HEY GUYS JON SWALLOWED A GIANT DUPLO BRICK AND THEN THE GODS LAUGHED

WAIT WHAT

nO

We swore we would never speak of that again

Speak of what, Jonathan? The fact that you somehow managed to swallow a Duplo block the size of your fist?

What the Hades Nate! I thought we were friends!

That night, there was a huge storm, remember?

...yeah?

Well, I distinctly remember hearing laughter in the thunder.

Even the gods mocked you.

Right, Jon?

I have nothing to say on the matter

THAT WASN'T A DENIAL

I... Um...

Oh, but we're forgetting the second part of that story, that happened a day later, aren't we?

YOU WOULDN'T

I WOULD

Will you tell them, or shall I?

I suppose it'll be more dignified if I explain...

So Jon decided to tell me that the Duplo was tasty, and edible.

Please bear in mind I was young and impressionable.

Anyway, I tried swallowing a block like he did.

I remember distinctly it was a yellow 2x2

Get on with the story

Fine.

Wait, hang on. Are you sure you want me to tell everyone what you did?

Oh shoot, fair point.

Nuh-uh. No backing out now. Don't start what you can't finish.

NO. IF YOU SPEAK, YOU'RE TAKING ME WITH YOU AND I SURE AS HADES AIN'T GOING DOWN WITH THE SHIP

:3

Long story short, he was my first kiss

NO NO, DON'T PUT IT LIKE THAT YOU MORON

THAT WAS MOUTH-TO-MOUTH, NOT A KISS

You had J2O that day, didn't you? I could tell ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

I.... uHm

He was so bad at the Heimlich that I passed out.

And he legit spent three minutes straight doing mouth-to-mouth before realising it was a good idea to get an ambulance or even some sort of actual trained person.

I panicked, OKAY?! My bro was passed out on the floor....

...

...

*awkward silence*

So... What is this blog supposed to be about?

Oh I set this one aside as an experiment.

The plan was to reveal one small embarrassing secret and see how far it escalated.

I think it went quite well, if I do say so myself.

You-

You...

You PLANNED this?

Mayhaps :3

I am so disappointed in you right now.