My parents were worried.

When I came back home from college after 'becoming friends' with Bull, I talked about only one thing: Bull.

'Daddy you know he helped this girl today. It was so sweet! I am not supposed to tell you what he helped her with cause it's her personal life matter...But like...she was kinda maybe....like probably expecting or something and he went all Mother Teresa with her!'

'And daddy, he has such smooth and deep voice. He was being rude at first but when I told him about being your daughter, he was so sweet. He gave me a tour of the college and was telling me some rules. I didn't pay attention to those, though. He was so respectful of you! I loved that!'

'Daddy, we became friends. I know my days won't be boring now.'

Daddy, Bull this.

Daddy, Bull that.

Daddy, Bull.

Bull.

Bull.

Mom and daddy sighed heavily. Their fear? If I was having a 'daddy-inspired crush' on Bull. Let me elaborate.

I had done this with many boys when I was little. It started when one day in a family get together, we kids were playing in the backyard while the adults were sitting nearby in the chairs, enjoying their tea. We were pretending to be astronauts on another planet. This kid named Jonathan shouted when he sensed that our imaginary rocket would crash into daddy's chest. He ran to daddy and tugged at his pant. "Mister Hill, there is a rocket heading your way. Do you want me to protect you?"

Daddy was, of course, baffled. "Ahh...OK?" He said.

Jonathan then did his ninja moves and pretended to destroy the rocket. I was so moved by his care for daddy that I started crying. I would have praised his bravery alone but his bravery for daddy was more important. So I ran to daddy and hugged him.

"Daddy, thank god you are alright!" I said while crying. Daddy was embarrassed in front of everyone.

I turned Jonathan around and kissed him on the lips. We were just five year old.

Jonathan's mom joked that day that the easiest way to Sadie's heart was through her father's. And she couldn't be more right.

From that day on wards, I was attracted to boys who held daddy in high rewards. But of course, I ended up breaking their hearts eventually. Because whenever I looked at them, I didn't see their faces. I saw my father's face instead. This rendered me incapable of truly appreciating their love for me, if there was any. Therefore, my parents were worried that I would end up doing the same to Bull.

Since I was oblivious to this habit of mine, I wasn't sure why they were being so anxious when I kept talking about Bull.

The next day I was again set out to pursue him.

*

Bull was surprised to see me when I arrived by his locker. He did manage to give me a smile but the poor guy seemed to search for a way out. However, he was not ready to ditch his formalities.

"Sadie...ah...um...how can I help you?" He was trying his best to decipher the reason behind my visit.

Today he smelled like clean cotton, baby powder and a hint of manly body spray. His growing stubble told that he wasn't very enthusiastic about his facial hair. I could see an ingrown hair above his right jaw.

"Why all the formalities, Bull?" I bumped his shoulder with my fist. Bull's expression turned bewildered. He looked confused and shocked beyond measure. I couldn't tell if it said 'Did you just bump my shoulder?' or 'How dare you touch my shoulder?'.

"Um...what do you mean?" He asked, trying to stop his hand from moving to the shoulder I just touched. It seemed as if he wanted to get rid of the feeling of my touch from his shoulder.

"Bull, friends can be themselves with each other, can't they? You can talk normally with me. You don't have to be self-conscious or anything." I casually said.

"Friends?" He said.

"Yes, didn't we become friends yesterday?" I said. I couldn't believe he had forgotten so soon. "We shook hands and..." I was trying to make him remember.

"Ah...yes...we did." It didn't seem like he had forgotten. Instead it seemed he didn't want to give it the meaning I was giving it.

My mind kept telling me he was 'putting up with me'. But I was determined to let the negativity pass.

And then I proceeded to turn Bull's day into hell.

I made him walk me to class.

I hunt him down when he tried to hide.

I forced him to sit and eat lunch together. (He brought his lunch from home, can you believe it? Only fruits cut into cute shapes.)

