"Ready for our daily dose of torture?" Evangeline asked as we walked to the pack house.

She was wearing a navy and white striped cotton dress that she had stolen from my closet. I didn't care though, I had grown close to the little red head who was conveniently the same size as me.

Her skin was a little more tan and her legs looked stronger. I could even hear her blood hum today. It sounded like the faint sound of bees in the breeze. She was getting stronger. Much stronger.

We had gone on a long run this morning and were headed to the pack house to help Miranda get things ready for the council meeting. Apparently, there was still a lot to do, and we were running out of time to do it.

"It won't be that bad, besides, we have each other. Which means we can just steal a bunch of snacks and bitch the whole time," I said while nudging her shoulder playfully.

She threw an arm around my shoulder as she laughed. "Have I ever told you that you're my favorite?"

I shrugged. "Not today, but please, tell me how wonderful I am?" I said dramatically while flailing my arm over my forehead.

"Oh my God Char," she laughed as we continued to walk.

The pack house was busy. Omegas and gammas were buzzing around; cleaning, cooking, mowing, and rearranging for the upcoming events.

Miranda was in the middle of the living room chatting with an older lady when she saw us walk in. She waved with a small smile which just made Evangeline groan.

"Morning," I called out to her.

"Morning girls, thank God you're here."

"What do we need to do?" Evangeline asked as politely as she could.

"Well, we need right now to figure out what's in the attic. I need to know how many tables, chairs, tablecloths, and things like that are up there as well as if the party tent is still there. If not I need to order one soon."

Evangeline groaned over our link. The attic was dusty and hot, especially in the summer. The only upside was that it would just be Evangeline and I, meaning we could bullshit around as much as we wanted.

"Morning girls," Thomas called out as he walked down the stairs with a coffee cup in his hand.

"Morning Thomas," Evangeline answered with a smile.

Thomas walked to Miranda and gave her a quick kiss before he turned back to us. "So, what are you girls up to?"

"They are going to go check out the attic to see what's up there for the party on the last day," Miranda quickly answered for us. "What about you dear? How's work?"

Thomas groaned and looked into his empty coffee cup. "We have so much to do, Ethan and I are drowning in all the damn paperwork." He looked at Evangeline and I for a moment then back to Miranda with softer puppy dog eyes. "You know, it would be a huge help to me if I could steel the girls today."

"What? But Thomas we need to figure out what we have in the attic so I know how much to order," she retorted back firmly.

Thomas slid a hand around her waist and smiled. "Baby, just call some of the staff around here. They are going to know more about what's up there than these two will. Besides, last year Evangeline helped me with all the documents for the meeting itself and this year since we are hosting I am in charge of setting the agenda and getting all the documents that go with it together. Remember, they had all those binders to pass out to everyone? We are in charge of doing that. Anyways Evangeline was a huge help, and I would definitely not mind borrowing her again." He let out a sigh and looked over at Evangeline a little pleadingly. "Would you mind Evangeline? It would be a huge help."

"Course Thomas. It wasn't so bad last year with the two of us on it together," Evangeline said with a smile of relief that made me bite back a laugh.

"Thank you," he replied gratefully.

"And what about Charlotte?" Miranda asked pointedly.

"Well, Ethan is about to pull his fangs out from all the paperwork for the visitors coming in. I have him coordinating their stays, all the safety bullshit. Anyways it would be good for Charlotte. She's going to be the beta female soon and she'll have to help Ethan with these kinds of thing anyways."

Miranda looked at him for a pregnant moment then nodded with a sigh. Thomas smiled then stepped back a little and winked at Evangeline and I. "Alright, Char he's in his office upstairs. Evangeline, why don't you and I find me some coffee first and raid the refrigerator?"

Evangeline smiled and turned to walk with Thomas who seemed like his only mission in life was to refill his coffee cup. I nodded to Miranda, who started writing things down on a clipboard hurriedly before making my way to the stairs.

Ethan's office wasn't hard to find. First off, there were not that many offices up here, but secondly, all I had to do was follow the smell of his scent. His scent that called to me. It was like water surrounding me as it rolled over my skin and made me flush.

The pull lit up a little. Dammit, it was getting harder. I sighed. I wasn't sure what to do. I hadn't really had time to think about what Andrea or Levi said, but I knew I needed to fast.

