I SAID I NEEDED SPACE~ CHAPTER 13:

~~ Billie & Michael ~~

INTRO:

"Bil," I say to her "What's wrong," I ask

"Micheal and I broke up last night" she musters slowly

"What?" I say and she looks down

"We haven't been happy. I haven't been happy" she replies

"Billie, why didn't you tell me?" I ask her

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We pull up to the shopping strip and load the kids out of the car. Billie seems down to me and I can't figure out why. Her eyes are red which means she has been crying. I run every possible scenario through my head, but I don't seem to come up with a reasonable answer.

We find a little restaurant that the kids want to eat at, and we find a table inside. The restaurant has a kids area, so we let them off to release their energy. I make sure that they are in my direct eye view so no other accidents can happen again.

We can see them from our table on the little playground and the colouring station. Jackson and Ava are babbling and Saskia is off to the side. She has begun to develop a little attitude, and it's cute until she is screaming, yelling no, and throwing tantrums in a public place.

The waitress comes and drops off a few menus, for Billie and me and a kids menu for us to order off of, and we order water for the table.

I troll through the menu and order Saskia and Ava a portion of chicken and chips, with steamed veggies from the kid's menu to share, and myself a grilled chicken salad. I wait for Billie to order herself something and Jackson something. We hand the menus to the waitress, which she takes before she stalks off to send the order to the kitchen.

I clear my throat and Billie takes a sip of her water. She looks up at me and I look at her for a quick second before I see her eyes we'll, with tears streaming down her face. I look at her shocked and she puts her head in her hands, as she begins to sob. I scoot around the booth and pull her into my arms and I let her cry. She cries until she can't anymore, and I release her when her sniffles cease.

I hand her a napkin and she wipes her face.

"Bil," I say to her "What's wrong," I ask

"Micheal and I broke up last night" she musters slowly and my mouth drops open.

"What?" I say and she looks down

"We haven't been happy. I haven't been happy" she replies

"Billie, why didn't you tell me?" I ask her and grab ahold of her hand giving it a small squeeze

"You have been so busy being a single mum to the girls, I didn't want to burden you with my problems," she says to me and I instantly feel guilty. I have been so busy in my life and my problems I haven't seen that my best friend is struggling.

"Oh my god, Billie... I am so sorry" I say

"No don't be sorry" she replies

"Tell me everything," I say to her.

She explains to me how unhappy she has been in her relationship, how she works to pay their bills and buy groceries whilst Michael spends all of their money on Friday nights with the boys, how he has cut down most of his days at work. How she feels like a single mother. She cries telling me that she can't do it anymore.

Billie tells me that everything she taught Micahel was, was a lie. That everything he did when the project first started was an act. He said he doesn't want this life, he wants to be a teenager and have fun. Not having to work and take care of kids and a wife.

"He doesn't want a ball and chain attached to him any longer," she says and I am shocked

"Billie, I can't believe this" I reply

"I know," she says back to me

"I'm so sorry," I say again "What can I do?"

"Nothing Aves, if he doesn't want this life, then I don't want him around me or my kids" she replies and I hug her again

"It's going to be okay," I say "I know it must be the worst pain in your life, but you will get through it" I reply and she smiles sadly

"I know I'll get through it... I really thought he was the one" she says

"I'm here for you Bil, whatever you need" I reply

"Thanks, Aves, I just need my kids, and our little family together, and some time to heal"

"Okay, we can do that," I say to her and she smiles "Do Jake and Ally know?" I ask as we'll

"No, I was going to tell them tonight, since Michael will not be moving in with us next month," she says and I nod, and realise that we are moving into our house next month. I completely forgot about this.

We move on to talk about what they did last night before I interrupt her

"Billie," I say

"Mhm" she replies

"Never hold out on me again, no matter what. I am your best friend and I want to be there with you when you are unhappy"

"I will Avery"

"Promise?" I ask her and she laughs

"Of course," she says and at this moment our waitress returns to our table with the food, so we get busy getting the kids situated and eating, where I have full control of both the girls and Jackson.

After they finish eating, we let them go back to playing whilst Billie and I get the chance to eat. By the time we are done, it is almost Ava and Jackson's nap time so we quickly pass through the grocery store to get food for dinner before we make it home just in time to put the kids to bed.

Jamie is at school, so Saskia is the only one awake when we get home. She has been resistant to taking naps during the day so I have been letting her stay up with me. It has been okay so far, but she is far more tired at night time than she used to be.

When we get home I walk in before Billie to check for Michael, once I call out for him and get no response I signal for Billie to come in. We put both kids to bed in their room. Saskia and I help Billie load the groceries in the house, and whilst she puts them away I sit down with Saskia and we read a story together, so we get a little bonding time.

We read through a couple of books before she gets bored so we do some colouring together, which is the time we really practice the alphabet, colours and counting. She learns this stuff at her daycare too but I want to encourage her to learn as much as she can now.

By the time she is occupied by herself and doesn't want to play with me anymore, it is time to pick Jamie up from school so Billie heads off to get her, and I begin to prepare dinner.

Lucky for me as soon as Billie leaves, the 2 kids napping decide to wake up, so I get them out of bed, and they are grumpy, but I am saved by Jake, Ally and their 3 kids. They arrive right on time so all of our kids get the time to play, and I get to see my baby.

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