She Just Feels

Elizabeth's POV

I can't keep my eyes off him.

Adrian is completely at ease, maneuvering the sailboat as if he's done it a thousand times. And he probably has. The Gwendalyn is beautiful and obviously well loved, bright canvas sails fluttering in the breeze.

The ocean view may have been stunning, but my eyes stay fixed on the man who is turning my world upside down. He's changed into a pair of dark blue shorts and a white tank top, his tattooed biceps works of art. I silently scold myself, my imagination running wild with all the things I want him to do to me - with all the things I want to do to him.

Shit, I have it hard.

I should feel badly about being here before I've had a chance to break things off with Eric...but I don't. It's not as if I'm doing anything wrong, this was no different than being out with friends. As long as nothing happens...

Don't think about it!

Shutting my eyes, I lean my head back, breathing in the salty air. The ocean spray cools my skin as the warm sun caresses my face, making me sigh in content. I'm half tempted to let the soothing bob of the sailboat lull me to sleep.

"Enjoying yourself?" Adrian's deep voice asks from above me. My stomach tightens, my body instantly reacting to his husky tone.

Opening my eyes, I meet his gaze. He's standing over me with a smirk, silver eyes shining in the sunlight.

"I really love this," I admit, smiling up at him.

His eyes light up. "I'm glad."

Sitting forward on the bench seat I watch him move around gracefully, despite the constant rocking of sailboat. "It's bigger than I expected."

Glancing at me sideways he teases, "That's what they all say."

I blush, giving him a look. "That's not what I meant!"

Laughing, he makes an adjustment to the sails, tying off a piece of rope with quick movements. "I have a smaller boat, but I thought this would be less intimidating for your first time."

I flush. Who would have thought that such an aggressive looking male could be so thoughtful and sweet? "Why name her Gwendalyn?"

"It was my mother's name," he replies absently.

My heart warms and I can't help but want to know everything. I bite my lip, too nervous to ask the questions invading my mind. "It's a pretty name."

"Thanks. I think so too." Taking a deep breath, he groans, tugging off his shirt in one easy move and tossing it aside. "Fuck, that sun feels good."

I feel my face flush with heat.

His body, dear god. Hard ridges of muscle encased in olive skin. He has even more tattoos on his narrow hips and his left nipple is pierced, the tiny silver loop glinting in the sun. I shouldn't be surprised, but I was. And so incredibly turned on.

How could one man be so perfect, so wild, so fuckable? I want to touch him, taste him, lick every inch of him.

My hands clench in my lap, my knuckles turning white. He turns away from me to grab a beer out of the cooler, exposing the muscular expanse of his back. Across his shoulders is another tattoo, elegant black letters looping together.

"Nisi forte vivere," I whisper to myself. I know it's Latin and I regret not paying attention in school.

Turning back around Adrian knocks the cap off his beer on the side of the boat and takes a deep swallow. Catching my gaze, he looks at me expectantly. "Want one, babe?"

"No, thanks," I force out huskily.

His silver eyes gleam. "Maybe you want something else?"

Oh, god yes. I can't encourage him, not until I break things off with Eric. If I was going to do this I wanted no regrets, no guilt. "I'm still a little hung over from last night."

Reaching over he ruffles my hair. "You're a light weight."

"Am not," I scoff.

"Uh-huh." He leans down close, our noses nearly touching. "Just a little whiskey and you're giving me a strip tease and stroking your pretty clít in front of me."

I can't hide the embarrassment, hiding my face in my hands. "I can't believe I did that," I groan.

Gripping my wrists, he pulls my hands away from my face. "It was hot as hell, Ellie." Cupping my chin, he brushes his lips along my jaw, the stubble of his beard pricking my skin. "But if you ever tease me like that again I'll fuck you into oblivion."

"I'll k-keep that in m-mind," I stammer.

He backs off, eyes dark. "It's such a turn on when you stutter."

"It is?" How can he think that? I've had dates literally walk out on me because of it. Eric never failed to point it out, to correct me on it.

