I cursed under my breath when I saw Ethan already sitting in the café. He was painfully prompt even outside his job. "You're late."

"By four minutes." I grabbed the seat next to him as he lifted his head up from the magazine. Chiseled jawline, piercing eyes topped by furrowed brows, and a firm set to his lips, exuding an air of rugged attractiveness, not much suitable for a doctor. It was hard to tell if he was a doctor without his white coat. He was the spitting image of our Dad in his 30s.

"Four minutes are enough to lose or save lives,” he said while putting down the magazine. Ethan was a cardiologist by profession and successful at that. He was among the top 10 best cardiologists in the country.

"Your hospital is right next to this café and I drove thirty kilometers to get here. So, we'll see when we meet up at a place near my campus." But I doubt he'd ever be late. Meeting Ethan outside the hospital premises on weekdays was nearly impossible, that's why I was here.

We continued our sibling talk (mostly him nagging me) for a while. But his words faltered when a dulcet voice called for us. It was Ruth, Ethan's wife.

Despite the stern facade, a subtle warmth softened his gaze, and there was a gentle curve to his lips that hinted at a compassionate nature beneath his firm exterior. Even after four years of marriage, their love was still fresh and thriving.

"Am I late? Did he nag you alot?" Ruth took off her white coat and placed it on the chair along with her bag. She was a doctor as well, in fact they both worked in the same hospital. Their work-place romance was still a hot topic.

"Thank you for coming to my rescue." I winked at Ruth, who just chuckled. I first met Ruth when Ethan introduced her to us during family dinner. But we grew close while pranking and annoying Ethan together. She was warm and kind-hearted and the only person who could keep Ethan on his toes.

"Theo's birthday is next month. At ours. Don't bring a gift." It sounded as if I was called to the court and not to my nephew's birthday. Ethan was always curt and straight to the point, it was his very personality. Ruth nudged him with her elbow while he was wiping his mouth.

"It won't hurt to say it nicely," she said glaring at him. Ruth turned to look at me and smiled. "Make sure to come. Oh- and bring your girlfriend as well."

"Girlfriend?" Ethan and I said in unison. Surprise plastered over our faces. Confusion plastered over Ruth's face after seeing our reactions. "Theo told me that you have one, do you not?"

Ethan glared at me from beside Ruth. I mouthed to him that it's not true. I had told him a few minutes earlier that I was not in a relationship and given my history of relationships, his concern and irk was understandable. They always ended badly.

"He must've misunderstood something." I shook my head. I had to have a talk with my little buddy. "Okay, girlfriend or not, but you have to come. Mom and Dad will be there as well." Ruth smiled.

"Of course, I will. Well then-" I said, returning the smile and standing up. I grabbed my things and turned to look at Ethan. He had his cold demeanor back on again, "and I will definitely bring a gift. An expensive one at that," saying I hurried to leave before he could catch me. I hold my life dear.

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

I walked down the same old paths of the campus. I had post lunch lectures to attend but I knew my mind wouldn't let me. It was already preoccupied by someone. Like a child, I anticipated bumping into Kayra and I couldn't suppress the playful grin which surfaced at the thought of her.

As if the heavens listened to my thoughts and answered- There she was, coming towards me with her head hung low, engaged in her phone. Light wind blew the stray strands of hair away from her face, while I stood still on my spot admiring the view of Kayra looking more than just beautiful. But she suddenly turned the other way. I knew she saw me and purposely turned to avoid me. Like I'd let her do that.

I overtook her and walked backwards ahead of her, matching her pace. But Kayra didn't stop. In fact, she didn't, not even once looked up from her phone. She peeked at our steps in between to not bump into me like she knew who was in front of her. Proof of her avoidance. If she was trying to annoy me, then it wasn't working. But it's my turn to annoy her now. I stopped abruptly and she did as well. She tried to move aside and leave but I still blocked her way. After trying for several times, she finally gave up and stopped, sighing.

