Hello everyoneee

Surprise!! Surpriseee!!

I am back with an Intense Emotional 7.5k plus Updateee!!

As I was itching to write out this Chapter – my Fingers Just Flew Over The Keypad.

I haven't proofread – so please ignore editing errors.

And obviously guys the Chap starts with a Glimpse into everything that was Going through in Khushi's head too as Arnav Confessed – only fair that I bring her Emotions out into the Pitcure too...and it Continues On..Offcourse.

And I shall let you all Dive in without Further Delay.

.......................

EPISODE 12 - ENGULFED INTO THE BLACK HOLE OFF 'OUR INTENSE CHAOTIC'...EMOTIONS

KHUSHI'S ROOM - 1306

KHUSHI'S POV

The Minute, Arnav pulled me back, close into him in The Desert, and Hugged me by wrapping His Arms around my Waist so so possessively – I had known that I couldn't Escape from That Moment in between of Us, or From Him.

And I had felt Exhaustion take over My Heart , as I had asked him what did he want from Me??

What I didn't know – that the Answer or Rather the Confession , he was going to Make Next , would snatch open the ground from underneath My Feet.

Because that is exactly what I felt – when he Started to tell about the Way he, had been Holding On to My Memories.( And this is Precisely the only reason why I stayed in his Arms that way, because if I moved, I would have Faltered in my Feet Surely – that's how Shaken I was)

I couldn't believe what I was Hearing.

I felt like I was Hallucinating.

But his Embrace around my Waist – Took me Back into the Reality again as I absorbed the fact that, it was Really Happenening.

And in that very Minute – as the Ground had been Snatched Away from My Feet, it had also literally Unmasked my Raw and Vulnerable Emotions for this Man, in my Heart in that very Moment – as I processed the facts, he'd been stating to me, for This was Him Telling Me something that I had been doing for HIM – all these years.

Holding onto His Memories, Our Memories.

Reliving them in Private Vulnerable Moments.

He Called Me and My Memories – a Freaking Blissfull Oasis amidst his Otherwise Deserted Heart!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Dammit.

And right then, something in my Heart had rung a Bell So Strong as it told me that – maybe, just maybe – there was a Very Strong Possibility that He had realised His Feelings for Me TOO.I had a intuition telling me in that very moment – that there could be a Possibility that My Perceptions, in my Gut,in my Heart back then for what he Felt for me, were Probably Right All Along.

And I was Scared over what he was Going to Keep Saying Next – so so so scared, because I I didn't know how to React to this at all, it literally came across to me as a – Totally Unexpected Scenario.

Well – thank God that Mia's call came then and broke the Moment and I ran my way to them, without even looking at him, because I most definitely couldn't have him see My Face, until I could Mask My Vulnerability, which thankfully I was able to then Cover Up with the mask off Casual Pretence by the time we Got into the Car and made our way too the Resort.

And offcourse, the minute we reached our Resort, I ran out at the Speed of light towards my Room, because I definitely needed some alone time to just recompose my emotions for a bit, because I knew – he was not going to let this Go.

I knew Very well – that He was Going to Seek me out again.

I know his – Obstinate Stubborn Gene Very Well.

But luckily in that time, that I had in some solace as I sat under the Shower, crying and exhausted because off the Conflict within me, I had been able to compose myself immediately , as I let my mind resort to temporary comfort off denial for a couple of minutes as I told my Heart over and Over again – that this was all about his Angst and Guilt.

And once I was out of the shower, I got on a quick call with Mia offcourse, quickly filling her up over everything that hapeened, and also confided in her that I was feeling very Scared over just Hearing him out more on this, because I absolutely had no clue as To what It was going to Make me Feel – for it felt like it was going to throw me off all My Balance that I was trying very had to keep a Focus on , anyway.Mia had calmly heard me out offcourse, and then she had encouraged me to atleast hear him out completely, as she stated, that its only Fair to listen to the Complete Side off someones Point off View too Right?

And I knew she was right.

And that is why I had agreed to see Him Again.

And Just the Look on His Face as he Entered into my room, penetrated through my Soul so Deep, for it Told me in My Gut – that Letting him in Now – was probably going to lead to a Unbolting off a Huge Pandora's Box of a NEWER CRAZIER CHAOS for Me.

And well – that was Exactly What Happened.

