OoOoO

After days upon days of drifting endlessly, caught in the tow of a powerful current around the southeastern coast of Goran, Vinie was beginning to wonder if The Hanara Desert ever ended. The desert was all they could see in either direction before them, stretching on endlessly into a vast, brown-ish yellow blur at both ends of the horizon. It felt strange; to see so much dry, desiccated land, yet all the while to be floating along atop the crystalline waters of The Boundless Sea.

There was a storm brewing inland; Vinie could see the darkened clouds looming over distant sandy dunes. A strike of lightning touched down, followed by a moody rumble. Whether the storm would travel south towards the coast – and Undor's makeshift armada – was hard to tell. Another other flash of lighting. Vinie wondered what grew in a desert after the rains.

With a soul-deep sigh, Vinie turned from the railing to begin her morning circuit. She set out along the main deck, picking her way through the listless congestions of people. Though the unnatural current summoned by the sea serpent may have been carrying the Undorian refugee fleet ever onward around the coast, aboard the ships there was little to nothing to do but wait. Even the dhow's crew could scarcely keep themselves occupied; they wandered about, retying this knot or checking this tackle, their skills unneeded to assist the current's inexorable power.

Rather than sit and stare at the desert or sea in turns, like so many others, Vinie preferred to channel her helpless boredom by pacing the deck. Making the rounds not only gave her a chance to stretch her healing limbs; it was also an opportunity to check up on everyone else aboard the dhow.

She found Bakko right where she had left him only moments ago, scouring out the pot in which they had cooked their breakfast of whale meat. It saddened Vinie to see how her father's narrow back and shoulders were beginning to take on the same guarded, bony hunch that they had had during their time as fugitives in Moaan. At least Bakko did not seem to be losing weight yet. This was in no small part thanks to the carcass of the right whale – or rather, the butchered skeleton – had just yesterday sunk to its final resting place.

The people of Undor had been careful to ensure that not a single piece of the precious creature went to waste. All of the meat was cut into thin strips, making use of the powerful ocean sun and every available inch of deck space to spread it out for curing. The blubber they harvested for lantern oil, finally freeing Ijireen from the task of sustaining her little magical flames. Even the baleen from the whale's mouth had been saved; folk twisted long strands of it together to replace the line in their fishing rods.

Between the whale and the revived presence of fish in these waters, the Undorians were no longer in any immediate danger of starving. They could use more fresh water though, and so Vinie hoped that the inland storm might come their way. The sea would provide, as it always had done for their people. Or, conversely, a sudden squall might dash their ships upon the Hanara Desert's rocky shores. Either possibility existed in equal measure, and at this point Vinie was too tired to resist the designs of fate.

After a brief pause to help her father with the rest of the dishes, Vinie continued on her route around the deck. Glancing out to sea, she spotted the StormRider, the caravel looming large amidst Undor's motley collection of household vessels. No doubt Captain Dagaan and his first mate Ebn were contending with similar tedium aboard their own ship. It was still comforting to know that they were there...apart from Xolani and Oesu's dhow, they were the only ship capable of mounting any sort of defense in the event of an attack.

Speaking of the Lord and Lady of Undor, the pair were in their usual spot atop the quarterdeck, studying maps of the coast and no less futilely surmising what kind of welcome might await them in Derbesh. Today Ijireen was with them, looking distinctly unimpressed with their efforts to extract information about the Gorian Magicol from her.

"And the Green Ovate – Roran, you said his name was – would you say his abilities are close to that of a full Obad?"

Ijireen shrugged at Oesu. "Not really. Last I knew, he still couldn't use waking magic."

"But Davenir, the Grey Obad, he can?" asked Xolani.

The little green parrot whom he had gone to such lengths to rescue from the burning of Moaan sat perched on his shoulder, her golden beak mirroring the gleam of Xolani's arm in the hazy sunlight. Lack of proper upkeep was beginning to show; tarnish darkened the seams of both false appendages. This hardly seemed to trouble the bird, who set about using her new beak to preen.

"I already told you he could. The BlackPearl told you as much too when she explained what happened in The Lair."

