Maybe something will happen.

Maybe something will change.

And I always ask myself this question, "Am I ready for this change? Can I take this leap of faith?"

But I want to and I need to. I need to get up from my sleepy state, I have to freshen up and take the world on my palm and believe me it is a dreadful task. But the biggest question of all arises; can I ever leave behind my procrastination and do what I am destined to do?

But what am I destined to do?

Every day my plan changes everyday circumstances changes and every day my resolve to make my life better changes.

But with bucket loads of determination, I have decided that something needs to be done. For how long am I going to sit and think of doing the same chores that I have been doing for a thousand years? I wonder can the answer be an eternity. If your most of the life is spent in doing the same monotonous work with no sense of creativity and passion to strive better, then your 23 years will give the reflection of a thousand years.

But Scarlet, let's face it. Today you are going to step out of this door, face your uncle and you will tell him with your full determined voice that you are all set to go on the tour that you have always dreamed of. He will bombard you with questions like your safety, your stay, food and every other worry that doesn't even relate with this journey, but you are not going to chicken out in front of him and no tears, absolutely no tears begging to go out and live your backpack dream. Face him like a strong warrior and you will emerge victorious in this battle.

Win your life.

But first, get your ass out of this sleepy, comfy bed and don't, don't you dare wrap yourself more into the warmth of your blanket. Face your own determined self today.

After giving all the pep talks of the entire world, I started heading towards my destiny and I should not be afraid. 

Here goes nothing Scarlet, you won't perish, just knock the door and head-on. Do it.

After chanting the mantra of not to be a chicken and squaring my shoulders, I gave the most melancholic knock on the door, very very lightly.

'Hey pal, am I interrupting something?'

My uncle in his brown sheltered haven surrounded by N-number of books and newspapers was sitting peacefully on the mahogany armchair with a cigar in one hand and crime novel in one. He looked up and I just did the silent prayer that O heavens! This should not be bad timing.

'Yeah, nothing much but you did interrupt me while I was on the verge to know how this girl fooled the readers by portraying a different set of personality that isn't hers.'

What? Was he talking about me? I gave a quizzical look to the novel that he was reading and gave a sigh of relief.

'Oh!!! So, you got hooked up with Gone Girl. Isn't it interesting?'

'Don't even let me start with it. I can't wait yet almost can't bear to turn the pages. But yeah do tell me; to what do I own the honour of your presence in this chirping morning?'

Breathe, square your shoulders and GO. Don't get intimidated by his stare.

With the utmost determination, I said, 'Uncle, as you already know and I want to remind you again, don't smoke too much, it's injurious for your health'

Chicken, even chicken would be ashamed that you are this much chicken.

'You came here to tell me this?'

No, I came here to be a woman of substance.

'No and Yes. Yes, this is also important because you know I love you and I really care for you and I have something else to say about something that I need to inform you'.

'You know Scarlet; you have the habit of beating around the bush. Too bad. Come to the point.'

Fine, fine, fine.

'Angel, as you know that I am saving all my life to go on my own for travelling around the places. You know how much I admire and cherish the idea of meeting with new people. So, I was planning that before I dive myself into the world of corporates, I want to, NO, scratch that, I need to fulfil my dream.'

He was giving me a long hard stare and I knew a thousand questions must be brimming in his mind, but I had to take the next step. So, I sat down on the mahogany armchair laid in front of him, took both of his hands in my palms and gave a light squeeze. Gone Girl, you just wait for a little bit, if my cards are laid right, then even this girl will be gone for straight one month.

'So, I wanted to inform you that I am planning to leave next week and I came here to seek your blessings. I am taking this journey to fall in love.'

To fall in love with myself and with my dreams.

Laying his hand on my head to give me blessings was not difficult but his next question startled me.

'Are you going to get married?'

'What? No!!!! Who said that?'

Who has put such unimportant thought in his head?

'Angel, you know I am still a child for marriage-' and I folded my arms while pointing out this 'but yeah definitely a strong and independent woman who doesn't chicken out for travelling the world on her own'

'My love, you already know that I am not that religious'.

'But...'

He raised his hand.

'I know about your dream and I know how hard you have worked for it and I admire that. But, will it be safe, you going out all alone? Is the world will be that welcoming to you? You might face a shortage of money or worst, of food. What if you don't get to stay in a good place? What if you finally find someone in this journey and then you will leave this poor old soul for that idiotic, stupid, young breed'.

I chuckled for his last part and gave a long sigh for his irrelevant fears.

'My old man, believe me, he won't be a dog. He will be a man.'

He scowled and then added, 'yeah this old man knows that he denotes the man. It is as same as saying that I have a daughter and she's a girl'.

I giggled but no, I had to be serious. This conversation couldn't go in vain.

'Hey, chuck that scowl, it doesn't suit you but believe me when I say this that nothing can be accomplished if I will always cocoon myself in the blanket of security. If dangers will come, let me face it. I need to make myself strong in adverse situations. So, what if I won't be able to get food for a day, I won't die. Let me learn to survive. So, please have little faith in me and let me go out. It will be great; I will send you postcards and letters from whichever place I will be. Just imagine how much I will learn when I will be out and learning different things from different people. It won't be bad and I am sure that even you know that it will be worth it. Please, uncle, let me take this step and let me live my life.' 

I was sincerely pleading; I hope it could show on my face.

He gave me a long hard stare.

Uncle, say something. Anything. Just don't say NO.

'Since how long you have been giving yourself pep talks for this conversation?'

I looked at him sheepishly but with full-fledged confidence stated, 'believe me everything just poured out from my heart. Not only my heart, the bottom of my heart'

I did. No lying about that. Believe me all right!

After a long pause, he finally uttered, 'well then, if you are already adamant to go, I won't stop you but always remember that this old man has no one but you.'

'And nothing on this planet can make me forget this bond.'

He kissed my forehead which was his way of giving blessings and I definitely did a happy dance on my way out. One week will get over in a blink of an eye and I hope it does.

My uncle had always been protective of me since I was 5 years old. 18 years ago, he held the hand of the little girl that he saw sitting on a park bench on a rainy day, shivering and crying for food. The eyes of that girl became blurry with excess crying, no one was listening to her cries and pleas and then after waiting for someone, she saw a man coming towards her, held her and the first word that came from her mouth was Angel. Since that day onwards he became my father, my mother and everything. So, how could I forget that even I didn't have anyone but him? 

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