"We are products of our past, but we don't have to be prisoners of it." ― Rick Warren

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NIKKI POV

Penthouse, Grand Sylvio Hotel

Colton reached my hand and look at me intently. "I really like you, Nicki," he confesses earnestly squeezing my hands lightly.

I was surprised. I didn't see it coming. I just met him yesterday. How could he be so sure to like a girl which he just met merely two days ago? He looks fine I can't deny that fact. He's good looking. He had a good job and he seems a like a nice and trusted guy, but who knows right? I just met him.

"You're kidding right?" I chuckled trying to make it lighter. He was staring at me seriously and I knew he is dead-serious while he held my hand with no plans of releasing it.

"I do like you and I wanted to know you more. Will you let me, Nicki?" he exclaimed in a dead-serious tone, with his eyes trained on me. I just nod unable to say any word as I tried to pry my hand from his hold. I can see some girls trying to get his attention.

I look at him and I thought, why not? It doesn't hurt to try. He seems like a good guy.

"Fine. Can you then release my hand so I can drink my wine?" I chuckled half-heartedly.

He chuckled when he realized he was still holding my hand and release it instantly as he apologized. I saw his cheeks reddened slightly and my eyebrow cocked in amusement. I kept the amusement in my head not wanting to embarrass him more.

As the time ticks, I realized he was funny and he knows how to make a conversation light and funny. We were both too animatedly talking and laughing that I didn't notice a pair of gray eyes watching not far from our table. Staring at our hands intertwined.

*****

ALEX POV

I was about to pay our bill since Mr. Valiente already left without even finishing his food, he had an emergency call to attend. He just signed the documents and agreed with the solutions being implemented in his company when I saw Colton and Nicki. Colton was holding her hands and they look so oblivious around them. Their two eyes were locked. I froze for a second, and I felt a kick in my heart. How I wished it was me who was holding her hands like that, staring at her beautiful strange eyes.

I was too lost in my thoughts that I didn't realize I was gripping the debit machine unconsciously, forgetting about the waiter who was standing next to me, politely waiting for me to complete the transaction.

"I'm sorry," I apologized and completed the payment. As soon as I paid I left the place right away and drove like crazy back to my penthouse. I need a hard drink. I need something to numb this awful, hollow in my heart.

As soon as I got in, I tossed my suitcase onto the armchair and walked to my bar and grab a whiskey and downed it directly to my mouth. A bursting burning sensation slithered down my throat through my stomach. The burning feeling is incomparable with the feelings I felt at the moment. I didn't realize a stray tear escape my eyes when I tasted that damn lone tear. I kept chugging the bitter liquid, but the taste soon blended with the bitterness and rawness I felt. The alcohol soon kicks in my system, my vision starting to get a little blurry, things starting to move even in my motionless state.

I ignored it and walk to the couch with the bottled of whiskey in my hand.

I place the whiskey on the coffee table when I heard a knock on my door. Swaying to the door, I managed to reach it and opened. My mom was standing there, looking surprised to see me with my tie loosened, hanging around my neck and obviously, I look like a lost fool man.

"What are you doing, Alex? Killing yourself?" mom chided as she walks me back to the couch.

"I wish this could kill me, mom," I chuckled humorlessly, bitterness crawled through my chest. I felt empty. She helps me until I settled back on the couch then she occupied the spot beside me. When I tried to reach the whiskey she grabs it away before I could even reach it.

"What happened, son?" she asked calmly. I could see the sadness in her eyes. I stared at my mom and that longing to feel her love, her warm hug, and her motherly words rush to me like a big bang. I just wish I didn't witness her infidelity. I just wish everything were the same.

I don't know if it's the alcohol that made me confess to her, or because I longed for my mother. I tried to avoid talking to her about my personal life, but at that moment, I felt like I'm very weak. I just found myself confessing.

"I met the daughter of Juan Antonio Rivas!" I started and she squirmed as she looks at me warily.