"A great deal happened in The Lair, Bright Eyes," Xolani pointed out. "Not all of which makes any sense. You say that it was Obads' magic which conjured the storm? Someone in the Magicol?"

Vinie could hear the bristling in Ijireen's voice even as she passed on by to climb the ladder to the stern.

"The storm was magic. Who else here would know better what elemental magic looks and feels like than me? And no, One Hand, it was not anyone in the Magicol who conjured it. It must have been Margalee, or Master Tomur, or both of them...wherever they are."

Debates about Obads and magic were a subject that Vinie was only too happy to leave to others. Pulling herself up onto the poop deck with a wince – her palms were still very raw, and did not appreciate being used to grip – she was unsurprised to find Kiiss, Ekene, and the other Stargazers more or less separate from the rest at the back of the ship. Southern-born though they may have been, the assassins and their guild had enough of a reputation that even their own people remained wary of them. Out of their crocodile skin armour and masks, sprawling lethargically around the rear of the ship, surrounded by their somber and equally listless children, the Stargazers hardly seemed a frightening bunch. Even so, the intensity of Ekene's gaze as she greeted Vinie with a curt nod served as an instant reminder that these people had until recently made a career out of death.

"Anything yet?" asked Vinie, noting the fishing rods leaned against the stern railing.

"A few mackerel, and even a small red snapper," said Okoreo. He jerked his head toward where Dalar was working to clean the latest catch, watched hungrily by her young son.

"Good."

It was one less thing to worry about, at least. Everyone's relief had been palpable when the waters around them began yielding fish again, once clear of The Bay of Torbos.

There was one child, however, who seemed uninterested in the prospect of fresh fish. When Vinie approached Kiiss, who sat on a barrel with her youngest grandchild in her lap, the now-orphaned Obi turned and hid her little face.

"Still not talking?"

Kiiss shook her head, smiling joylessly. "Not today, I think...perhaps later. Isn't that right, Obi? Perhaps later?"

The child curled into an even tighter ball on Kiiss's lap.

"If there's anything I can do-" began Vinie, but Kiiss was quick to cut her off.

"You've got enough on your hands as it is, Firebelly. She'll be alright, in time. I'll be watching over her, and her aunts, uncle, and cousins will too. But, still, to lose both parents changes the shape of a child's heart, no matter how much family surrounds them. Love and patience are what's needed now."

A stab of guilt ran through Vinie. She had yet to speak more than a handful of words at a time to young Zaneo and Tani. Where Sahar's boys had disappeared off to after breakfast, Vinie had no idea. Gideo had also vanished, but Vinie knew exactly where to. These days he was spending more and more time hidden away belowdecks. Sometimes he tended to the trio of zebras, but more often than not Gideo was either sleeping...or pretending to sleep. Kiiss's talk of family thrust into sharp relief the tattered ruin of Vinie's own makeshift family.

Her despair must have shown in her face; Kiiss motioned toward a nearby tackle box, indicating for Vinie to sit.

"Gideo lost both his parents young too," Vinie said after a minute, not sure where else to begin. "They died in a boating accident. He was fourteen at the time."

"Yas, I know. He told me as much, during the year in Amenthere."

"And now, Sahar's boys are even younger than that. What did you mean, when you said 'to lose both parents changes the shape of a child's heart'?"

Obi was working up the nerve to risk peeking up at Vinie from behind the folds of Kiiss's sun-worn dress. Kiiss ran a hand down the little girl's back and sighed heavily.

"There are few things more crushing than feeling alone in the world. After all the years you spent getting intimately acquainted with the inside of an Utunman prison cell, you ought to know than better than most, yas?"

Vinie shuddered to think of those long, empty years spent alone in the gloom. Her only comfort had been the hope that, in the outside world beyond the prison, her father, Gideo, and Sahar had all been alive and well and free. If it hadn't been for them, she didn't know what she would have done, even after her escape.

When Vinie told Kiiss this, the ArtSeller seemed to have expected as much. "Now imagine coming out of that cell into a world turned on its head, with everyone you know either gone...or so burdened with their own troubles, they can scarcely make time for yours."

There was no accusation in Kiiss's statement, only plain-spoken fact. It still hurt; knowing that she could not give Gideo, Zaneo, or Tani the warmth and comforting stability which she herself had received on that first night of freedom over Gideo's shop.

