~  Monday, April 5, 1813  ~

I woke to the grumbling of my bunkmates as the early risers left their beds and trundled to the privy under the fog of sleep. For me, it was the most excited I'd been since taking up the post of cadet, although Collette appeared to share equally in my enthusiasm.

"Yer gonna make a fine nurse, Rose," she said as she ran a bristle brush across her teeth. "Ye have a patient temperament, which ye will need with these whiny men."

"It's not the men I'm worried about. It's the matron. She will not go easy on me, I am sure of that."

She didn't even try to argue because she knew it was true, and we hurried to grab a plate of breakfast before our shift started. After the matron sent each nurse loose on their assigned patients, she took me aside, filling my head with more information than any one person could possibly hold. I felt certain she intended to break my will, but she knew nothing of the will of an orphan, and I remained alert throughout the rapid training.

I managed to perform my duties adequately under the matron's watchful eye. While she insisted on correcting my technique with every new task, by lunch her complaints had turned into thoughtful lessons one might expect from a tutor wishing to see their pupil succeed. I saw this as an opportunity to broach a subject I had been afraid to bring up, which I did as she dismissed her nurses to the mess cabin.

"Matron Orwell, I wondered if you think it appropriate that I share the coin and items of convenience I collected for the injured men in our care. My benefactors were quite generous with their donations."

"What sort of items?" She spoke over her shoulder as we walked an aisle collecting soiled linens.

"Bristle brushes for their teeth, wax and combs for mustaches, parchment and pens, talcum powder."

"The navy supplies most of those items in their kits," she countered.

"Yes, but these items come from royalty, including the Duke of Norfolk and the Earl of Oxford. Many of them are of high quality. I am sure that will please the men."

She turned around and gave me a hard look as she clutched tightly to a laundry crate. Oh, dear. Had I pushed my luck and broached the subject too soon? "You are courtesan to the Duke of Norfolk?"

"Yes. He has been a friend of the family for many years. Before me, he was a patron of my tutor, Clementine Price."

A strange look took over her features, and I prepared for the verbal attack. Would she hold me responsible for the duke's refusal to carry on his royal lineage? She would not be the first to make the accusation.

"I need to stop listening to Marjorie. She told me you were tutored by Odette Ziani. And I will not mince words when it comes to that snake. Mistress Ziani has absolutely no moral compass."

Ah, so Colonel Smith's wife was fueling Matron Orwell's hatred for me. I didn't dare ask what brought the matron to that brutal conclusion about Odette Ziani, despite her assessment being somewhat accurate. "Mistress Ziani did tutor a young courtesan. Her name is Harriett Middlestone. There is no love lost between Harriett and myself, to be frank."

My confession provoked a smile that the matron made no effort to suppress. "Your ability to read people has not been lost on me, Mistress Hayes. Now, you best be off before your lunchtime is over. And you may bring the items. Just be sure there is enough for every man."

With a tentative but hopeful bond forming between the matron and myself, I managed the rest of my shift with vigor. I passed the items to the nurses to share with their patients, and by evening, there was a smile on nearly every man's face. As I climbed into my bunk for a much-needed rest, I allowed those smiles to lull me to sleep. Although it was the image of the mystery man on the deck of the Pelican that I finally dozed off to.

~  Tuesday, April 6, 1813  ~

The following day progressed much like the one before, only this one came with a fresh wave of rumors about my sick lover aboard the Pelican, and how I had betrayed the pirate who I left sitting in the brig. I had built a thick skin against gossip, but each time Captain Thompson was mentioned, I felt a painful tug in my chest.

The matron did not keep me under her thumb this time. In fact, she appeared somewhat distracted and excused herself from the infirmary shortly after lunch, leaving Cat in charge. When my shift ended, I had no idea if I had passed her scrutiny and would be allowed to visit Jules on the Pelican. Feeling anxious, I made a detour to visit Captain Boucetta before retiring. He and his crew were playing a game of dice through the bars of their cells. When the captain saw me enter, he left his seat to greet me.

"Ah, Mistress Hayes. How nice to see you."

"Pleasant evening, Duncan. Hello everyone." I smiled at his mates, but only the men responded in kind. Talia pretended she didn't hear me. 

I pulled up a chair and Duncan did the same. His body odor offended, but it was no worse than the men who'd come over from the Pelican. "How have they been treating you?" I asked.

"The food is garbage, but at least they're feeding us."

"And the cots? Have you had adequate sleep?" I glanced at the cots provided the prisoners. All were in disrepair. Likely rejects from the infirmary.

"Better than the floor." He smiled, exposing dingy teeth. Clearly, his hygiene had been neglected since they'd moved him and his mates into the brig. "I would like to know how you have been. There has been gossip about you. Something about a sick lover on the Pelican."

