Beau stared up at the ceiling in disbelief. Last night was all a blur... It all felt so unreal that Beau was almost certain it was a dream. He had kissed Lukas. And Lukas had kissed him back. It had been one of the best moments of Beau's life... All of the doubt and frustrations he had been holding for so long had melted away for a few short moments...

Sadly, their time together had been cut short by Lukas's father. He hadn't seen anything, but the moment Lukas heard his truck pull up he had pulled away and quickly rushed to finish his chores. Beau decided it would be best to leave and only exchanged a quick and lighthearted conversation with Mr. Edwards.

Mr. Edwards had always liked Beau. He had thought he was a good example and someone that would keep Lukas out of trouble. He was glad that his son had found what he believed to be a straight, white, Christian boy to be around. Beau had found Mr. Edwards to be a very determined and faithful man. And that was where the compliments ended.

Mr. Edwards was strict and cruel. He liked things a very specific way and had always been very cold toward Lukas. Beau knew that Lukas hated talking about his dad, so he wasn't exactly sure what had been the turning point in their relationship. Beau never hated anyone... But if he did, it would be Mr. Edwards. He was against everything Beau believed in and that made conversations with him difficult.

Beau sighed and sat up from his bed. He wanted to see Lukas again, but he was terrified too. What if Lukas had only kissed him out of pity or to shut him up? What if Beau was just going crazy and it wasn't real? What if Lukas regretted it and wanted nothing to do with him anymore?

Beau hesitantly climbed out of bed and changed out of his pajamas and into simple jeans and a t-shirt. He wanted something more... He didn't know what he wanted to dress like, but he knew that his current clothes were uncomfortable. They didn't look right on his skin... They didn't look like Beau.

Beau sighed and rushed to his bathroom to finish getting ready. He headed downstairs afterward to find an array of muffins strategically placed onto a plate. Without much thought, Beau grabbed one and took a huge bite as he headed out to the barn to get started on his chores.

Beau wrinkled his nose slightly in distaste as the smell of manure lingered out from the barn. He groaned and shoved the rest of the muffin into his mouth before heading into the barn. First, he let the horses into the pasture before grabbing the necessary tools to clean the stalls.

After what felt like hours, all of the feces had been removed and Beau was already feeling exhausted. He hadn't exactly slept right last night... His mind was too busy buzzing with ideas and possibilities. But more importantly, it wouldn't stop reminding him of his insecurities.

"Hey, Sunshine" Lukas chuckled as he headed into the barn. Beau's stomach erupted in butterflies and he tried his best to swallow the lump in his throat. Lukas didn't exactly look angry. And he was here, so that was something. But Beau couldn't help being even a little upset.

There was nothing off about Lukas. He wasn't hesitant and didn't show any of the fear that Beau felt. Maybe the kiss meant nothing to him. Maybe he was just trying to forget it ever happened. Or maybe it never did happen. Maybe it had all been an all too vivid dream.

"Hey, Lukas" Beau forced a casual smile. His heart was slamming in his chest as the two boys stared at one another, completely lost for words. Beau eventually couldn't take the silence and spoke up. "Look, about yesterday... We can pretend it never happened if you want-" Beau began.

"Is that what you want?" Lukas asked. Finally, his relaxed imagine began to fall revealing a boy who was just as afraid as Beau... Maybe even a little more.

"Of course not" Beau breathed. He lowered his gaze down to the messy, hay covered floors of the barn. "But if you did... I'd get it" Lukas quickly glanced around to make sure nobody was looking. Not trusting himself, he grabbed onto Beau's hand and pulled him toward the hay room. A room with stacks of hay that were just shy of the ceiling.

Beau had always been fond of the smell. He had often spent his nights reading in here to get some peace and quiet. He liked how enclosed and secure it was... If only he knew what kind of memories it would hold.

Lukas placed another slow kiss on Beau's lips. For a moment, Beau swore his heart stopped. He had been too surprised to notice last night, but Lukas was a good kisser. He was gentle and took things slow. His lips were soft like feathers and his hands lingered at Beau's waist. His fingers ran in reassuring circles and just their touch alone drove Beau mad.

