I've been telling myself ever since my lunchtime revelation that the only reason that I haven't actually tried to speak to Ayah yet is because the universe obviously doesn't want us to.

Evidence of my hypothesis: there is no convenient time of the day - for both parties -where an invigorating conversation can take place.

First of all, talking at school is all too confrontational; I want her to settle in - to make a name for herself first without being associated with me. Talking to her in school would basically ruin her chance at a fresh start, so she needs to figure things out by herself. I think I'm happy with a few sneaky sideways glances for now.

Secondly, the van home is no-where near big enough. On the off chance that I embarrass myself, (and let's be honest and say that it's more than likely that this will happen) I don't need the entirety of Bramble Tree to make fun of me for the rest of my days. Secrets are never well kept in the home, and you better believe that the very one you don't want to be let out is the one that everyone is discussing at breakfast the next day.

And finally, when we get back to the home, the first thing she does is dart upstairs to her bedroom, and stay there for the rest of the night. This, unfortunately limits my hours to the forbidden times, stopping me from being able to complete section A of the "go get my life" plan.

And that same cycle continues the next day. Repeat this for a few days and you'll start to believe what I mean when I say that the universe is keeping us apart.

Upon explaining this theory to Mona and the terrible twosome exactly three days after my epiphany, I concluded that going out and grabbing my life was much harder than it sounded, because I still had a crappy job and homework was still the biggest part of my life. Kenny kindly reminded me that the actual experiences may take time to come, because life has a waiting list for these type of things, and Dante told me to, "quit the job and drop out of school because YOLO". Ramona, however, stayed silent for a little while, which was what scared me the most.

The smile that followed was the most terrifying.

"Guess what, Reecey-boy?" She asked, wriggling her eyebrows in anticipation.

"What?" I sighed, already dreading the answer.

"You're about to rebel against the will of the universe."

It took a minute for what she had said to sink in, and while my brain processed the words, it left me to sit solemnly on my chair, stunned into silence while I waited for a response.

"What do you mean?!" I managed to whisper, after Ramona's eyes did that devilish twinkle thing they always do when she has a plan.

Now, I'd like to think that as my friends, they would actually take my words to heart and try their best to support me through all my strife.

However, I was generously reminded by Ramona that real friends encourage and use brute force (if it comes to that) in order to do what's best for their friend.

It sounds more appealing when you're not on the receiving end, I'll remind you.

So here's basically how it all went down:

Ramona stands up with a set determination in her eyes, and before I know it, Dante and Kenny have grabbed both my arms and I'm fighting to wriggle out of their grip. With every struggle their grip becomes tighter, until I'm left to flop lifelessly in their grasp, exasperated and confused.

"What are you doing?" I asked tiredly, hoping that my lack of emotion would deter them for at least a long enough moment to leave me to run.

"What you're too chicken to do." Kenny smiled, and both himself and Dante proceeded in dragging my limp body off my chair and out of the cafeteria (this was mostly Kenny, because the weight of Dante's mobile transportation unit would be likely to crush me).

Looking back as the double doors swung to a close, I couldn't help but notice Ramona stealing the chicken burger from my plate. I noted that my stomach was to be avenged later. One problem at a time.

*
It is interesting how the universe works.

The result of Ramona's plan to encourage me to rebel against the will of the universe, ended in detention.

While good friends are meant to deliver you in your time of need, best friends are allowed to leave you, because rule #4 of the best friend handbook (a sacred document made in year 8 that we follow religiously to this day) was that we were meant to love each other - no matter what.

However, this doesn't allow them to take liberties - i.e leave me to the wrath of Mr Hunter, a teacher who comes #1 on the most hated teacher/teacher that gives the most detentions list. With the amount of detentions he gives, you'd think he works on commission.

As soon as we left the canteen, I was dragged by a chuckling Kenny - led by a mischievous Mona - to the most legendary place in the school.

The first thing you should know is that Riverside Tech isn't known for much, (we're pretty much the most underrated school there is) but there was some big drug bust 2 years ago that gave us a reputation. The neighbouring schools- primarily Rosemary Academy- call us Riverside High, knowing full well that that's not the name of our school and revelling in all their punny glory.

Anyway, the very place that I was taken to was rumoured to be the point where all dodgy transactions in the school took place; at Dodgy Dave's locker.

I was instantly greeted by the man himself, chief businessman who handled dodgy transactions of every kind in the school (his name was actually Jamie, but you'd be surprised what an alliterative nickname does for business - even if it does sound like it comes from Horrid Henry). He smiled a scary smile when he saw Ramona.

"Mona! Reecey- boy! Dante, my man!" He hollered enthusiastically, patting each one of us on the back in turn. Then he stopped and coughed awkwardly. "Kenny."

Kenny was staring at the ground. "Dave."

Dave was victim #2 on the Leona list, and for a while they had this whole feud where they would try to win the maiden's affection - there was even talk of a duel behind the bins outside the canteen. In the end, however, Leona left them both for Tyler Blake and now they can't be around each other so as not to bring up bad memories.

I tell you, Dodgy Dave in love is like something out of a movie. It would have a good title, too.

Before I knew it, Dodgy Dave pulled out a bag of mysterious matter from his locker that made my eyes widen at the damage it would do to my body.