And I tried – really Hard.

Really Hard to Just Keep on My Pretence.

I tried to Keep my Calm, as he flung His Phone into my Hands asking me too open it up with a Passcode which was the day we first met, even though everything inside off me was shaking with emotion as the Realisation struck that – His Passcode was The Same as MIne???

I tried to keep onto My Calm – as he opened up A Secret Folder , showing me the various albums of my Photos, Our Photos, Videos, stating that these were the Memories he lived with, saving up the Data so so carefully – even though every bitt off me within was shaking with emotion at the Realisation – that He had A Secret Folder Holding Our Memories Too??

But my Calm Started Weakenening – when he Showed me the Laminated Soft Copy of my Last Letter to Him.

And It shook me with the first blow of Vulnerability – as I took his phone in my hands and Read through it Again.

But then – I still tried to Escape him and hold onto my calm and composure(because of the truths of my reality today, even though by now my heart was already Yelling at me from within to Just let Him say it all, because it felt like it would lead me to a Moment, I had probably thought I would never Experience in my Life, the moment my Heart had been secretly aching and longing for all these years)– and that's why I tried walking away from him again, that's why I told him that maybe This Really was all about Angst and Guilt.

I Gave It My Best Shot – as Bravely as I could , until he Hugged me that way to Himself and stated - " take a freaking knife and shove it down my freaking heart right now...kill me if you want Khushi..but don't walk away from me without hearing me out....actually id rather prefer dying at your hands than to see the sight off you walking away from me right now...or this casual aloofness that you are trying to shove down my face...I know...you can perceive and sense what im trying to imply to you..i know...I know it..i just know it...but your minds probably trying to play with you...as its remind you off the things I did to mock your perceptions back then in the past...khushi...."

That.Was My.Last.Straw.

Because the Pain in His Voice – Killed Me.

Why did he have to say things Like – Stab My Heart with a Knife Dammit, but don't walk away!

Why did he Have to Talk about Dying at my Hands?

Was he Insane?

He's the only One I have ever Loved or Will Love.

Truly.

Madly.

Deeply.

My Heart literally Went all Rogue on The Mask I was Trying to Hold on too.

And just like that My Mask came off, the very next second, as he Cupped my face to make me look into his vulnerable, emotionally overwhelmed eyes, a expression my eyes were surely mirroring, as I stammered – " are...you...crazy...whhhy..would..you talk about things like stab a knife through my heart and stuff...look at how melodramatic Arnav 2.0 has become...fine..im listening to you...I wont walk away..."

And the Minute the words - " its not about angst or guilt Khushi...that's just a little part off it...its about Love dammit." – left His Mouth, I stumbled back in my Steps voicing a – "what??? What did you just say ???", in a Dazed Shock , All Shakened within Until My Back Hit the Wall, because I couldn't believe that I had Just Heard the word , Love out off His Mouth for Me, for Real.

He said – This was All About Love.

Love.

He Loved Me?????????????????

The only Person I have ever Loved, the only one for whom my Heart ever Beat that way for, the only one I had felt my heart always Long for, secretly in all these years too – Loved me Back too????????? He had been Longing and Aching for me as much Too – if not more.???????

I couldn't believe the way he had Slumped down to His Knees in Front off Me, with so much emotion shining in his eyes and Face as he Started Confessing his Side off the Tale to me – everything that he went through after the Day I left London – until now.

And I can most definetly hear everything he's telling me, as Tears start to leave his eyes – as he Relives it all in those moments of raw and vulnerable confession out to me , still very much on his knees.

I had never in my million zillion gazillion Dreams ever imagined that I would ever Hear what I was Hearing.

That's why I have to Bring In a Context Here – so that I can word out what I am kind off Feeling right now.

So.

When I bumped into Arnav again, in the present – days ago in the Elevator, I had Felt all of My Insides Freeze to the Freezing Point off Liquid Bloody Nitrogen!!

Guys...I hope you Remember?

I most definitely Remember – this very thought crossing through my Mind.

The Scientist in Me , would Just Like to Point out – that the Freezing Point off Liquid Bloody Nitrogen = - 210 in Degree Celcius,which equals to – 346 in Degree Farenhiet.

But.

Nope.