"What do I do, Kiiss? What can I do?"

A sudden slam from the quarterdeck interrupted Kiiss before she could answer. Xolani could be seen below, throwing up his brown and golden arms in frustration while Oesu massaged her temples. Apparently, Ijireen had decided she was through with being questioned about the Gorian Magicol.

"Speaking of lost children," murmured Vinie.

"Yas, from what I've seen, that one has a particularly bad case of it. If Xolani and Oesu are thinking they want to keep that girl, their approach has been a marvelous failure thus far."

An uncharitable snort escaped Vinie. "It's easier imagining Mahir as sane than it is to picture the Lord and Lady of Undor as parents. Or me as a parent, for that matter..."

"Why do you say that, Firebelly?"

"What do I know of children, Kiiss? Especially children who have gone through as much as Zaneo and Tani. Gideo and my father spent nearly ten years getting to know those boys...watching them grow up...being part of their lives. They don't know me as anything more than a stranger who spreads chaos and ruin in her wake. I've brought them nothing bu-Agh! Hey!"

A smart pinch to her arm from Kiiss's nails made Vinie jump. Kiiss headed off any protests from Vinie with another poke.

"Name one instance where self-pity actually helped anyone, hmmm?

"Erm..."

"That's what I thought. Now then-" Kiiss took a moment to resettle Obi, who was resisting her cousins' attempts to catch her attention by once again hiding her face. "Here we are, all of us penned up together on a boat, with precious little to do and nowhere to go. If you don't have the time to spare now for people who need just that from you, when will you ever? I built an empire out of collecting valuables, but the entire contents of my safehouses put together couldn't have bought the most precious thing of all. You can't imagine how much I would have given to have had just a little more time with my sons."

How anyone could lose four children to the king's laws and still be able to sit there, casually doling out love and wisdom in equal measures, both astounded and humbled Vinie. Memories of their first meeting with the ArtSeller resurfaced, including her and Gideo's initial reactions, which had been decidedly unfriendly.

"I owe you an apology, Kiiss," she said. "I misjudged you when first we met."

Kiiss shrugged, unruffled. "No, you didn't; you read what I gave you and judged accordingly. You think I go around wearing my heart on my sleeve for every new introduction? Speaking of which, if you ever tell Xolani and Oesu that I think with anything other than a coin purse and an eye for pretty things, I will make good on a threat Gideo once made, and have Ekene and the others toss you overboard to feed the sea serpent!"

"Never, not a word." Vinie held up a swollen finger to her lips, sealing the promise.

"Good. Now, get up and go find those boys of yours! I think someone else will be needing that seat in a few moments here."

Sure enough, when Vinie looked up, she was surprised to find Bakko pulling himself up the ladder onto the poop deck. Ordinarily her father kept to the main deck and the hold, owing to his stiff leg. Despite the apparent effort it took to navigate the transition from ladder to deck, Bakko still greeted them with a brief smile.

"Eish, so this is where you lot all spend your days hiding out."

Eyeing the Stargazers, he pulled his cane out of his belt and tested it on the planks. The Stargazers, likewise, eyed Bakko right back. Most of the other Undorians aboard Xolani and Oesu's dhow didn't even make it past the initial stare-down before giving way and scuttling clear of the assassins' impromptu lair. Bakko just leaned nonchalantly on his cane, and Kiiss tutted.

"Alright now Okoreo...Dalar...you already know that Bakko doesn't bite. No need to get all prickly."

Vinie hurried to stand and offer her father the tacklebox where she had been perched. "Here Baba, come sit here."

"You didn't need to get up, Vinie, I can stand," Bakko protested, even though he was halfway to seated already. "Besides, where are you going in such a rush?"

"To find Zaneo and Tani. Any idea where they are?"

Nodding his approval, Bakko lifted a finger to point subtly upward into the sails. Or rather, to point toward the lookout perch atop the mizzen mast.

"Go on now, before you start stalling again. We'll be just fine here, especially with Bakko now here to keep Obi and I company, hmmm?"