While he ate, I kept looking at him and his white teeth. I could feel the annoyance radiating from him but I didn't care. He was doing a good job at pleasing me because I was.... Dr Hill's daughter! You get it!

If he was in the library, I was there too. I asked him about his majors, although I understood nothing.

I had planned to make him walk me to my house but he vanished around that time.

*

The next day, I repeated the torture. I dragged him with me all along. His usual formal smile was decreasing in size and his acting skills were becoming obvious. Before lunch, we were in the library. Everything I was babbling about, he only replied with an annoyed 'hmm'. That's when my resolve snapped.

"Are you acting?" I asked.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean, from the day we met, I have been continuously feeling like all your formalities with me are fake and that you are so annoyed with me that you would rather have me grabbed by the neck and shoved out the window."

Bull sighed, releasing all his anger and annoyance from the nostrils. He shook his head.

"No, there is nothing like that." He wasn't ready to spill it.

"No, come on! Tell me the truth." I was ready. "Imagine that I am not Dr Hill's daughter. And I am just a normal girl taking away all the peace from your life. What would you have done to me?"

"Sadie, you have got it wrong. I really respect your fath-" There was no sincerity in his tone. He was saying what he was 'supposed' to say.

"Come on, Bull. I have seen other faces of yours too. I know you are not always so chivalrous." I think I snapped the string of tolerance in his mind.

"What do you mean?" Oh, yes, there was that dangerous tone poking its head out.

I thought before saying. "I know you beat up people here. In fact, that was the first thing I saw you do in this college."

"You saw that?" He asked a little surprised.

"With my very two eyes."

Bull inhaled for the longest time and then gave me a dangerous look. It seemed like he was ready too.

"Well, yes, Dr Hill's daughter. That's really what I do here. And if you keep 'taking the peace away from my life' I shall too beat you to a pulp."

I was taken aback.

Yes, I did know he was not going to be nice anymore but I didn't know he was going to be this bad. So is this his real face? Should I be satisfied now? Have I deciphered this man before me? So his ultimate identity is that of a 'bad boy'?

I inhaled and glared at him.

"So you really were acting. And this is your real face?" I asked. I refused to show him my fear. (Although, it was writ large on my face)

"Yes." He replied through his creepy smile. "Are you happy now Miss Judge?"

No doubt, Bull had given me a very accurate title that day. I still laugh about it today.

"I'll tell daddy!" I stupidly said.

"That's all I expect from you, you mummy-daddy girl!"

That too was an accurate title.

"Aaaaaah! How dare you?" In a moment of anger I actually slapped his shoulder. He looked at his shoulder and then at me.

"Get lost!" He roared.

*

When I returned home, mom was gone to buy grocery and I made daddy go for a walk. I would have immediately told him about Bull's rude behavior towards me but only his 'mummy-daddy' title was preventing me.

I am not a 'mummy-daddy' girl! Complaining about everyone to your parents isn't called mummy-daddy! It's called 'sharing everything with your parents'. At least I did a great job of convincing myself of this.

By the time daddy and I returned, mom was seated on the sofa totally exhausted. And someone else was setting the grocery bags in the kitchen.

"You are back, dear." Daddy said.

"Yes," Mom said. "And I am very exhausted."

"Who is in the kitchen?" I asked.

"Oh, It's-" Before mom could finish her sentence, Bull came out of the kitchen, ready to go grab more bags from the car.

"You?" I yelled. Maybe I could never be nice to him.

"Yes. Bull happened to pass by when I was unloading the car." Mom said fondly. "Such a nice boy. He helped me out completely."

"Bull, thank you very much de-"

Ignoring everything mom said and cutting my father's statement, I rudely asked. "What are you doing here?"

"Sadie, what's wrong with you?" Mom said. "That's not how you behave with people."

"Mom, he...." I stopped myself, wanting deeply to tell her what he said to me in college. " He..."

