Halos mangadapa si Moira sa paglakad-takbo sa subdivision. She was trembling in fear. Paano kung bigla na lamang kunin ni Vince si Kelvin? What would her life be like? She's been through a lot for her son. She was already too attached to let anyone take him away.

Dire-diretso siyang pumasok sa gate at patakbong binuksan ang front door. Tumambad sa kanya ang mag-ama, nasa tigkabilang dulo ng hagdan. Vince is looking up and Kelvin's staring him down. When she opened the door, their attentions diverted to her.

"Mommy!" tawag sa kanya ni Kelvin. Dali-dali itong bumaba ng hagdan at patakbong yumakap sa kanya.

Vince looks confounded. Pabalik-balik ang tingin nito sa kanya at kay Kelvin. At mas lalo itong nalito nang biglang dumating si Neri.

"Why did you get out of your room?" tanong nito kay Kelvin. Dinama ni Neri ang noo ng pamangkin. "Are you feeling okay?"

"I was thirsty," he answered. Tumingin itong muli kay Vince. He was also frowning. Mukhang nalilito ang mag-ama sa nangyayari. "Mommy, who's he?"

Vince looked at her, taunting her to answer the question.

She cupped Kelvin's face and smiled. "Baby, go with Tita Neri muna, okay? I'll join you later."

Sumunod naman kaagad si Kelvin sa kanya. Nang nasa kusina na ang mag-tita ay saka niya hinarap si Vince, na noon ay hindi pa rin gumagalaw mula sa kinatatayuan nito kanina.

Huminga siya ng malalim.

"Would you like to sit down?"

Ipinamay-awang nito ang isang kamay at saka ipinangsabunot naman sa ulo ang kabila. He huffed, his eyebrows furrowed. She could see his knuckles turning white. Parang malapit na itong sumabog. And when he does, she'll be the only casualty.

Humakbang ito palapit sa kanya. He looks like he wants to strangle her.

"Anak mo?" punong-puno ng pang-uuyam nitong tanong. She could almost hear the underlying anger in his tone. It made her shake in fear.

Nang tumango siya ay nagtiim ang bagang nito. He exhaled again, para bang naglalabas ng galit. He kept his hands to his sides, fists tightly clenched. Alam niyang kung nagkataong hindi siya babae, baka kanina pa siya nito nasuntok.

"Is it true that you've never been with anyone else?"

She shook her head this time.

"How old is he?"

"He's turning ten this December," mahina niyang sagot.

His face became pale, as if reality had finally sank in. Naupo ito. She sat on a separate chair and just waited for him to say something. Napatingin silang pareho sa kusina nang lumabas sina Neri at Kelvin.

Inihatid ni Neri ang anak niya sa kwarto nito. Neri stayed upstairs, so she had no help at all. And maybe that's just how it's supposed to be. She needs to face him alone, because it's her fault anyway. Everything stemmed out from the decision she made that night, ten years ago.

"He looks just like me when I was about his age," kumento nito.

"Vince, I—"

Vince exhaled sharply again.

"Save your overdue explanation for some other time, Moira. I have to go before I strangle you," kalmado pero buong diin nitong sabi. She guessed that he finally gained back his strength because he was already able to stand up. Tumayo na rin siya at sinundan ito palabas ng bahay.

"Vince—"

He turned at the mention of his name. Tumuro ito sa kanya, his eyes burning.

"If you ever as much try to hide him from me again, then I swear that I'll not leave a stone unturned until I find him. And it will be worse for you," he threatened.

She realized that she was still shaking from what happened. Na para bang panandalian lang na nakaramdam ng ginhawa ang baga niya nang makaalis si Vince. Alam niyang mabait ito at responsable, pero alam din niyang may limitasyon ang kaalaman niyang iyon. She doesn't really know what he's like under extreme circumstances like this, and she doesn't want to find out.

He had the right to know, anyway, and she took it from him. Kung sana ay hindi sya natakot na maranasan ng anak ang naranasan niya dati kay Vince, then it wouldn't be as complicated.

Huminga siya ng malalim at saka muling pumasok sa bahay. Umakyat siya at tinungo ang kwarto ni Kelvin. Naabutan niyang binabasahan ni Neri ng manga ang pamangkin. Tutok ang dalawa sa hawak ni Neri na libro. They only stopped when they saw her.

Agad na bumangon si Neri at nilapitan siya.

"Ano'ng nangyari?" pabulong nitong tanong.

"I'll tell you later."

"Are you okay?" Hinawakan siya nito sa braso. "Nanginginig ka."