Sure enough, little Obi dared a quick, curious peek up at the new arrival. Vinie indulged in one last, brief moment of private sorrow. People like Bakko, Kiiss, and even Ekene seemed to know instinctively how to care for children. To her, thanks to so many wasted years spent behind bars, the role of a parent was something utterly unfamiliar and foreign.

Despairing over what she lacked would hardly make up for such shortfalls, however. Resolved to finally start living up to Sahar's legacy, Vinie made her way down to the quarterdeck and started climbing up the rigging to the mizzen mast.

OoOoO

Sure enough, when Vinie pulled herself up onto the ledge from the rigging, she was greeted by two pairs of incredulous brown eyes. From the looks of things, Zaneo and Tani had been in the midst of a game of knucklebones; Zaneo's hand hovered in midair, about to sweep down over the scattered fish bones between them.

"What do you want?" Tani demanded with all the stern authority of a seven-year-old.

The elder of the two brothers, Zaneo was far more diplomatic. "Does Babati need help with the breakfast cleanup?"

"No, we already took care of that. I just wanted to talk is all."

"Talk? About what?" Tani's young face tightened suspiciously. "Are we in trouble for something?"

Realizing she was already in over her head, Vinie opted for the only approach she knew; the direct one. "No, you're not in trouble. I wanted to talk to you boys about...about your mother."

The reaction was as instantaneous as it was contrasting. Zaneo's brown eyes turned glassy, his previously curious face falling. Tani, on the other hand, crossed his arms in a huff.

"What's there to talk about? She's dead, and so is Baba." Despite the severity of Tani's glare, the tiniest little quaver managed to sneak its way into his declaration.

Vinie persevered. "Yas, she is. But before she died, Sahar was both your mother and my best friend. Don't you think that she deserves to still be talked about, even though she's gone?"

"Mama used to talk about you, sometimes," offered Zaneo shyly. He rubbed at his eyes with the back of a hand, but soldiered onward. "And about the other Zaneo...the old one who I'm named for. We could always tell that thinking about you made her sad though."

"What would she say?" asked Vinie.

"She said that you were her best friend too." Zaneo was having to work valiantly to hold back tears as he spoke now. "She also said that you were really brave, and not afraid of anything."

"Everyone is afraid of something," Vinie countered. "They're just not always able to admit it. You know what I'm afraid of?"

"What?"

"I'm afraid of bad things happening to the people I care about. I'm also afraid that, when something bad does happen, I won't be there to protect them."

"You weren't there to protect our mother," pointed out Tani. "Even though you keep calling her your best friend. She was pretending to be you, and that's why Mahir took her and Baba."

The simmering anger behind Tani's stare was beginning to make at least a little sense. To make Sahar's death make any kind of sense was impossible, especially when it had been such a senseless act. How could Vinie begin to explain to Sahar's death to her sons, when she herself was only just now learning to live with it? To live with the guilt? Again, the honest truth was all that Vinie could fall back on.

"When I started the Factionist...started the rebellion, I wanted to change so many things. But, most importantly, I wanted to change the world into a place where my friends and family would always be safe and free. Going against Mahir turned out to be bigger and more dangerous than I ever even imagined. If I had known how things would turn out...I don't know if I would do it all over again." Vinie's next admission shocked even herself. "Probably not. But I don't get to go back and change the past. Since I can't protect your mother anymore, I want to do right by her, by looking out for the two of you."

"We don't want a new Mama," sniffed Zaneo. "We want her."

Vinie's voice and heart were breaking, but this was the most that she had spoken to either Zaneo or Tani since the three of them had met. Even if Tani's stare continued to be filled with resentment, and Zaneo's grief called out for a mother which she could not live up to, Vinie was determined not to give up.

"I want Sahar back too. And I swear that I don't want to ever replace your mother; I couldn't even if I tried. Do you think though, since we have loving and missing your mother in common, you could give me a second chance at protecting your family? This time, I promise I'll never be further than a call away."

Zaneo and Tani exchanged a look, communicating silently with one another in the manner of siblings. Vinie was left to wait in uncertainty, perched precariously on the furthest edge of the lookout perch. A sudden sense of presence filled the salty air around the three of them, and although Sahar did not speak, Vinie knew her friend's spirit was watching. She even dared to lean slightly backward, reveling in the sensation of being embraced from behind by the wind.