"Nicki?" she mumbled, sucking in her breath. She looks surprised.

I nod in agreement.

"At first, I thought she's just a plain nerdy girl, but I found myself falling on her because she's the only girl in the school who never showed weakness in front of me. She was the only one that is immune to me. Then, we dated. I thought of avenging dad by using her, but then when I kissed her everything was forgotten. I just realized, I want her, and never I so desperately want something in my life. She became my girl. I don't know how it happened but we just found ourselves together. Then she found out about avenging dad and she left me, mom. It was like hell. I thought I'm invincible," I cried. Mom reached for me and hug me with her one hand rubbing my back in circles and for some reason, it gave a little comfort.

"Now, she's back but she love someone already!" I continued on, stifling the tears to streamed like a heavy rain though I felt so weak, vulnerable. I never outburst in front of anyone in my life. I guess mom has this thing to make you melt.

After a lengthy pause, mom spoke calmly while still caressing my back. I could feel her hugs tightened as I listened intently to her.

*****

HAILEY POV

I think it's time for him to know the truth. It's not fair for Nicki. I know, he's scarred and that didn't help him to trust anyone, to give in to love. He is still living in doubt against women and I know, it's my fault. I scarred him and it's hurting me to see him too vulnerable to love.

It took me by surprise his outburst. I never see this day to come, that he will confide and cry in front of me and because of a girl. I know Nicki is a nice girl.

I was brushing his back in circles as I recall how everything was wrong.

"..your dad came back after four years. That time I'm engaged to be married to Tony, or Antonio. Your dad found out and he came back. He called me and apologized for being rude to me four years ago. He apologized for being selfish that he didn't see the reason. He invited me to a dinner for the last time and patch up the ruined friendship he cause. And because I love him as my friend and brother, I agreed. Little did I know..." I paused and heaved a long hard sighed. I felt a lump in my throat. I summoned all my courage to spill it.

"..little did I know he planned to ruin my wedding. After that dinner, as we walked out the restaurant I felt my head heavy. I collapsed just as we reached his car and he brought me to his penthouse and ... " I paused again. Swallowing hard. My son sat straight and look at me waiting for my words. His eyes held so much curiosity and confusion.

"Promise me nothing will change. You still see him as the loving dad and yes he is. He is a nice man, and now I understand why he did it?" I asked in assurance before I spilled the word.

"He raped you Mom?" he asked with his voice full of disbelief. He was looking at me, sick and disgusted.

He looks flabbergasted, his jaw clenched and rooted.

I nod in agreement.

"Why did you just tell me this now, mom? I've been asking you this million times? Why?" he asked hysterically. Tears pooling his eyes while he's shaking his head in utter disbelief.

I thought I could stay cool and calm, but my unfazed pose withered and I felt the tears, uncontrolled, streamed down my cheeks.

"Looking at you now, I forgave him, though it's hard to forget what he did, but because of you, everything changed. I understand why he did that. He just loves me so much that his reason was blinded with jealousy and did the wrong thing that he could only think to have me. And the wrong was made it right by having you?" I cried though it still hurt me every time that the past crosses my mind, but fate has its own way to tossed two people together. I maybe was meant for him. I don't know how he crept into my heart, but I found myself falling for him unconsciously.

"I broke off the engagement. Tony left Spain and went back to the states and then focused himself in his business and heard nothing about him then. I decided to marry your dad when I found out I'm pregnant with you. Your dad live in agony and guilt. He was never happy, all he did was to make me happy to make up with the guilt that lives in his heart." I added. He was silent now. I don't know what he's thinking. I just hope he will find in his heart that forgiveness for his father.

I made a short pause, sighing momentarily. "Then when you were born, we are so happy. Your dad was the happiest. He adored you and did everything to give you whatever you want. Then when you turned five, I saw Tony again in a charity ball where he was with his wife. The love we thought was gone came back and we decided to see each other discreetly," I continued.