Even That Comparison, cannot Suit the Point at The Which My Insides Stay Frozen – as I try to digest and process everything Arnav is telling me, and I feel myself Slump Down to My very own Knees in a Dazed shock before I ask him to Stop Crying that way in front off me , because it was Killing me so so so much to see him that way as I realised the gravity off the emotions he's been through, tears leaving my own eyes before I return to being Statued like a Metal Statue to My Spot,(at a Freezing Point off – Minus - 500 degree Celcius maybe) on My Knees too, against this wall , across from Arnav, the only bodily reflex, continuously giving away the fact that my Mind is ON A BOILING POINT - is the fact that, I have a Fountain or rather a Waterfall of, Tears Rolling Down My Cheeks.

For the Information my Mind and My Heart has received and is in the Process of Digesting and Accepting has Sent My Mind and Heart into a Heated BOIL of Emotions.Its all Raging inside off MY Head at Heart at a BOILING POINT OF TITANIUM MAYBE?(which is = 3287 Degree Celcius....)

Or Nooooo!!!

Its all BOILING UP TO THE BOILING POINT OF THE CHEMICAL ELEMENT TUNGSTEN – WHICH IS SAID TO HAVE THE HIGHEST BOILING POINT OFF , 5,555 Degree Celcius.

So basically – right Now outwardly all of my Being is Frozen to a Point off – 500 degree Celcius, and inwardly the Emotions in my Heart and the Thoughts in my Head have reached A Boiling Point off 5,555 Degree Celcius, which means – that No Masks off Calm or Composure are going to be able to come to My Rescue – as I sit in this raw and vulnerable emotional, State in Front off Arnav, on my Knees , crying my Heart out – just Holding his Gaze, nonetheless, unable to look away from his eyes - For, he is literally like in the Same Condition as Me Right now – more like a Mirror Image off Me – in this very moment off time, as we sit in front off each other Totally ENGULFED INTO THE BLACKHOLE OFF OUR EMOTIONS.

( Scientific Context – in Science, we say that A Black Hole is a region of Spacetime where Gravity is so so so Strong, that literally nothing , no particles, or even electromagnetic radiation, such as Light Can Escape from IT)

That's Why I Used the Term – Black Hole off Our Emotions.

Because this moment in between of us, right is literally so so so so Strong in its Gravity in between off us – that None off us will be able to Escape From It.

I most Definetly don't Have it in Me too.

What do I do?

What do I say to Him??

I don't even know how many minutes have passed, as we'v stayed statued like this on our knees, just Crying in silence in front off one another?

I have no Clue over what the Sense off the Movement off Time – actually.

Right then , I see Arnav take a deep breathe as he gets up from his spot and walks upto where I am, and to my dazed surprise again, he kneels down in front off me , and he cups my face with both his hands so tenderly, and he wipes the tears streaming down both my cheeks with his thumbs and he whispers hoarsely, in a raw, and deep and sincere tone – " I love you Khushi...iv always loved you...always...now you know what I truly meant by when I told you that a part of me came back to life when I found you alive...I didn't want to overwhelm you then so suddenly, so I just made it seem like it was about the guilt and angst, which was true too, but that's just a minute part off it all khushi...my heart came back to life Khushi...I came back to life...when I found you alive...and know this now that I have found you...it just took me minutes to fall in love with you in the present day today...over and over again...even though technically, its just been maybe like what three days since we met again...but days and time in its usual sense doesn't even matter in here Khushi...because irrespective off the fact that you were not technically physically in my reality for these years, you were still always there..i have kept you alive in me..in my reality nonetheless...youv never been my past khushi...youv always been everything...my past, my present and my future too...you are everything to me Khushi, the central axis my heart rotates and revolves around ever since it first met you...what I feel for you in my heart, in my being is so so so freaking intense, and to be honest it only grew a million times more intense in all this time away from you even though I believed you were gone..and iv loved you insanely nonetheless in my own twisted ways...iv held on to you...you know khushi every day , every night as I would revisit our memories, I wouldn't just send apologies you way...everytime I would send out my emotions too...my love for you...thinking that you are watching over me from above...you would now know it all...that you would know how I sorry I was...you would know how much I love you...there were times I would just look up at the stars and talk to you...have conversations with you...I never stopped loving you Khushi...not even for a single nanosecond and my decision to stay loyal to just you all this while literally seemed like a way off reflecting it all out to you..because it felt like, even if I think off anyone else...it would taint the precious memories I have of you...of Us...and that's why when I found you...when I first saw you in the elevator, I paled and dazed like that Khushi...because off all these overwhelming emotional journey I have been through all these years..." , and he pauses, taking a deep breathe but he he keeps his gaze locked with my emotional ones.

