TANYA'S POV

"Mommy..." I huriedly wiped my tears away when I heard Therese calling me. I couldn't help but cry as I pack away some of the things he left. Nagmamadali kasi siyang umalis at marami pa siyang naiwan na gamit. Ang ibang mga damit niya, ang pabangon niya, lahat ng bagay na magpapaalala sa kanya. "Mommy, what are you doing with Daddy Wayne's things?"

I swallowed back my tears and tried to compose myself. "I—I need to give his things back to him."

"Why? Isn't he going to come back?" Therese pouted.

"Hindi na babalik dito si Wayne. He has his own home. Tumira lang siya dito panandali to help us adjust in our new home." I explained.

"But he promised... he promised he'd make make me a treehouse. He's not done with it yet."

"Huwag kang mag-alala, sa iba na lang natin ipatatapos ang treehouse mo."

"NO! I don't want anyone else to finish the treehouse! I only want Daddy Wayne!" She folded her arms over her chest and her eyes began to water with tears

"Therese..." Sinubukan ko siyang hawakan pero mabilis siyang umiwas sa akin.

"Can't you make him go back?" She began to cry and sob.

Tears stung my eyes too as I shook my head. Sana nga ganun kadali lang iyon. God knew how bad I wanted to be with him. I had never loved another man like I loved him. Ilang taon akong nangulila sa kanya ngunit sa pangalawang pagkakataon ay nawala ulit siya sa akin.

I couldn't blame him for getting tired of me. Hindi niya kasalanan na napagod na siya na maghintay. Maybe I really didn't deserve him. Siguro nga may ibang mas karapat-dapat sa pagmamahal niya. Mahal na mahal ko si Wayne, alam ko sa sarili ko iyon. Kahit ilang taon na ang lumipas hindi nagbago iyon. But Therese and George needed me. Hindi ko silang pwedeng talikuran.

Tumakbong umiiyak palabas si Therese. Lumabas ako para aluhin siya at nakita kong nakakandong siya kay George at umiiyak.

"Why is my little girl crying? What's the matter?" George asked her.

"I want to see Daddy Wayne..." She sobbed.

Nag-angat ng tingin si George sa akin at nag-tama ang mga mata namin. I could see the hurt that flashed across his eyes.

"Therese, halika nga dito." I motioned for her to come to me.

"No!" She firmly said and jumped off George's lap and ran to her room.

"She misses Wayne..." George sighed and massaged his temples. "I had never seen her that upset, Tanya. She found in him the father that I can't be."

Dahan-dahan kong nilapitan si George at tahimik na umupo sa tabi niya. "George, ano ka ba? Don't say that... She's just having a tantrum."

"But it's true. She's at that age where she needs a father the most and I'm not there for her."

"She's going to be okay. Someday she'll understand that everything you're doing is for her."

"For her and for you, Tanya. I want you and Therese to have a good future. I don't want you to experience again what you went through and I don't want Therese to experience the same thing." He sighed.

"Hindi mararanasan ni Therese iyon hangga't nandito ako. Mahal ko si Therese. I'll protect her, I'll give her my life if I have to." I said.

George smiled but his eyes said otherwise. "I know that and she's lucky for having you. I'm lucky for having you. Thank you for always understanding."

"I know it's hard for you as it is for Therese. Nasa Belgium ang trabaho mo ang... ang asawa mo. Ayaw ko man ilayo siya pero ito ang mas makakabuti para sa kanya. I chose to go back here because I want to protect her. I don't want her to grow up hearing things she shouldn't be hearing. Gusto kong bigyan siya ng normal na buy."

"I want the same thing for the two of you. You know I never want to hide you or Therese but people are cruel. I don't want to expose you to things that could possibly hurt or harm you. I just want you girls to know that even though I'm not always here my love for the both of you only grows stronger. I know I've made a lot of mistakes in my life, I'm not a good man, but you and Therese are not a part of those mistakes. You are the most beautiful things that ever happened to me."

"Oh, George." Maluha-luhang sabi ko.

"Hush, my darling. I don't want to see you cry." He pulled me to him and he kissed me on the forehead.

I had two bites of pancakes and decided I was already full. I sighed and pushed my plate away. Simula nang mawala si Wayne, I tried to keep the normalcy but it was tough. Bawat sulok ng bahay na ito naaalala ko siya. This house was built after our dream. Ito yung bahay na pinangarap namin noon, ito yung bahay na tinirhan niya ng maikling panahon. When he was living with us, I really felt like we were a real family. Him, Therese, and I. Ang sarap magkunwari na nabuo namin ang pamilyang pinangarap namin noon. We were the way before like there were no years between us but I was slapped back to reality.