I twisted the handle to the wooden door and slowly opened it, letting the scent that was all him, all male, and singing to me bathe me as I stepped into his office. He looked up from his laptop with a mix of surprise and amusement. "I would say I am surprised, but I could smell you coming from like a mile away," he said with a coy smile as he got up from his large wooden desk and walked to me.

I put my hands on my hips and raised my brows. "Is that supposed to be romantic?"

He shrugged innocently as he slid his arms through mine so he could pull me into him. "What do you think sunshine?"

I thought to myself dramatically then turned back to him as a playful smile tugged at my lips. "I think you can do better Everett."

I pulled away quickly then started to take in his office as I slowly walked towards the chairs sitting in front of his desk. Like Thomas, he had a window that overlooked the valley. It took up a good portion of the wall; it was beautiful, almost calming.

There was a green velvet wingback chair sitting in the corner of the window with a small side table next to it that held a stone-like coaster. He had bookshelves lining the back of his office with everything from the classics to modern thrillers, murder mysteries, and other books that looked older with probably hundreds of stories to tell.

His desk wasn't messy, but it wasn't neat. A half-drunken cup of coffee sat next to his laptop where a desk lamp shone a light that highlighted some cup stains on his desk. He had sticky notes everywhere, which made me smile a little to myself. There were words on them that meant nothing to me, yet reading them was hysterical; things like 'big rock' or 'slasher' or 'ass wipe,' which were all placed perfectly on the rim of the lampshade.

"So sunshine, to what do I owe the pleasure?" He asked as he started to walk towards me with his lips pulling into a teasing smile.

I sighed. I felt the guilt from keeping the tree from him stir in me followed by my mixed emotions over the rogues. His doubt. I couldn't forget how it looked in his eyes, I know what I saw.

I sighed and looked back up with a small smile. "Well, Thomas said that you both are drowning in paperwork–"

"No shit," he muttered out as he walked to his rolly desk chair and collapsed into it. His eyes were tired. He had been up late, the faint redness of his eyes was evidence of that.

I couldn't help but think about the young version of him, of how he felt. Even now I could feel a current coming off of him, but in the memory, it was more alive. It was like, well, like his mother said. It was white hot like fire.

"Anyways," I said as I started to walk around to him. "Thomas recruited Evangeline and I to help you two. More like he saved us from Miranda that wanted us up in the attic."

Ethan groaned. "Good, that place is like the version of Narnia where someone sucked all the fun and airflow out."

I laughed with him as I leaned back against his desk in front of him and nodded. "Ya, Evangeline and I are not fans." I let out a few more breathy laughs before looking back at him. "Anyways, Thomas figured I should help you since I apparently will have to be doing these kinds of joyous tasks soon enough."

"Well," Ethan mused for a bit while he stood up. He took a step towards me and put a hand on either side of me. I shivered slightly at his closeness as the pull seemed to slowly simmer between us. "Since you're here it could be joyous."

I smiled then looked down at my toes. The guilt tugged at me. Dammit, I should have asked him to come with me last night. He should know what I saw. I don't know if it's useful yet, but still, I saw his mother.

"Sunshine, what's wrong? I can sense it, tell me."

I sighed and looked back up into his blue-green eyes that reminded me of hers while she cut the crust off the sandwich she was making. I want to tell him, in that moment I wanted to, but I didn't know how. I felt my doubts that were stirred by his doubts, but the rogues creep up. God, doubt ruins everything like a damn disease. I hated it.

I also wasn't sure if telling him now was the best idea. I didn't know how Ethan would take all of it. I thought a bit as I bit my lip and decided that I should tell him later when we were somewhere that I felt a little safer.

"It's just," I sighed out as he rubbed my arm gently. Leaving small lines of flames as he did. "I just, the rogues. It's just eating at me still, I can't shake it."

He sighed and nodded. "I know. Ryder is out again today, so hopefully we'll know something."

I still felt uneasy. My wolf pushed me. She wanted me to just spill my guts, but considering how Ethan felt about his family and the whispers, I wasn't sure if doing this here in his office was the best idea.

I felt his fingers tilt my chin up. The bond swirled. It pulles harder, but I liked it.

"Sunshine," he said while his thumb traced my bottom lip. "You know I won't let anything happen to you right? You, Evan, and Evangeline are the only things I care about in this life."