Beau kissed him back without any hesitation. His hands ran up Lukas's chest and up into his hair. That was where the two were different. Lukas was a chaste kisser. He liked things simple, warm, and loving. And as much as Beau enjoyed that, he had always craved something a bit more exciting. But he wasn't going to ask that of Lukas... He wasn't ready.

Lukas and Beau would occasionally break away to catch their breath, before pressing another kiss on the other's lips. After seventeen years of knowing one another, and only God knew how many years of wanting one another, they finally had each other. And neither of them wanted to ruin it... It was all just a dream come true.

Lukas pressed one last peck to Beau's lips before resting his forehead against his with a wide smile. Beau felt lightheaded and fuzzy. He never wanted to pull away. He never wanted to let go... He didn't want to spend a single day pretending anymore. And he didn't have to. Because Lukas was his forever.

"You know I've always loved that pretty smile" Lukas mumbled as he ran his thumb across Beau's bottom lip. Beau closed his eyes for a moment to savor this feeling. He wanted to remember this moment... He wanted to remember what Lukas's breath felt like against his skin. How electrifying his touch was and how natural he felt in his arms.

"I've waited forever to do that" Beau admitted as his eyes fluttered open. A pearl-like smile broke onto Lukas's face. He placed one last kiss on Beau's forehead before pulling away.

"Me too..." Lukas chuckled. "Come on, I promised my dad I'd pick up Zip's medication and you're coming with me"

"Why would I do that?" Beau asked. His eyebrows furrowed together as he watched the pretty blonde walk toward the exit of the hay room.

"Because Ronda's started selling dairy-free ice cream and I think you'd like it" Lukas sent him a teasing wink making Beau smile. Beau was lactose intolerant. Usually, if he went to Ronda's with his friends he just got a cupcake, or sometimes Ronda made him homemade popsicles if she had extra time. Not to mention that Beau's mother only used dairy-free products as well.

But Lukas had always felt a bit bad for leaving Beau out. Usually, Beau would find a small pint of lactose-free ice cream waiting in his freezer after those days. It had always given Beau what he believed to be false hope... He couldn't believe he had spent so long thinking that it was impossible for Lukas to feel the same when the signs were so obvious.

"That sounds amazing" Beau gushed as he rushed to follow Lukas to his truck. The familiar old and beat-up pickup truck that Lukas had gotten for his sixteenth birthday was familiar. It was a dark blue and always smelt of stale mint since Lukas always chewed gum when he drove. He claimed it helped him focus.

Beau pulled the passenger door open and quickly climbed into the seat. He adjusted the seatbelt and instantly began going through the old cassettes Lukas kept. The weight of the truck shifted as Lukas climbed into the driver seat and extended a pack of mint gum to Beau.

"Want some?" Beau mumbled a quick 'no thanks' as he flipped through the cassettes. He finally found one with a single word written on top in sharpie: Journey. He quickly popped it in and adjusted the volume while Lukas silently judged him.

"Again?" Lukas chuckled as Beau put them away. "You play that every time"

"So? They're a good band" Beau protested. Lukas only smiled and intertwined their fingers, bringing Beau's hand to his lips and pressing a sweet kiss to it.

"Okay" Lukas reluctantly agreed and pulled out of the long driveway. Beau rested his head against the truck window, closing his eyes and letting Steve Augeri's voice wash over him. The light vibrations and hum of the truck were all too familiar and the smell of mint gum began filling the air.

Beau had so many questions. He wanted to ask Lukas a million things... Only a day ago he believed that he knew everything there was to know about Lukas... And then they kissed. There was an entire side of him that Beau never knew existed and he wanted to know every piece of it. But he didn't want to ask now. He didn't want to interrupt how perfect this moment was. It almost didn't feel real.

"Wait here" Lukas announced as he pulled into the vet's parking lot. He climbed out of the truck and headed into the small, ancient building.

Their town had been here for ages... It was small enough for everyone to know everyone and hadn't changed much over the years. People all wore the same basic clothing, scowled at the same teen magazines, and worked the same few jobs. Being different was rare... Almost unheard of.

