Rey's POV
I scoop the last pile of dirt, placing it on Apollo's grave as the salty air dances around me.

The sun sets on the horizon and a porg sits watching me.

His black eyes watching me and occasionally flapping his wings like he's going to fly away, but doesn't.

He won't leave me while I complete this task, unlike Ben who started crying and Kayla suddenly needed help.

We had a peaceful ceremony this morning for him, but I can't help but feel an emptiness continually grow within me.

I look at the sun one last time, before picking up my staff and walking away.

I hear the familiar noise of the porg following me. He waddles quickly to keep up, but manages.

I walk through Luke and I's old camp and remember nights alone wondering why he wouldn't teach me, but finally convincing him. I remember I had to get Chewbacca's help and telling him of Han's betrayal from Kylo. It was one of the first time's I had seen his rock expression change, but it's one of the reasons he finally agreed to help me, although he almost quit a couple times. 

I walk away, not wanting to recall anymore. The porg follows me to where I used to train. The destroyed rock remains how I left it, crumbled on the ground into pieces. I sit on the largest piece and the porg comes in front of me. 

He makes a curious noise and tilts his head. 

"Why are you following me?" I stare at him. 

He sqwacks in return. 

"I can't understand you." I tell him. "So why did I ever start talking to you." I whisper to myself and hang my head.  

He comes forward and bumps my leg. I look at him and he bumps me again. "What?" I ask. He bumps me, yet again with his head, but rubs it afterwards. "You want to me petted?" I ask. 

He does a happy sqwack and I reach my hand out. He quickly waddles over to it and rubs his head under it. 

I proceed by rubbing his head and going with the flow of his feathers. 

"If you're not going to leave me alone, I'll have to name you."

He does a happy sqwack, as if he can understand me. 

"Wait, can you-?" I begin to ask, but am cut off by him moving and he bites my hand gently, then nods with my finger in his mouth. 

"Well then little guy, do you have a name?" 

He shakes his body and I take it as a no.

"Well let's give you one." I think for a moment. "How about Jak?"

He nods again with my finger still in his mouth.

"Well Jak, can I have my finger back?"

He lets go and gives a sqwack.

"Still can't understand you." I shake my head and realize how dark it is getting. "Let's go." We leave and head back to the Falcon.

"It's done." I tell Ben as I pass him.

"Rey-" Kayla begins to follow me to Apollo's old room which Ben and I have taken back over.

"I'm fine." I lie.

I close the door and hear Jak sqwack.

I open and let him in and Ben is behind him.

"Found a friend?" He asks and enters with Jak.

"Yeah, this is Jak?"

"How do you spell that?" He asks and pulls out some night clothes.

"J-A-K." I tell him, while I do the same.

"That's pronounced Jack."

"No, it's like Jake."

"Well he responds to Jack." He looks down and the porg is looking at him.

"Well Jak, has been responding to it being pronounced like Jake." I say and he looks at me.

"Jak." Ben says like Jack.

"Jak." I say like Jake.

The porg looks back and forth between us, then comes over to my leg and brushes against me.

"He likes me better." I smile.

Jak then flies up to the open drawer and snuggles down inside of it.

"No going to the bathroom." Ben points to Jak.

He sqwacks back in return, then closes his eyes.

I change in silence, along with Ben.

I can smell Apollo in the room and I know it must be hard for Ben.

"Ben-"

"I'm fine." He cuts me off with my own lie. "We're fine." He come over to me. "We have a baby on the way and that's what we will worry about." He places a hand on my stomach. "Not Yerha, my family, or the war. Just our little family."

I smile, but feel a hesitancy towards becoming a mother by blood.

"What's wrong?" He asks sensing me.

"I don't think I'm ready."

"Well it's a little late for that Rey." He withdraws his hand.

"Ben, I couldn't even save Apollo and he was like my son."

"Well this will be our child, we'll find a way to save them." He counters.

"You can't save someone after a lightsaber goes through their heart." I angrily counter.

"I know!" He snaps and I stare in shock. "I know." He says more calmly. "Believe me Rey I know." He exits our room and I feel the guilt and sadness weigh down on me.

Han.

I place a hand to my stomach and look at Jak who stares at me.

"It's alright." I pet his head, then head off to find Ben.

I feel the draft coming from the ramp and head over there to find him sitting in the moonlight now.

"I'm sorry." I say.

"I am too." He says without turning around.

I walk down to him and sit next to him.

"Ben... I'm scared." I tell him.

"Why?" He turns. "We'll keep our baby away from the war."

"Our baby can die from other causes and what if I'm not a good mother? I don't even think my breasts will produce milk."

"Rey." He turns to me. "We'll figure it out." 

I give a slow nod. "I just don't want to get my heart broken again." I take a shaky breath. 

"I know." He puts an arm around me. "It's better to have loved and lost then to have never loved at all."

I lean against him and try to swallow my feelings.

- - -

I wake in bed next to Ben.

Something's wrong I sense.

I feel a sinking feeling in my stomach, head, and heart.

I feel a weigh drain from me.

A wetness begins to pool under me.

I jump out of bed and run to the bathroom, as the liquid runs down my leg and I feel my stomach drop further and travel down.

I enter the bathroom turning on the light. I look to the mirror.

Red...

Blood...

I'm bleeding.

"Kayla!" I call out. "Kayla!" I lean against the wall and sink down.

"Rey?" I hear her rush down the hallway. "Rey are you-" She sees the blood.

"Kayla, what's happening?" I ask shaking furiously.

She bites her lip.

"Is this normal?" I ask.

She shakes her head. "You had a miscarriage."

A/N: Apollo and now this?!?! You all probably hate me now.