"You care about the pack too," I breathed out, because I knew it was true. He cared deeply about the pack whether he wanted to admit it or not.

He sighed as his fingers trailed the edge of my jaw. The pull was hungry. It was licking its lips as it's belly growled loudly with hunger. It wanted to be fed, and I was having a hard time trying not to.

"Not as much as I care about you," he murmured as he leaned closer to me.

His lips barely grazed mine when the door opened. "I see you two are making a real dent in that paperwork?" Thomas said with an amused tone from behind me.

I buried my face in Ethan's chest while he chuckled. "Sorry Thomas, we'll get through it eventually."

"Key word there, 'eventually'," he said teasingly which made Ethan roll his eyes. "Alright, check back in when you actually made a dent in it."

Thomas closed the door and my lungs let out the breath of relief they were holding. Ethan sighed then looked down at me and laughed to himself.

I leaned back against the desk and looked over at the many stacks of papers he had piled on a white plastic table sitting against the wall next to his desk. "I guess we should get to work?"

I turned back to hear his answer but only got his lips. His lips that made the pull strain harder for more. His lips that seemed to take my breath away as they lit a fire that spread wildly over my body. His lips that I knew I would happily drowned in if I could.

Damn the pull.

I kissed him back as the need grew. I was hungrier; thirsty for something that felt like I would always be quenching. He groaned a little and pushed me back into the desk as I snaked my fingers through his hair. It had to be one of my favorite feelings in the world.

He groaned again and ran his hands down the curves of my waist before he tightened his hold on me and picked me up so he could sit me on top of his desk. I squealed a little when my butt hit the wood. I was wearing a navy cotton knee length dress, much like Evangeline's. A knee length dress, that did not feel so knee length as he started to rub his hands up the sides of my thighs before he brought them back down to my knees; he hooked his hands around my knees and pulled me closer to him, causing me to gasp when my chest hit his.

I wrapped my legs around him and pulled him closer to me, I needed him closer to me. In that moment I felt like he was the waves and I was the beach that he was crashing into. His scent and the energy pouring off of him was addicting. I could smell him, smell his arousal, and smell his blood start to sizzle. It was like some set a slow burning fire to his veins. It was warm and it called to me, it begged me to sink my fangs into a spot close to his neck and taste it.

I felt him tug on my bottom lip and moaned a little into his mouth as he used that as an opportunity to snake his tongue in between my lips. God, I had no idea how one man could taste so damn delicious.

He slipped his hands under my dress and was at first moving his hands cautiously against the sides of my thighs, testing the waters as he waded in. But I was tired of waiting, the pull was too much and I need more of him. I squeeze my legs around him a little tighter and pulled him to me so his pelvis ground against mine which made him let out a low rumble that vibrated over the desk.

It was then that something snapped. His blood was like fire and his scent in itself was enough to get me high as a damn kite. His lips moved more aggressively with more demand over mine as his hands held back nothing.

He pulled me closer to him and cupped my ass in his hands. I let out a gasp as he squeezed before he worked his way up the rest of my body. His fingers danced along the skin of my back before one of his hands decided to explore the side of my ribcage; it felt like feathers of electricity were grazing over them. It was delicious, delightful, and dangerous.

I tugged at his shirt some more. It was too much. It was all too much. Everything felt hot all the sudden; my clothes, his clothes, the room. I wanted them gone.

He chuckled into his kiss as he pulled his shirt off then went back to devouring me while I let my hands run up and down his chest approvingly. I wrapped one around around his back and let my fingers trace all the plains of it, memorizing it like I would a map. My other hand moved down his torso slowly, I wanted to know what every line of him–every inch, felt like. I reached the top of his jeans where the trail of hair at his navel disappeared and felt my chest rumble as he traced my bottom lip with his tongue. I tugged at his belt buckle playfully, which made him growl deeply into his kiss.

He had been playing with the edge of my bra, but soon, his hand slipped underneath it and cupped my breast. I let out a hot breath between our kisses, then felt a tiny moan escape my lips followed by vibrations from my chest as he kneaded it in his hands. He let his fingers trace every line of it; slowly, tantalizingly, and almost in a tortuous way that made me kiss him harder for more.

The pull was on fire.

