I feel like I can't be friends or be in love with anyone without ending up hurting them, I've hurt so many of my friends, pushing them away and making them leave. 

I can't seem to love, I can't feel it, the butterflies as you call it, when they leave I can feel the pain. I was made just to feel pain and depression.

I've hurt 4 important people in my life, just cuz I'm an idiot. 

I'm really not made to make friends, I'm just a lone wolf