Banner By: KaylaKeifer

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Chapter 8

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"Mother, what are we doing for Christmas this year?" I pushed past a few of the of the tourists on the street, heads craned upwards to look at the lights strung through the dead tree branches. I wanted to scream at them to move to the side of the walkway so others could get by. My body was tense with stress as I felt all my tricks were doing no good. Notes just were not enough and I was beginning to worry that maybe I just couldn't please Amber.

"Oh darling, we are having our Christmas get together like we do every year..." I couldn't help but drown my mother's words out, even though I was really trying to focus. I knew exactly what they were doing for Christmas and I had hoped I would be bringing a guest with me. I shook my head at the ground, my gloves gripping the phone placed to my ear tightly. Last thing I wanted to do right now was to drop it. I bumped into an older couple quickly sending them muffled apologies. I really wasn't doing the best right now. "Your father is going to cook a turkey this year since we think we will have enough of the grand kids."

I couldn't help but smile at how excited my mother sounded. She really did love when everyone was around and honestly, that was the best part of Christmas. Sipping on some hot chocolate, hanging out by a fire with your family. I knew calling my mom was a good thing to do, as it helped relieve a lot of the stress I was feeling. Even if it was only for a quick moment.

"Oh, is Jenny bringing her kids this year? Last year didn't they just stop by for a moment, then leave to celebrate it on their own?" I questioned trying to make some conversation with my mother. There were people yelling and everyone walking on the hard snow was making it difficult to hear her, so I slowed my pace until I arrived at the store.

"Yeah, she has the kids this year!" My mother seemed to be thrilled by my older sister bringing her kids. This only happened every other year as she was divorced. A pain entered my heart as I thought about my dear sister's relationship and how it had gone south. I felt bad for the children having to endure Christmas without both of their parents.

" It will be really good to see her. I feel like I haven't seen her in years." I looked around my eyes searching the crowd for nothing in particular until they were distracted by a couple standing together under a bundle of mistletoe. The gentleman leaned in giving the girl he was with a kiss before pulling away and staring at her lovingly. My heart was filled with emotion again, both good and bad. I wanted to jump with joy at the thought that, that could be Amber and I very soon, my mind would race at the idea of kissing her. On the other hand, I knew that once this was over, she might not be interested in me the way I wanted her to. Maybe I would never get the chance to hold her like he held his girl. "Hey, mother..."

"Yeah, sweetie?" She questioned, her tone more worried than before.

"If dad got you the perfect present for Christmas, what would it be?" I could almost imagine her shrugging on the other end of the line, thinking very carefully about my question.

"Honestly, I just really want his attention." I could tell she was telling the truth but it didn't help me like I had hoped she would. I wasn't ready to explain the situation to my mother so I decided to just drop it there. "Why do you ask? Are you trying to impress some girl? Honey, you haven't brought a girl around in a while."

I immediately tried to back out of the conversation. She didn't need to know what I was doing. I didn't want to tell anyone else in case Amber wasn't as fond of the idea as I was. I tried to think of a response to pull her off the trail.

"No, I was just trying to figure out what I was going to get you. I have to go. Love you, I'll talk to you later." I felt bad for rushing the rest of the conversation but I just couldn't tell her.

"Oh, uh, okay love you too." I quickly hung up the phone before she could say anything else and I entered the store. I needed to find something simple and sweet that I could give to Amber. My mother hadn't been helpful as Amber already had every ounce of my attention, even if she didn't know she did.

I glanced around the store for a few moments trying to figure out where I wanted to start. I didn't want to get her any clothes as I didn't want to guess her size wrong, nor did I know what she wanted or needed. I decided that was a bad idea. I thought about maybe getting her a ring but that seemed too serious, nobody said it had to be an engagement ring, but I wasn't even ready for that.

I shook my head as the frustration was returning. I took a couple deep breaths before putting my head down and taking twenty steps in a straight line. I figured I would start wherever I ended up. When I finally opened my eyes, I thanked God for allowing me to make it the distance without running into any of the bustling Christmas shoppers. I searched around the store immediately embarrassed at how many people probably just witnessed me taking a shot in the dark.

I found myself standing in front of a rack with what seemed like a million necklaces. They ranged from silver to gold, metals that were non-allergenic, it seemed like there were so many options I began to get flustered. I kneel down to begin searching for the perfect one. They weren't expensive, only around twenty bucks. That was something I could manage.

It didn't take long before my eyes hovered over the perfect necklace. I pulled it off the shelf taking one last look at it before I decided it was indeed one she would like. I felt proud of myself taking it up to the check stand. I was able to breathe once I left the store, thankful that it hadn't taken too long to find something. I checked my watch, the time read a quarter past eight and the sky was pitch black. The only light coming from the lampposts standing tall.

I searched the sky looking for any sign of the moon, but all I could see where tiny little snowflakes gracefully making their way to the earth. I smiled to myself reaching in my pocket to pull the note out. I couldn't wait to give these to her tomorrow.

Day 5

You're a beautiful snow storm

The one that makes it feel like drinking hot chocolate

Glistening and sparkling in the sky

And it's truly what makes Christmas so special

I just hope this year you will make mine special.

Your Secret Santa