“Don't you know it's common sense that when someone ignores you, you ignore them back," she said looking up at me with irritated expressions.

"I can't believe you! You used me and now you're discarding me." My eyes widened as I covered my mouth with my palm and pointed my index finger towards her. I just knew my overdramatic ass was going to enjoy this. "You just wanted my body. How debauched!"

"What? You were the one to shoo my dates away." She retorted, visibly perplexed by my remarks and maybe a little taken aback.

"You defiled me."

"What are you saying?" She whisper-yelled as if someone would hear her. She smacked my arms with wide eyes and hushed me. Her reactions were getting more amusing by the day.

"That you fucked me and took my innocence,” I said a little too loudly, just to mess with her.

Kayra huffed out a breath. "What! Please! You weren't innocent to begin with and what's with these accusations, we mutually agreed to do it." She raised her voice as well, after ensuring no one was near. Her eyes were throwing daggers at me, and only god knows how hard I was holding in my laughs. "Do what?" I asked, playing dumb.

"Have sex,” she said with closed eyes, obviously embarrassed. The word 'sex' from her lips strangely excited me. Just like that night, 'fuck me Nolan.' I shook my head to get those thoughts out.

"When did I agree to it?" I calmed down my horses and focused on the present Kayra in front of me, not the drunk, needy Kayra begging me to fuck her.

"You didn't push me away when I kissed-" she paused, her cheeks tinted pink like she remembered and the flashback flashed in front of her eyes.

My lips curved into a smirk. "What? Threw myself on you and sucked the life out of you with a kiss?" I sprinkled some salt over her wound. The look on her face clearly showed how much she wanted for the ground to split and swallow her whole.

"Shut up!" She yelled. Before, only her cheeks were red but now her whole face was a tomato. She closed her ears and glared at me. "Why are you avoiding me? Do I excite you that much?" I cheekily smiled to annoy her more.

"Stop. Nolan," she said with gritted teeth and her fists clenched, ready to beat the shit out of me. "What does it mean?" I asked.

"Stop means to not-"

"Not that. About that night. About us." My smile dropped. The playfulness vanished, replacing it with tension. I'd rather not have a serious anything let alone a conversation but this was about us. We needed clarity. What happens next? What does she think of me? Etc.

"It means nothing." The immediacy of her response hurted me more than it should have. It didn't require her any time to think it over to be sure. She didn't even have to think at all, the answer was always there. It meant nothing. We are nothing.

"It was a mistake," she said, looking away. Finally she said the words I dreaded to hear. I thought I could handle this, but boy, I was wrong, it was hurting like hell, like someone threw a hundred pound rock on my heart.

Perhaps she was lying because she avoided meeting my eyes. Like she didn't want to admit the truth or maybe she was just scared. Kayra didn't even see the effect she had on me. So, there was only one way to find out.

"Was it-" I stepped closer to her. "really-" My fingers slowly traced her cheekbone, "a mistake?" My hand cupped her neck as her breath hitched. Her composure crumbled bit by bit with each word. My cheeks brushed against hers and I whispered close to her ears, "hmm, Kayra?" She visibly shivered at the mention of her name. Her lips parted as I closed the remaining space between us but she seemed to be frozen in her place.

I tilted my head and my lips hovered over hers. I caressed her jaw with my thumb which helped her process faster. Her eyes collided with mine and when she didn't push me away nor slap me, I kissed her.

Relief washed over me at the familiar scent and taste of her. Our lips molded perfectly into each other and she slightly opened her mouth to let me in. She clutched my shirt tightly when I inserted my tongue in her mouth. Obviously, she didn't let me in without a fight.

My tongue swirled inside her mouth, revisiting places and knowing her sensitive spots worked well in my favor. Kayra hummed in my mouth sending electric shocks inside me, exciting me.