We were like a gas fire that someone was slowly letting more and more and more gas into. He moved to my other breast but only for a short moment. Before I knew it, he was tugging my dress off and discarding it somewhere before he picked me up and laid me gently on the floor behind his desk.

I felt my beast growl in approval as he climbed over me and crashed his lips back into mine. He ground against me, rubbing his hardness against my core which made my veins hum louder.

The pull cried out for more and I was too drunk on him to even comprehend reason.

Soon my bra was off and his hands were memorizing every line, every curve, every inch of my bare breasts. I felt my back arch as pleasure washed through me when tugged on one of my nipples playfully.

He his chest vibrated a bit harder and rocked through me. He kissed me hard again then broke away, leaving me breathless as he kissed his was down my chest before he took a whole nipple in his mouth. I closed my eyes as I relished in the feel of him sucking, and biting, and kissing, and flicking, and trailing his tongue in ways that made my head spin as euphoric waves rushed across my skin; fingers through his hair clutching at him as his licks stirred up a euphoric storm in me.

His blood was humming louder. I could feel it. It was like his blood reached out to mine and was caressing it with electric currents that bursts like little fireworks. It was hot like fire, a fire that licked at my skin and tantalized it in the most delicious way.

He released my nipple then kissed the top of my breast before moving back to my mouth where he kissed me slowly. He moved his lips over mine like he was trying to memorize them, capture every bit of them.

He kissed the side of my jaw then moved to my ear where he playfully tugged on it with his teeth, drawing a soft groan of approval from my lips. His hand was slowly working its way down to my belly, to a place that felt like it was a warm puddle and almost aching with need.

The pull yelled out.

It yanked hard at us. It almost took my breath away. I felt Ethan kiss the shell of my ear again before he trailed his lips along my jaw. His eyes flickered to my neck, they held a battle that he looked like he was losing.

I didn't know what to do. I froze. I froze because in that moment while physically I knew was the pull was demanding and what my body was demanding, I just felt like I couldn't do it. I couldn't take the final plunge.

It made my body still and old pains laugh out at me. I didn't know what to do, I wasn't sure how to even manage the situation.

"Ethan?" I breathed out.

His eyes still looked at my neck longingly. I felt my chest tighten. I knew it was hard, too hard. He let out a long breath and closed his eyes. I could feel his beast, he was close, as was mine.

Mine was barking loudly in the back of my mind, she wanted her mate. She wanted me to let him have us right there in his office. I pushed her back hard. I wasn't ready. At least I thought I wasn't ready. The damn pull made it hard to focus or think about anything.

He opened his eyes and looked back at his neck, and in a split moment, I could have sworn I saw a flash of disappointment in his eyes. That's when I felt it. The guilt. I felt it and I hated the pull for it.

"Sunshine don't," he murmured against my cheek. He reached over and grabbed my bra, pulling it open so I could slide my arms into it; thank God for bralettes.

"Don't what?" I asked softly as he pulled the edges of my bra down. He kissed the space between my breasts the rest his chin a few inches above it.

He sighed and looked at me with wanton eyes. "Feel guilty, I can feel it." I leaned my head back and let out a labored breath. I looked back at him as he started to trace the skin on my right shoulder lightly with his fingers. "You don't need to feel that. It's not your fault."

"Yes, it is," I whispered out before I really even realized that I did.

"Sunshine," he sighed out. He was quiet for a few moments. Both of our breaths were starting to settle but my skin still felt balmy, hot with desire as he let his fingers trace the edge of my bra strap. "When we do this, when I do mark you," he said while trailing his fingers longingly over an area of skin between my shoulder and my neck, "I don't want you to hesitate. If we're going to do this, then we are going to do it without reservation."

I let out a long sigh and looked down at him. I could see his beast behind his eyes. He was confused. He was confused as to why his mate kept denying him. The sight in itself was enough to make my wolf whine in the back of my mind. She was more than frustrated with me.

Maybe I was being stupid? Maybe I should let Ethan mark me? Or maybe I still needed to wait? He was right in a way, when we eventually do that I don't want to feel the panic I had felt before.

"Ok," I replied softly. I didn't know what else to say.

I started to run my fingers through his hair, playing with it while we laid quietly together. I don't think either of us knew what to say, but the silence spoke loudly enough.

