Some Random Guy (SRG): "You suck."

Me: "What?!?!" *scowls*

SRG: "Are you deaf? I said you suck!" *laughs*

Me: *sees a lamp in the corner and inches towards it*

SRG: *keeps laughing*

Me: *whispers* "Your gonna be sorry when this is over." *smashes lamp on his head*

SRG: "OOF!!!" *falls over unconscious*

A few minutes later...

Police: "Ma'am, would you mind telling me what happened here?" *points to the guy*

Me: "Uh, it's called 'accidentally breaking a lamp'. Doi."