Hyungwon went back to the cemetery. He didn't really know why he felt he had to go, but he wanted to get out of the house for a walk and he'd just ended up there somehow. Hyungwon passed the gates, less hesitant than last time. He decided to stop by Jooheon's brothers' graves and maybe clean them up a bit, but Hyungwon walked around for half an hour without being able to locate the two headstones. He retraced his steps to the gate and tried to follow the same path Jooheon had taken the other day, but Hyungwon gave up after not being able to find the graves. He'd been wandering around in the cemetery for about an hour, and the longer he stayed, the more unnerved he became.
Hyungwon left the cemetery and went back home, his head starting to hurt a bit.
--
Monday came, and Hyungwon went to school but didn't see Jooheon the whole day. It felt weird to be disappointed. He barely knew Jooheon, certainly not enough to justify missing him. But the sleepover had been fun, Hyungwon had to admit. He couldn't remember ever having one before. Jooheon had been gone in the morning - Hyungwon vaguely recalled him saying something about having to run an errand for his mom - and Hyungwon hadn't heard from him since.
He wondered if Jooheon was avoiding him, if he'd done something wrong.
Maybe his pajamas hadn't been impressive enough.
Or maybe Jooheon hadn't been able to sleep. Hyungwon had taken to sleeping on the couch lately - he just didn't feel comfortable in his own room and he wasn't quite sure why - so Jooheon had offered to take the floor despite Hyungwon's protests. And when Hyungwon had woken up in the morning, his only company had been Mi-Yeon's night light.
Tuesday came, and Hyungwon didn't see Jooheon in the class they had together, but he thought he saw him leaving the building later that day. He tried to catch up with him, but when he got out to the parking lot, Jooheon was gone. Hyungwon wondered if they'd gone back to the restaurant from last time. He didn't know where else they went to hang out; it was his only lead. He debated just going home, but he found that he didn't want to return there just yet. He decided that he'd just walk to the restaurant and see if they were there, and if not, then it was fine, he could grab something to eat anyway.
He got to the restaurant and scanned over the customers, but he didn't see Jooheon or any of the others. Still, he couldn't clearly see every table from where he was standing, so he went over to the hostess' counter.
"Hi there, table for one?" she asked. It was the same girl as last time.
Hyungwon didn't even bother to cover his face; if she was staring, he just did his best to ignore it. "I'm not looking for a table," he said, still peering across the room. "I just wanted to know if you saw a few guys my age come in?"
"Sorry, we have a lot of customers, can you be more specific?"
"The same people I was sitting with last time," Hyungwon said, but he already sort of knew that they weren't there. Just a feeling.
The hostess frowned. "Last time?"
"I was here a few days ago," Hyungwon said, realizing that maybe she'd forgotten him. Of course she had; she probably saw a hundred people a day. "Sorry, you probably don't remember me, I-"
"No, I remember you," she said before pointing to the table they'd sat at. "You were over there, right? Thursday- no, it was Friday, wasn't it?"
Hyungwon felt a small surge of hope. "That's right. So have you seen any of the people I was sitting with come in today?"
She tilted her head slightly, eyebrows creasing upward toward the middle. "I remember you, but I don't remember there being anyone else." She tapped at the plastic menu in front of her, her polished nail carving out an even beat as she recalled what she knew, which didn't seem to be much.
"No, I was at a table with four other guys," Hyungwon said.
"Sorry," she said after a moment, her frown skewing to one side as her finger stilled, the staccato rhythm of nail against plastic falling away abruptly. "I must have mistaken you for someone else. But you're welcome to look around if you'd like and see if they're here."
"No, that's okay," Hyungwon said with a sigh. He could tell they weren't here, and he was feeling very tired all of a sudden. He started walking back home when he got a call just outside the cemetery. Normally, he'd ignore his phone, leave it off even, but he'd been feeling sort of jittery lately. Maybe it was a side effect of social interaction. "Hi," Hyungwon said immediately, and then he almost slapped himself for not checking Caller ID first. But the voice on the other end was exactly the one he'd been wanting to hear.
"Hey," Jooheon said with a small laugh. It soothed something in Hyungwon, made him less anxious, and he found himself wandering back into the cemetery with the phone pressed against his ear. "I haven't seen you in school the past two days, just wanted to see if everything was okay."