"When you saw us kissing that was a goodbye kiss. We just decided to cut everything and tried to forget everything slowly, because every happiness we felt, we are also inflicting deep wounds to you, to Nicki, Gail, and your dad. It was the best decision we made. I learned to love your dad and him to Gail, but he lost Gail before he could start." I felt that guilty feeling again. I may have asked for Gail's forgiveness but still I feel guilty every time I think about it.

He was silent after I told him everything. He seems lost in his thoughts.

"Please don't hate your dad, sweetheart!" I beg.

"But why didn't you tell me this before, mom? Why did you have to wait for this long?" he asked with his soft voice.

"Because I don't want to tarnished everything that you and your dad shared. You look highly of him and I don't wanna ruin it," I explained solemnly.

"I don't know how I felt after knowing it all, mom to be honest," he replied bitterly as he leaned his back on the couch.

"Just forget everything I said sweetheart and start a new. Just don't make any aggressive decisions that would hurt anyone. Think about the consequences so you won't repeat our mistake." I advised as I run my hands over his cheeks.

"Why are you here, by the way, mom?" he asked suddenly.

"Oh, I left you a message and you didn't call back so I decided to drop by," I replied casually. "Your dad and I are going to celebrate our 28th wedding anniversary."

We decided to celebrate it as a start over on our relationship. For the past years since my son left for London, our relationship has become sweeter. I don't know how it happened but I found myself loving him already.

*****

ALEX POV

"When?" I asked nonchalantly, still reeling with the revelations I just grasped.

"In a months time. I also invited your two friends Richard and Colton!" Mom smiled and stood up.

"I gotta go. Your dad must have been worried about me now. I hope to see you there, honey!" mom playfully widened her eyes, then she leaned forward and she kissed my cheeks.

I stood up and followed her to my door. "Have a good rest son, you look like a hell," mom remarked and left. I closed the door and decided to have a shower and sleep.

I still can't believe what my mom just revealed to me. Now, I felt the regret of even thinking to revenge on the poor old man. I will help the Rivas get's back on its feet and take the money I have paid from its profit and when it's running well I will hand it over to him.

It will be hard for me to forget her but I will.

He doesn't deserve me. He deserves better. I felt that pain again. It easy to say but it's hard to do, but mom is right. I don't wanna repeat that mistake again. I know she loves Michael and I won't be a hindrance to them. I guess it's time to make things right.

*****

NIKKI POV

After our dinner, Colton helps me buy some food to stock in my fridge from a nearby store before he drove me home. Paul called me to tell me to come and drop off my car. Not long he warned me that he just parked in the garage underground and he's coming to leave the keys before leaving.

Minutes later, I heard a knock on the door. I ran to open it and revealing Paul standing on my door frame with his hands resting in his pockets.

"Here's the key, Ms. Nicki," he said as he hands me the keys. "Have a goodnight, Ms. Rivas.," he said dismissively and turned on his heel leaving my place.

I shouted him thank you before he entered the elevator.

I put the keys on my coffee table and decided to have a shower and watch a little show before going to bed. I don't feel sleepy yet since I slept longer this morning.

I quickly had a shower and pulled out my favorite pink matching pajamas and didn't bother to dry my hair. I plopped down on the sofa bed and started flicking the channels. Then the show criminal minds went on. I like the show so I watched it until the end.

I was about to get up to my room and brushed my teeth when my phone suddenly rang.

I snatched the phone that was sitting on the coffee table and checks whose calling me at this time. It's almost eleven.

I saw Mara's name on the screen. I excitedly connected the call. "Mara!" I squealed cheerfully.

"Nicki!" she squealed back. In an instant, I felt like I was back to high school.

"How are you?" I asked exuberantly.

"Here, still feeling weird because of my pregnancy," she whined. I could see her pouting from here. I heard Nicolas voice soothing her. I felt so envious after.

"Oh, I'm sorry about that, but think about it, you're going to be a mother," I comforted.

"Yeah!" she replied excitedly. Her mood changed suddenly.