Beau could recall one openly gay kid at his school. His name was Kyle Longheart. He was tall, lanky, and awkward. Of course, Beau knew him and his family since they went to the same church and school but Beau had never exchanged more than a few words with him. When he did come out it had been an outrage... Which was only more encouragement for Beau to leave.

Then, of course, there was Ms. Paula. She was an older woman who had gotten a divorce decades ago after her husband discovered her with a woman. Despite all of the hate and disgusted looks she was given, the stubborn old woman had fought for her place in the town and hadn't left. Beau even recalled hed putting Mr. Edwards in his place once or twice.

"Martha's inside" Lukas groaned as he swung the door shut. Beau bit back a laugh as he thought back to Lukas's groupie. She was fifteen or sixteen and had had the biggest crush on Lukas ever since he had stood up to a few bullies for her and invited her to sit with them at lunch. At first, Beau had been a tad bit jealous... But after realizing Lukas's lack of interest, he just enjoyed teasing Lukas about it.

"Did you tell the new Mrs. Edwards I said hello?" Beau teased with a wide smirk. Lukas turned to give Beau an annoyed glare. Lukas was a big guy, so many people found his glares intimidating. But Beau had quickly caught on to the fact that Lukas was a big softie despite his tough exterior and enjoyed getting on his nerves.

"That ain't funny" Lukas huffed. "And I thought you'd be done with that after..." He paused and the truck quickly fell into silence. Beau bit down on his lip slightly, neither of the boys wanting to make eye contact with one another.

"After what, Lukas?" Beau deadpanned. "After you kissed me?" He sent Lukas an almost accusing glare. Beau always tried to stay light and positive... He really did. But it was no secret to Lukas and his family that those moods were incredibly unstable. They always had been... Beau could go through school and not once falter. He could brighten everyone's day with a smile and a laugh. But the moment he was with family (and Lukas) he tended to disassociate at times. He'd fall into emptiness and go quiet one moment, be short-tempered and self-conscious next, and then smile like nothing had happened.

This was one of those moments. Where his insecurities got the best of him... When he'd snap at someone over a harmless comment. He hated it and the moment the words left his mouth he always felt guilty. And now he was catching an attitude with the love of his life simply over the fear that Lukas regretted it.

"Beau... I didn't mean it like that. You know that" Lukas sighed. "You know I care a lot about you... This is all just new. I'm not sure what to say"

"I'm sorry" Beau groaned as he ran his fingers through his hair. Lukas only sighed and pulled out of the driveway. Beau was slightly relieved he didn't push the matter any further. Beau always needed a moment to recollect himself after those. To suppress his fears and anxiety and to become the Beau everyone knew and loved.

The drive to Ronda's was silent. Lukas knew Beau needed a moment and Beau was too afraid to speak out of fear of losing himself again. Beau couldn't help feeling slightly relieved when Lukas spoke up.

"Are you good?" He asked. Hesitance laced his voice and Beau felt a pang of guilt in his stomach. He gave Lukas a reassuring smile and began to unbuckle his seatbelt.

"Yeah" Beau promised. He wouldn't falter again... He wouldn't snap and he wouldn't upset Lukas. That was all he had to do, so why was it so hard? He hopped out of his car and walked around to meet Lukas in front.

"I worry about you sometimes" Lukas mumbled as they headed inside.

"Don't... I'm alright, I promise" Beau grinned. He didn't bother keeping their voices down. They were the only ones in the small bakery and Ronda was partially deaf so the loud mixers in the back likely drowned out his voice. "Why wouldn't I be? My family is great, I have a supportive mother, good friends, I have you... I'm happy" And that wasn't even a lie.

"I know that... But you'd tell me if something was wrong. Right?" Lukas sighed. Beau just nodded before heading over to look over all of the new ice cream options. A wide smile broke onto his face as he spotted three dairy-free options.

He wasn't as brave as other lactose-intolerant people. He used to be and would gladly accept the consequences for eating dairy, but now not only did it give him stomach issues but it had made him throw up on numerous occasions. Luckily, dairy-free ice cream wasn't half bad.