I sighed and looked back at him. He had his eyes closed and was barely vibrating with a purr of contentment. I felt bad, he looked so calm and content in that moment. His face was so relaxed, it reminded me of the younger version I saw in the memory.

"Should we actually do paperwork?"

Ethan's lips tugged into a smile. "I think that the paperwork can wait. I need a cold shower." I felt a blush rush to my cheeks as he chuckled then kissed the skin his face had been laying on. "Your skin tastes like honey and vanilla by the way."

I cocked my brow as he fluttered his eyes open. "Is that what I smell like to you?"

His lip twitched deviously. "A little."

"Care to share?"

He shook his head teasingly. "Maybe one-day sunshine."

I huffed again which only made him vibrate with soft laughter. We laid on the floor in his office for a bit longer before we both decided that we needed to get up. I was reluctant to go, as was he, but I was pretty confident that if I stayed that the pull would have gotten the best of me. I promised him I would let him see me later as I trotted out of his office. Evangeline passed me in the hallway with a knowing smile which only made me walk faster to get out of the pack house.

When I got home, Derek was already fixing a late lunch. BLT's were being made while Elliot typed away furiously on his laptop. He looked at me with a kind smile as slapped a piece of bread on top of his sandwich. "Miss me little one?"

I trotted to him and let him pull me into a warm hug. "Of course, how was Leo?"

He sighed and pulled away right as Elliot shut his laptop. "Good. He also says hello. He mentioned maybe after you're more settled that you and Ethan could come to visit him. I think you would like him."

I slid onto a barstool as Elliot walked up next to me and kissed my hair. I nodded as Elliot winked at me. "That would be fun, tell him I would love that."

"So Char, why don't you tell us why you and Evan were sneaking around the other night," Elliot asked deviously as Derek placed sandwiches on a plate with a generous portion of some potato chips.

I sighed and tugged at my hair as Derek sat a plate in front of me. "Thanks Derek," I said before leaning back and looking at them both warily. "Alright, but promise me you won't think I'm crazy?"

Derek nodded firmly as he handed a plate to Elliot. "Course Char, go on."

I proceeded to recount to them about the whispers, the tree, and the rogues. To say they were disturbed was an understatement. Elliot was almost on Levi's level of angry and I don't blame him.

Derek sat back on his barstool and let out a long breath before meeting Elliot's worried gaze. "What do you think babe?"

Elliot swallowed some of his sandwich then wiped his mouth. "I think you need to call Leo. Alex has a progeny that's a dream walker, remember? I don't know if what's happening to Char is the same, but it feels like that. Maybe Alex can help?"

Derek nodded as he thought a bit to himself. "Yes, Barrett and his mate I think are in China right now, but I think that's a good idea."

"Hold up, who's Alex? And dream walking? What? Also, I don't know, I mean, is it a good idea to start spreading this around the other vamps?"

Derek smiled a little into his glass. "Alex is Leo's brother, he's another ancient. Dream walking is when someone literally can penetrate your mind when you're dreaming. Sometimes the powerful ones can do it while you're awake and walk around in your memories, like Barrett."

"Holy shit," I gasped out. "Can you two do things like that? Is that normal?"

Elliot chuckled and shook his head. "No, Derek and I are about as normal as it get's for vampires. Some, mostly the ancients or their first progenies can. Leo can do a number of party tricks, but Alex's progenies are pretty gifted."

"And to answer your last question, I think it would be fine. If I ask Leo and Alex to keep it quiet, they will. They are really close and I know Barrett wouldn't say anything if we asked him not to."

I sighed and nodded. "Ok, well tell them thank you."

Derek nodded while Elliot started to pick at his chips. "So, what do Levi and Ethan think of all this?"

I bit my lip then let out a stressed breath. "They don't know."

"Char," Derek scolded me gently. "Char, you can't hide this from them, especially Levi. He needs to know, you know that."

I nodded. "I know, it's just. I don't know Derek, I saw Eve. I saw that day. I guess I'm a little nervous considering how he feels about it all. That and I don't know, I'm not sure if we're ready for how he will respond."

Elliot leaned on the table and looked to me with a thoughtful nod. "I get it. It's not a pleasant memory for any of us. Tell him, but maybe tell Lander first. That way Lander can keep Levi calm. We don't need him marching down here if we don't know what it is."