I cant stop these flow off tears.

He has No idea what he id Doing to Me Right now???

By telling me all of This...

He had held on to my That way????

He had Held onto the Love for me – In his Heart in a way that was so so Beautiful...even though he believed I was Gone – he felt that by Reliving our memories and Being Loyal to me Nonetheless was His way off Loving Me Insanely???

He felt I was watching Over Him – from the Skies.

So I would Know – Everything.

No wonder I saw a flash off anger through his eyes, when he spotted me in the Elevator.

Now it falls into Place.

It was Only Natural for Him to feel that, after all that emotional journey.

Arnav is looking at me in a searching gaze as he's probably trying to comprehend whats on my mind or as to why I am all silent and I feel his one hand lace brush back my hair and tuck it behind my ear tenderly and he asks – " Khushi...please...say something...anything...react..please???im sorry Khushi...so so so sorry for it all..for everything that happened back then...please give me a chance to make It up to you in the present day today...please take me back...Give US a Chance...Be with me Please.....ill do anything...im ready to give it my all...ill love you so much that it will make you fall in love with me in the present day too, all over again...I know that I have to work very hard to bring up that soft corner for me, that I hope still resides somewhere still in your heart...but im ready to do just about everything khushi...I beg you..to give us another chance...pleaseee..."

My eyes widen at that even more as The Truth of my Reality Comes back to My Head.

How do I tell him??

How can I tell him the Truth right now???

Right now I can't.

I just can't.

It will drive us both Crazy with Vulnerability.

We are already on the Brink off it in the BLACK HOLE OFF OUR EMOTIONS – as the tale off Our Love – Lost Over Time, Finally is all Bare in front off US.

But wait.

No.

He's bared it all out to Me.

I want to Give him a little Context in all that my Hearts felt for him too all this While.

But how?

I am speechless.

I am unable to say anything.

The Discussions of our Reality can come into the Picture in a while, because right now I feel in my heart – that I owe this moment in time to the Khushi and Arnav – from eight years ago.

Arnav's wipes the fresh string of tears that have left my eyes again as he looks at me puzzled and confused , distress evident on his face – " Khushi...please...your silence is killing me...right now...say something...please....anything at all....please...dammit...talk...",and a two lone tears escape his eyes again.

My hands act on reflex now as I cup his Face tenderly too with both my hands and I wipe his tears just like he'd wiped mine and I whisper honestly in a broken and vulnerable voice – " im sorry...I am...so so so sorry...Arnav..i never knew...I never knew..",and I pause as I close my eyes and a fresh string off tears leave my eyes.

Arnav keeps a finger over my lips immediately as he says – " shhh..shh...say anything but sorry to me dammit...please...you don't owe me any apology at all khushi... I understand...your side off it...I know why you never looked back... I never gave any reason too...and its literally my fault that these eight year time line comes to lie in between of us this way anyway..because believe if id known earlier that you were alive...I would have come to you, seeked you out a long time ago...ages ago..and everything that's happening right now in this momet, would have happened...long long ago...",and he instantly pulls me into a Hug as he says holding onto me tight – " but its better late than never right?? Khushi???please give me one chance..a second shot to make it up to you...to US...my heart will stop working this very moment if you push me away right now...please don't..push me away...Khushi please hug me back....just hold me for a while too...please?? Iv been dying to feel you wrap your arms around me...please....i mean it when I say this Khushi...I just don't have it in me to go on longer without you..now that I have found you...I can't ever let you go...id rather die...I swear to god...id rather die..."

Why does he have to Keep saying – that He'd Rather Die.

Why does he have to Talk about Dying – over and over again.

It makes me so so Vulnerable.

It's pushing me over the Edge – so much so that I don't care about any other Adverse Reality right now.

I feel like I Need these Moments with Him – as Bad Too.

How can I not give into my Flow of Emotions that I feel in my Heart for this Man right now????

