Word Count: 1835

~Sienna

Dawn light chases me across the dewy lawn, my breath clouding in front of me.

A figure lurks exactly where we always meet. Their shoulders are hunched, one hand in their pocket, their other holding whatever they are smoking.

"I'm surprised you came," I note as I approach.

One last glance back at the manor shows I'm not being followed. Everyone is still snoozing, giving me a small window of time to meet with this man.

His hood casts a shadow over his face, concealing an identity I know too well. He only does it in case someone finds us here, which is very possible.

He takes a long drag of his cigarette. "Why wouldn't I?"

"The last time you didn't." I rub my arms. I'm cold, despite my coat. "You have no reason to fear Onyx."

This man, Tom, and I have been meeting for years. After my mother died, he got in touch, being the only reminder of my dark, terrible childhood.

The problem is, to keep my secret, I need him.

"That isn't entirely true," he notes.

"He wouldn't hurt someone close to me," I insist. It would take some convincing, but Onyx would spare anyone if I demanded it fervently enough.

"Are we close?" He asks gruffly.

I scrunch my nose up at the bitter smell he's puffing out. "You're the only person left from my childhood who I trust. That's as close as it gets."

"What do you need?" He cuts straight to the chase.

"Someone left a note on my vanity the other morning," I say lowly, as if someone my be lurking at the edge of the property, hoping to overhear us. "They threatened me to tell my secret or they would do it for me."

Tom straightens, officially intrigued. "Who?"

"I don't know. I was hoping you did."

For my own safety and his, I haven't seen his face in years. He keeps an eye on me, on the comings and goings of this place that may affect me. Unfortunately he wasn't present at Maren's to warn me about Zion's presence.

That was an interaction I really wish I could have avoided...

"I haven't spoken to anyone about you, Sienna," he informs me.

I shift from foot to foot, hating that my shoes are already damp from the dew.

"Well, there's no chance anyone else knows on my end. I never even think about this, let alone talk about it." This is the first time this issue has flared up for a while.

"Zion may have sent someone," he mutters gruffly.

I close my eyes, trying to calm myself.

Zion isn't just Onyx's enemy. It's worse than that. What my friend doesn't know is that I'm connected to Zion in a way that has cursed me forever.

He's my father.

Years ago, my father hurt my mother. Badly. He almost killed her, and to save me, my mother plucked me out of my bed one stormy night and had the man in front of me smuggle us out of the Pack.

With no skills, she showed up at Onyx's estate when his mother was ruling alone, hoping her knowledge of how manor's run would be enough to secure a job.

By some mercy, my mother wasn't recognised and she was hired.

After that, she warned me never to speak about the secret, no matter how close I became with Lucia or Onyx. If they knew...I don't even want to think about it.

"It's likely he did send someone. He recognised me recently but didn't mention it," I bring up.

Zion knew it was me. He looked his own daughter in his eyes and threatened her life.

He could have sold me out. I've done such a good job of avoiding him all these years, as I always suspected he would reclaim me.

Clearly he has a far greater plan in motion for me.

"He has something planned. That's why," Tom says, voicing my concerns exactly.

"Onyx can't know. If he did, he'd kill me."

He wouldn't actually kill me, but the level of betrayal would be unbelievable. He trusts me so deeply, and I'm keeping this secret from him.

It's just be so long that I can't just tell him now. He would never forgive me.

"What would you like me do to?" Tom asks.

"Keep an eye on who is coming and going from this place. I have some names I would like you to do a background check on," I say lowly, digging into my pocket for the list.

It's mostly some new staff members and all the girls and their escorts. Kayn's name is in there too, which feels wrong, but I need to be entirely sure no one knows my true identity.

He takes it from me, rolling it up into my hands. "Done."

"I may be moving soon, so none of this may matter," I add lowly.

Running from Onyx for this reason isn't good, but it might just work. If I force some distance between us, I won't come across Zion again, and Onyx won't get hurt because of my relationship to his enemy.

"I get the feeling Zion will not forget about you so soon." Tom sounds apprehensive.

"As long as I'm far enough away from being able to be used against Onyx, all is fine," I mutter, leaning back against the trunk of a tree.

Some days I wish I could sink into the forest and never come out again.