"Hell, yea. Dead giveaway I'm having an effect on you," he says roughly, walking away from me to take the helm. I'm left breathless, watching him steer through heavy eyes.

He's so confident.

I force my gaze downward, unable to take the sight of him. I have no right being with this man. Adrian is so far out of my league we weren't even on the same planet. What the hell am I doing here? Better yet, what is this man doing with me? Was I some sort of phase for him, an experience to tick off in his book?

Adrian isn't just attractive - he's intelligent, highly educated, and successful. He lived in the world of the elite. I closeted myself in an empty apartment in front of my laptop and wrote about experiences I'd never truly known. My life may have been unfulfilling, but I'd made peace that it was the best I would ever have. Now I'm being tempted to experience so much more by a man who set me on fire.

When you play with fire you're going to get burned.

"You alright?" Adrian's thick voice cuts into my thoughts.

I nearly jump, realizing that he's now standing in front of me, watching me closely. "I was just thinking."

Hunching down between my legs he reaches up, brushing a strand of hair from my eyes. "Hmm...and what were you thinking about so seriously?"

I can't tell him. I just can't. How could I even begin to voice the insecurities running rampant in my mind? And I don't want him to know. I don't want Adrian to ever know how below him I feel. "What does the tattoo on your back mean?"

He frowns, but doesn't push. "It's Latin for 'only the strong survive'."

"That's dark."

"I was in a dark place when I got it."

"Oh..."

"You can ask me if you want, Ellie." His tone is soft, but he looks like he's stealing himself to do battle. This is obviously a hard subject for him and I don't want to ruin such a perfect day by dredging up skeletons.

"You must really love her," I say, skirting the issue. "The boat I mean."

He relaxes slightly, letting out a slow breath. "She's my best girl."

I feel a tinge of jealousy - over a freaking sailboat! "Oh..."

Adrian gives me a suggestive look. "She's good to me, but she can't give me everything I need." His gaze slides over my body, dark and hungry.

The sharp stab of desire has me catching a breath. I stand up suddenly, gripping the side of the boat as it dips. "I s-should change," I rasp. It's hot as hell and my dress is beginning to stick to my skin.

He stands up slowly, eyes narrow. "You should."

"O-okay." I make my way carefully to the cabin, unaccustomed to the constant rocking below my feet.

Adrian's low voice stops me at the door. "Ellie?"

Gripping the doorjamb, I glance over my shoulder, my throat constricting at the intensity of his stare. No one has ever looked at me the way he does. "Yea?"

"Have you decided what you're going to do?"

I know he's referring to Eric. My eyes lock onto his. "Yes," I murmur.

"Good." He turns away from me, breaking me from his spell.

Shaking slightly, I go inside, shutting the cabin door. After undressing I dig out my bikini, suddenly nervous. I can't believe I'm going to wear this in front of Adrian. I swore never to wear this damn thing again. When Claire gave it as a birthday gift she insisted it was time I 'sexify' myself. She was sick of seeing me hunched over my laptop alone night after night.

My lips twitch, if only she could see me now.

Slipping on the bottoms I tighten and adjust the strings around my wide hips. Damn, it's even smaller than I remembered. Pulling the top over my heavy breasts I tug the skimpy fabric across my curves, twisting to make sure I'm fully covered. Nothing is left to the imagination, every flaw exposed, but I don't look as bad as I thought I would.

And what did it matter? Adrian's already seen me naked. The memories of what I did have my skin tinging pink. Pressing my hand against my stomach I try to will away the aching tension there.

A knock at the door makes me jump. "You good?" Adrian's muffled voice asks.

"Yea," I rasp, opening the door slowly.

Adrian is leaning against the doorjamb, waiting for me. As I step into the doorway his face hardens. "Jesus," he mutters, straightening.

Biting my lip, I twirl my finger nervously around the end of my braid, peeking up at him. "Does it look okay?"

He sucks in a breath, taking a step towards me. "So fucking coy. Do that again."

"What?" I croak.

His jaw visibly clenches. "Do. That. Again."

