "That's just it...dad...he didn't make it back this time."

"Ok...so he will be home later." She looks at me and it's like it all finally clicks in and she slowly sits down of the edge off the couch. "What are you saying Mekhi?" I watch as he eyes start to fill with tears.

"Dad and Oscar Ortega where having words. Apparently dad knew he was. I still can't figure it all out. I keep replaying it all in my head. They were both standing there talking like partners or old friends back in the day." I close my eyes seeing the flashback. I don't want to give her all the details so I don't. "I watched Oscar pull the trigger and I thought dad had him...when he didn't fall I capped his ass right between the eyes."

"And Draven...he is alright; he should be home shortly then."

"That is what I thought too...but they shot at the same time. I thought he missed him but as he slowly turned back to look at me he collapsed on the floor. Mom he is gone...I'm so sorry."I thought she was taking the news rather well until it all sinks in and then she doubles over and lets out this gut wrenching scream. I know the whole fucking house heard as everyone came running into the damn room.

Meagan glares at me with a concerned look. "What is going on? Is it Scarlett?" She runs over to our mom and gets down on her knees beside her. "Mom...mom what is wrong?"Our mom is crying so hard that she can't get the words out. Meagan stands up in my face. "What the fuck did you do this time?"

I try to find the right words but nothing seems right. "Dad is gone...he isn't coming back." Her fists pounds into my chest; she cries louder with each blow and I let her get it all out until she starts to ease up. I hug her close to me and try to calm her down. "Meagan there was nothing that I could have done."

"I can't believe he is never coming back home...why? How?"

"Things just happen alright." I push her away with my good arm and lean down to hug my mom again.

"Mekhi...he was all I loved...he was my life. I knew one day this would happen but I always prayed that it wouldn't ever come to this."

"Mom...I really am sorry...I..."

She stops me. "Stop...I need to be left alone for a while." She stands up and walks out of the room.

I stand back up and see everyone looking at me. I feel that this is all my fault and I should have done something...I should have shot Ortega before anyone had the chance to fight it out. I shake my head and leave the room. Not only do I leave the room, I leave the house all together.

I find myself driving down the road at rapid speeds only to stop at the Master's Den. I walk in and ignore everyone, walking straight to my office. I pour myself a drink and tip it over consuming the whole glass in one gulp and then pour another and another. I haven't been this fucked up in a long while. I hear the door open and I see Nicole standing in the doorway.

She comes in and shuts the door behind her. I try to keep my eyes open as she walks closer over to me and grabs the bottle out of my hand. "Mr. Adler...would you like another bottle or can I get you something else?"

I try to stand up and my balance is off and I come crashing back to the couch. I sway this way and that way. When I look up at her she is smiling back at me. I lean my head back and let it rest on the back of the couch. I feel her straddle me as she sits on my lap. "Mr. Adler...do you want me? I will let you have all of me...if you want it."

She is already practically naked from being downstairs and when she leans in closer to me I can smell her sweet perfume. She rubs her breast up and down my chest. She starts to unbutton my shirt and I feel her hands slide up and down. I let out a groan. It's been months since I have any sex...and my body is very much craving it right now. She gets closer to me and I feel her lips on mine and though they do feel good they are not Scarlett's lips. I feel my pants unbutton and hear the zipper go down. She is almost touching my hardness when I push her off of me. She lands hard on the floor. "What the fuck Mr. Adler...you wanted this?"

"The fuck I do...get the hell out of here." I stand up and wobble to the door and hold it out for her. As she leaves the room I lock the door and head downstairs. I hold on to the rail all the way down. I get in my car and sit there for a few seconds trying to figure out where to put the key. Yeah...I'm that fucked up. I finally figure it out and turn the ignition on; before I can even put it in gear someone is opening the door and glaring down at me. "If you think I am going to let you drive home like this you are mistaken. Get your ass over and let me drive."

"I...I...got d-his maaan." I slur.

"Get your fucking ass over before I force you over. I already have Scarlett in a fucking coma I don't need you in one as well."

