I open the door with a muffin in my hand and a pen stuck behind my ear. I have been writing an essay and snacking on strawberry muffins since morning. I open my mouth to take another bite as I face the person at the door. Is it possible to feel both happy and embarrassed? Because I do.

I lower my hand and wipe muffin crumbs from my face. I remove the pen hastily from the back of my ear. I can't believe Kystan is seeing me in such an unkempt state.

Kystan doesn't even seem to notice. "Good morning, beautiful." He says with a buoyant smile on his face.

Why do I like the sound of that too much? "Good morning." I reply bashfully. I can't believe that I still get shy when he compliments me.

"What are you doing?" He asks casually.

"I was doing some school work." I answer.

He raises an eyebrow, "Does it involve muffins?" He gestures to the muffin still in my hand.

"No." I answer sheepishly, "I got hungry." I answer. I notice then that he is standing a little awkwardly, I wonder what is wrong.

He changes the subject, "Did you sleep well last night?" I am starting to wonder why he is making a lot of small talk. Then I notice what is wrong with his posture; he has been hiding his hand behind his back this whole time.

"What are you hiding behind your back?" I ask.

He looks like he has been waiting for me to ask that the entire time. "Do you want to see it?" He asks.

"Yes." I answer immediately.

When he sees how excited I am, he says "I think I'll keep it for later." He walks backwards to his car, with his back away from me, and places whatever it is back into the car. I am only able to see the small box it is in.

He comes back with nothing in his hands. I look at him sourly. Why does he have to tease me so? "Leave my property." I say and make a move to close the door. Obviously, I am just bluffing, I do not close it but rather look at him as he laughs at my annoyance.

When his laughter dies down, he says, "I'd love to take you on a date." His hand lightly brushes against my cheek.

"Yes." I answer softly. "Let me just go and get ready."

"I'll wait for you in the car." I prepare with lightning speed. I skip the makeup and put on clothes as fast as I can. I walk back downstairs after ten minutes.

I climb into the passenger seat and put on my seatbelt. I look at Kystan and find his eyes transfixed on me, "You are gorgeous." He says out of the blue.

"Thank you." I'll never get tired of it. "Where are we going?" I ask.

"To a place I found." He answers vaguely. The look he gives me is a sure promise that I am going to like what lays ahead. I take that as my answer and dedicate my time to choosing a song on the radio. When I find the right one, I roll the window down and let the wind blow into my face as I listen to loud music and occasionally sing along when a song I know comes on. Kystan joins in as well.

After an hour of driving, he takes a turn off the main road. We go through a path lined with tall birch trees. The air lightens as we get farther into nature. The trees thicken and more varieties of trees appear. I sit in silent awe at how he discovered such an invalidly beautiful place. Suddenly, we reach a clearing. Kystan parks the car. I look at him like I am asking for his permission to love this place. He nods.

I get out of the car and stand a few steps away. A breeze rustles the trees and blows my hair sideways. It is so enchanting here, with the trees towering so high above me, but still letting some light seep through, the leaves look so green it is almost rejuvenating looking at such health and vitality. I go back to the car and pull Kystan out to come and experience this place with me.

He lets me lead him to the middle of the clearing and we hold each other as the birds chirp in a tree nearby and nature manifests its majesty. "I love you." He whispers in my ear so quietly I almost think I imagined it.

I look up and see his eyes, "Say it again." I urge him softly.

"I love you." He says a little louder than the first time.

I run out of his arms and stand a little farther, "What did you say?" I ask playfully.

"I love you." He shouts. I am elated to hear him proclaim his love for me this fervently and loudly, just the two of us around with no one in close proximity to interrupt us.

I run even farther, "What?" I ask.

"I love you, Liza." He yells with his arms wide open and his head hanging back.

I join him and also shout, "I love you, Kystan." After repeating it a couple of times, we fall silent and hear our voices carry through the trees until the echo fades into nothingness. I walk back to where he is standing and hold onto him, he crashes his lips onto mine and kisses me passionately. I kiss him back just as energetically.

At this moment we feel like it's just us two, and surely it is, out here at least. And maybe, I think my forever might be with him. I store the thought away and just smile with his lips still on mine.

When the night falls, we sit in the trunk of his car, both of us wrapped in a blanket with only the light from the moon to illuminate the night. "I won't stop you from leaving." I say. He looks at me with a silent happiness in his eyes, it strums at my heartstrings.

A slight breeze passes before he has a chance to answer, "Promise me you'll wait for me." He says while looking me in the eyes. I nod solemnly.

He gets up and jumps out of the trunk to go to the front side of the car. I can hear him rummaging through the inside of the car but I do not look there. He comes back bearing the small box in his hand. He climbs into the trunk and kneels in front of me. I look at him with surprise.

He looks me in the eyes and says these words, "This might be imposing too much on you, but I just want you to promise me that in time I won't be here. you'll not forget me. It would break my heart if-" he doesn't say it but I know what he means, if we broke up again, or worse found someone else. "Please, promise me." He says and opens the box to reveal a thin, beautifully crafted necklace. It has an equally small L at the front.

"I promise." I answer. I let him fasten it onto my neck. I am certain I won't remove this anytime in the near future. "Do you promise me the same?" I ask him as well.

"I do." He answers with no hesitation. He sits down beside me again. I can't stop myself from touching the necklace. It feels like I am now bound to him by this thin piece of metal and I am not averse to it. "I love it." I say.

