pitch black was all minho could see. he felt like was floating, drifting through an endless sea of lifeless darkness. he couldn't make sense of anything, and all his thoughts were practically nonexistent.

for that moment, he felt infinite, timeless. peaceful. serene.

he was free of any disturbance, of any feelings which showcased upcoming doom, and for that, he was grateful.

but suddenly, he felt caged. imaginary cuffs laced around his wrists, restricting him from his unhibited drifting. gravity enclosed its grip around his skin, pulling and pulling and pulling him lower.

and lower.

and lower.

but minho wanted to be released. he wanted to be freed, to escape once more into that vast darkness that made him experience that feeling of weightlessness and liberation he so greatly desired.

he wanted to float again.

from the darkness, he made an ungraceful descent into a blazing light, one that made his head throb with an incoming headache. the light flashed in front his eyelids, forcing his eyes to open despite minho not wanting them to.

minho felt trapped once more as a searing gleam irritated his eyes, exposing his irises to a white so dazzling, it made his headache increase by a ten-fold.

dryness ravaged at his throat when his dry lips parted for a sharp intake of oxygen, and his body was confined to one spot. his wrists felt locked in place, and suddenly minho didn't feel so limitless anymore.

he was alone, but minho didn't feel alone.

tiny beeps entered his eardrums and pounded their way into his head, and his tired eyes drifted to his left wrist, which had been heavily bandaged, iv drips connected into the pale skin.

no... minho couldn't believe it.

no no no no no.

he couldn't believe he was alive. he couldn't believe that he'd done all that -- that he'd slit his wrists -- all for nothing.

NO!

the hoarseness in minho's throat worsened when a dry sob left his lips. his lungs felt compressed as he struggled to breath, hyperventilating at the fact that he was still alive, that he was saved.

why did this always have to happen to him? why couldn't he just end his life and be done with it once and for all? why did he always have to be rescued?

minho would have reached out to tear the bandages covering his wrists had he not felt completely and utterly worn-out. he wanted to dissociate from everything, but yet he didn't even have the energy to do that.

the door opened with a click, but minho didn't bother looking up. he wanted to block everything out, to make himself believe that he was actually dead right now, but the faint beeping of the heart monitor next to him testified another thing entirely.

"mr. lee, we're so glad you've woken up," a cheerful female voice etched itself into his brain, and a lump formed inside minho's throat at the emotional pain he experienced right that second.

he didn't want to wake up, but yet those people made him to. why couldn't they just let him be?

when minho glanced up, he was met with a woman with silky, long black hair and a gentle smile on her face. in her hands held a clipboard, and a shorter lady stood next to her, her outfit signifying that she was a nurse.

"you were extremely lucky, mr. lee, especially with the amount of blood that you'd lost. your body went into shock and you'd passed out in your bathroom as a result, but fortunately a friend of yours had managed to call the ambulance on time," her smile widened into a grin, showcasing her pearly whites, but her eyes looked sympathetic. minho immediately loathed her.

"nurse kim will be checking your vitals to see if everything is okay," the female doctor continued to speak, but at this point in time, minho wanted to drown her voice out.

he was silent as the whole thing took place, trying his hardest not to push the nurse away when she touched his body and exchanged the iv for a new one. when the short nurse was done, she left the room, leaving minho and the doctor behind.

"...i know you probably don't want me to talk about this," the doctor, dr. yang, started, her eyes trained on minho's blank face, "but when you arrived at the hospital, we notice you'd...slit your wrists. would you mind telling me why?"

minho bit hard on his lip. the headache inside his head grew, engulfing the back of his head entirely. irritation swirled within him, and his dry throat did not make things any better.

"it's none of your business," minho replied.

dr. yang paused, before speaking up once again. "but, mr. lee -- "

"you've done your deed as a doctor, right?" minho interrupted, glaring at her, "you saved me, and prevented me from dying. that's enough. you have no right to ask about anything else. i'm not going to answer you."

despite his harsh tone, the doctor still looked at him with pity in her eyes, and that enraged him even further.

stop looking at me like that! minho's mind shouted, since he was too weak to say it out loud. the headache spread across his forehead like an uncontrollable forest fire, and his eyes stung with tears at the sharp flare of pain.

"mr. lee," the dark haired doctor began again. "would you like to speak to anyone? our visiting hours aren't open yet, but you look like you need someone to talk to. perhaps that friend of yours would do?"

minho's head perked up at her words. "who...who called the ambulance for me?"

