{Pic of Tobias}

Song: Wolves

Artist (s): Selena Gomez, Marshmello

Evil comes from the abuse of free will.

*Sensitive Content*

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It had been just over 3 hours since I had returned from my detention. Just over 3 hours of laying on the cold kitchen floor. Tobias and my step father were beyond pissed, when I had returned home and iy was no surprise when they took it out on me. Apparently, I had starved them.

I groaned once again, as I tried to move. I remember by step-father throwing himself at me, flinging me back across the table. Only then did I feel the soaring, stinging pain that ran from my left wrist to the crease inside my elbow. Dazed and disoriented, I looked up from the ground and saw Tobias standing above me. He grabbed a fistful of my hair dragging me back to my step-father before they began delivering blow after blow for the next hour.

There was a definite possibility that I had broken a few ribs as well as having sprained my left wrist. I held back a cry, finally pushing myself up and against the kitchen counter. There was no one at home right now, for which I was extremely thankful for. I steadily made my way to the cupboard and took out two painkillers to help ease my pain. I then moved to the refrigerator and retrieved some ice before wrapping it up in a kitchen towel, pressing it against my ribs softly.

I limped upstairs to my bedroom, finally letting the tears flow freely. I tucked my hand under my mattress, rummaging for the only thing I kept under it. When my hand touched a laminated paper, I let out a breathe of relief. I easily pulled it out, holding it close to myself as I laid down facing the ceiling. I wrapped both my hands around the only picture I had of my parents.

"I miss you" I whimpered, choking on my own sobs.

"Why'd you leave me? You should have taken me with you. I hate it here. I hate it" I cried. My ribs screamed in pain when I began to cry harder. I took deep breaths, trying to calm my racing heart before tucking the photograph back safely where I found it.

Survival mode is supposed to be a phase that helps save your life. Not the way you live, but for me it was.

*****

I wasn't always bullied at school. There was a time, when I was actually social. But it changed after my parents died. I got quieter, my nights became longer, my blades got bigger, my sleeves got longer, my meals got smaller, I got skinnier, and no one noticed.

My hoodie covered my busted lip and my long sleeve covered my bruised wrist, as I walked through the school hallway. I limped as fast as my injured leg would allow me, but life was too much of a bitch to allow me to live peacefully. I was only one turn away from my classroom, when a foot was stuck out in front of me, initiating my fall.

My books slipped out of my hands, since my first priority was to stop my fall. My hands fell in front of me as I stopped my ribs from hitting the ground. Another zing of pain shot up my wrist and ribs as I let out a shriek of pain. My breathing began getting heavier by the second as laughter echoed the entire hallway.

"Oh, stop being so dramatic" Michelle laughed as she pulled me up. My hand wrapped around my abdominal trying to seize the pain.

"What the hell happened to your face?" Michelle scrutinised my face.

"Actually, I don't care" She laughed again as did her fellow group members. You would expect me to cry, but I didn't. Do you know why? because I'm so used to it. From the corner of my eye I saw Tobias walking in our direction and I unconsciously took a step back. Tobias came to stand next to Michelle, wrapping an arm around her waist.

"Leave the girl alone. You might just break her" he laughed pathetically. I was slightly hunched over at this point, but I didn't dare show the pain on my face. Tobias moved forward purposely grabbing hold of my injured wrist, pulling at me. He leant down to whisper something in my ear but thankfully he was interrupted.

"Let the girl go" A rough voice ordered. My head whipped around to see Neel standing across me, his back leaning against a locker.

"She's my sister. I can do whatever the hell I want with her" Tobias replied after a few seconds. Neel glared at him, kicking himself off the locker, stalking towards us.

"I said. Get. Off. Her, you dick-less moron" Neel ordered once again, stressing each word. Why was he here? This was going to end so badly.

"Ironic coming from you" Tobias laughed looking around. "Your dick, is probably a tic tac". Tobias continued to snigger but the rest of the hallway was dead-silent. Everyone feared Neel, just like Tobias did. The only difference was that, Tobias was good at hiding it.

"No wonder, your moms mouth is so fresh" Neel shot back - grabbing my arm beginning to pull me down the hallway - as the entire hallway bursted into laughter. As soon as we rounded the corner, Neel let go of my hand.

"Follow me" he said and I did as asked. He lead me to a secluded area, stopping only when he was sure no one would disturb us.

"What happened to you?" he asked looking at my busted lip, then his eyes wandered down to my swollen wrist. I instantly covered up my arm, hiding it by my side.

"I, erm, I walked into a lamppost" I stuttered, not looking him in the eye.

"Sure" he sighed.

"Listen, I'm not gonna beg you to tell me. Either tell me, and I can help you or don't tell me, and deal with whatever the fuck is going on yourself" He stood there staring at me for a few more minutes. When I didn't say anything he walked off.

"Don't be expecting help from me next time" were his last words. Everything was going wrong. Everything. I didn't want his help, it's what's best. For the rest of the day, I went to all my classes, mindlessly following the crowd, until the bell signalled the end of school. I took my time walking back to the house, knowing Tobias was furious.

I looked around the driveway and saw only the car belonging to Tobias parked up. My step-father wasn't home. I hesitantly, opened the door, stepping in trying to be as quiet as possible. Just as my feet touched the stairs, a voice called out from behind.

"How do you know Neel?" Tobias asked. I turned around facing him, keeping my eyes on the ground.

"I don't" I whispered. Tobias was raging at this point. He strode towards me in three large steps, and gripped the back of my head pulling me closer.

"It better stay that way" he gritted. Instead of letting go, he dragged me to the living room, throwing me across the room. My face scrunched up in pain, but I didn't let out a sound. I stared up at Tobias from ground, knowing what was about to happen.

"Take off your clothes" He grumbled as he began taking off his own. I held back the tears, slowly stripping.

"Hurry up" he roared making me jump. When I didn't comply, he personally ripped them off me. He held me down, purposefully putting all his weight on my ribs. When I let out a scream as he entered me, he shoved my shirt in my mouth, holding me down harder. I was lucky that my step-father wasn't home, otherwise they would have taken turns. But other days, I wasn't so lucky. Silent tears rolled down my cheek, each thrust sending a new jolt of pain up my body.

I felt like a prisoner. I felt kidnapped and hiding in plain sight. I could have walked down the street at any time and said, 'I'm being raped by my own step-brother and step-father', but who would have believed me? No-one. Why?

Because rape is the only crime in which the victim becomes the accused.

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Rape. It just a taboo topic, that no one is willing to talk about. Why though? Rape is something that happens every day, whether it's women, men or kids. Rape should be openly discussed so people aren't scared to come forward and ask for help. It disgusts me that, on a rape trial it is always the victim who is questioned. 'What clothes were you wearing? Why were you out so late?' Why do those things even matter. RAPE IS NEVER THE VICTIMS FAULT. EVER!

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