My lips part at the authority in his deep voice. His eyes are like fire on my skin, leaving nothing untouched. I take a step back unconsciously. Adrian follows, stalking me, forcing me to retreat further inside the cabin. My back hits the wall, my breath catching in my throat.

We're about to cross a line. The tension in the air is palatable, thick with lust. "The boat..."

"It's fine. I lowered the sails. There's no one around for miles." His hands come up, pressing against the wall, blocking me in. He leans down close, his voice hoarse. "Again, Elizabeth."

I can't deny him when he's looking at me with such hunger.

Fuck the line.

Tugging my braid, I gaze up at him from under my lashes, sucking my bottom lip between my teeth.

"Shit," he hisses, descending on me. My body responds on its own, my hands burying in his hair, pulling him down to my mouth. His kiss is slow and deep, his tongue tasting with languid strokes until I'm desperately tugging on his hair, needing more.

He gives me what I need, his hand dropping to my hip, stroking up my rib-cage. My back arches when he cups my breast. His fingers wrap around the fabric of my top, yanking it down. His lips leave mine, trailing down my neck and over the swell of my cleavage.

Rubbing his cheek against my nípple he groans, the rough stubble of his beard scraping the sensitive bud. "So perfect."

Wetness pools between my thighs. I pull him closer, pressing against his mouth. "Please."

"That's it. Beg me," he rumbles. His hand squeezes my breast, raising my nípple to his mouth. The first slow lick of his tongue has my body melting. My eyes slide shut, my head falling back against the wall. He does it again and again, until I'm throbbing and shaking. Whimpering, I tug hard on his hair, needing him to suck me and ease the ache. He gazes up at me, his eyes molten steel. "Does it hurt, babe?"

"Yes," I keen. "It hurts so much."

His eyes grow heavy, pupils blown. "Poor baby, you want me to kiss it better?"

I nod, desperate.

"Yea? What if I want to suck it instead?" he asks thickly. A soft sound escapes my throat. "You like that idea don't you? Can you imagine it, Ellie? My mouth sucking hard on your pretty nípples? I'd lick them over and over, bite them with my teeth."

"Adrian, please," I plead softly.

His face hardens, his gaze intense, burning me up. "You're going to rip my fucking world apart. I just know it," he snarls, his arm wrapping around my waist, hauling me tight against his hard body. His lips slam to mine, stealing the air from my lungs, before his mouth descends and locks over my aching nípple. He sucks hard, his tongue lashing. My hands grip his shoulders, nails digging into his skin. He groans in response, biting down.

"Yes!" I sob softly. I'm breathless, my empty body begging to be filled. I never imagined I could feel such need. To think I wasted so much of myself on a man who wouldn't even look at me sexually...

The thought of Eric has guilt twisting my stomach. This wasn't right. I still haven't broken things off with him. He may not have fulfilled me but Eric was a good man, he deserved better than to be cheated on.

Forcing myself back to earth I press my hands meekly against Adrian's shoulders. "Wait."

He makes a harsh sound in his chest, gripping my wrists and pinning my hands over my head. "No."

My desire skyrockets. "I haven't told Eric yet," I protest weakly.

"Screw him. I don't even want to hear his god damn name," he grates, spinning me around and slamming my front against the wall. We both moan as he presses his groin against my ass. His hands grip my hips painfully, his fingers tugging on the flimsy string of my bikini. I can't think. I can't breathe.

Why did I have to feel such guilt? Why did I have to fucking care at all?

"I don't want to regret this."

"Shit," he groans. Burying his nose in my hair he breathes deep, grinding his erection against my ass. "You're so sweet, Ellie." His voice hardens, vibrating along my skin. "But I'm not. I don't give two shits about your boyfriend or his god damn feelings." His hand slides down my stomach and inside my bikini. "I only care about you, baby. And you need to come like a man needs air." He doesn't wait for me to respond, his rough hand cupping my dripping pussy.

"Oh, god," I hiss. My pelvis rocks, rubbing myself against his palm. I nearly come, biting my lip hard to stop myself.

