“So, what time should we come to your house tonight Connor?” Blake asked me the next day as we ate breakfast.

                “You guys are going to Connor’s house?” Tammy asked curiously as she set down a plate of pancakes for us.

                Luka nodded happily. He was sitting in my lap, his hair slightly messy since we had just rolled out of bed. Mine wasn’t much better.

                “Yea! It’s exciting!” he said.

                I ran my hands through his hair, trying to fix it for him. He giggled and kissed me. I smiled and continued to play with his soft hair.

                “You boys haven’t hung out at Connor’s house in a long time,” Tammy said, smiling at us. “Well, I hope you have fun.”

                “So, what time?” Blake asked me.

                “After dinner,” I said. I would need that much time to come up with a reasonable excuse for them to not actually come over.

                “Oh, a sleepover?” Luka asked curiously, cocking his head to the side.

                I shrugged nervously. “Sure,” I said.

                “Awesome. How about we go there at seven?” Blake offered.

                I nodded at him. That would give me plenty of time to come up with some excuse. Maybe I could tell them that when I got home, I found my mother dead on the ceiling of my nursery and then she burst into flames and the house burnt down.

                …I really need to stop watching Supernatural.

                “Connor, aren’t you going to eat?” Luka asked, frowning.

                I shook my head at him. “No, I’m not really hungry,” I mumbled. When I got nervous, it threw my stomach off. And I was nervous as hell right no-

                BOOM. IDEA.

                I would just pretend I had thrown up when I got home. Unoriginal, but oh so effective. And I could play it up a little now.

                “Are you sure?” His frown got even deeper.

                “My stomach’s just a little off right now. I’ll be fine Luka. If I get hungry, I’ll tell you,” I said, offering him a small smile and praying that my stomach wouldn’t give me away.

                “Okay,” he said, kissing me again before beginning to eat. Blake was watching me suspiciously, probably guessing what I was up to.

                I waited until they were done eating. Luka jumped up and put our dishes away before coming over to me and pulling me to my feet.

                “Let’s do something fun!” Luka said, bouncing up and down eagerly.

                “Oh Luka. Connor, don’t let him go bouncing through the ceiling,” Tammy said with a sigh, watching her son as he continued his bouncing.

                I put my hands on Luka’s shoulders, holding him down. He pouted at us. He looked up at me, letting his bottom lip jut out.

                “Baby, please let me bounce,” he whimpered.

                I hesitated before sighing and releasing my grip on his shoulders. Luka let out a happy yell and began to bounce again, grabbing my hands as he did so.

                “Whipped,” Felix said, disguising it as a cough.

                “I am not!” I whined.

                “Connor, will you give me a piggy back?” Luka asked, using the Voice.

                “Fine, I’m whipped. I admit it. Shit Luka, why don’t you just make me get a sex change while you’re at it?” I turned so that he could jump on my back.

                “Bad, bad, bad Connor! Bad language!” Luka said sternly, whacking me in the back of the head.

                “Luka! He already said his stomach was off, don’t give him a headache to go with it,” Tammy said, shaking her head at Luka.

                “But mom! Connor used bad language! I am not kissing a potty mouth.” Luka was back to pouting.

                “Sorry, sorry. I’ll watch my language,” I said, tilting his head and kissing him deeply.

                Luka smiled and nodded in approval. “Good. To the living room!”

                He turned, grabbing Blake’s hand and pulling him to the living room. Felix and I chuckled and followed them into the living room, dropping on the couches.

                We played on Luka’s Nintendo64 for a while. I kept reminding myself to act like my condition was getting worse.

                “Connor, are you okay? You don’t look too good,” Luka said, reaching over and brushing my hair out of my face.

                I caught his hand with mine and shrugged. “I’m okay. My stomach is just bothering me. I’ll head home soon and just lay down for a little before you guys come over. I’ll be fine.”

                “Yea, I think we all better head home soon so we can shower before we head over to Connor’s house,” Blake said, stretching and giving me a pleasant smile.

                “Okay,” Luka said, turning the game off.

                We gathered our stuff and Luka walked us out to our cars. He grabbed my hand as Felix and Blake got in Blake’s car together.

                “I love you Connor,” Luka said, smiling and kissing me. “I can’t wait for tonight! I miss hanging out at your house. It was always so much fun.”

                “And it’ll be fun tonight,” I said, pulling him into a hug. I made my arms tremble lightly as I held him. Luka knew that when I got physically ill, my body, especially my arms, trembled. It would be more believable for him when I told him.

                “Your arms are shaking,” he said, frowning as he pulled away.

                “I’m cold,” I said, kissing his forehead. “Don’t worry about it.” I kissed his nose. “I love you, and I’ll see you at seven.” I kissed his lips.

                He smiled at me and waved as I got into my car. I waved back before pulling out of his driveway and making my way home.

                When I got home, I let myself inside. I went upstairs and glanced over, seeing my parents cuddled on the couch watching a movie together and talking.

                “Well, your mother invited us for breakfast on Sunday,” my mom was saying.

                “Did she? That’s good. Did she say if my nephew will have his kids there?” he asked.

                Mom shook her head. “No, she didn’t say. I hope he does, though. Those kids are adorable. It makes me wish we had kids.”

                I swallowed the lump in my throat, dropping my head and hurrying into my bedroom. I shut the door and slid down against it, putting my face in my hands and trying to breathe evenly.

                Had Blake been right? Had I just fucked him to feel noticed?

                No…No, I wasn’t that cruel of a person. That heartless. Was I? No. I had honestly had feelings for Blake when we had first started the affair.

