Chapter Five: Desperate Times Call For  Abusing Your Dad's Credit Card 

"Not that I care but are you like, okay?"

Concern coming from Leila is strange, like waking up in an alternate universe where carbs don't go straight to your hips. I blink a couple of times to make sure I heard her right and she probably thinks I'm an idiot.

"Uh yeah, why wouldn't I be?"

"Because you've been staring at the computer screen for the last five minutes as if your favourite pair of shoes are out of stock."

I mean my problem is a lot more serious than not finding shoes but I'm assuming it would something really tragic for Leila.

"I'm fine, honestly." I give her a thumbs up that she eyes weirdly. Then with a toss of her hair she goes back to work, back to the same job as I am and that's prepping for our Chicago trip. Ever since she's found out about it she's been on edge, like a newly sober alcoholic trying to not to look at the six pack of beer in the corner store. I don't know why but she seems to think we're competing, when realistically there's nothing there for us to win. This campaign will be shared by us equally, our job descriptions are basically the same and Amy doesn't exactly play favourites so I'm not sure what my colleague is gaining by constantly trying to one up me.

Regardless, I'm not in the mood to compete today. The fact that Cole won't be there when I fly out to Chicago has put a major dent in my mood and in my plans. I don't know when I'll see him next, probably Thanksgiving but even that remains to be seen because of his dad's health. I miss him so much that it's physically affecting me and weighing me down. Everyday that I have to get out of a lonely bed and later go back to an empty apartment makes me question my decision to get a job in New York.

I could have stayed with him, we could have been together. But, a voice inside my head whispers, we needed this time apart to grow up and as cheesy as it sounds, find ourselves. For so long, I've always pictured myself in relation to Cole and now in this city where every decision has to be about me and only me, it feels strange, like I'm doing something wrong. But at the same time I'm finding out a lot about who I am as a person, every single day that I survive on my own and that's an experience I really wouldn't want to miss out on.

So yes, it's tough and it's difficult to go so long without seeing Cole and yes I have the occasional sob fest but at the end of the day, I see our temporary separation for what it is; a chance to grow up and to define ourselves as individuals before we dive headfirst into our lives together.

***

On my way back home that night something happens that's never happened before and I don't quiet know what to make of it. I'm well aware that I'm not the only one living in the building and that I do have my fair share of neighbors. It's yet another fallback of my antisocial nature that I haven't gotten myself acquainted with anyone on my floor let alone the building. I think we work odd hours and although I've seen people in passing and in the elevator, there's never been any time for chit chat.

Which is why I'm surprised when as I'm making my way out of the elevator, juggling five different bags of groceries and my bag and my keys, nearly spilling the contents of all of the above on the floor I have a very kind stranger help me and grab some of my bags before

"Whoa, are you okay?"

In so many way I'm not but I bet this guy doesn't want to hear about my existential crisis so I give him the short brief, normal answer.

"Kind of, though I would have had my groceries rolling down the corridor if it wasn't for your help. Thank you."

When we straighten up and I get a chance to look at him, I'm surprised to see that the guy looks about my age, give or take a few years older. My dad told me that most of the residents of my building are older couples or families with young children . I think that's one of the reasons he really wanted me to stay here, you can't get in a lot of trouble when everyone around you is worrying about play dates and school runs. But this guy, I don't think my dad knows about this resident. He's tall, on the lanky side with one of those serious looking faces. His eyes are close set and covered by a pair of thick framed, probably designer glasses, a Roman nose sitting haughtily on his face and pouty lips. He's got a naturally tan complexion and I can see a hint of a tattoo peaking out from beneath the collar of his shirt. He's dressed like a lot of the men you'd see on the streets on New York, stylish but quirky with all monochrome outfit paired with something more statement, in his case his sneakers with cobalt blue detailing.

"No problem, where'd you like me to carry these?"

I point him towards my apartment which in hindsight isn't the best decision. He could be an axe murderer for all I know. But as we're carrying my bags in that direction, I hear a door opening behind us and a faint, elderly voice.

"Nathan honey, you forgot to take the leftovers."

I turn to see an older woman, close to Nana Stone's age emerge from one of the apartments down the hall. She's holding on to a tupperware container and looking pointedly in our direction. Nathan, I assume is the guy that's helping me.