Hyungwon frowned. "I was at school, and I didn't see you." Hyungwon paused to consider the fact that maybe he'd dreamt it, that maybe he'd slept through the day, but that wouldn't explain how he'd gone to the restaurant and was here now.
Jooheon just laughed. "Maybe we're both blind. Well, I'm glad you're doing all right at least. Are you going to be at club on Thursday?"
Hyungwon took a second to respond because he had stopped in front of Minjae and Minjun's graves, and they were right where he'd thought they were. He must have missed them the other day. Maybe he was going blind. "Maybe," Hyungwon said as he knelt down and brushed a few leaves off the headstones. Then he pulled back because he felt like maybe it wasn't his place to do so, that maybe he wasn't allowed to visit them because he wasn't their family and he'd never known them. But he could sort of picture them. He'd conjured up an imagine in his mind of two identical boys, their eyes a little mischievous and their hair sticking out in all directions.
"Well, I hope you come," Jooheon said, and Hyungwon started walking back to the gates.
Hyungwon startled himself with his following answer. "I hope so too."
--
Hyungwon still wasn't quite sure what to make of their odd group. He didn't feel comfortable with them yet, but it wasn't as bad as before.
"Okay okay, I have another one," Kihyun said, holding a hand up to draw everyone's attention. He'd barely finished laughing from his last joke, and the slight shaking of his shoulders gave away how hard he was trying to compose himself. "What do you get when you're in a car crash and both your legs are shattered?"
"What?" a few of them asked. Hyungwon stayed silent.
"A wheelchair," Kihyun said and immediately began laughing so hard that he fell out of his seat. Minhyuk rolled his eyes and Hoseok smiled nervously, looking between Kihyun and Hyungwon as though trying to send him an apology with his eyes.
But Hyungwon didn't really mind. It was weird being around other people, but it wasn't horrible.
After Kihyun got back on his seat, he and Minhyuk broke into a squabble about something – it sounded like Minhyuk thought Kihyun owed him money, but Kihyun claimed that Minhyuk owed him money.
"You're an idiot," Minhyuk said, rolling his eyes at Kihyun as he crossed his arms over his chest. "I don't even know why I bother listening to you."
"Yeah, well, more people died in my accident than yours so my opinion is more valid than yours." Kihyun looked around the room. "Well, guys? Am I right or am I right?"
"I don't necessarily think it works that way," Hyunwoo said carefully, and Kihyun just stuck his tongue out at him.
"Does too, they're called suffering points and I have more of them than Minhyuk so I automatically win every argument."
"That's A, completely stupid and irrational and B, not even remotely fair," Minhyuk pointed out as though anyone was bothering to adjudicate their conversation.
"If you want me to pretend to care about your opinions, then you need to suffer more. That's my final offer."
The two continued fighting, and Hyungwon just watched, not feeling comfortable enough to get involved. It was odd; what they were saying was objectively offensive, but it didn't feel that way. Maybe because they all had some sort of claim to loss and pain.
Except Changkyun, with his fender bender. He looked extremely uncomfortable, but he was doing his best to focus on something he was drawing rather than weighing in on their argument.
Jooheon was sitting behind the drum set as usual, and Hyungwon went over by him. He leaned against the piano and listened as Jooheon tapped out a soft rhythm on the hi hat.
"Well?" Jooheon asked. "Now that you've gotten to know them a little bit, what do you think about joining the club?"
Hyungwon shifted his weight, unintentionally striking a few of the keys, and he stood up straight to take his weight off the piano. "I-" Hyungwon paused to sneeze once, then twice more in quick succession. "Sorry," he said as he squeezed his eyes shut, trying to force himself to avoid a fourth sneeze. He wasn't allergic to anything; he usually only had seasonal allergies or reactions triggered by dust. Sure enough, he opened his eyes to see a thin layer of dust on the piano – minus the spot he'd been leaning against – and on the drum set as well.
"It's fine," Jooheon said with a laugh. "What do you think about joining, though?"
Hyungwon shrugged and, to avoid giving a definitive answer, said he needed to leave for therapy.
--updated 06/07/20 (mm/dd/yy)--
also, i've decided by popular opinion to start uploading weekly on tuesdays! if the chapters are short, i may do a few at a time. as always, thanks everyone for reading!
Bạn đang đọc truyện trên: Truyen247.Pro