"a man by the name of kim woojin. he was with another set of people when the ambulance arrived to pick you up, and with the way he acted all the way to the hospital, we could tell he cares about you a lot."

by 'another set of people', minho knew she meant his other friends seungmin, changbin and felix. at that moment, he felt ashamed, because now he knew they'd witnessed him at his lowest point. he didn't want to face them now as a result.

"can you get woojin for me?" minho asked, all the edge leaving his voice. he wanted to see the male so badly, and finally wanted to talk to him about what had been bothering him all this time.

"i will do that, mr. lee."

"and also, tell him...tell him to bring my phone along. that is, if he has it with him."

***

minho felt nothing but relief when woojin entered the room he was in, his eyes widening when they came across the younger male.

he was dressed casually -- in a maroon sweater and dark jeans -- and in his hand held the phone the belonged to minho.

"minho," he breathed out once he sat down at the singular chair beside his friend's bed. "how -- how are you?"

"okay," was minho's response. despite a nurse giving him a glass of water previously, his throat still felt like sandpaper.

"that's... that's good."

"no it's not."

silence.

"minho -- "

"i don't wanna talk about what happened," minho said. he gestured to the phone in woojin's hand, and when the older male passed it to him, he turned it on. "i just want to explain some things to you."

"alright," woojin answered, pursing his lips.

before long, minho was looking through his phone with his uninjured hand for all the text messages between him and jisung. he was finally going to reveal everything to woojin, and all he could hope for was that the male wouldn't think of him as strange after this. he didn't know what he'd do with himself if that happened.

when he got to the first ever texts sent to him by jisung, he passed the phone to woojin.

"the reason i've been like this is because i've been driven to my wits end because of this person, or thing -- i don't even care," minho started, chewing on his lower lip. "the person, han jisung, he's been... harassing me, bringing me down. whenever i tried to stop talking to him, he'd always threaten me, along with his friends..."

woojin started looking through the texts, his eyes contemplative at first. as those texts progressed though, the expression in his eyes changed into one that was unreadable.

"i...i fucking hate him, woojin. i-i hate him so much. he's the reason why i've become so... so mentally and physically unstable. he's ruining my life." minho's cheeks were hot as tears ran over them. "he's why i decided to do what i did. i just don't want to see him anymore..."

"minho, i..." woojin started. his eyes locked with the younger's, his lips parting to say something but not being able to do so in the end.

"what? what is it?" minho asked. "do you think i'm crazy? is that it?"

"n-no," woojin stuttered. he let out a huge sigh. "i... minho..."

"woojin, just say what you want to say. spit it out!"

"there aren't any texts on your phone addressed to someone with 'han jisung' as their name." woojin faced the phone towards minho, his expression dimming. "you've -- you've been texting yourself this whole time."

minho grabbed his phone from woojin's grip, his hands shaking wildly as his fingers scrolled through the messages. "y-you're wrong, woojin. jisung's here. he's here!"

"minho -- "

"he's here woojin! he's right here! can't you see?! h-he's been texting me ever since school started!" minho exclaimed. he started hyperventilating again, and several thoughts coursed through his head at once. "he's fucking there woojin! why can't you see that?!"

the door opened, and a nurse stepped in.

"is everything alright?" she asked.

"minho, please listen to me," woojin tried to plead with the distressed male, but minho was still looking through the messages, trying to show all of the texts to him.

"woojin, he's here! can't you read those texts?! why can't you read them?! they're right here goddammit!"

"mr. lee, you need to calm down," the nurse spoke, heading to where minho was. she looked at woojin. "sir, i think you need to leave."

"no!" minho shouted. "woojin's not leaving until he's seen the texts! can't you see them too, nurse?! they're there! right there!"

"sir, please leave," the nurse told woojin.

"i-i can't leave him like this..."

"why aren't you two listening to me?!" minho questioned. he was crying so hard now, his vision fogged with unrelenting tears. he wanted to scream, wanted to kick or throw something against a wall. he fucking hated that this was happening to him. "the texts are right there! t-they're right there!"

the nurse placed a hand on minho's shoulder, saying words to him that he couldn't even hear, trying to coax him into calming down.

"minho!" woojin shouted just as the latter clamped his right hand over his left wrist, trying to tear off the bandage keeping everything in place. "minho, stop!"

"call a doctor, quick!" the nurse commanded woojin, trying to hold minho in place.

woojin, don't leave me, he thought just as he spotted the silver haired male running out of his room. please...

his body grew limp just as a doctor made his way to him, and he blacked out a second after that.

***

a/n: thoughts?