She gave her cousin a tight smile. "Yeah. He's that scary."

"Kung kailangan mo ng kausap, I'll just be in my room, okay?"

Tumango siya. "Thanks, Neri."

Nang lumabas ng kwarto ang pinsan ay nilapitan naman nya ang anak na kanina pa nawiwirduhan sa ikinikilos niya. Kelvin just seem to know if there's anything wrong around him. At alam niyang hindi na naman siya nito titigilan ng katatanong.

"How's your head?" she asked. Saka niya dinama ang noo nito.

"Heavy," he answered. "Mommy, who was that man? He told me that his name is Vince. Is he courting you? Di ba I told you already not to accept suitors? What if daddy comes back?" sunod-sunod nitong tanong.

She sighed. Hindi na niya alam kung paano magpapaliwanag.

"He's not a suitor, baby."

"Then why did he bring flowers?"

"I... it's..." Napakamot siya sa ulo. "Basta. He's not a siutor."

"Then what is he to you?"

Nginitian niya ito at saka pinisil ang ilong. "Ang dami mo namang tanong. Tell you what. Magpagaling ka muna and then I'll answer all your questions, okay?"

"But mommy—"

"And then we'll buy ice cream," she promised.

Ngumuso ito. "You're always bribing me with ice cream. But okay."

Hinalikan niya ito sa noo. "Thanks, baby. Mommy needs to rest now. Ikaw rin, magpahinga ka muna."

Lumabas siya ng kwarto nito at saka tinungo ang sarili niyang kwarto. She's too shaken up to sleep. She didn't know that Vince could scare her that much. Mas nakakatakot pala yung mga taong nagpipigil ng outburst. It's like they would implode any minute.

Bumuntong-hininga siya. She still needs to face him tomorrow. And she's sure that he won't just let her go without knowing everything. Sampung taon din 'yon. It's not going to get okay in a few days.

Frustrated, she shut her eyes and forced herself to sleep.

--

Vince was driving blindly. He was so angry with Moira. Angry for not telling him about their son, angry for keeping so much secret and angry for not trusting him enough. After what they've shared in Newark, he thought that it was all going to be better. Uphill na kumbaga. Well, everything came crashing down the next day, unfortunately.

He was still in shock to find out that he has a son. For ten years, wala syang kaalam-alam. And he didn't know becase he made himself think that he doesn't care about her, that she's not supposed to be in his life so he shut her out.

And the worst part is, she also shut him out. It's clear that Kelvin doesn't know him. He doubts that she told their son anything about him. What was she trying to do? Raise their son alone? Deal with him in his adolescence alone? Did she really think that she could go through it alone?

Oh, right, she has Joem. What the fuck is really going on? There are so many questions that need answers. Gusto sana niyang malaman lahat, but it was too overwhelming. Iyon nga lang malaman niyang may anak na pala sya, it almost drove him mad. Paano pa kaya kapag nalaman nya pa 'yong iba?

He can't absorb it all on one day. He needs to recollect himself first.

"Rose," bungad niya nang matawagan ang assistant.

"Hey! Pauwi ka na? What happened?"

"Mag-out ka na. I'll meet you outside the building."

"What? Bakit?"

"I'll be there in ten minutes." Pagkasabi'y tinapos na niya ang tawag.

Nang makarating siya sa office ay nasa labas na ng building si Rose. So hindi na siya lumabas ng kotse. Pagkakita nito sa sasakyan ay agad itong lumapit patungo roon. She opened the passenger's seat and climbed in.

"What's wrong? You're scowling," puna nito.

"I'll tell you later."

He drove off to a bar nearby. Wala pang alas sais so alam niyang wala pang masyadong tao sa pupuntahan nila. After parking the car in front of the said establishment, tahimik lang siyang sinundan ni Rose papasok sa loob.

Lilima pa lamang yata ang tao sa loob noon. And it's just what he needed.

He ordered two drinks and handed the other to Rose.

"I'm breastfeeding," she pointed out. "Baka malasing ang baby ko."

"Good. More for me." He drank the liquor in two searing, huge gulps and then he ordered another one.

"Wait. Kumain ka na ba? Maglalasing ka na naman, ni hindi ka pa yata kumakain. Makakasama 'yan sa 'yo."

"Shut up."

She pressed her lips together. "Vince, what the hell happened?"

"I have a son," he said curtly. He told the bartender to keep the drinks coming, para kapag nakaubos siya ng isa, may isa kaagad siyang tutunggain.