"Agreed," Derek said. "So what about Ethan?"

I groaned and picked at my chips. "I wanted to tell him today but I couldn't. I just–" I sighed and looked back at Derek's soft knowing eyes. "After the rogue thing, I guess I don't know, it's just eating me up. It's the doubt I know I saw in his eyes.

"I saw him today. I was supposed to help him with paperwork. I was going to tell him and I don't know, I just couldn't."

"What do you mean you were supposed to help him with paperwork?" Elliot asked with a sly grin.

I flushed a little which made both of them start to laugh. I groaned and looked through my fingers as Derek was trying hard not to laugh. "Ok, well we got a little carried away!Geez!"

"He's your mate, no need to apologize," Elliot replied as he wiggled his eyebrows suggestively.

I groaned which only made him laugh harder. Derek took a long sip of his water then looked back at me. "Char, first off I don't blame you, but he is your mate and this isn't just a little secret. You need to talk to him before it turns into something more."

I sighed and nodded. "I'm seeing him tonight. I'll talk to him then. I just, I wish he would do more about the rogues," I grumbled.

Derek bit his lip and looked at Elliot then back at me. "I don't think he didn't believe you, Char. I think he did. I think what you saw was more fear than doubt that day."

"What do you mean?" I asked curiously as I bit into my sandwich.

Derek looked back at Elliot who nodded to him. "Let me ask you this, what is in Ethan's veins?"

I swallowed and cocked my brow. "Blood?"

Derek rolled his eyes. "Yes, but what type of blood."

"Alpha blood? His parents were both alphas right?"

Derek nodded. "That's right. Now, what is in Evan and Evangeline's veins?"

"Alpha blood," I replied curiously.

"Funny that three wolves with strong blood like that behave almost as if it's dormant, don't you think?" Elliot added.

I sat back a bit as a light bulb flickered on. That's what it was. That's why I always felt like they were holding back. It was dormant, the power in their veins; but why? How was it not humming like mine?

"That doesn't make sense, I mean, they are strong? How is it not–"

"Like yours and Levis?" Derek finished. I nodded to him as my wolf stirred a little. "Why do you think your blood is strong Char?"

I sighed and thought for a bit while I chewed on a bite of my sandwich. "Well, besides the fact that I have Levi's running through me, I mean, Levi pushed the hell out of me. Like that day I almost shifted, God I was so damn mad at him."

Derek chuckled a little and nodded. "Why do you think Levi pushed you as much as he did?"

"Because it made me push back," I thought out loud. "It made me pushed back harder."

"It made you reach into a place and ignite it," Elliot added.

I flickered my eyes to Derek and cocked my head a bit. "So are you saying that they just haven't been pushed?"

Derek rocked his head side to side as he thought. "They are getting stronger, anyone can see that. Little Evangeline has come a long way, Elliot said she actually tied with him the other day–"

"Really?!" I interjected as I snapped my head to Elliot.

He nodded with an amused smirk. "She's getting fast, like her mother."

"Evan has a hum to him that I haven't heard in his veins for a long time," Derek thought out loud. "And Ethan, well, Ethan's veins are starting to hum with something that I think scares him."

"Why? Why do you think that is?"

A small smile tugged at Derek's lips. "Because, little one, that means shaking things up. It means reaching into the past so he can take hold of his future, but mostly it means he needs to take a leap of faith, much like you did when you were starting out with Levi.

"When you came to us you were not the wolf you are now, you know that. You were afraid, afraid of yourself, of the future, and of what you could do; but you worked through that because Levi pushed you to do it. It was either do it or die with him, and Levi wasn't about to let you fail. It's why you're strong Char. Levi made you fight hard to work through the shift, then fight even harder to accept what you are and embrace it.

"Ethan looks like he's going through a lot of the same things, he, just like you did, still has fear in his heart. The worst kind of fear is knowing what the right thing to do is. It creates a dread in your belly and eats you up until you decided to pony up and pull the trigger. I think Ethan knows what the right thing to do is here, he just is at a crossroads right now."

"So what does that mean?"

"It means he needs to be pushed little one," Derek replied with a knowing smile.

"So what do I do?" I sat back while my brain was trying to process everything.

"It means you need to keep pushing him."