She sucked on the small bruise on my lip she gave me that night. She was much more freakier than she let on, moreover she was totally sober right now. We kissed like our lives depended on it. Being too engrossed in the deep sensations of our bodies touching each other, when we were practically pressed together. She stumbled on a rock and bent backwards, but my arm held her from around her waist, saving her from a nasty fall. She didn't seem to care at all.

I dipped in further and sucked on her upper lip while she drew in long breaths. My eyes met her moist and dark ones, almost making me lose my senses. She didn't let go of my shirt and I, of her waist. We both knew what we wanted. At least at that moment.

Her back leaned against the tree beside the pathway. Her lips parted, grip tightened and the other palm rested on my chest. She closed her eyes and lifted her head. Once again, our lips met in a tender dance, a symphony of shared breaths and unspoken emotions.

The air around us crackled in anticipation, when my palm trailed down from her hip to thighs and then up once again. I played with the hem of her dress. Lifting it slowly, leaving soft caresses in its wake on her delicate flesh. She shivered at the cold touch of my fingers against her warm bare thighs. Just when I reached the elastic of her panties, her eyes widened.

The bubble broke, anticipation disappeared and emotions shattered. She pulled back and turned to look at the way the loud laughs were coming from. She pushed me away from over her and stared at the ground until fortunately the group turned the other way and was too engaged to notice us.

Her face flushed when she realized what just happened. She glanced at me for the last time and was leaving when I grabbed her wrist, preventing her from doing so.

"Don't,” I said, my emotions getting the best of me. She still didn't look back at me. It relieved me that she could not see me helpless but it disappointed me as well that she couldn't see my feelings.

My feelings took over and my emotions got the best of me. "I like you, Kayra." There were many ways to say this but this wasn't how I wanted to do it. This wasn't even in my list of 121 ways to ask Kayra out. I messed up but now's not the time to wallow over it. Just make this mess count.

Kayra didn't react nor did she move. I desperately wished she'd look back, at least for a second. She stayed still as moments passed and my heart died with anticipation. Finally, what felt like eternity, she freed her wrist from my grasp and turned to look at me. Her eyes were blurred and lips quivered, "You don't…you shouldn't." Her voice barely whispers in the end.

Her answer made sense. In fact, it was the confirmation for my suspicions about her leaving. But still her denying my feelings made me feel enraged from within. My feelings are mine and I know them. She was redrawing the line between us again but I won't allow it this time. My own eyes stinged but I pulled myself together. "I know you'll be leaving…but I can't stop my feelings, I've fallen for you damn it!"

She seemed taken aback by my words. A single tear then another, soon a silent stream flowed from her widened eyes. She stifled her sobs with her palm. I suddenly realized the bomb I just dropped on her. She didn't have any idea that I knew. She was hurt. I made her hurt. My heart twisted looking at her state. "Kayra-" I took a careful step forward to wipe her tears and embrace her and tell her ‘Everything was fine. Everything will be.' but she stepped back, raising her palm to stop me.

"Don't." She glared at me with her red, teary eyes. She looked the very definition of hurt and betrayed. I was selfish and a fool, who only cared about himself. I wanted to punch myself in the gut and fall on my knees and beg for forgiveness. The despise in her eyes pricked me more than a thousand needles together could.

"You. don't. know. anything." Her voice was stern and broken at the same time. Her eyes were as cold as ice. She was shaking all over, her breathing heavy. She looked like she'd collapse any minute now but I couldn't reach out to her, I was frozen, her words pierced my heart and broke my soul. I was physically intact but everything inside was crushed. It was a miracle I was still standing. I stayed at the same place even after Kayra had left from there, from my sight.

And finally my legs gave up. The cold, prickling grass dug into my legs but I was too numb to notice. I had expected rejection but never to see her hurt like that. I knew she hated me but I was sure there was a tiny corner in her heart which accepted me, like I had for her. I felt like I just destroyed that corner and earned more despisal.