"I'll be right back Grandma, just helping your neighbor..." he looks at me, as if to ask my name and I answer with a quick, "Tessa", "your neigbor Tessa with her bags. I'll be right back."

"Oh, bless you." She looks almost giddily from me to her grandson and goes back into her apartment. I've seen her around a couple of times, usually when I'm rushing out in the morning and she comes out to get her morning paper. This guy, Nathan must be her grandson and I do not like the way she was practically glowing as she left us alone.

"Where were we going again?"

Oh right, I can't let the poor man lift what likely is nearly fifty pounds worth of junk food in those environmentally responsible shopping bags.

"Oh gosh, I'm so sorry. This way." Together we lug the bags all the way to my apartment which is conveniently located much further away from the rest of the residents on this floor, thanks to my family and their tendency to take overprotective to a whole new level.

I let the bags go and unlock the door, dumping everything in my hands onto the kitchen counter the moment I enter. Nathan waits hesitantly at the doorstep until I invite him in.

"Thank you so much. I don't know why I thought I could have carried these all the way home by myself."

He shrugs, "It's not a problem. I help my grandma out with her supermarket run at least once a week so I've mastered the art of carrying bags that weigh as much as I do."

I cringe, realising that I must have gone right at it in the chocolate and ice cream aisle, as a way to deal with the blow that fate has dealt me. I took one look at the airplane ticket waiting for me in my inbox and realised that I needed to binge and binge fast.

"So are you new around here?" He asks, shoving his hands in his pockets and subtly surveying the place which I hope isn't too much of a mess.

"Yup, just moved in a couple of weeks ago."

"So, I think you're the blonde grandma keeps insisting I meet." He laughs and runs a hand through his hair, "I think she's ecstatic that we ran into each other today. I'm Nathan." He extends his hand towards me which I shake for a second. "Tessa, like I said before."

Keeping in mind that I can't hold up a conversation with a complete stranger for more than ten seconds without it getting awkward, I find myself struggling for words to say.

"So, thanks again. Can I get you something to drink at least?"

For the record, I don't keep a lot of alcohol in the house despite being legally allowed to drink. I just don't suit drinking because I'm that lightweight who will agree to give away her first born child after the first couple of sips of wine. So, as a precautionary measure I don't surround myself with the enticement but given that this man helped me, I probably should offer him more than soda.

"No, I should probably head out." He gestures outside, "Grandma's probably waiting in the hallway wanting to hear all about how we're headed off to Vegas to get married next."

I laugh, that sounds like such a Nana Stone thing to say.

"Does she live alone?" I ask.

He shrugs, "We've tried to make her move in with my parents but she's not very agreeable. This place is great but we worry you know? It's been a few years since grandpa died."

My heart begins to hurt and I make a mental note to try and get to know her and just keep an eye on things.

"Well, if you need any help just let me know."

He grins, "That'd be great. I try coming by as much as I can but it'll be good to know that there's someone looking out for her."

"I definitely will."

And I think that's how I made my first, non-work acquaintance in the city.

***

"Hey," I call Cole a few days later, wondering if he's still planning on heading home and feeling terrible that I don't want him to.

I'm calling at our regular time, when the two of us are so bone tired that keeping our eyes open is a challenge in itself. I've had a particularly hard day at work, having been on my feet all day since Amy's assistant called in sick. After running errands and getting lost all over the city, I just wanted to go home, soak in my bathtub and have a nice, long nap.

But that's not going to happen.

I don't let Cole know but I'm flying out in a couple of hours, having only come home to shower, change clothes, grab my suitcase and get out the door.

"You sound exhausted." He laughs, "But so do I. We really should find a better time to talk."

I hear him walking around his apartment, hear the sound of a closet being opened and shut. Maybe he's packing as well?

"I know right?" I stifle a yawn, eyeing the coffee that I've left brewing in the kitchen. "But first tell me, how's your dad?"

"Cassandra's put him on bed rest, no questions asked. She said she needs to monitor his heart and run some tests so he's agreed, obviously not very easily."

"That's good though, are you still going home?"