I hope its ok to be a Little Selfish when it comes to the matters off My ICU-ed Heart, and just tell him how I feel and shift and postpone the talk to the present and Reality – for a little Later?

Like Maybe Tomorrow Morning – after I think it all Through with a Fresh Head keeping in mind, the situation off our pained hearts - during my SkyDiving Time??

Ill surely be able to Come with a Solution maybe?

And so – I Decide to Just let It all GO Now as I find my self giving in to My heart's needs as I finally start to sob hopelessly in his arms now, hugging him back now hard too clutching onto his tee near his heart like I used to in the past and I whisper brokenly to his heart, honestly – " please...Arnav...please...don'..t...ever...talk..about...dying...please...I cannot..even imagine existing in the world in which you aren't.....and all this while...iv been able to go on in the ways I have been...becau..se of Your Memories too...Our memories..our happy memories...iv held on to them...to your Memories so godammit tight..and so so so preciously too...iv lived with them...just like you...reliving it all each day... because somewhere in my heart I was always swinging in between the perceptions that my Heart held onto and had felt nonetheless, along with the ways in which I had always loved you... and the reality of what happened back then...but then..still in the end...I couldn't ever get to the Hate or dislike spectrum for you ever..iv always held onto you too in my own twisted ways..." and I pause, as I feel my Heart burst up with a emotion so strong as I finally start letting it out to him, as My heart now starts feel like as if I just handed it a pair off wings.

Arnav pulls me up now as he cups my face, his eyes widened in a daze surprise as he asks – " whattt??what did you just say?? You'v always held on to my memoories too ?? held on to me...Always??After all that happened?? Still?? I mean you didn't know my side off the story...for all these years..but still???didn't you ever hate me for real??like never??? Didn't you ever feel like wanting to seek me out and throw tons off bricks up my head...to shout at me...to scream at me...to slap me for hurting you so bad that way????i know the things I did back then surely made you feel betrayed...but even then...you left me such a beautiful letter...full off your unconditional love shining through it all for me...please answer me Khushi...please tell me what's it been in your heart..please???ever since you left? I want to know everything...pleaseeeeee...dammit...please...whats it been for you ..for all these years with respect to the matters off the heart...please????but im sure there was anger and hurt in there too for me...you should have freaking slapped me dammit....you know what..slap me now...slapppp me now....just take it all out on me Khushi...take it all out..."

I take a deep breathe as I decide to Tell him part off it all without Letting on the Truth of my Medical Condition yet, because just the thought off letting it all out to him, makes my ICU-ed Heart Feel a Lot Lighter and I pick up my right hand that was cupping his face and pull it back in a gesture as if I was truly going to slap him , and I see him close his eyes on reflex, embracing for impact and my hand pauses in mid air, as a sad smile comes up my face and I just cup his cheek back with the Same hand back , and rub on it gently as I admit honestly, tears flowing down my eyes – " I can't...I cant slapp...you...I couldn't ever then..and I can't...now...",and he opens his eyes now and looks at me earnestly as he says – " but I deserve it Khushi...for hurting you that way...."

I put my fingers on his lips now as I say honestly – " shh...just sh...pleaseee...you'v repented enough...Arnav...its done..the past...its gone...iv truly forgiven you...and how do you even think I can slap you now...specially now that I know that you'v been as hurt and pained as me ...in all these eight years if not probably more...because I atleast knew that you were out there..all safe and sound.......and hence...I would always wish well for you....i would pray for your Happiness nonetheless...but....."

And I feel myself now sit back on my calves on reflex now for we'd been kneeling down forever, and Arnav says, holding onto my hand – " come lets go to the sofa..."

I nod.

And he holds my hand and walks me to the Sofa and we sit on the bigger sofa, facing each other and he asks – " can I please hold onto your hand as we talk?? Please????"

I place a cushion over my lap, as I lean back into the sofa and I see him lean sideways into the Sofa side a little too as hes sitting right in front off me and I nod at him, and he instantly laces his hand through mine, and keeps his gaze locked with me again as he asks – " but..what??? you paused at but..Khushi..."