Whether the boys could sense Sahar's presence or not, something seemed to soften in them. There was no outright declaration of acceptance...but Zaneo held out the knucklebone ball toward Vinie.

"Want to play?"

Vinie smiled and nodded. "Sure. You know, when I was your age, nobody in all of Utunma was better at knucklebones than your mother."

They spoke little afterwards, except to comment occasionally on who was winning or losing. It wasn't a companionable silence, but it was comfortable. Earning Zaneo and Tani's trust would be a challenge, but it was not the most worrisome task presently before Vinie.

What made her most uneasy was the prospect of confronting Gideo, and the deep, crushing melancholy which threatened to steal away the man she loved.

OoOoO

All throughout the day, Gideo never once made an appearance above decks. When Vinie went down into the hold after sundown, she found him already curled up in a corner on the scrap of sackcloth which they had scrouged for a bed. The dhow's hold was hardly a private place; dozens of Undorians were also settling down to sleep, most sprawled on the ground while others took their turns in the handful of hammocks on board. In the dark, close air belowdecks, the line between shelter and suffocation was slim.

Vinie made a snap decision. Rather than lie down beside Gideo's inert form, she leaned over and gave a sharp tug on the sackcloth. Although Gideo was too big for her to displace, the sudden movement still got his attention.

"Come with me."

"Where are we going?" Gideo's voice was rough, hoarse more from lack of use than smoke at this point.

"Above."

When Vinie waited with her hands on her hips, making it clear she had no intention of going wordlessly to sleep, Gideo eventually gave in. Stiffly, bandaged hands held out awkwardly in front of him, he maneuvered his way up to stand and follow.

Vinie led them up onto the forecastle deck at the very front of the ship. The inland thunderstorm had never reached them; the night air hung calm and still. The current kept them moving relentlessly onward though, always onward toward the distant walls of The Weeping Keep.

Although it was an overcast night, a few stray stars could still be glimpsed, peeping through at random. A faint glow behind the clouds betrayed the presence of a waxing autumn moon. As Vinie laid out their makeshift bed before the bowsprint, the cloud-cover wavered, allowing a fattened crescent to glide into view.

"Here."

Laying down, Vinie stretched out and patted the space beside her. The deck was hard, and their bed was rough, but the air at least was cool and clean. Best of all, there was no one else here but the lookout, and they remained silent at their post on the quarterdeck.

After Gideo managed to get himself laid down – as difficult and painful looking as if he were a far older man – Vinie let him keep his silence for a few more minutes. Lying there, looking up at the veiled stars, she took the opportunity to gather her thoughts. Whatever was weighing on Gideo's mind, it couldn't be more terrible than this endless silence.

"Gideo...talk to me."

Unsurprisingly, it took a while for Gideo to answer. "I haven't been myself lately, have I? I'm sorry...I'll be better tomorrow."

That's not what I meant. Talk to me. Tell me what's going on, please."

Gideo swallowed hard, hard enough for Vinie to hear even over the lapping of the sea. Rolling onto her side, she propped herself up on one elbow to stare beseechingly.

"Please, luv."

"I shouldn't. The thoughts in my head are ugly, and don't deserve to be put into words." Gideo's word trailed off into a whisper. "Especially words that you would listen to."

"I don't care, tell me anyways," insisted Vinie.

"...Was it worth it? All of this?"

A sense of déjà vu came over Vinie as she remembered the conversation she had had with Zaneo and Tani earlier that day. It was quickly followed by sorrow and stinging guilt.

"I don't know. I don't know what I thought would happen, when we started the rebellion against Mahir-"

"When you started the rebellion. The rest of us never really had much choice in the matter, did we? Once that ball started rolling, there was no stopping it...no matter how many people it crushes."

Vinie was floored. She thought she could almost feel her heart stutter to a stop. Ever since fleeing Utunma, her father and Gideo at her side, Vinie had always assumed that the three of them were in this together, of the same mind in wanting to see Mahir's reign brought to an end. She had never even considered that Gideo felt differently, especially after all the times he had reassured and encouraged her over the years.