"They don't want me to." He sighs and I picture him massaging his temples. Recently with the amount of stress he's been under, he's had headaches more often than not. I'm taken back to a time when he'd just crash with his head in my lap and I'd just sit there, letting him sleep and massaging his head.

Of course he'd return the favour two fold. I feel a headache of my own building when I think of the week ahead of me.

"If you think you need to go, you should. No regrets."

"Yeah, no regrets." He agrees and we switch to Facetime.

I make sure that my suitcase isn't in the background when I settle down on my bed. Looking at the clock, I have less than two hours to get my stuff together and rush to the airport. But all that can wait, Cole needs someone to talk to and Amy can grab her own Starbucks for once in her life.

"So how's your week been so far?"

I tell him about my nice neighbor, Linda who now thinks it's her responsibility to deliver handmade treats to my door. I also tell him about Nathan, who now that I know about I notice more and more in and around the building.

"Oh," there's a slight tension in his face and I can see his jaw lock. "Has this guy been coming around a lot?"

I roll my eyes, "He's not a serial killer, I promise. He's a good guy, takes care of his grandma a lot. Actually the two really remind me of you and Nana Stone. We should really try and see her more often."

"She's actually coming home and staying with Dad for a few weeks."

I laugh "Wow, Cassandra really pulled out the big guns this time around didn't she."

"She did. She thinks having me come home would be a bit of an overkill since Jay's ready to fly out as well." I wince at the hurt tone in his voice.

"She's probably right, you know. If Sheriff Stone feels like you're all conspiring against him, he'll be at the station faster than you can hide his handcuffs."

"I just...I want to be there for him but he' so stubborn. They want me to focus on school and keep my grades up but I'm out here worrying if he's going to have a heart attack at any given second."

It's the first time he's voice his worst fear and I wish I could tell him that everything's going to be okay, that he doesn't need to worry, that life isn't unpredictable and that things always turn out the way we want them to.

But I can't say any of that with complete honesty so I just say the one thing that I can truly assure him of.

"I'll always be there for you, you know that right?"

"I know shortcake. I couldn't have done this without you and I hope you know that. Now, getting back to this Nathan you've been talking about so much..."

Ah, Cole.

***

So I'm onboard for the nearly three hour flight not knowing if I'll find Cole when I get there or not. We ended the call with him still unsure. He'd booked the flight, packed his bags but he'd been strictly told by his parents not to come yet.

"If you twitch any more, I'm going to have them change my seat."

I glare at Leila, "Sorry, I'm just nervous okay."

"You should be. I still can't believe Amy let you come for this press trip. I don't need your help, it's not like you know something that I don't."

"I'm not here to help you, much as I would love the opportunity. I have my own assignments and I'll remember check off, 'not letting Leila get you down with her sad, sad thoughts' of the list when I get to the hotel. Seriously, you need to start meditating or something. Your negativity is ruining my vibe."

I put on my noise cancelling headphones and try to not strangle the girl next to me.

When we land, tottering after Amy and making sure none of her bags get left behind, we're whisked away to a Four Seasons and checked into our rooms. It's still early in the morning when we arrive and I don't have work until later in the evening so the three of us, equally exhausted beeline for our rooms when given the key.

"Remember, we have our first drinks and dinner with the team today so I want you two dressed and ready to see me in the lobby by 7 PM tonight. Got it?"

I almost salute her ala Cadet Kelly but instead go for a simple nod.

"And for the love of God, play nice. I don't want the hotel staff waking me up from my nap to tell me that my two minions are misbehaving."

"You won't hear a peep from us." Leila and I pretend to zip our mouths and watch in silence as Amy struts away, the bellboy following her with luggage that nearly tips over because of its weight.

"So..." I begin, "unfortunately we've got rooms next to each other."

"I'll pretend you don't exist if you do the same." Leila destroys any attempts that I might make at trying to get along for the next six days.

"It'll be like you're staying next door to a silent film character, I promise." I tell her and off we go, riding on two different elevators towards rooms that couldn't be closer if they were twins in the womb.

***

I unpack my things and then try to sleep for a little bit. If I've read our itinerary correctly then I'll be on my feet all night and I could use a good old power nap right about now. I turn my phone off, having told anyone who cares that I've arrived safely. My fingers hover over Cole's name on my contact list, wondering if I should text if not call him. His flight's supposed to take off any second so I settle for a 'Have a safe trip. I love you." text and then I'm out.