I take a deep breathe as I continue, filtering out my medical condition bits again – " well offcourse it did take me a while to get to that point Arnav...because since I am letting this all out to you...I do want to tell you...that for the first year after we parted...there was obviously a lot of feeling of hurt, of betrayal too, off anger...somewhere in the deep corners off my heart...as it refused to process how harshly you chose to end things....there was all of that...yes...but there was still never any dislike or hate...a lot of hurt and pain yes...for sure..truckloads off it...and that's majorly the reason why I never looked back for all these years...why I never called you...even when I lied down in the hospital bed alone after my appendicitis surgery...I preferred being alone...the pain off heartbreak and the hurt was the reason...why I never seeked you out...because no matter what I felt in my heart... my mind would always come in to remind me what happened towards the end...and that's what made me think...that maybe it wouldn't matter to you anyway if I was dead or alive...so it was probably better that you thought im dead anyway...but then eventually a year down the line I just figured out that embracing it all and accepting it nonetheless would make it easier to just live on with it all...for I realised that even though I was in so much pain because off the heartbreak and hurt...there was still never any hate or dislike for you in my heart.and that is when I started to work on forgiveness...forgiving myself...you...for our immature flaws..forgiving situations.....to forgive the twist of time and destiny...to accept fate..."

Arnav looks at me puzzled as he asks – " what do you mean by the latter? Forgiving situations...to forgive the Twist of time, and destiny and fate??why does it feel like theres something more in here..."

A sad smile curves up my lips on reflex as I realise that maybe it should be better to give him a little hint about the reality before revealing more about my hearts emotions for him, because I know he is going to get all emotional on me again, making me pour out my heart to him anyway, and I take a deep breathe as I clutch on his hand, that was laced with mine – " because there is...there is something more...something very very serious... Arnav...that has changed me a lot...in many vital ways...over these years...and I just think that I need some more time maybe..before I can open upto you about it....completely...."

Arnav clutches on my hand as he states sincerely, almost immediately – " ill win your trust back..ill win your heart back..all I need is one chance...ill love you so much that one day...you will be comfortable enough to open up to me about it....khushi you are going to give me another chance right?? Please????be mine khushi...my khushi...you'v always been just mine just like iv been your Arnav...only yours..ever since I first met you...give us another chance please......"

I lone tear escapes my eye, which I wipe with my other free Hand as I admit, clutching on his hand – " Arnav...to be honest...I don't know about that...yet...because its very complicated for me...I am not the same Khushi anymore...I am not the same...Khushi you knew back then...I am not...I don't know if I have it in me to step into relationships...I don't...I was honest about it to you on the very first day over dinner that...I just don't want to settle down in terms off my Life that way anymore...please understand...no matter what I feel...in my heart...theres a strong part in my Reality today that I cannot ignore...i...i...don't..think...I can...be your Khushi...ever..in that way...ever again....no matter what I feel in my heart....im sorry..i m so sorry...",and I pause,as I feel fresh tears ooze out my eyes.

I see Raw Anguish Flash Through Arnav's eyes instantly as he pulls me by the hand, throws the cushion off my lap aside and his hands go into my hair as he clutches it gently in a fist and he whispers looking deep into my eyes – " I know...theres something which is disturbing you a lot right now...something I know you will open up to me about when you think you are comfortable...but know this...whatever it is ...I don't freaking care....i want you back....for you are Mine...you are my Khushi...you still aree....for its your Heart and soul that I care about the most...and in your heart and soul...you are still the same Khushi...I first met on the September 6, 2011, the same Khushi I fell in love with...the same khushi I lost to my very own stupidities and then to twists of time..but eight years later...as I sit in front off you today and finally that mask off vulnerability is off your eyes , I can read every freaking emotion swimming in them....for your eyes are a window to your soul Khushi...they always have been...and right now...all I can see is emotion swimming in them for me too....i know you still feel something for me...I know you might not be in love with me like I am in the present day today..but I know theres something in there...in some corner...I know you feel something surely ....i just know you do...that's why you said...no matter what I feel...you know what I'm more interested to first know what you feel....tell me what do you feel as you look into my eyes right now...tell me if what you feel in your heart is not the same...", he pauses, as his gaze turns more intense.

Why ?

Just Why??

Just why do I have to be this Doomed when it Comes to Him???

Im back to being Combusted and Absored and Engulfed within the Black Hole off Our Emotions.

See this is what I Meant.

I knew he's going to Go all Emotional on Me Again.

Damm Stubborn and Obstinate – His Raizada Gene Is.