"After what he did to Zaneo...I couldn't just slink away and leave Mahir to his throne, leave him dictating the shape of our lives and laws. I just couldn't. Could you live like that, Gideo, with the man who murdered Zaneo reigning unchallenged?"

"If it meant living in peace, with Sahar and Jaafi, Margalee, Dhalad and Yidu's parents, and all the rest still alive?" Gideo turned his tired, drawn face toward Vinie in the darkness. "And what about Xolani, and all the other people who've been forever maimed? Or every southerner who's now lost everything to the fire? All of that, weighed against revenge on Mahir...Yas, Vinie, I think I could have lived with the man on his throne. But I knew you couldn't, and we all loved you too much to let you fight him alone."

A tear escaped to slide down Vinie's cheek. Surely, she must be drowning, because try as she might, she couldn't pull air into her strangled lungs. Just barely, she managed to choke out a whisper.

"I'm sorry. Gideo, I am so sorry. I didn't know what I was doing...I never did, right from the start. I thought...I thought that, after ten years in prison, I knew what the consequences of going against Mahir looked like. But I was wrong, I was so wrong. Everyone around me is in pain, and I can't even protect them from what's ahead. I'm so very, very sorry...I brought this upon us all, especially you. I should never have left you alone in Danitesk. Being with me put you in terrible danger, and you almost died for it. Sahar did die for it...for a crazy, selfish idea that had no business ruining anyone's life except my own. I'm sorry, Gideo, I'm sorry!"

Gideo's breath hitched sharply. The night was deepening, and it was difficult for Vinie to make out his expression through her tears.

"...I'm sorry too. You didn't force any of us to follow you, Vinie. I walked into this fire with my eyes wide open. I shouldn't have said what I said, just now." Gideo looked away. "Like I said, my thoughts have been too ugly to bear talking about. I wish you hadn't asked."

"I wish I hadn't either," croaked Vinie. "But I'd prefer you tell me that you hate me, rather than all this awful silence."

That, at last, pulled a reaction from Gideo. Sitting bolt upright, he grabbed her by the shoulder despite his clumsy, bandaged fingers.

"I do not hate you. I just...I hate this war...this whole terrible rebellion. I hate everything that it's cost, and even more than that, I hate what it might still cost us yet. I lie awake at night, thinking of the fire...thinking of Utunma burning. My mind plays over and over again might have happened if the StormRider hadn't been there for Bakko and the boys, or if everyone hadn't been able to escape Moaan in time. I lost-" Gideo's words suddenly choked off.

"But we all did escape the fire," Vinie ventured carefully. "Baba, the boys, Kiiss, you and I, we all made it out."

"I lost one family, Vinie. Then another, when Zaneo and his parents died. I can't bear the thought of losing another. I won't survive being left alone in the world again; I just don't have that kind of strength in me anymore."

Slowly, gently, Vinie reached up and placed a hand atop Gideo's on her shoulder. Both their faces glistened wet with tears in the moonlight. And yet, oddly enough, through all of the hurt and the grief, Vinie felt reassured for the first time since the fire that Gideo was not lost to her.

"I made a promise to the boys earlier today. I swore to them that I would never leave them alone again. If...if you'll believe me, Gideo, then I'll make the same vow to you. Wherever we go now, we'll go together. And I also promise that, from now on, I'm going to listen to you, and to Baba too. I'm done making decisions on my own. If you say something is too great a risk to take, then we won't take it. You mean everything to me, and if you're willing to let me try again, then I promise to start living with you as husband and wife, instead of lieutenant and general."

Rather than answer, Gideo leaned in. Their foreheads came to rest together, as they once had during a misty summer morning on the rooftops of Falerik. The both of them breathed out together, and at last dared to set down some of the burdens they had until now been carrying alone.

"Come on, let's get some sleep. We'll likely be seeing the Beson Inlet any day now."

Vinie nodded, and let Gideo guide her down to rest on the deck. She was just too drained to keep her eyes open anymore. For the first time in what felt like months though, Vinie drifted off into sleep to the comforting rhythm of Gideo's steady heartbeat.   

OoOoO