Tumayo ako at biglang parang nagdilim ang paningin ko. I held the edge of the table to balance myself.

"Tanya." Mabilis na tumayo si George. "Hey, are you okay?"

"I—I'm fine... Nahilo lang ako." Mahinang sabi ko ng muli kong mabawi ang balanse ko.

"You're not fine, darling. Have you seen yourself in the mirror? You look as pale as a ghost." George looked at me, worried.

"Don't worry about me."

"How can I not worry about you. You're not eating enough. You look ill." He said.

"Pagod lang ako."

"Is there's something you're not telling me? Is something bothering you? You've been acting different since I got here."

"Okay lang ako. Kulang lang siguro ako sa tulog. Mabuti pa, umupo ka na lang at tapusin niyo ni Therese ang almusal." I smiled and excused myself to my room. I laid in bed and tears began to seep from my eyes again. Hindi ako makakain o makatulog ng maayos simula ng umalis si Wayne. He was all I could think of.

I took a nap and woke up an hour later. After fixing myself, I went out of the room to see Therese, George, and Wayne in the living room. I instantly stiffened the moment our gaze met. It felt like my heart wanted to leap out of my chest.

"Mommy, Daddy Wayne's here!" Therese said with a huge smile.

"I invited him over. This little girl wants to see him." George fondly said as he looked at Therese.

"Daddy Wayne's making a treehouse for me, Papa." She said.

"He is?"

"Mm-hmm! Aren't you, Daddy?"

Wayne smiled at him, shifting his attention from me. "We'll do it some other day. You want to go out today?"

"Okay. I want to go to the arcade." Excited na sabi ni Therese.

"Okay, we'll go..." He smiled back but his smile disappeared as if he remembered something. He looked at George. "I mean, if you allow me to take Therese out."

"Of course. I called you over so you can spend some time with her. My daughter has missed you so much, you know."

"I missed her too." His eyes softened as he looked at the little girl and then he looked at me. Muling nagtama ang mga mata namin. Biglang tumigas ang ekspresyon sa mukha niya nang magkatinginan kami at siya ang unang umiwas.

"Papa, let's go to the arcade! You're going to love it there."

"Oh no, I'll just stay here. Your old man needs to rest." Sabi ni George bago tumingin sa akin. "Why don't you go with them, Tanya?"

"H—huh?" Napakurap ako.

"Go with them." He urged.

"Okay..." Mahinang sabi ko.

Kinuha ko muna si Therese para ayusan at iniwan ang dalawa sa sala. I dressed her up and got her ready. Pagbalik namin ay nag-uusap at nagtatawanan ang dalawa.

"You three better get going." George said when we got out of Therese's room.

"Are you sure you don't want to go with us, Papa?" Asked Therese.

"As much as I want to, Papa has a lot of work I need to finisih. Come here, just me a kiss." He motioned for Therese to come to him. Lumapit si Therese sa kanya at hinalikan siya sa pisngi.

"Be good, okay?"

"Okay! I love you, Papa!" Sabi ng bata.

"I love you too, sweetheart."

Pagkatapos namin magpaalam kay George ay pumunta na agad si Therese kay Wayne. She grabbed his hand and Wayne stood up. Magkahawak-kamay silang naglakad palabas ng bahay at sumunod ako sa kanila. Wayne opened the door to the backseat and guided Therese inside. He then turned his head to me and I was met with a coldest of stares. I just shrugged and walked, opening the door to the passenger's seat and sliding in. He was the last to get in.

We were inches away from each other. Just inches away. But it felt like we were a million miles apart. He kept a distance from me, physically and emotionally. It was like there was an invisible wall seperating the few inches that was between us.

"Daddy Wayne, are go back to our house?" Tanong ni Therese.

"No, munchkin. I just came here to take you out because I missed you so much." Tinignan ni Wayne ang bata sa rearview mirror.

"I missed you too, Daddy. Did you miss Mommy, too?" She asked.

Suddenly, there was an uncomfortable dead silence. When he didn't answer I felt a painful squeeze in my chest. Doesn't he feel anything for me anymore? I turned my head away and looked out of the window of the car. I didn't want him to see the tears that was beginning to sting my eyes.

"Have you been taking good care of Clifford and Snow White?" Pag-iiba niya.

"Yeah! I feed them every morning after I wake up and before I go to sleep." Therese answered. "Why did you leave? Are you really not coming back?"

Wayne let out a deep exhale. "I'll still visit you..."