Bull was only smiling formally but, in between, he mouthed 'mummy-daddy' at me. Ugh!

"He what, Sadie?" Daddy asked.

"He said he would beat me to a pulp!" My voice echoed in the house.

"Beat you? Hah, how can I ever do that to my sister?" Bull said sweetly.

WHAT

THE

HELL?

Daddy and mom laughed along with Bull. He even reached and pinched my cheek!

"I could never say that to you, silly."

What is going on? Bull was giving me an evil look and I knew it.

"Don't mind her, Bull." Mom said. "She has always been hard to get along."

"I can tell that, Mrs Hill." He mused.

"And I apologize if my girl has said or done something inappropriate to you in the past days." It was daddy's turn to betray me.

"Whose side are you guys?" I asked, frustrated.

"It's OK, Dr Hill." Bull said. "She is like my little sister after all."

I.Hate.This.Man.

*

After dinner, I went to my room and suckled under the sheets. Daddy came in and asked, "What's wrong, Sadie?"

"Go away. I don't want to talk to you."

"Why not?"

"Because I hate you."

"For what?"

I turned to him. "Because of not asking me what's wrong despite knowing all day that something is wrong with me!"

"I am right now."

"Yea, after you and mom have insulted me before Bull."

"We didn't insult you, dear"

"Yes, you did." I said. "You two refused to listen to me and laughed at me along with him."

"That's because you said such a silly thing!"

"It wasn't silly, daddy!" I said. "Bull did say he would beat me to a pulp! If someone threatens your daughter like that, what do you do? Call it 'silly'?"

"Okay. I allow myself to believe he said that." Daddy said. "But there is no way he would actually do it."

I was about to say more when Daddy spoke again. "And you must have done something to make him say that. Tell me the truth. Have you been messing with him? Or taking too much of his time lately, Sadie?"

"No...." I looked at daddy. "Yes, maybe...but that doesn't mean he-"

"Listen, Sadie, dear." Daddy cherished my cheek. "Bull has other things to take care of. He has to handle his studies because he missed a year of it. Plus, he works too. And there are other things in his life too."

"Other things?" I asked.

"I can't tell you the details because it's his life." Daddy inhaled. "But you know what happens when your life is so messed up and you try to put the pieces together and clean that mess after the storm is over? That's all Bull is going through. So please respect his wishes."

*

The students from college say he is a bully, my parents say he is the nicest boy, my mind says he is ever changing. And if he does have a constant phase then he either isn't showing me or I haven't been able to decide.

When he is his normal self, his voice is smooth, soft and deep. He seems the guy who can't hurt a fly let alone a person. And his face says 'good boy' all over. When he visits my parents, he is formal and chivalrous. Dutiful, respecting, helping and ever-giving. His voice is creamy and deep. When he is angry, his facial expression turns dangerous. His eyes turn dark. His voice is raspy and he roars.

Which one is the real him?

And why am I so curious about him? Oh, yea...because he saved daddy.

"Sadie, stop looking at your breakfast and eat it." Mom said from the stove as she prepared daddy's breakfast.

"Hmm." I said and grabbed the fork. What should I do?

"What are you thinking?" Mom asked.

If I were to ask her directly she would beg me to leave the poor guy alone. So I must beat around the bush.

"Mom." I said.

"Hmm?"

"Um...how do you find out the real face of someone?"

"What does that mean?" She asked like I was crazy.

"I mean...if someone is always pretending and you think they make things up and behave differently with different people. How do you come to know the real them?"

"Well," Mom was thinking hard. "According to my experience, you should check them in their house."

"Check them in their house?" I asked confused.

"Yes, I have often seen people reveal their true personalities within the walls of their houses because that way there is no one to judge them. And you can even see how they treat their family members because that shows how they treat the people who care for them."

At that time, I wasn't convinced by her speech but I decided to give it a try.

I was going to visit Bull's house. Period.