"A what? Wait, slow down!" Kinuha nito mula sa kamay niya ang alak. But the bartender just gave him another one. Rose glared at the guy and shook her head. "Kumalma ka nga sa pag-inom."

"I have a son," pag-uulit niya. "I have a fucking son, Rose! So don't tell me to calm down!"

"All the more reason for you to calm down, Vince."

Napahilamos siya ng mukha. He knows what she meant by that. And she's right. She's absolutely right, just like always.

He ran his fingers through his hair and gave her a desperate look.

"What should I do, Rose?"

"Kung sasabihin ko ba, susundin mo?"

"Kailan ba kita hindi sinunod?" pabalik niyang tanong.

Bumuntong-hininga ito. "Stop drinking. Hindi ka makakapag-isip ng matino kapag ganyan."

Tumango siya. He took out his wallet and pulled a few bills. Saka siyang umalis. Rose told him to go to a restaurant. Nang makahanap ito ng gustong kainan ay doon sila pumarada. She made him order food and told him to eat. Saka siya nito pinagkwento.

He began telling her about Kelvin and how he found out about him. How all the things just... fit.

"He looks just like me," he told her.

"And he's already turning ten pero ngayon mo lang nalaman?"

"Yeah. Damning, isn't it?"

"Well, if you're to go back ten years ago, you're not exactly nice to Moira. Kaya siguro nang may mabuo, natakot syang ipaalam sa 'yo thinking that you'll just reject her again."

"But he's my son too. I have the right to know."

"But you didn't exactly have to know right away," she told him. "What did she say? Na-explain ba kung bakit nya tinago?"

Umiling siya. "I was so angry with her. Umalis na lang ako bago pa ako makapanakit."

"Hindi ka naman nananakit e."

"You don't know how it felt like. Nagdidilim na ang paningin ko kanina."

"But you still managed to control yourself."

"It was overwhelming, Rose."

"I understand, Vince. But you will have to face her again tomorrow. So I suggest na pakalmahin mo 'yang sarili mo. She's probably so scared of you right now. Huwag mo nang dagdagan pa ang takot nya."

Alam naman niya iyon. He scared the hell out of Moira earlier. And he knew that he shouldn't have threatened her. Maybe she just did what she had to do. He just couldn't accept the fact that she had to exclude him in the process of it, completely.

--

The next day, Moira mustered her courage to go to work and face Vince again. She knows that Rose already knew. Mukhang wala namang isinisikreto si Vince dito. Rose gave her a sympathetic smile as she settled in her cubicle.

"I heard," pabulong nitong sabi. "Don't worry, I'm not judging you."

"Thanks, Rose. Si Vince?"

"Nasa kabilang kumpanya. Mamayang hapon sya rito." She touched her arm. "Okay ka lang ba?"

She breathed. "Medyo okay na."

"You know that you have a lot of explaining to do, right?"

Tumango siya. "Sasabihin ko naman sa kanya lahat kapag kaya nya nang tumanggap ng paliwanag."

And she meant that. No more hiding. Sawang-sawa na rin siya sa pagsisinungaling. And Vince might hate her after that, but after everything that's happened, she felt like it's a much needed turning point in her life. Kailangan niya ng bagong simula, at hindi iyon mangyayari kung wala siyang tatapusin. The lying will stop and then she'll see how it goes from there.

"Nga pala, Red told me that she needs to see you in her office. Urgent daw."

"You didn't tell her, did you?"

Rose smiled and shook her head. "No. It's not my place to disclose that."

She thanked Rose and headed to Red's office. Dumiretso na siya sa loob since wala si Vico sa pwesto nito.

"Red? You wanted to see me?"

"Carlene! Come in."

She went in and sat on a chair.

"Hanggang kelan ka rito?" Red asked.

"Baka hanggang bukas na lang. Bakit?"

"Well, Vico's resigning na kasi. Tatapusin lang nya itong buwan na 'to. And I was hoping that you'd be interested in replacing him. The salary's not as big, pero it's a stable job. Under probation ka lang for a few months and then, regular ka na agad."

"Red, that's—I-I have to think about it."

Pinagdaop nito ang mga palad. She gave her a pleading look.

"Please, Carlene? Nandito ka na rin lang naman e. At least I already know you, hindi na ako mangangapa. I don't want a stranger to be my assistant."

"I promise I'll think about it." If things went well with Vince, then she'll consider the job offer. If not? Well, hindi na niya alam ang gagawin. Ipinagdarasal na lamang niya na sana ay hindi na umabot sa korte ang problema.