Chapter One The Found and Profound Rose of Love.

There is a time in your life when you wonder, when will I find the mystery of love will I be chosen by destiny to find her or him? Will it be true, and will it last? For I've thought these words without thinking what I was searching for was always told to be not real. I was told love is a chemical reaction in the brain like a drug. But I soon learnt that drugs are already in the brain. Love can be like looking for that next wave. She/he may be there, and she/he may not.

I never got that chance to realise that it's my choice when, or if  Evan I am to meet them,

I find myself 29 and almost 30, unaware that the activities are that I have had love but did not feel it myself. Even though I was young,  I did not know I was being loved.  I never felt it in my heart. And I have been around the bus,  so I know my way around
I just never felt it in my heart like, it's more that I didn't give it a chance to grow to flower like a closed rose that has not seen the sun I feel alone and unworthy of love and the way it feels for a symbolic love that his both ways

I was always ignorant of who loved me due to me thinking love was but a distant memory lost in the Age before I was born. But I don't think so anymore. Love can be freeing and open. You just have to be willing to meet her or him halfway.

As a young man, I realised love was more then just fantasy it was reality. Complex coincidence forged relationships over millions of years in the hearts of human culture. For someone who can say they are good-looking and have confidence doing so. Myself needed to change, and so I went through an ego trip for 15 years of writing and reading listening and learning. Staying silent when I wanted to yell and realising bye the argument was not me, it was the ego. Separation of that ego became more dangerous as I discovered I had depression and anxiety.

Whether that was love for a friend who,  as I had many. I would say I love you to only my closest friends. And Evan female friend,  I would not say I love you in fear.

As a male, I was never looking for love when I was young, being self-confident and imaginative always got in between forging a long-term relationship. As someone who has fallen in love with everyone I meet. I learnt that the love I felt was admiration for that person for being who they are, with no boundaries. But that got me in a lot of trouble. When I felt strange, and my anxiety, I never knew I had affected my mind and how I operated in life. What made the most sense was to not date, and have an an intermediate relationship, and Evan went without primal and, instinctive feelings of attraction. It's been exactly 10 years since I have been with anyone. I can calmly say I'm still waiting for her. And love to be forged within a new relationship, not an old one. And with someone who understands my mind, my soul, and how I operate life's joystick.

There's the word of my first petal of love.

The first peta,  if closed and never opened, leaves you with nothing. Fear is the biggest heart closer of all time. If you want to tell a girl you think she's beautiful. Then do it, do it right away as soon as you see her.

When I was a tee,  about 14-1,  I went through a part of my confidence that flowered. I didn't give a dam what people think say or do. I just did it. If there was a girl I thought was beautiful,  I would go up to her and ask her straight up.
Can I have your number? If I was turned down,  no problem,  I would not let that get to me. As if she doesn't like you,  that's okay. There are billions of people in the world. You will get your chance if you never give up. But remember,  don't be a speedbag. If she doesn't like you,  then respect that and leave her alone.

You will know if she likes you, and she will make sure you have her phone number right.

Love is inescapable. But you don't want to confuse love with obsession. Love is different from obsession. You will have to get your heart broken a few times to recognise the difference. Don't let him get to you. But also,  don't be a player or a dick either. As you don't want to be left alone when you'reoldd. It is a nightmare in itself. As you wake up each day with anxiety due to feeling alone,  Evan has so many people around you. You,  never feel close to anyone again as you get older. Things that bothered you when you were 20 don't seem so bad when you're 30. And people older than you, start to look more like your own age as you search for someone your age, that's the key 2-year buffer when you 25+.

But don't listen to me, find your way this is just for those who feel too much, and fear love not being real when it is real it's how we perceive reality that determines your position on love itself. Knowledge is key to the power of love. And empathy, understanding, and developing relationships.

But being old doesn't mean your days are done and if anything you just starting.

If you want to appreciate or be loved first, you must open up. Open your heart yourself and let him/her know you feel this way. If you don't trust or try, you will never feel love pumping through your heart.

When you are young you think you know everything, that the hope and dreams of your life will come true. You will become what you said you would in your younger days. Face it, we never become what we say we will when we grow up. Becoming that just means you don't change. That means you will always be the same and do the same, and that simply is not true.

Human nature is always changing. Of we ride the waves of life like we are supposed to. Live can bring us all treasure. A peculiar large part of being human is changing. Change who you believe you are and who you are stuck being because nobody wants to be a 40-year-old man who still thinks they are 18. It's just not the same as being the same.

For example, there are 14 aspects of the love called Rose that we all have in common. The first is finding love, and that will take everything you have to change adaptation. Witt will come in handy when you are never giving up. Your first goal is to open your first petal. The flower of judgement. Judge others at your sanity. If you think someone is what they look like, then you are wrong. Dead wrong.

For example.

A man walking into a Coffin Shop orders 2 coffees.

" Hey, can I get 2 coffees, please?" If he said what type of coffee the man behind the counter didn't need to ask. He would have an easy job.

But instead, the man asking the customer said this.

" What type of coffee do you want."

The customer then continues.

"Oh, I don't know what you call them."

As the staff asking the question now realised he didn't ask for the chapp or latte. He then assumed the man did not order coffee, which often pointed to the list of types of coffee they sell.

The customer then continued to look hard at the list and then said.

"chapp with 2 white."

But the staff then assumed what he said.

"Here's 2 chapp with 2 shuger."
And the customer walks off taking the coffee home.

He gets home, but his sister who orders coffee all the time says.

Is this a flat white, no whip chapp with no shuger?

The brother who only drinks coffee from home doesn't understand. So he gets into an argument, and they fall out over a simple mix-up with coffee.

This is where communication comes in viral importance. You must have all the facts before you assume or blame fault on someone who didn't do a thing wrong.

The customer, the brother, is what comes to mind when you think of these 2 words.

Customer
Brother

Well, brother, unless you have a sister or brother, you will not know what it's like to have one. To have a forever beat friend that will always be there no matter what. But you may have a friend or close relative to relate to. Experience my friend's experience.

Unless you are close to your family you can't understand the truth or hidden love that's behind an aspect of life you may say I can understand but unless you have grown up with a real brother, you don't know what it's really like to have one.

A sister and a sister are different from a brother and a brother.

Why? You ask

Love is in many, I can not tell you how to think but I can help with knowledge.

The best way to feel what another is truly feeling is perspective. To understand is to perceive. That's the next chapter or petal. The second petal is the Petal of Perception.