"I can't believe you and Nicolas ended up together," I exclaimed happily, still feeling incredulous.

"Yeah," she mused. "I never thought about it either," she chuckled.

"Hi, Nicki." I heard Nicolas voice in the background.

"Hi, Nicolas. Are you taking care of my friend very well?" I playfully asked grinning like a fool. Those two sounds so sweet on the other line. I could hear Mara giggled once in a while.

"Yeah. Although she's a handful sometimes, but I managed to give everything she wants," Nicolas gripe, but laughing.

"How come you never hang out with Alex anymore?" I blurted out without thinking. I bit my lip after when realization dawns on me. It's too late to stop.

Great Nicki. You're a party pooper!

The other line went silence for a bit then I heard a loud sighed.

"After you left Spain Nicki, Alex became worst. He shuts us off from his life and he goes to the bar most of the time. He manages to graduate but he was worst than the Alex we know. Then, we gave up convincing him to stop blaming himself, but he didn't listen. Well, he never listens to anyone, so we stop seeing him and because he never let us. I knew he's back five years ago, but I never made an attempt to call or approached him. The whole Spain knew him as the worst devil than his dad." Then he paused sighing momentarily.

"He'll call us if he wants to reconcile and hang out again with us," he explained bitterly.

"I'm sorry." I uttered softly. I wanted to smack myself for ruining the party. God, why am I so insensitive?

"You never told us what happened, Nicki?" Mara inquired cautiously trying to change the subject, I could hear them sucking their breath waiting for my reply.

"I found out that he was planning to get a revenge on my father and he was using me. I heard him and Annabel talking about it and he approved Annabel's accusation of avenging his father through me. That's why I decided to leave the next day." I explained hurtfully as I sniffed inaudibly, biting my bottom lip to stifle the sounds coming from my mouth. The tears stream down my cheeks non-stop. The pain was fresh and it felt just like yesterday.

"We are so sorry, Nicki," Mara exclaimed softly.

"I'm fine. It's over and I'm over him, a long time ago," I lied trying to sound casual and I thank God, my voice didn't crack or sounding throaty after all those tears.

"Why are you still awake at this hour, Mara? It's not healthy for you and the baby." I chided playfully trying to drop the subject as I tried to maintain my casual tone.

"Can I meet you then on the weekend or after your work?" Mara queried with hope.

"Sure!" I agreed excitedly. I missed her and I really wanna hang out with her. I shut them off with my life when I moved to the Philippines and I wanted to patch things up.

"I'll text you on the weekend," I promised. "You have to sleep now, mommy.." I snapped playfully which made her giggled.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah.. " she chanted as she agreed. I said my goodbyes to both of them and agreed to see each other on the weekend. I ended the call with a smile plastered on my face. I can't wait to see her.

I walk back to my room and brushed my teeth. My hair is already dry and soon I was crawling on my bed to retire for the night.

Not long I fall into sweet deep slumber.

*****

ALEX POV

I woke up today with buoyancy. After my talk with my Mom, I made my decision. I will fly to New York and work on that Engineering Firm and change the name too. I will be staying there for a month until Alana comes back. I need to be away from her if I want to start over and forget her.

Thinking about starting to run the Clinston Engineering firm made me ecstatic. It's been my dream.

I quickly walk to my washroom and started showering. I shave and brushed my teeth. After a lot of ceremonies, I got dressed. Not long I'm emerging out of my penthouse building with my suitcase in my hand. Rodrigo was standing in his usual spot. He opened the door for me.

I started calling people in New York for my arrival. I called my private pilot Clarence as well.

"Clarence I need you to prepare the plane, for tomorrow. I wanted to leave Barcelona tomorrow at exactly 6 PM if that's possible!" I ordered casually.

"It will be ready by then Mr. Morrison. Anytime for you, sir!" Clarence replied enthusiastically.

"Good. I'll see you then tomorrow." I said dismissively and ended the call.

Starting today, I'll start over...

*****

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