I whisper looking away from his eyes , as I look down, tears rolling down my cheeks– " Arnav ..please...you don't..know....please...theres so much you don't know...please don't look at me that way right now...please ..."

He pulls me more closer into him as his other hand also clutches into my hair from the other side as he whispers – " I am now going to kiss your tears away....don't stop me please???i should have freaking always kissed your every tear away...let me kiss your tears away khushi...please?? I want to make up for every tear you'v ever shed because off me??"

Oh no.

If He Does That – ill Drown into a Further Emotional Doom.

I will fall in Love with Him – in this very Moment off time.

Again.

But MY Heart Goes all Rogue on me as I just feel it Instruct My Head to Just nod, (I have no clue how that Movement off my Head happened, for I am in such a Daze of what I am feeling after ages in my Heart),and just as I nod, Arnav closes his lips over the tears over cheeks, kissing them away before trailing tender kisses up my cheek towards My right eye and he Kisses on it.

And I Fall in Love with Him.

Again.

He turns to kiss my tears away trailing down my left cheeks too, and he closes his lips tenderly over my left eye,again.

I fall in love with Him.

Again.

Tears keep Rolling Down my Cheeks Over and Over Again.

And he keeps Kissing them Away.

Damm Him.

I don't know how many minutes have Passed again.

I keep Crying, and he Keeps Kissing My Tears Away – every single Tear that Leaves MY Eye.

And what seems like Ages later, I feel him lean to my ear, as he whispers, emotion evident in his voice, clutching on my hair tight in both his hands – "and I will say this again...Khushi... I don't care whatever this thing is that is worrying you...but know this...nothing's going to stop me from coming after you now...ill chase you down to the end off the Globe I have too...because either I am going to live the rest off my life with you in it...or im most sure, my heart will give up on me in sleep tonight itself..if I tell it that it might have to go on without you....i don't have it me to go on without you ever...again...I told you id rather have you stab me with a knife through my Heart...id rather die...you freaking might as well just kill me...."

Whats Up with Him Dammit.

Again.

He brings this UP.

I think I know why he is brining it Up.

He Knows it will Push me Over to the Edge off My Emotions.

And it does.

For My Heart Guides me to Instantly clutch Both my Hands in his hair too, just like he had his hands clutched into mine and I look into his eyes as I say angrily – " you talk about this ever dying, killing business once more , I swear to all my Scientists Gods...that im going to freaking Slap You So Godammit Hard...then..."

He pulls my head closer towards him by a Push off his hand as he whispers, hovering close to my Lips – " you know what...back then I would always think...that I would ask me to give me Hundred slaps...as a way to beg for your forgiveness....but now...I think we owe something else to the Arnav and Khushi from eight years ago...so that we are able to help start Healing all that pent up grief from the past...only you can heal me dammit....only we can heal each other dammit Khushi......"

I shiver.

Why is he Looking At My Lips that way right now.

For I know that Look in his eyes.

He's going to Kiss Me.

I know.

Goddamit.

I cant escape this Moment.

My heart wont let Me.

Guys – in my defence – I haven't been Kissed By him , in eight Long Years.

I haven't been Freaking kissed At all – in Eight Long Years.

I haven't kissed anyone in – eight long years.

And right then his thumb comes to brush my lips tenderly as he whispers looking into my eyes – " I haven't kissed you, in freaking eight godammit aching painful years...you haven't kissed me in eight godammit years...we haven't kissed anyone in eight godammit years....we couldn't ever move on Khushi from each other...we want to move on from our flaws don't we? Youv forgiven me for real...im working on forgiving myself too....but all this pent up emotion for each other that wev held onto for all these years, being loyal to each others memories...isn't that a reason enough to give ourselves another shot in here...our hearts a chance to feel alive again....and I never thought id ever get to kiss you again dammit...I need to kiss you right now...please....and I want to kiss you all night....a hundred kisses,instead of those hundred slaps maybe... a thousand kisses Khushi...id like to just kiss you all night....please...let me..."

I look into his eyes nervously as I stammer in a hoarse voice, my eyes closing on reflex as his thumb continues to caresses my lips– " Arn..av...please...if you kiss me now...you will unlock a Pandora's box off Chaos over us all over again...im telling you....im not the same Khushi...anymoreee...."

I don't open my eyes.

