I wake up on the sofa, groaning. Why did I act like that last night? I should not have been so vulnerable. Weak. Pathetic.

I have to be strong. I have to act like a Malfoy. I am Draco Malfoy. I am a pure-blood. That's all that matters.

I get up, massaging the back of my neck where I slept on it at an odd angle. Granger stands over me, a glass of juice and a muffin in her hand. 

"I thought you might want these," she says, smiling shyly. "You slept through breakfast and class starts in 15 minutes."

I don't need her sympathy.

"I don't take anything from filthy mudbloods," I state monotonously, swallowing the lump in my throat.

I have to keep my guard up. I must not show emotion. Emotion is a sign of weakness. She can use it against me.

"Again with that word?" she snaps. "Are you a broken record or something?"

I turn to look at her, eyes bright, cheeks flushed. She looks... angry, passionate, blazing. Beautiful.

I can't think that. Father would kill me. Even though I'm already dead inside.

I open my mouth and shut it a few times, probably looking like a fish out of water. Then, without thinking about the words, they tumble out of my mouth.

"I have to hate you," I say weakly, not meeting her eyes.

"Why?" she asks softly. 

I don't answer for a few minutes, and she waits patiently.

"We're going to be late for class," I say feebly. 

"We've got 12 minutes," she says calmly. "Enough time for you to answer the question and for us to get to Transfiguration with time to spare. So," she starts, leaning against the armchair. "Tell me, why do you have to hate me?"

I never realised how tired she looks until now. She has only been 'pregnant' for a day, but already she looks worn out. Was that my doing?

No. I don't care. She is a mudblood. She is scum. I am Draco Malfoy. I am a pureblood. That is all that matters.

"I meant that it is impossible not to hate you," I say coldly, shooting her a disgusted look. "After all, look at you!" 

She glances down at herself, seeming deflated by my comment. All the fight leaves her, and she sags. I almost want to take it back, but I don't. She seems like she's holding back tears, and she hugs herself tightly. 

She is thin. Thinner than when I last saw her. Has she been eating properly?

"Well, I'll just leave you to hate me then," she says stiffly, composing herself. Then, she wallks out of the apartment. 

I feel empty when she's gone. I run a hand through my hair, confused. Why do I feel guilty for hurting her feelings? Should I?

I need to think. But I also need to get to class. I debate skipping class again, but decide against it. I need to keep my grades up.

So, I walk to class, passing several abandoned classrooms on the way. There are less students this year. I don't want to think about why. 

But when I do, my breathing gets heavier and faster simultaneously. I feel trapped in this huge school, and overwhelmed by its vastness at the same time. I need to breathe.

I stumble into one of the classrooms, taking deep breaths to try to calm my breathing. After my heart rate slows, does it occur to me to check that I am alone.

I'm not.

Cho Chang sits in a corner, staring into space. She doesn't seem to notice me, and I slowly slink out of the classroom. 

She doesn't come to Transfiguration. 

Hermione doesn't look at me all lesson.

At lunch, I see all of the 'couples' sitting with each other, except me and Granger and Cho and Weasel. 

Weasel looks disgusted with Cho. He looks at her like she is a venomous snake. He makes visible effort to keep his distance from her, as if she will infect him. It can't still be because of that whole business with Umbridge, can it?

That's when I realise. That's how I act towards Granger. Snooty and superior and cruel. 

Cruel.

I am Draco Malfoy. I am cruel. 

I see Granger also looking at Weasel, her exasperation with him evident. Then, she gets up and walks over to sit next to Cho.

Weasel stops chewing. I pick up my fork, trying not to make it obvious that I'm watching them. Granger says something that causes Cho to give a small smile. 

They chatter for the whole of lunch, and it seems to do them both a world of good. Just as I am looking at them enviously, someone comes to sit by me. 

Astoria Greengrass.

She smiles timidly, her brown hair tied back with a yellow and black scrunchie. Typical Hufflepuff colours. 

"Can I sit here?" she asks, as if we are old friends. 

I am too stunned to say anything, so I just nod. She sets her tray down next to me. She doesn't attempt to talk to me, instead choosing to let us fall into a comfortable silence. Her very presence comforts me. 

But I notice something.

Granger doesn't eat a single bit of food.

A/N: Hi, sorry I haven't updated in what feels like ages! I haven't been in the mood to continue writing this, but I'm excited about where it's going to go! I have a plan, but I'm taking it slowly, and trying to develop relationships as much as possible. I know there's not a lot of dialogue or Dramione action... but it's coming soon! Please just stick with this for a while, it will get more interesting! I want to really give an insight into the characters' thoughts and feelings, and what might be going through their minds... I hope that's ok!

Thank you so so so much for reading!

Lots of love

Saf xx