He examines me, " I knew you would." He answers and wraps his arm around my shoulder. At some point we lie down and cuddle in the trunk of his car while looking at the constellations high above.

One week after our getaway, Kystan and Luca are scheduled to leave the next day. I go over to his house early in the morning. I am ushered in by Luca. He looks to be in search of something, so I let him be and continue on my way to Kystan's room. I find him sitting on his bed amidst many clothes strewn everywhere. He looks lost among all the clutter.

He looks up when I enter, relieved to see me. "Thank god you're here." He says and sighs with relief, "May you help me out?" He asks and looks at me expectantly.

I plop my butt on the bed, "Sure." I answer and start looking through the clothes trying to gauge how much there is and, secretly, looking for a hoodie to take from him. As I rummage through the clothes, I pull up a piece of clothing unknowing that it is his boxer briefs. I turn it sideways without getting a clue until I notice the quizzical look that he is giving me. Realization finally dawns on me. I quickly let go of the boxers and use my hair to hide my flaming face.

After that incident, Kystan has to take all his underwear to the side before I can proceed. In the middle of packing, we end up tossing clothes at each other for fun. I don't know who started it, and all our progress is lost. We do that for a while until we realize we are too childish for our own good and head downstairs to eat.

After eating, I make Kystan leave the room so that I can finish packing lest we start tossing clothes again. When I am done, I meet him downstairs and we go to the living room to watch a movie while cuddled on the couch. I don't know when or why but I feel sad all of a sudden. Kystan notices and pauses the movie. "What is it?" He asks with concern.

I feel a lump in my throat like I am going to cry, and sure enough tears well up in my eyes, "Nothing." I answer and dub a finger on my eyes to stop the tears from flowing out. Instead, they stream down my cheek.

"Why are you crying?" He is worried, he tightens his hold on me.

I take a moment before I answer, "I'll miss you." I answer softly.

He brings his hand to my cheeks and wipes my tears away. "I will miss you too." He says, "Don't cry, okay?"

I nod and wipe my tears away. From then on I lay my head on his chest and revel in the moment. Subconsciously, I am storing away these moments for when he'll be miles away.

We go through three movies without leaving the spot; it's already night when we finish the last one. We have a very lively dinner, with Asher and Luca with a lot of jokes from Luca about their time in Japan. It almost takes away the gloom of the approaching departure.

We end our day by going into bed together. I lie on my side and look at him.

"What are you going to do there in-" I don't even remember how to pronounce the word.

"In Rwanda." He interjects. "I am going for consulting work. After I am done with it, I'll come back and graduate." He says.

"Will you start looking for a job when you graduate or?"

"Actually, I want to revive my parents' bakeries." He looks at me like he expects my approval.

But first I have to ask, "Do you have the money for that?"

"Yes. My parents had savings and trust funds," He pauses before he adds, "And their death benefit."

"I know without a doubt you'll be successful." I say with a smile. "What are you going to do when you come back?" I ask as a way to take his mind away from thoughts of his parents.

"I guess. I'll first buy a house and the rest will come after."

"Am I allowed to visit?" I ask even though I clearly know the answer.

His lips form an amused smile, "I'd rather you move in."

My eyebrows hit the ceiling, "Really? What will happen if I move in?" I ask with curiosity.

"A lot of things." The way he says 'things' alludes to meanings much more sensual than the mere word. I feel the air between us shift to something fiery and crackling with energy.

"What kind of 'things'?" I ask temptingly.

"Do you want me to show you?" He asks. His eyes betray the passion and desire he is feeling.

I sit up languidly with my eyes trained on him and remove my t-shirt, "Show me."

And so he does.

In the morning, I wake up with a smile playing on my lips, the sight of Kystan laying next to me still asleep brings memories from last night. If I thought it would be hard without him before, now it is harder, because now I know what it feels like to be loved utterly by him, and I'll have to wait a whole year before I can feel it again.

I put my head back on the pillow and stare at Kystan as he sleeps. It is a few minutes before he wakes up, his eyes still hazy from sleep. He sits up and stretches his arms, giving me a good view of his rippling muscles. He rubs his eyes to focus better and then looks at me.

"How are you feeling?" He asks as he lies back down.

"I feel amazing." I answer. He slides his arm through the sheets and wraps it around my waist.

"Ugh, why do I have to go?" He whines.

I laugh at how childish he sounds. I inch forward and kiss him. He responds back. "I love you." I say before we part.

"I love you." He responds. "But now I have to leave you." He says in that same whiny voice.

"That sounds so poetic." I say with amusement

"As I always say,-"

"You're a man of many abilities, I know." He looks at me with adoration before he pecks my lips and gets up to prepare.

As he bathes, I get out of bed and sit a moment pulling everything in. The neat way he stacks his book on the table, the matching jacket draped on his chair, but most of all, his scent subtly tinging the air.

When we arrive at LCY, we leisurely walk through the airport while holding hands. We reach the final gate before parting. I want to hold on and not let him leave me. But I can't. He turns to me and holds both of my hands. I look up into his eyes. "Don't sleepwalk too much without me." He says with a small smile.

"I won't." I answer. If he doesn't leave soon I'm going to start bawling, and I don't want him to leave with such an ugly last sight of me. I put on a smile and hug him. He puts one arm around me and the other combs through my hair. A tear escapes my eye.

I let it flow down, where he won't see it. I wipe it away, and face him with renewed zeal. We hear his gate being announced on the intercom, it is going to close in five minutes. I let go of him and only manage to get a fleeting kiss then he has to go. 

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