Chapter 44: Fears and Promises.

*

"Bear with me Oh Heart,

This pain is temporary."

-2am-

*

The night was turning cold. Nahal inched into her long sleeved dress, one that provided not so much cover and warmth against the weather. The winds rustled past her ears, ruffling the lose bangs of her hair. She scoffed silently. I should have been home, sketching. At a sudden, she felt warmth over her body and smiled to the side. Yahyah's scent drifted into her nostrils, sending her heart on overdrive. She titled her head to the side to see him walking a little behind her, his hands stuffed in his jean pockets. She sighed slightly before turning to the others, who were walking in pairs ahead of them. 

She then turned to Yahyah and smiled slightly. Yahyah ignored her and kept walking. She frowned and halted. He halted right before he could bump into her. She looked up to his beautiful eyes and frowned slightly. What have I done?

"Can- Can we talk?" she questioned him and he raised one of his perfect eyebrows.

"Please?" she muttered and he sighed before nodding anyway. He pulled out his phone and texted someone, as Nahal fidgeted. Now or never.

"Let's walk back to the car park while we talk" he said, putting his phone in his jeans. She nodded before turning on the path. Yahyah was towering beside her and she let out a small smile at it. Protected. Safe.

"What is it?" he asked her, his voice; monotone. She could not detect anything from it. Why is he so........ cold? Distant. That's what he is.

"I- I wanted to apologize" There. Part of it is done.

"What for?" Okay. So there is A LOT I need to apologize to him for but don't rub it in, Yahyah!

"Everything" He let out a cold chuckle at it.

"Sure" She frowned. Why is he being so cold?

"I am serious" she said, after a moment of silence. She hadn't realized that she was no longer walking beside him. She stood with her head up, looking at him with fury. He looked back to her with a sadistic smile. This is not Yahyah.

"I know. Let's forget about it, shall we?" he said and she frowned. I am making amends.

"Yahyah" she whispered looking at the dew covered grass, suddenly all fury gone. She felt him step a little closer.

"Don't do that" she heard him say and forced herself to look up to him. His eyes were glistening under the dim lights of the park. Tears. Why is he crying?

"Do what?" she managed out, her ribs constricting her lungs or so she felt like they did.

"Cry. Don't shed tears in front of me and expect me to feel nothing" He told her and she frowned.

"I'm not-"she felt hot tears on her hand from where her fingers grazed her cheeks. She was crying. Why am I crying?!

"I didn't know" she muttered. He sighed, running his hand through his hair.

"What is wrong with you, Nahal?" he questioned her and she looked away, her hands busily trying to dry the tears that betrayed her. If only I knew, Yahyah. If only I knew.

"I- I don't want- I don't want to lose you" she stuttered through her sentence. This earned silence from Yahyah. She finally gathered the courage to look up to him. Brown eyes met his hazel ones, which flashed multiple emotions at once. She could not decipher which one made her heart clench, like multiple thorns stabbing it. She did not realize she had such a power over this man.

"I- I am sorry. I am sorry I let you go. I am sorry I said I did not want anything to do with you. I was scared, Yahyah. I was scared that........ what if we- what if we end up........ what if we end up like our- our parents?" she said the latter in a small voice, as hot tears flooded her cheeks. She hated it. It hurts. But less. Less than what I have been suffering for so long. She felt her energy draining, her body almost giving up. A little more, please. A little more and I promise we will be home, safely. She consoled her body to keep up with her. For now.

"You could have told me" she looked up to him, her tears blurring the view. I wish. "You could have told me this was why you always stepped away, Nahal. I love you. There is absolutely no one I would trade for you. I fall for you each day, each moment and I swear by Allah that I would love you forever. You have no idea what I went through all this time, after you said no." he explained and she felt lightheaded. She needed sleep.

"I realized late and I am so sorry" she whispered, holding her head in her hands. Late.

"I am glad you realized it"

"No. I am sorry. I should- I should have talked it out. Communicated through it. I didn't" she replied, looking at him once again. She saw his eyes shining and smiled. I love it when your eyes shine with love. She blushed slightly.

"So what are we?" he asked her, in a small voice. She felt her heart break at the sound of it. He is so afraid I would let him go.

"I don't know. This is new to me"

"Then we'll take it slow."

"Promise me something?" she asked him, with a hopeful voice. He looked down at her with a small smile.

"What?"

"You will not leave me, even when I am being the worst human around. Even when I say no to anything you want, when I am the most horrid looking person you'll ever see, when I go crazy and stuff. You will not give up on me. Promise me" she whispered her darkest fears in a sentence, hoping he'd catch on. And he did. He let out a small smile.

"Only if you promise the same"

"Fine"

"Fine"

"I love you, for the sake of Allah"

Nahal felt a blush crawling her neck. Oh Allah, what had I done in my life to deserve this human?

-

Aanabia walked beside Yazdan, her sneakers squeaking upon making contact with the wet pavement. Yazdan walked silently beside her while an internal storm brews in him. Finally when she had had enough, she turned to Yazdan with a sigh.

"What is it?" she questioned him and he raised an eyebrow at her. She knows I want to talk to her?

"A lot of things actually" he replied, slowing his steps. He looked over to see his oldest brother and his wife already a few meters ahead of them. He looked over his shoulder to see Sahl on his phone behind him. He had halted too. He then turned to Aanabia.

"We need to talk, Yazdan" she stated and he nodded. I know that.