"But why can't you live with us again? I miss you and Mommy misses you too, don't you, Mommy?"

"Of course, I do." My voice shook at my own confession. There was no point on denying. I had missed him so much and I wanted him back.

He took a quick glance at me and turned his attention back to the road. His face was absolutely void of expression. He had completely shut me off. Para akong hangin lang kung tratuhin niya ako ngayon.

"See! Bakit ayaw mo pang bumalik?"

"Sometimes missing someone doesn't mean they have to be in your life."

I bit my bottom lip and tightly shut my eyes to keep my tears from falling.

"So you're not coming back?" May halong lungkot sa boses ni Therese.

"Munchkin, it's not that easy. Besides, you have your Papa George now."

"But it's not the same without you..."

"I know but we'll still see each other. I'll visit and take you out every now and then. How does that sound?" Wayne tried to sound cheerful. Therese answered with a shrug.

Dinala kami ni Wayne sa arcade at hinayaan ko silang maglaro. I finally got the chance to be alone with Wayne when Therese decided she wanted to go into the play center where she can play with the other kids. Adults weren't allowed to go in kaya naiwan kaming dalawa sa labas habang pinanonood siyang nakikipaglaro.

"Wayne..." I nervously approached him.

"I'm going to get us something to eat." He shrugged dismissively.

"Kausapin mo naman ako. Hindi ko na kayang ganito tayo." Halos nagmamakaawang sabi ko.

"We have nothing to talk about." Sabi niya habang patuloy sa paglalakad.

Humabol ako sa kanya. "Marami tayong kailangan pag-usapan. Ayaw kong matapos tayo ng ganito na lang."

"I thought we've already gone through this." He said in a bored tone.

"Please, makinig ka naman sa akin. Ipagtatapat ko naman sa kanya ang tungkol sa atin..."

He stopped. I thought he would finally agree to talk me but I was met with a piercing glare. "What more do you fucking want from me, Tanya? Gusto mo ba talagang pinagmumukha akong gago? Natutuwa ka ba kapag pinaghihintay mo ako sa wala? I'm fed up with your games, we both know we're too old for this."

"No, Wayne. Mali ka ng iniisip."

"What do you want me to think then? I've loved you with everything I had but you gave me nothing but false hope. I've let you use me until I was all used up. I placed myself at your disposal and when things got better for you, when I'm no longer convenient in your life, you disposed of me like a garbage you couldn't wait to get rid of."

I shook my head. "Hindi kita ginamit. Ilang beses ko bang sasabihin sa'yo, mahal kita. Pakinggan mo naman ako..."

"Okay. So tell me, what more do you want from me? You already have the old man's money... I know, is it the sex, Tanya? You want me to be your fucking boytoy?"

Umigkis ang palad ko at lumagapak iyon sa pisngi niya. He looked at me with a shock expression on his face as he held his cheek. I let out a small gasp when he took me by my wrist.

"Wayne, ano ba? Saan mo ba ako dadalhin? S—si Therese..." Sinubukan kong kumawala sa pagkakahawak niya pero hindi niya ako hinayaan. Soon he was dragging me out of the mall and into the mall's parking lot. He took me to the darkest corner of it at isinandal niya ako sa malamig na dingding nito.

Right away, his lips crashed against mine. His kisses were brutal and burning. His tongue hungrily slid into my mouth. I couldn't feel any warmth from it. I felt like he was punishing me.

"Is this what you want?" His teeth gritted against my lips. His hands started to wander around my body, touching me in intimate places. His hands were callous where it had once been kind and gentle. This was not like anything I had experience with him. Mariin kong pinikit ang mga mata ko ng bumaba ang halik niya sa leeg ko at nagpatuloy siya sa marahas na paghawak sa katawan ko.

I felt his fingers going under my skirt, trailing along the inside of my leg. I took in a sharp inhale when he cupped my sex. He pushed my underwear aside and touched my bare flesh with his finger. Without a warning, he thrust his finger inside me. I didn't want to but tears just began to sting my eyes. He rammed his finger in and out of me while he sucked and kissed my neck.

"Wayne, nasasaktan na ako..." Hindi ko na napigilan ang mga luha ko. I was still dry down there and it felt really uncomfortable. I cried not because of that but because of the way he was treating me.

Ito ang pangalawang beses na naramdaman kong nabastos niya ako. The first one was ten years ago inside his car and now this... With the way he kissed and touched me, I felt like I was nothing more but a piece of meat.

Wayne stopped and looked at me. He cussed under his breath and took a step away from me.