The ringing of the hotel phone wakes me up. I'm terribly disorientated and struggle to place myself at first. When I'm finally able to recognise the familiar layout of the Four Seasons room, I get off my butt and reach for the phone, hoping my voice isn't too groggy. I'm told by the reception desk that I have a call and they rattle off a number so quickly that I'm not able to even identify the caller.

Once I'm connected, it becomes apparent who it is. My other best friend and doctor in the making, Megan Sharp who lives and is going to med school in Maryland.

"You are the worst surprise giver ever!" She half screams half shouts at me through the phone and I pull it away from my ear.

"W-what did I do?" I'm still trying to clear the sleepiness from my head and right now I'm a solid four on the scale of being awake. Looking at my wrist, which I did not take off and which must have left a beautiful imprint on the side of my face, I realise that I sadly only got about two hours of sleep before being woken up by a screeching redhead.

"Why are you shouting at me? It's too early for this."

I plop back into bed and my eyes begin to close on their own.

"Your boyfriend is looking for you and he's worried out of his mind."

"What?" This definitely makes me sit up.

"Alex just came home and told me that Cole was supposed to fly home today but he changed his mind. Instead, since he'd taken the time off anyway he wanted to talk to you and ask whether he should just fly up to see you."

"Oh."

"Oh, right. Alex, I don't know how, didn't actually let it slip that you're in Chicago there to surprise him. So a very lost, probably sad Cole is waiting at the airport, wondering if someone called Nathan has murdered his girlfriend."

"My phone was turned off, I had no idea..."

"I think he's headed home now, probably worried out of his mind. I don't know how long he's been trying to reach you but hey, you can probably put Operation Trench coat into action now." She laughs and despite the circumstances, I do too.

"It's too cold out here for me to go out there dressed in nothing but a coat okay?" I role my eyes, but even as I sit there and talk to Megan, I'm flooded with a sense of excitement.

Oh My God.

Six whole days with Cole!

Shoot, I don't think I've packed anything remotely sexy.

"Tessa...hey, did I lose you already?"

"Megan, I think we have a problem." I hit myself in the face with a pillow.

"What?" She sounds concerned.

"I only brought granny panties with me this time!"

And the wicked witch laughs, she laughs for a long, long time.

***

The image of a desolate Cole makes me run around my hotel room like a crazy morning. It's still around 10AM so I know I have quite some time before our event tonight. I can go, meet Cole, kiss all his pains away and be back in time to throw on a little black dress and pretend that I'be got my life together.

I'm shoving my legs into a pair of skinny jeans when there's a knock on the door. I waddle towards the door, buttoning up the jeans and look through the peephole to see a very disgruntled Leila.

"One minute," I call out and change into a black, long sleeved top. I'm donning an all black outfit today in the hopes that it might come across as chic and not that I did not pack like I'm flying out to see the love of my life.

"I'm getting older by the minute Tessa, stop wasting my time."

Rolling my eyes, I make sure to saunter on my way back to the door. Throwing it open, I lean against the door and try and look like I've got better things to and better people to see.

"How can I help you?"

She looks at me from head to toe, carefully taking everything in.

"Where are you off to?"

"Just going to see a friend."

"We're not here to socialise, we're here to work. I came in here so that we could go over some last minute details to make sure everything goes smoothly tonight and you don't mess anything up."

"What last minute details? We went over everything back in the office. We could not be more prepared."

She shrugs, a cruel smile forming on her face. "Amy's orders, the brand's just sent out some new press releases and we don't have a lot of time to go over the material."

Why do I get the feeling that she's been sitting over this one for a while?

It's because she has and she can practically sense my eagerness to leave, it's only making her more eager to imprison me.

"I look longingly at the elevator behind her, then at my watch. I have to get out of here but there's no way that I can give Leila the satisfaction of proving to Amy that I'm the deadweight in the team.

Think, Tessa, think.

Leila stands there, a smirk playing on her lips. "So, let's get to work shall we?"

Maybe not so fast, desperate times call for shamelessly abusing your parents' bank accounts.

"So Leila, how do you feel about a trip to Nordstrom?"