I hid the pain behind a smile. "That is only partly true. He is not my lover but a very dear friend. I became acquainted with his family some months back after they lost their mother to smallpox. I suppose I filled a void." To my ears, the explanation sounded insincere. I had not merely been filling a void... Had I?

"It is lucky that you found him then, eh? Has his condition improved?"

"I don't know. He is still aboard the Pelican. I have requested that I be allowed to fetch him, but I am still waiting to hear."

Duncan frowned as he stared at my throat. "Are you not wearing the gift I gave you?"

My hand automatically went to my neck, although I knew I wouldn't find it there. "No. I don't have a chain to hang it from. And we are required to keep our possessions in a locker, for our own safety. A chain could become entangled while we work."

His eyes widened. "But a locker can be tampered with and your possessions stolen. Have you checked that it is still where you put it?" He seemed overly concerned about the security of the pendant, and rightly so. It seemed to hold great value for him. But I also expected a pirate would have learned to be suspicious of thieves. If the rumors about him were true.

Without waiting for my reply, he left his seat and walked over to Talia. "I need your chain. I will replace it. You have my word."

She eyeballed him like she didn't believe him one bit. "Zis belonged to ma mère. Eet is...irreplaceable."

"When we get to London, Rose will give it back. Won't you, Rose?" With arched brows, Duncan stared at me with those dark, persuasive eyes.

"Of course."

If there was one thing I could have done to make the woman hate me more, I believed this was it. Talia glared daggers at me as she removed the chain from her neck and placed it into Duncan's hand. He walked it over and slipped his hand between the bars.

"Wear the pendant under your collar," he said. "They will not know you have it, and you will stay safe."

I could not tell if he was more concerned that I stay safe or if he was referring to the pendant. Just then, Collette entered the brig.

"Ye sure are a hard person to locate, Rose. The matron's back, and she wants to see ye, right away."

While an urgent request by the matron usually struck fear into my heart, this time I had hopes she wished to tell me I had passed her tests. I knew that Midshipman Hornsby's welts had begun to respond to treatment. "Very well."

I bid Duncan and his mates farewell, promising to return soon, and followed Collette away. "Do you know what the matron wants with me?"

"Erm, not exactly." She threw an uncertain glance over her shoulder, and I knew straight away that something was wrong. Perhaps, the matron had left to speak with Colonel Smith and he insisted I stay in the laundry. Maybe it was the colonel's wife who convinced her I wasn't worth the trouble.

I didn't question Collette further. Whether or not she knew why I was being summoned, I would soon find out on my own. When we entered the infirmary, she walked me to the furthest corner where a privacy screen had been set up. She finally met my gaze as I rounded the screen, and what I saw had me faltering in my tracks.

Lying as still as a corpse, Captain Thompson dominated the attention of three attendants, one of whom was a Matron Orwell. The other was a nurse by the name of Pauline, and the third was an officer pouring a bucket of water into the bathing cot where the captain lay. When he left for a refill, Collette nudged me forward, and I caught the eye of the matron.

"Ah, Mistress Hayes. Come, take over for Paulene. Her shift is through."

Paulene stood from her seat and handed me a wet towel. "We need to bring his fever down. Just keep dowsing his body with sea water." Her gloomy tone had my insides turning to ice, but I maintained my wits as I assumed her position across from the matron.

As I dipped the towel into the bath water, I realized Jules had been stripped down to nothing. This did not surprise me, but I felt Matron Orwell's eyes on me as I squeezed the cool water over Jules's chest. How had they convinced him to board the Surety? Or, rather, who had convinced him? Was it his poor condition that had finally done it? Perhaps, he had deteriorated so far that he was unaware what was being done to him.

I lifted my gaze to the matron, speaking no words, but thinking them quite loudly in my head. Her keen perception did not fail her.

"I enquired about the captain's condition and learned that he had been refusing treatment – leaving his sickbed and wandering the ship. I asked that they keep me informed, and when they told me his fever had spiked and he had gone into a delirious state, Lieutenant Davis and I brought him here without argument. You have chosen a stubborn man to lose your senses over. Stubborn and reckless."

I did not know what to say. Her selfless compassion had struck me dumb. Of course, I had to say something. "Your dedication to your profession and to these brave men probably saved his life."

She glanced down at the captain's sedate form. "Let us not get ahead of ourselves. He is not out of the woods yet."

She resumed her quiet tending of the captain, leaving me to battle the same awful pain I felt the day his ship left London, and I did not budge from his side until I was sure he would not expire. While the matron vanished to attend other patients, she always returned. I knew she was working through her rest period. I saw the signs of fatigue. And her desire to oversee the captain's care had me feeling a closeness to her that I never would have predicted. I supposed I had found her soft spot.