"Then I suggest moving soon. This note indicates you're in danger."

"I know...I'll talk to you soon."

I don't look back as I stride across the lawn. Morning fog crawls across the flat grounds, wrapping around the house ominously. Being out at this hour is more haunting than I imagined.

My attempts to get back to to my room aren't thwarted until I'm at my door.

"Sienna?" Kayn is there, leaning against the wall like he came to talk to me and was building up the courage to knock.

I frown. It's so early. Does he often come to my room and lurk like this?

"I was just out for a walk. Couldn't sleep," I say, shrugging my thick coat off.

"It's dangerous out there. Where is your guard?" He questions, looking over my shoulder then back down the other way of the hallway.

Being that I'm a mistress now, I have a personal guard, although he's become so accustomed to my ordinary life that he doesn't post up in front of my door very often.

If he did, he may have caught who left the note in my room.

"Asleep. I'm fine, seriously. I've been doing this forever," I brush him off, entering my room, placing my coat on its hook before I kick off my boots.

Honestly I want to crawl back under the covers and get a few more hours sleep. This ordeal has exhausted me.

"You should be more careful. It makes me uncomfortable thinking about you out there." Kayn follows me in, radiating tension.

"Kayn, I'm fine," I mutter, rubbing a hand down my face. "Why are you even here?"

"I'll be honest, I've been coming to your room at times because I noticed the absence of your guard. It makes me more comfortable knowing someone is looking out for you," he says, rolling his shoulders.

I frown. What a bizarre reason. Does he think I'm in danger?

"You've been coming to my room?"

"I knock sometimes and you never answers. I worry." He rubs the back of his neck. Something about his tone conveys that he thinks he's doing the right thing, that this is admirable.

Frankly, it's kind of creepy.

"I could have just been sleeping all those times?" I remind him bluntly.

"It seems you have a proclivity for late night wandering. I wanted to make sure you're okay."

I rest my palm against my forehead. I'm far too tired for this conversation. I'll deal with this when I wake at a more normal hour.

"I'm going to head to bed. I'm pretty tired."

My manoeuvre to walk around him is cut off as he steps in front of me. "Can I join you?"

"No...I mean, I need sleep."

"I'll be honest, I'm very attracted to you. It's getting to the point it's hard to look at you without...you know." He shifts like he's the one who has the right to be uncomfortable right now.

"No?"

Before I even have a chance to blink he strides forward and grabs either side of my face, pressing his lips to mine.

The force of the kiss has me backing up a step. He kisses me like he he wants it to hurt, his fingers digging into my cheeks.

I push him off, overwhelmed by the pressure of his kiss, at how eager he feels to get his tongue into my mouth.

"Kayn..." I wipe my mouth.

"Come up to my room instead. I'll take really good care of you," he offers, his smile devilish.

Maybe it's my inexperience, or maybe I'm just tired, but the feeling immediately repulses me. I'm not ready to have sex with Kayn. In fact, it hasn't really crossed my mind.

"Not now," I insist irritably.

"Why not?" He keeps trying to grab my wrist, but I continuously brush him off.

"I'm tired."

He sighs through his nose, like my rejection is bothering him. He grabs my waist and tries to pull me into another kiss, but I shove him off.

It's not like he's drunk. Why is he acting like this?

"I said I'm tired," I snap, my voice echoing around my room. I hope it doesn't wake anyone slumbering nearby. This isn't something I want people to be gossiping about.

Kayn backs up a step, digging his fingers into his hair, clutching his strands so tightly I feel myself worrying for their integrity.

"For fucks sake Sienna," he growls under his breath, like resisting me is taking a physical toll on him that he isn't willing to endure.

"What?" Hurt blooms in my chest.

"Nothing, I'm sorry." He puts some distant between us, realising he's made a mistake. "I'm out of my mind."

"I'm just not ready," I exclaim calmly, even though repulsion still echoes through me.

Did he really think he could force himself on me? Is it that hard for him to wait?

"Of course not. I understand."

I frown. "Do you?"

"I better go." He barely gives me another glance, bounding up the stairs, leaving behind the awkward encounter that just occured.

I watch him go, releasing a long breath.

What am I doing?

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~Midika 💜🐼