                I forced myself to stand up. I moved over to my bed and collapsed on it, fighting back my feelings. Rage, hate, jealousy, loneliness, and depression.

                “Luka,” I whispered to myself, squeezing my eyes shut. “It doesn’t matter. I still have Luka. I won’t let myself lose Luka. I can’t focus on what I’ve already lost. I have to think of what I haven’t.”

                I sighed and grabbed a book. I let myself get lost in reading for about two hours before setting the book down, feeling slightly better.

                I dialed Luka’s number, holding the phone to my ear. I waited patiently as the phone rang, mentally plotting how to make my voice sound for this.

                “Connor!” Luka answered happily. “Hi Connor!”

                “Luka,” I croaked. “Hey, I’m sorry.”

                “Sorry for what?” No more happiness, only intense concern. “Are you okay?”

                “Yea. I just…I don’t think you guys should come over today. I just threw up,” I lied.

                “Aw Connor! That’s why your stomach was off. And, oh! Your arms were shaking. I forgot that happens when you get sick. Gosh Connor, I’m sorry. I hope you feel better,” he said sincerely.

                “Thanks Luka. I’m going to call Felix and Blake so they know. I’m really sorry. I wanted to hang out with you guys. Maybe another time,” I said.

                “Don’t worry about it Connor! Just rest and get better. I love you,” Luka said.

                “I love you too Luka. Bye.” I hung up the phone, calling and repeating a similar conversation with Felix before dialing Blake’s number.

                “Hello?”

                “Blake? Hey, we can’t hang out at my house tonight. I just threw up,” I croaked.

                “Connor Garret Brennan lying? To me? Well, what else is new?” Blake asked with a sigh.

                “Yea, I’m lying. And you know why I’m lying. I’ll keep lying, if it keeps you all out of my house and away from my parents,” I said flatly.

                “You know, everyone thinks you’re this honest guy. We were best friends, and I thought you were the most honest person I knew. But you’re tangled in a web of lies Connor. It’s only a matter of time before Luka finds out the truth about everything,” Blake snarled.

                “And then what, Blake?” I asked.

                “Then you’re alone,” he said smugly.

                “And so are you. You really think Luka will forgive you so easily? You’ll lose him too, Blake. We’ll both lose Luka and Felix. You’ll destroy Luka if you tell him. Is that what you want?”

                “I’ll do anything to get revenge on you Connor. Nothing could ever hurt as much as losing you did,” he said coldly before hanging up.

                I tossed my phone away from me and laid down, glaring at my ceiling. My doorbell rang and I sighed in annoyance and got up.

                I left my bedroom and looked around, not seeing my mom or dad. I think I remembered hearing the garage door open and shut about a half hour ago. They must have gone out to dinner together.

                After quickly running through the house to make sure they were really gone, I went down and pulled the front door open. I stared in surprise.

                “Luka!” I said, miraculously remembering to make my voice sound sick and weak.

                “No offense, but you sound awful,” Luka said, smiling lightly. “I came to make sure you were okay.”

                “You really shouldn’t be here Luka. You might get sick too,” I said, beyond relieved that my mom and dad weren’t here.

                “I’ve already been kissing you today. If you’ve got something contagious, I have it too,” he said, his smile getting a little bigger. “So I’m not afraid.”

                I sighed and stepped aside, letting him into the house. “I don’t think I have anything contagious. We were snacking on Oreos last night, and you know how those make me sick. Maybe that was it.”

                You’re tangled in a web of lies, Connor.

                I shook Blake’s words out of my head as I walked with Luka to my bedroom. I laid on my bed and he cuddled next to me, running his hand through my hair.

                “Tell me if you feel like you’re going to be sick again,” he said, kissing my cheek.

                “I’ll be okay Luka,” I said, wrapping my arms around him and pulling him closer to me. “I actually feel a little better now.”

                “You keep saying you’re okay Connor. But it’s okay if you’re not. I want you to know that,” Luka said seriously. “You always try to handle things on your own Connor. I never want you to feel alone. I’ll never let you be alone. I promise. No matter what you’re going through, you can always trust me to be there for you. Even if you can’t talk about the problem for any reason, you can always count on me to be right by your side until it’s over. I just…I just want you to know that. I love you so much, and I can tell you’re going through a lot right now. You don’t have to keep saying you’re okay. There’s nothing wrong with being a little broken, Connor.”

                “Luka,” I whispered. I didn’t even have words for that. It’s like he could read my mind. Like he knew exactly what I was going through, and exactly what I needed to hear.

                My feelings from earlier began to creep up on me and I desperately fought against them. Luka hugged me tightly, and I rested my head on his chest, squeezing my eyes shut.

                “God I love you Luka,” I managed to say. I didn’t deserve him. Hell, I don’t even know how I was fortunate enough to get him in the first place.

                I had fucked up big time with the affair. But I would do everything I could to make it up to Luka, even though he didn’t even know it had happened. I never wanted to lose him or his trust.

                My fear of being alone had nothing to do with me not wanting to lose Luka. I loved him far too much to lose him. I would do everything in my power to stop Blake from revealing the truth to Luka.

                “I really love you Luka,” I promised, kissing him fiercely.

                I knew I would have to get him out of the house before my parents got home. But since it was just us for right now, Luka and I disintegrated into physical love. And as we made love, it was just me and him. No one else seemed to exist in that beautiful moment.

                Blake would never take that away from us. I wouldn’t let him. It was time for me to fight back and protect my relationship with Luka.