"So damn wet." His finger finds my clít, rubbing my swollen flesh with slow circles. His mouth is on my neck, licking, sucking, biting. My hands press flat against the wall, wild moans escaping my throat. "Does that feel good?"

"Yes," I whisper, my voice wrecked with need and guilt.

"Ah, Ellie, you're too fucking good for me," he murmurs huskily. "You're so damn perfect and I'm nothing but shit. I don't deserve someone as sweet as you." His words make my heart ache, the sweet pain filling my chest. My own insecurities were being voiced back to me. I want to tell him that it's not true - that I'm the one that doesn't deserve him - when his middle finger slips inside me to the knuckle.

"Oh, fuck!"

"Shh...just feel it," he breathes heavily in my ear. His finger stretches me, filling my empty and neglected flesh. God, it feels so good. So much better than anything I could ever give myself. With agonizing slowness he moves in and out, spreading my wetness. "You're so tight. How long has it been? Tell me."

My head drops forward, pressing my forehead against the wall. "Three years."

He stiffens behind me, breathing hard. "You trust me, Ellie?"

"Y-yes." With my fucking life.

"Good," he snarls. Then his hand is around my throat, lifting me up and hauling me back against him.

My feet nearly leave the floor, my breath coming in little gasps. His finger fucks inside me, finding my sweet spot and slamming over and over. I come so fast and hard my eyes roll back into my head, my legs thrashing.

"There it is," he groans, his teeth nipping my shoulder. His hand around my throat loosens, allowing in precious air. I gasp, my body limp against him as his finger works deep inside me. Dropping his hand from my neck he slaps my thigh. "Where's my 'thank you'?" he demands.

"Thank you!" I cry.

His lips trail up my jaw, his breathing harsh. "You're such a good girl." I shake my head. I'm not a good girl. What I'm doing is very wrong. "No? Are you a bad girl, baby?"

"Y-yes," I choke.

"A bad girl who loves having her little pussy fingered." He sucks the lobe of my ear between his teeth, making me whimper. I'm completely lost. And it's not enough. Not even close.

More. More. More.

When he slides a second finger inside me I nearly sob with gratitude. "Oh, yes. Thank y-you." My hand flies down, gripping his wrist, keeping him pressed hard against me. I was rambling, stuttering incoherently, as I rode his fingers. "God. D-don-n't s-stop. Please."

"You wanna come again?"

"Yes!"

"Then do it," he grunts. "Come on my fingers." His teeth sink into my shoulder. The sharp pleasure pain has another orgasm ripping through me. Wetness slicks up the inside of my thighs, coating his fingers. My hips bucking erratically I sob his name, tears pricking my eyes. "What do you say, Ellie?" he all but growls.

"Thank-k you," I manage to gasp.

With a harsh sound he steps back from me. I crumble to my knees on the floor. Unabashedly, he rubs his hand over the prominent bulge in his shorts, silver eyes heavy with arousal. His eyes lock on mine. Raising his fingers to his mouth he slowly licks off my juices.

Jesus Christ.

I'm horny all over again.

Wrapping my hand around the waistband of his shorts I pull him closer. He doesn't stop me when I press my lips against his hard stomach, trailing downward. My hand slides up his chest, my fingers rubbing over his pierced nipple.

"You like that, baby?" he asks hotly.

"Yea," I murmur against his navel, my tongue licking. The hot taste of his skin and masculine scent fills my senses. With a little moan I go lower, kissing his erection. At the same time, I tug on his piercing. He groans in a breath, his cock jerking under his shorts.

"You are so fucking sexy," he rasps, his hand cupping the back of my head.

Leaning back, I lick my lips, rubbing my palm over his hard length. But when I go to unzip his shorts he gives my hair a soft tug.

"No more," he grates.

I gaze up at him. "But..."

"I don't want you to blow me and regret it" His eyes narrow. "Would you feel guilty?"

I flush. I had completely forgotten about Eric. "Yea."

His strokes my hair with a hard sigh. "I can wait."