"Hola, Lindo" Ronda grinned as she came up to the counter. She was a tall and lean Hispanic woman with pretty dark eyes and long, thick dark hair. She had heard other people refer to Beau as "pretty boy" in a teasing manner but she had given Beau the nickname "Lindo" which basically meant the same thing. Only she said it endearingly. "I got a few new flavors if you're interested" She announced with a wink.

"Thank you, Ronda" Beau licked his bottom lip as he read over the three flavors. It didn't seem like much, but it was hard to find dairy-free ice cream in convenience stores, much less in shops. The only place that he could guarantee sold it was almost an hour away. "Can I please get a scoop of lemongrass?"

"Of course, and you Lukas?" Ronda asked as she glanced up at the handsome blonde boy.

"Just chocolate will do" Lukas shrugged. "And do you have any of those maple donuts? My dad has been in a mood and I was hoping to cheer him up a bit"

"Anything for you, darling" Ronda chuckled as she began to prepare their order.

After getting everything they needed, the two boys had gotten into the car and drove down to the old woods behind Lukas's house. There they could eat their ice cream in peace, enjoy one another's company, and explore the trails they had already memorized.

"Is your dad alright?" Beau asked as he turned his attention away from his ice cream and to Lukas. Lukas only shrugged and awkwardly brought his gaze to the floor.

"It's August eighteenth in a few days... You know how he gets" Lukas sighed. Beau's heart dropped at that. He couldn't believe he had forgotten... August eighteenth was the day Mr. Edwards had found his wife laying on the bathroom floor with an empty bottle of sleeping pills sitting on the bathroom counter.

"Lukas, I'm so sorry" Beau sighed as he rested his hand on top of his. He knew he couldn't make Lukas feel better... He couldn't take away his pain or sense of loss, but he could do his best to be there.

"It's fine, really" Lukas shrugged. "She went away peacefully... No pain, no suffering... As sad as it is, it seems like a nice way to go" Beau stared at him in disbelief. He wasn't sure if he should be worried or not... The only thing keeping him from questioning him was the fact that Lukas was happy. Lukas had always been content with his life and had good things going for him.

"If you ever want to talk..."

"I know" Lukas gave Beau a small smile. "I always got you, Beau. I know. You remind me every year" He chuckled.

"Well, maybe I worry about you too" Beau chuckled. Lukas let out a light nose laugh before the two fell into a long and comfortable silence. Beau was about halfway done with his ice cream when he decided he couldn't take not knowing anymore. "How long have you liked me... Like more than friends?" Beau asked hesitantly.

"Well... That's a difficult question" Lukas sighed. "I figured you were gay around seventh or eighth grade-"

"How?" Beau demanded, earning a laugh from Lukas.

"Do you remember how I convinced you to join football with me? It was Eric Decker... You weren't even interested in the game until I showed you an interview with him" Lukas chuckled. Beau felt his cheeks heat up and he quickly brought his gaze down to his ice cream.

"That man is beautiful and you know it" Beau grumbled.

"Anyways, I thought that was a bit odd. Then we joined the team and you discovered that we had to change around other guys... At first, I thought you were just shy, but then you went through that phase... You were so sad and confused... I hated not being able to help you... But you got better and I eventually put two and two together" Lukas shrugged.

Beau remembered that phase. When he had realized that he was gay and suddenly couldn't handle himself. He hated who he was for a while and had felt so alone... Eventually, he had come out to his mom and things got better since he had someone to talk to.

"I didn't say anything... I didn't want to make you uncomfortable and frankly, I didn't want to talk about it either... Especially with my dad being who he is" Lukas sighed. "Then I went to camp this Summer... Johnny got himself a girl and wouldn't stop rambling on about how much he loved her... All of the guys seemed to have a story of a crush or a girlfriend that they cared a lot about and I just couldn't imagine feeling that way about anyone"

"Well... Anyone except you... At first, I thought it was a brotherly or best friend type of feeling. But then I thought about all of my other close friends and they just didn't compare..." Lukas bit down on his bottom lip. "It was... Terrifying at first... But I eventually realized that it had always been you, Beau"