I smirk and get out of the car. I have a hard time walking to the other side and I keep leaning into the car. His hands come around me and guild me into the passenger side of the car. He shuts the door and then goes back around and gets it. I watch as all the buildings and lights pass by and I start to feel dizzy so I close my eyes. Once home he gets out of the car and brings me in.

My mom and Meagan run over to me and I push them both away. "Get the fuck off of me...I'm fucking fine."

"No you are not...what happened to you?" Meagan asks.I look down and my shirt is still unbuttoned....along with my pants. I start to smile but then fall over.

I feel him by my side and he tells my mom and Meagan that he is taking me to bed. "Let's just say he had a few drinks...he will be better once he sleeps it off."

"Thank you for not letting him drive home Atticus...I don't know what I would do if I lost him too." My mom says as tears continue to stroll down her face.

 As we are walking up the stairs I stop and look over at him. "Wait...man...I need to see her."

"Not like this you don't."I don't argue with him even though a really want to. He takes me to my room upstairs and helps me onto the bed. Before he leaves he says, "If you ever hurt her...if you ever even think about fucking another girl while she is laying there helpless...I will personally fuck you up. Don't worry what happened tonight stays between us."

"Wait...man...nothing happened?"

"Exactly...and it better stay that way."

 I watch him fade out of the room and I close my eyes.I sleep all of it off. When I wake up, I run to the bathroom and puke. I look up into the mirror and my shirt is still the way it was left. I close my eyes and see her standing in front of me...her touching me...Oh fuck. I turn on the shower and jump in, scrubbing the shit off of my chest...getting her scent off of me. Noting happened...I remember I shoved her off of me...nothing happened.

I get dressed and make my way down stairs. Everyone is sitting at the table eating breakfast. The moment they see me the room goes quite. I walk over and pour myself a cup of steaming black coffee. I sit down at the end of the table and pick up the paper. I set it back down and look at each one of them. "Seriously...don't let me stop you from talking."

"We were just talking about making arrangements to bury your father." My mom says. I look over at her and her eyes are swollen and red from probably crying all night.

"I figured you would want to cremate him...but if you want to bury him fine...we could arrange it."

"I want to see him before telling him a final goodbye if that is possible."

I'm not sure if my mom has ever seen a dead person...maybe she has but this is her husband that we are talking about. "Fine...we can drive over the Crematory. I wasn't sure what you wanted so we placed him there for now."

After breakfast we drive over to her Crematory and we all get out. I have the keys and unlock the door. Meagan looks like she is about to be sick. "Scarlett works in here. I don't see how she does it."

I roll my eyes. Yeah...if you only knew what all Scarlett does...did...whatever. I show them the room and walk over to pull him out of the wall on the steel slap. I uncover his body and he lays there cold and stiff. The color has drained from his body. I step back as the two of them morn over him. My mom leans over him and collapses on his chest and she cries out. I wasn't going to step in but Meagan turns and gives me this look so I move beside her. I pull her back and let her cry into my chest as I hold her.

When she is done with the tears she looks up at me with the big round tear stained eyes and sighs. "Is this where they cremate the body...I think I want to do it."

"Mom..."

"No...this is what he would have wanted...just us here. I said my goodbye." She glances back over to him. "It's alright Mekhi...it's time."

Meagan also gives me a nod and I shake my head. I let go of my mom and cover my dad back up. I motion for the guys to come over and help me lift him up to place him into the pit. We all stand there holding hands and I say a little prayer out loud. "Some saw Draven Adler as a vicious mad man who took his job very seriously while his friends and family saw him as a down to earth family man who would do anything in his power to take care of his loved ones. We never know when our last time will be on this Earth...we never know how our life really impacts others until its too late. Today we stand before you and pray that you will have it in your heart to accept the man that he was and we pray that one day we will be able to walk beside him again. Amen."

I let Atticus shut the door. We all stand back and watch the flames inside the room he is in. I might have said the prayer but the whole time I was thinking about how all of this shit could have been avoided...if only my father would have said something damn him...