It's been a while i don't know how i could abandon this book seriously though. It's so good
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He trails his hands down my body and up my shirt. I don't understand myself sometimes. I want to be with him but i feel as if he doesn't want to be with me sometimes. When we kiss, when he touches me all that goes away. I've been dreaming of this feeling for awhile. Now that it's reality I can believe i'm kissing the most perfect boy in the world.

It's been a month and a half since he's been staying here. He's decided to finish this semester online with Vylad and Zane. My parents are totally fine with them staying for however long until his parents divorce goes through. I can't complain though.

We make out i push him away. He looks at me and the cycle starts again. My feelings are all over the place and I can't explain why I feel this. I like him so much. Love him almost, but i can't fit my fantasies with reality.

"So what about that date" Garroth says pulling away from me. I sigh softly and pull my shirt back down. This man kisses me as if he isn't a virgin. He could not be one and I honestly wouldn't even know. He kisses me like he's done this before... like i'm not even special.

I get lost in my own thoughts which made me upset and i feel like he could read my face. The only light was my bright glow in the dark stars on my ceiling and the moonlight from my window. I scrunch up my face feeling as if i'm about to cry. The thought of me not being his first, him treating me like he did with someone else, kissing me like he did with someone else. I'm not even special and I haven't he noticed that yet.

A tear escapes from my eye as I get up and Garroth wrapped his arms around me and kisses my temple "Hey what wrong Laurance. I haven't seen you cry. Is it something I said?" Garroth whispered in my ear.  He continued to kiss me with his soft lips. He shirtless body touched my clothed one. All I could think about is him doing this with someone else before he was here with me.

"Am I not your first. The first you've touched like, kisses like this, or be with someone like this" I finally breakout in cry "Do you even want to be with me, are you even a virgin or you just trying to lure me into your trap, huh. Am i not as special as you say I am" I cry into my hands embarrassed of my out burst.

Garroth didn't say anything for awhile. He did get off of me and off the bed. Probably leaving me because of how stupid he thought I was "Yes." He said sitting in front of me kneeling on the floor. He held my tear stained hands and smiled

that smile

"you're the first one I've been with like this. Believe me laurance I know you have seen me with people in the pass but none of them were you. None of them made me as happy as you do. Right now I can see ya getting married and for our honeymoon going to who knows where and doing the unspeakable. You've seen me with females. I've told you I was gay, you're the first man i've been with. But you're the first person i've been with and loved. I love your beautiful teary eyes, your mess bed head, you're beautiful soft brown skin. I love you. I know you act as if you hate me and don't like me. But i like you a lot and that hasn't change from when we were kids"

Garroth says stroking my face. I huff softly embarrassed for myself. "hell you can ask my dad he'll tell you how much of a hopeless romantic I am. My relationships never last because I don't love them. Not even a like. With you it's that times one hundred. You have my heart." He chucked and stood up slowly still being injured and sore.

"As for the virgin part. " He said making a nervous face. My head went down and I sighed. I should of know. How can someone that hot be a virgin "I can tell you I am one thousand percent a virgin. Believe me if i couldn't last a month with a girl why would i even want to sleep with one " He laughed picking my head up and kissing my lips. "I want you to be my first time. The things I can imagine doing to you baby boy " He said huskily.

I literally couldn't help but to blush my face away. "You're my first but I am pretty sure I've made that obvious by now. The only two boys I've kissed where for spin the bottle eighth grade year. But you. You're my first, my only. " I say standing up and grabbing his face bringing it down to mine.

He didn't hesitate to lock lips with me either. We were the only ones up in the house. Like most nights. It was just us and my puppy. I wish it could be like this forever. But sadly he'd have to leave sooner or later.

"I know your sick of me leaving those pretty lips of yours but... i want to make it official. I want you to be with me. I promise Laurance I won't hurt you like I did in the past. I want to be with you forever. You know that right... Please please be my boyfriend. When you're ready i'm ready" Garroth begged. I stared at him dumbfounded and connected our lips.

"Give me time Garroth. I promise we will be together    I just want everything to be okay at your home. I promise you I like you so much. My mood swings just kick in sometimes. ya know" I say. He gently pushes me down on the bed and crawls in top of me. He smirk and the night continues of neck kisses and making out in the moonlight.

i wouldn't change that for the world.
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I miss writing this book. It's so nice and Chill snd it's not rushing anything in their "relationship" very nice.