I just want to be happy again please help, I don't even have the will power to get up nowadays and face the world I need help and I'm scared I'm really really scared I can't even cry anymore and I just sit in bed and stare at the wall and I think about how much I fucking hate myself and it hurts but I can't say anything to anyone and I just can't take shit sometimes and I blow up and sometimes I have to bottle it all up and smile and it makes me feel like shit and I can't take it help