I keep them Closed.

I hear him whispers, feeling his breathe over my Lips – " oh aren't you? you are still trembling in the circle off my arms...right now...like you were trembling the very first time...I kissed you....your lips our still quivering the same way, as they would every time I caressed them back in the past....and I am very very sure...that the feel off your Lips under mine, is going to make me feel the same emotions I would feel every time I would kiss you back then...I just didn't know that it was backed by true and pure love then Khushi...but I know now...please...let me kiss you...with this realisation off my true and intense love for you..pleasee...."

I cant fight what My Heart wants Right Now.

I Just Can't.

And the words leave my mouth on Impulse, the same words I stammered to them nervously to him with my eyes closed, the very first time he was about kiss me , all those years ago, knowing that he would Catch on the Memory instantly – " Mr...Tycoon...i...i..."

And before even a tiny breathe could escape my lips, his Lips Closed over Mine almost Immediately , as he continued to Fuse them Over Mine, in soft and gentle Kisses, the emotion he was pouring into it – was unbelievably Intense, and on reflex, I feel my hands clutch on his hair, as I start to Kiss Him Back too.

And just as I open my lips to kiss him back, I feel him Push Me Back into the Sofa as his one hand goes around my Waist and he pulls me closer into him, his other hand cupping my face gently too he probes his way into My lips even deeper, as he starts to kiss me hard and I feel my lips start responding too him, as they match his moves perfectly, if they were gleeing in being able to relive the memory of being kissed by Arnav and kissing Arnav for real, after eight long years and the next thing I know is that our Kiss has Turned into a Scortchingly Passionate deep One as we Duel for Dominance over each others kiss.

He continues Kissing me Madly.

I continue to kiss him Madly too.

I can feel him pour all the Intense emotions, ache, longing, pain , and angst off all these Years Lost in between of Us into this Already Scortchingly Heated deep prolonged french kiss (I can sense it because I am doing the same too)that just Turned very very Emotionall and Poignant as he's slowing in his Movements over my Lips every couple of seconds, before returning to Kissing me Hard and Bad again. And what seems like ages later, I finally break apart from his lips to Catch on my Breathe and we open our eyes at the same time and I gaze into his emotional ones as I admit honestly– " I sense..d...your...emotions...Arna..v...I did...you shouldn't have ki...ssed..me like...that....you have no idea...the chaos you'v unleashed..."

And I feel him tighten his hold on my waist now possessively as he whispers looking into my eyes intently, hovering over my lips closely again – " that's precisely why I need to kiss you again...you felt the emotion...yeah?didn't you? know what that's just the beginning off it...now feel this...",and he kissed me almost instantly, very very hard and deep, and very very emotionally again, and I could only pour in my emotions into the kiss too as I kissed him back too with equal fervour and ache, and about fifteen heated scortching minutes later, we break away to catch on our breathes and I open my eyes to look into his emotionally wet ones and I whisper into his lips, my hand going up to wipe the tear outta the corner off his eye - " I can't...see...you...cry...Arnav...I can't...."

And a overwhelmed tear leaves my eye too ,and he wipes it away too just like I was wiping his away hovering over my lips and he whispers – " and I am going to make sure...that I absorb all your tears into Mine..Khushi...I love you dammit...I love you so so much....will you please call me...My Mr Tycoon...please?? Like you would in the past??Just once??"

And I brush my fingers over his lips tenderly as I whisper– "My Mr Tycoon...."and I was kissed immediately again, hard, and deep, urgent and bad, and I felt my legs go around his waist on its own accord as I pulled him closer into me , and continued to kiss him back too as if some sort of a madness had possessed me too.

HE WAS GOING TO KISS ME THIS WAY ALL NIGHT – I KNEW.

JUST LIKE I KNEW – I WAS GOING TO KISS HIM BACK ALL NIGHT TOO.

I think Some Sort off a Crazy Madness haS Possessed US Both.

A MADNESS – THAT'S ENGULFED US DEEP AND BAD INTO THE CLUTCHES OFF THE FREAKING BLACK HOLE OFF OUR INTENSE CHAOTIC EMOTIONS.

..............................

TADAAAAA!!!

LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU ALL THINK.

I shall now Update this around Tuesday Next Week Guys.

Thanks for all the love and Support.

Much Love Guys.

Always.

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