Marinette's POV

"Are you sure it's a declaration of war? It could just be a prank?" I ask and Adrien just gives me a 'you dumb?' look before he replies.

"You got shot in the head- Lila tried to KILL you. That's not a prank Mari." Has Adrien made a good point? yes. Does that mean I think it's war? No.

"Well, how do you know she wants to go to war?" A light bulb practically appears above his head as he grabs a paper out of his pocket and hands it to me.

"This got sent to you while you were blacked out."

The paper is plain looking but it smells like salt, a choice Lila made to clearly show that she's salty about existing. It's only got a few words on it but the message is clear,

'I shot you, you absolute tampon. Gimme the kingdom or I will shank you bruv.'

"Adrien this is horrible, a war will make me too poor to be your sugar daddy." I crumple up the paper and chuck it into the bin in the corner of the room.

"Mari, not being rude or anything but this is very serious." Adrien sighs.

"Not being rude or anything but I'm recovering from a serious head trauma. We can retaliate next week babe."

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"Alya!" I smile as the brunette makes her way into the stale room. We embrace and I feel incredibly happy to see my best friend again.

"Howdy Mare-bear! You doing okay now girl?" We break from the hug and she takes a seat in Adrien's chair before he left to get lunch.

"Yeah I feel surprisingly good for getting shot, it only really hurts in my head. And even then it's not a lot!"

"Score!" Alya cheers and we both laugh.

"Hey wanna know something cool?" I lean in close to her face and whisper.

"Like a secret? Definitely!" She partly whispers back, an excited grin on her face.

"I'm, " I begin slowly and Alya's visually getting more curios and hyped. "Going to war!"

"Yay! Wait-what did you say?"

"I'm going to war, all thanks to that absolute mouldy cabbage Lila." At the mention of Lila, Alya scoffs and rolls her eyes.

"Ugh, doesn't she know that her petty squabbles aren't worth wasting lives and resources on? She's not exactly WW3 material." Ally scowls and I nod (ow), crossing my arms.

"I know right! Now is hardly the time for war as well. What with climate change and pollution and all that." After my comment, we both sigh and go quiet for a little bit.

"So... What are you gonna do?"

Good point from Alya, what am I gonna do? Build some trenches? Get a cavalry?

"Do you reckon I could pull a Ceaser? Not as in stab me, bro. But build a wall around Lila's forces?" I start stroking my chin in thought and at my plan, Alya begins to do the same.

"I mean it sounds like a good plan. She's not leading a country or anything so all her soldiers are probably at a camp somewhere, waiting. How are you gonna build a wall though?"

Hmmm.

"Well we could build it pretty wide around the camp, so they don't know it's there, right, and then set fire to any food sources they got in there."

"That's a bit mean innit? We need to convince the readers we're good people." Alya breaks the fourth wall and to be fair, it's a very valid point.

"You're right babes. How about we just negotiate for now? Wait until she does something terrible to make sure none of the readers sympathizes with her?"

Alya nods and we high five, before moving on to discuss something rather pressing.

"Alya why do you have a bird?" Alya looks a bit confused then recognition flashes across her face and we both look at the bird on her head.

"Who you calling bird, bitch. I have a name!" The bird huff's and rolls it's beady bird eyes.

"It can TALK?!" Alya doesn't seem nearly as surprised as me at the scientific miracle and she instead smiles at me.

"Yeah. Cool right? I met him outside in the corridor. He's a pretty swell guy for a bird, we've really connected." Alya is ridiculously casual for someone who recently befriended a talking bird so I can only assume he is indeed a swell guy.

"Oh well, it's nice to meet you Mr...?"

"My names Borb. Borb Birb. Some, however, call me Alex, maybe even Bing Bong. I go by many names." The bird- Mr Birb, speaks very fancy for a bird which raises a lot of questions. Do birds even have a high society?

"Nice to meet you! I'm Marinette." Just a normal girl with a normal life.

"And I'm Alya!" Alya smiles and we all laugh, surprisingly enough even Borb.

"Is anyone else coming to visit? Nino? Chloe? Tikki or Plagg? OH SHIT! Do they even know I got shot?!" I say once we finish laughing, the sudden realization of my uncle and aunt in Paris hurting my head.

"Oh yeah, they're coming to see you after I leave I think. They wanted me to tell you actually." Alya says causally! Casually! I'm seeing Tikki and Plagg for the first time since coming to China. Hold up.

Why didn't they come to my coronation?

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So corona exists, you guys doing ok? Thanks a lot for reading! I hope you enjoyed.

Also, I don't wanna get political on a fanfic but BLACK LIVES MATTER

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