15

Hey Alison, you there?

I glared at the text, incredibly annoyed. Should I answer back? He would probably keep on texting me whether I told him to leave me alone or not.

But then I thought, well, I can do two things at once. So I started the movie and replied to him.

What? You don't need me to come get you again, do you?

No.

Good. I'm trying to watch a movie. Don't text me anymore.

I knew good and well that telling him not to text me anymore wouldn't do a bit of good, because he's Flynn and he's annoying. But I at least wanted him to know that I wasn't glad to be talking to him.

I had turned back to the movie when my phone buzzed again, and I glanced down at the newest message.

Aw come on Alison

I rolled my eyes and focused my attention back on the movie. I'd come up with a snide comment to reply with later.

My phone buzzed several times during the first thirty minutes of the movie, but I ignored it. I'd text during my bathroom/snack break.

When I was forty-five minutes into the thing, I paused it and went to the bathroom. When I finished there, I grabbed my phone up off my bed and headed downstairs for a snack. I don't text on the toilet because I don't want the hackers (who may or may not work for the government, but whatever) to see me peeing.

I checked my messages as I trotted down the stairs. Much to my utter joy, instead of all seven new messages being from Flynn the Obnoxious Movie Interrupter, there was a text from Jenna. I looked at it first.

Hey Ali I thought of something you could do with Flynn on the date you get to plan so he won't fall in love with you anymore than he already has. 

You don't have to text me back. I saw a sign saying there's gonna be a movie night in the park with a projector. 

Not sure what movie is gonna play but you could check on it. Or I'll get back to you with better info, whatever. XOXO

Perfect. And this time I wasn't being sarcastic. A movie was something that wouldn't be sentimental or romantic, and give me a reason to completely ignore Flynn, a good excuse not to talk, other than me just ignoring him because I want to.

I walked across the living room, staring at the six new messages from Flynn, but not really comprehending them until after I'd gotten some popcorn popping. And not the gross microwave kind either. I only eat the good stuff that is made in my special popcorn-popping machine!

I plopped down at the kitchen table, and read the first new Flynn text.

So what movie are you watching?

You really should answer me.

Lord of the Rings again?

Oh wait, I forgot. The Hobbit. Dildo and the gang.

You know, Groin and Kiki?

The latest text from him was dated about ten minutes after the one about "Groin" and "Kiki".

You're really not gonna correct me? Should I find the nearest bomb shelter and take shelter in it?

That last one was from fifteen minutes ago, but I took his bait. Stupid me.

Bilbo, Kili, Gloin!!!! Idiot.

It took about a second for his next reply to come in.

Ahh, there she is! Movie over yet?

Snack break, I replied.

Popcorn?

Obviously.

So what movie are you watching?

Pride and Prejudice. The 2005 one.

Like it so far?

I'm only 45 minutes in

It's really good. My favorite version, even if it isn't much like the book.

I was surprised. How do you know about pride and prejudice? It's kind of a girly movie and book.

Who decides what's girly or not? I'll watch or read what I want. Screw society.

My popcorn was ready at this moment, and I left my phone on the table to go see to it. When I returned for my device, there was a new text from Jenna, as well as another from Flynn.

Jenna's text was read first, of course: it's the first Harry Potter movie they're playing in the park! It's like they knew you were coming!

I replied with a simple happy emoji and a thank you. She sent me another smiling emoji and said, Anything for you Ali

I really don't deserve her. She's the best.

Flynn's text was annoying: Wanna play a game? Don't worry it's not creepy or anything. We just ask each other random silly questions

Fine. But don't expect answers to every single one or immediate responses either because I'm resuming my movie, I said before heading back upstairs to finish the thing.

He didn't reply for a few minutes, I guess because he was trying to think of a good question. I was glad, because it gave me time to get settled and once again become immersed in the movie.

And now, readers, for your viewing pleasure, I present to you the long conversation I accidentally had with Flynn Tyler late into the night, against my better judgement, and I probably made him think I liked him back if he even liked me like that in the first place! I don't want I boyfriend! Ugh.

Flynn: what's the worst thing that ever happened to you?

Me: Some jerk put my name in the Goblet of Fire

Flynn: Fair enough

Flynn: What's the weirdest thing that ever happened to you?

Me: See the above answer

Flynn: right. Do you believe in ghosts?

Me: maybe. You?

Flynn: definitely

Flynn: what's your favorite color?

Me: yellow. What's yours?

Flynn: green

Me: then why do you always wear black?

Flynn: because it makes me look mysterious and I have a reputation to uphold. After all, a fake reputation is all a man has (that's a movie reference, did you get it?)

Me: no

Flynn: aw come on!

Me: you come on

Flynn: it's tangled! You know, Rapunzel, Flynn Rider, magic hair

Me: oh. Do you enjoy having the same name as a Disney character?

Flynn: technically it's an alias for Eugene Fitzherbert, but sure

Me: how do you know all this stuff about girly movies

Flynn: I already told you! Who decides what's girly! I'll watch what I want

Me: so does that mean you like the Notebook?

Flynn: meh

Me: I hate the Notebook

Flynn: do you like kids though?

Me: ugh I hate kids

Flynn: why?

Me: because they're kids, obviously. Why, do you like kids?

Flynn: on a scale from 1 to 10, 10 being I really like them, I'd say about a 4, they have their good and bad moments. Mostly bad moments.

Me: I hate kids

Flynn: anyway...do you have any other siblings I don't know about?

Me: nope do you?

Flynn: no just Angela

Flynn: okay so do you really hate me?

Me: hate's a strong word. I dislike you

Flynn: ouch. But at least you don't hate me like you hate kids

Me: I loathe children

Flynn: you know that in some people's eyes you're still a kid yourself right?

Me: but I don't slobber and snot all over everything and get food all over my face and refuse to shut up when told to do so

Flynn: you have a point. Except for the last thing. You love to talk

Me: humph

Flynn: Weird question now. Do you actually think that spiders really crawl into your mouth while you're asleep?

Me: I think that's a preposterous theory

Flynn: same

Me: so what's the worst thing that ever happened to you?

Flynn: too awful to mention

Me: come on, the Terms and Agreements forbid secrets

Flynn: nope

Me: fine you'll tell me later then

Flynn: apparently you don't understand the meaning of the word no. And are you ever going to make a material version of the Terms and Agreements so that I can actually read them?

Me: perhaps I should look into it

Flynn: it would be very helpful to me

Me: why did you put my name in the Goblet of Fire?

Flynn: I told you already, I wanted to meet you

Me: why do you insist upon entering yourself into my life?

Flynn: I need a weirdo in my life. Everyone does

Me: ugh

Flynn: so, I have a very serious question for you

My first thought: uh oh.