"Let's start?" Aanabia eyed him wearily. What now?

"Fine. So why did you tell the family about me without telling me first?" she questioned him and he frowned. I did tell her first?

"I told you first" he told her and she rolled her eyes.

"I meant, why did you tell them about me without telling me that you were going to tell them about me, first? I would have been prepared!" she scolded him and he let out a small smile. She's so cute when shes angry.

"I did not think you'd be angry. Plus they were bound to find out anyway"

"Of course they were" she muttered to herself.

"What else do we need to clear out?" he asked her with a grin. She glared at him. So cute.

"How do you feel about this whole Nikah thing?" she asked him, looking up to him with her bright onyx eyes. How I feel?

"What do you mean?"

"I know you don't know me that well, you said so. This whole thing is going too fast between you and me. What do you have to say in this?" she asked him. His eyes searched hers for any emotions, but he found none. Too fast? Huh. I didn't realize it.

"So you don't want the Nikah anytime soon?" he questioned her and her eyes narrowed at him. He smirked at her. She leapt up and pulled a strand of his hair that was lose on his face. He let out a loud yelp causing his siblings to turn to him in worry. Aanabia smirked.

"That is what you get for underestimating me!" with that, she held her head high and walked away with a grin plastered over her face.

Yazdan stared after her with a small smile before he jogged over to catch up with her. Stupid, stupid girl.

"So you want it soon" he stated and she shrugged. "I am happy" he added in a low tone, causing her to turn to him. She raised an eyebrow at him.

"I am happy that I got you. I am happy that my prayers were answered." He told her, his gray eyes shining with unshed tears. Aanabia stared into them and felt her heart ache at the sight of tears in his eyes. She forced a tight smile.

"I love you Yazdan. Nothing will change that"

-

Yahyah stared at the changing colors of the lava lamp in front of him. Everyone was scattered around the living room, telling stories and what not. It had been a day since they had been to the park. Yazdan's nikah was yet to be scheduled and he had a feeling his best friend wanted it as soon as possible. He hadn't talked or met Nahal as of yet, save for the Good Morning and Salaam texts in the morning and Good Night and Salaam texts in the afternoon.

What had happened at the park with Nahal was yet to be revealed to anyone. Not even Yazdan knew. Yahyah was still trying to understand what was going on. He had the urge to break things, yell at her, hurt her the way she hurt him. He wanted her to suffer like he did. But he loved her. And his heart would never allow him to hurt her. Even if she hurt me enough. He had returned home happy but in doubt. He did not know if Nahal was playing his heart or if this was real. He kept questioning if she was sincere with it all or was she faking it?

It is not my fault for thinking it. People had left him early in his life, lied to him and betrayed him. He was all too familiar with the concept. But he trusted Nahal despite that. She ended up hurting him too. So it is only fair I doubt everything.

"What are you thinking?" Yazdan questioned him, taking a seat beside him. He snapped out of his thoughts and grinned at Yazdan.

"Nothing. You tell me; why are you delaying the finalizing of the date?" he questioned and Yazdan blushed slightly.

"I am not. I am just......... too afraid to tell them" Yahyah raised an eyebrow at him. Afraid?

"Why?"

"What if they think it is too early?"

"What if they don't think it?" Yahyah questioned back and Yazdan shrugged.

"Well, when do you want it?" Yahyah asked him, smirking. I am so going to burst his bubble.

"A mosque Nikah with just immediate family, probably on a Friday like Kayan bhai's" he replied and Yahyah's face morphed into a full blown grin.

"Okay so it is decided. The nearest Friday" he said and Yazdan shrugged. "I still have to ask Aanabia though" he muttered and Yahyah nodded.

"How about we tell this to mom and see what they say?"

"I am not so sure" Yahyah noted that he was hesitant. Oh Yazdan. He thought evilly.

Yahyah got up smirking at Yazdan and walked over to where Grandmother Zaeef was seated. He took a seat by her feet and smiled up at her. Yazdan sighed and followed Yahyah, taking a seat by her feet. The two looked at each other with knowing looks. Yahyah looked up to Grandmother Zaeef, as she ran her hands through the duo's hair.

"What is it boys?" she asked, laughter in her voice. She knew.

"Umm Daadi mah" started Yahyah and Yazdan interrupted him.

"I have decided the day" he said and grandmother Zaeef only smiled. The boys looked up to her with a confused expression. She knew this too? How?

"What day is it?" she asked calmly and Yazdan fidgeted.

"Nearest Friday. Much like Kayan bhai's Nikah" he explained and the grandmother let out a small laugh before muttering 'They are all alike' Yahyah smiled at Yazdan who grinned back. They high fived before getting up. The two walked out of the house and took a seat at the steps. The air was cold and Yahyah felt like it would rain soon.

"Are you happy?" Yazdan asked Yahyah and the latter frowned.

"Why wouldn't I be?"

"Just because I am getting married does not mean I am leaving you, Yaha. Always remember that you come before anything else, much like family" Yazdan told him and Yahyah let out smile.

"I know. The same goes for you. Except maybe after food. I would-"he would not finish his sentence before he was tackled. The boys' laughter rang through the halls of the house causing everyone to know, the duo were back. 

*****

This is to everyone who were in pain for Yahyah. :) I love you guys, How could I so such a thing to you guys? ❤

| R - C - V |

xx, 

-Aalihha.