"Dave-". I started.

"Don't worry, Mona told me everything this morning. First timers go free, init?"

I shot Ramona the scariest look I could muster, which she returned with a grimace of embarrassment.

"Uh, Dave, that's not exactly what we're here for." She whispered.

"Ohh, right. Sorry, mixed you up with someone else." Dave said, chuckling a bit as he pocketed the powder. He then produced slightly less intimidating pieces of paper out of an official looking briefcase and put them in my hand before I could look at what they were.

"You want these, right?"

"Yep." Ramona smiled. "Thanks for this, Dave, really."

"Anything for a pretty face." He winked, then walked away, presumably to complete a final dodgy deal before the end of our lunch break.

After sifting through the notes - finding several answers to tests that ominously hadn't been taken yet - I nearly dropped them in surprise. Cheating was a serious offence in our school, which was why I never did it.

I turned to my friends. "Ramona, what is-"

Before I could finish however, she looked over my shoulder and squealed, "Gotta go, remember that this is for your own good!" before herself, Dante and Kenny took off in the direction we came in.

When I felt Mr Hunter's hand on my shoulder (remember that I'm still holding the notes and have basically been caught red-handed) I instantly understood Mona's plan. Of course, I didn't know how it would help me. Underneath all the confusion I was fuming.

He didn't even have to say anything as I accepted the detention slip.

*
3:47pm.

At 3:47pm on Thursday 20th September, I experienced something truly remarkable in not only its own right, but my right too, and the right of everyone else on the planet, because that's how mind-blowingly awesome this moment was.

See I'm a sucker for these kind of things, because I'm obsessed with not only finding meaning in my life, but the brief moments that make me feel like I have meaning, such as when I'm laughing way too hard at something that isn't really that funny, or when I just stop for a moment and realise how much I freaking love the people around me.

This was one of the moments that would surely go in my mental scrapbook, and that I would remember on a random evening when I can't sleep, or when I'm listening to a song I love, and I bet all I'll do is just smile and wait for the next memory to take its toll.

What is this momentous occasion you ask? Well, it of course involves Ayah Abasi - because my life seems to revolve solely around her these days - and incidentally happened in the last place I wanted to be: Detention.

Rewinding to 3:40pm, you'd find me sitting in Mr Hunter's detention with about 7 other kids (I told you he works on commission) and looking out of the window imagining Ramona getting engulfed by a black hole or eaten by a Komodo Dragon. I take pride in my wild imagination.

Then at 3:42, in walked brooding Ayah, who looked around the room for a while trying to decide where to sit. She was wearing her too-big uniform again (duh) but had replaced the designer school bag (probably the only admirable thing about her school outfit) with a bag that I'd seen in the home's donation box. It had a faded picture of the 90's marvel comic superheroes, and a sewn up rip on one of its sides. It made me smile, because I'm the one that had given it up to be donated. Out of the corner of my eye, however, I saw two girls laugh at it - completely unnoticed by Ayah. Once her eyes landed on me I was already staring, but they scanned past me as quickly as they did everybody else. The universe had deliciously distributed everyone evenly around the room, so that anywhere she sat she'd be close to one of us.

I think she deemed me the least disgusting.

"You're late." Me Hunter began. "Detention begins at 3:40 sharp. You will stay for an extra 2 minutes to make up the time."

Yes, Mr Hunter was one of those teachers.

Ayah said nothing, but walked down the isle looking determinedly at her chair 2 rows in front of me, 3 rows behind the kid that always wears a hat.

She sat down with an unsatisfied thump.

I could practically imagine Ramona's victorious smirk in my head. She'd organised my detention specifically after somehow knowing that Ayah had one in the same room. This was her way of rebelling against the universe. This was basically her strange and unique way of setting us up.

Now it was up to me to initiate conversation. But what to say first? I'd already instructed her on the correct location of the girls' bathroom. What  invigorating topic could possibly top that?? I imagined Ramona hitting herself on the head, probably complaining that she had to do everything because no-one else had even half a brain to complete her hare-brained schemes.

I would only thank Ramona if this went right.

I cleared my throat, still trying to think of a topic. I'd decided to think of her only as a potential new friend, and not a girl that I'd had a dream about (also ignoring how much of a creepozoid I sound).

Leaning forward, I whispered, "So, what are you in for?"

Whether or not she got the reference wasn't important.

She stayed unresponsive, so I tried again.

"I kinda understand why you don't want to reply. If you talk in detention, Mr Hunter will do this thing where he makes a big spectacle of putting his pencil down and pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose. Then he sighs, crosses his arms, addresses you by your last name and says 'obviously you want us to spend more quality time together'."

At that exact moment, Mr Hunter made a big spectacle of putting his pencil down and pushing his glasses up his nose. Then he sighed, crossed his arms and said, "Johnson, you obviously want to spend more quality time together."

I beamed in silent triumph when he went back to his work and that was when it happened.

She turned round and smiled at me.

So it was at 3:47 on the same day that the universe granted permission for not  only suitable conversation environment, but suitable smile exchange - except it was two very different things that led us to that point.

And there I was about deny rebellion, when maybe all the universe needed was a little push from Ramona, (and Mr Hunter's commission) for something to happen.