"I want to do it," I admit softly. He's given me pleasure twice now and I've given him nothing.

"God, damn." Dropping beside me on the floor, he cups either side of my face. His eyes bore into mine, looking right through me. "I could become addicted to you," he murmurs. His tone is strange, quiet and rough.

The feeling is mutual.

His finger tugs at the strap of my bikini. "I never want anyone else to see you in this. Only me. Do you understand?"

I nod, my voice a whisper. "Yes."

"That's my girl." He pulls me against him, his arms wrapping around me. My eyes grow heavy with contentment, the heat of his body making me sleepy.

Trailing a finger down his hard chest a thought strikes me. "Can I ask you a question?"

His lips brush over the top of my head. "Mmm...you can ask me anything."

Blushing, I peek up at him. "Did you really jerk off with my panties?"

"I did," he replies straight faced, his tone amused.

"Surprised you didn't send me a picture," I joke.

His eyes gleam mischievously. "Would you like me too?

"No!"

"Uh-huh. I think you'd like the look of my cock." Leaning down close he murmurs suggestively, "In fact, I know you would."

Good, lord.

My eyes widen.

Chuckling softly, he helps me stand on my feet. "We should head back."

"Okay." I almost don't want to go. I would be perfectly happy to stay out here forever with this man.

Following him back outside I watch as he raises the sails, his movements quick and experienced.

"I wish I knew how to sail like this," I say wistfully.

His eyes light up. Motioning to me with his hand he says, "Come here and I'll let you steer."

"Really?" Excitement bubbling inside me I practically bounce to his side. Adrian laughs, maneuvering me in front of the helm. He stands close behind me, so close that I can feel the heat of his body. My excitement dies, my body growing tight and achy. The man just gave me the best orgasms of my life and I still wasn't satisfied.

"Go ahead and take the helm," he orders, his deep voice right behind my ear. I nod, placing my hands on the wheel. "Good. Now why don't you try and steer us along the coast line for a bit. Try and keep it in view."

Off in the distance I can see the grayed outline of the coast. We were moving slightly away from it and to the right. "So, I just turn it left?"

He chuckles. "It's called to port, but yes."

Feeling nervous I turn the helm to the left. The ship turns, hard, and I jump. Shit. Too hard.

"Easy," Adrian muses. Placing his hands over mine he corrects the helm. "Little movements, baby. She likes it gentle."

My throat constricts. "Okay," I breath huskily. Removing his hands, Adrian places them over my hips. I frown, trying to focus on my task. I want to do well at this. After a few minutes I start to get a feel for it, a smile tugging on my lips.

"You're doing great," he says, and I think I detect a hint of pride in his voice. "I'll make a sailor out of you yet."

I snort. "Yea, right."

"I mean it."

"I bet you say that to all the girls."

He leans down close, his lips brushing against my ear. "I've never brought a woman sailing with me before, Ellie. You're the only one I've ever wanted to share this with."

My lips part at the sharp emotion his words evoke in me.

He steps back. "All yours."

"Wait, what?" I give him a scared look.

"You got this." Sitting down on the bench he leans back, crossing his hands over his stomach.

Wait, did he just shut his god damn eyes!?

"Are you going to sleep?" I practically screech.

"I didn't get much sleep last night. Your fault," he says pointedly. "Wake me up in a half an hour will you, babe?"

My mouth drops. "You can't be serious."

"You'll be fine. Just don't hit another boat."

I glance around anxiously, relaxing when there are no boats in sight. "You're an ass."

He grins. "You're just figuring that out now?"

I smile despite myself, watching him for long moments. I can't believe he trusts me with his best girl. Or that he's never had another woman go sailing with him before. It makes my heart flutter with warmth.

Damn, I'm falling too fast. Too hard.

He may want my body, but I know Adrian will never want me long term. It was foolish for me to have feelings for him. I would only end up hurt in the end.

Badly hurt.

I was right. Being with Adrian was playing with fire. He's going to burn me up into nothing, I just know it.

******

AN: I know, I know, no sex. I'm building it up. Patience my young grasshoppers!